The Siren's Heart
Page 16
Aster was paralyzed with fear, until her brain kicked in. She had to decide there and then if she wanted to out the fact that Lycus was her father. It could be bad for both of them, or it could be exactly what she needed to convince him that she was family and not a threat.
“I’m your granddaughter.” Her mind revolted at the statement. She desperately did not want to be related to the pale, horned creature she’d seen in the Underworld, and yet she was, and if he finally realized she wasn’t about to take over, then it would work out for both of them.
He didn’t respond. The yellow orbs of his eyes just hovered there in front of her. When they blinked slowly, she wanted to flinch.
“Impossible.”
She wanted to laugh. How could someone who was so familiar with people’s dreams and nightmares not think what she said was even possible?
“Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much—”
“I don’t need your childish games,” he snapped. “If you are my granddaughter, then who is your father?”
“Lycus.”
She felt a great wind pick up and circle her like she was the very narrow center of a hurricane. He was angry and suspicious. The emotions radiated toward her through the wind as though he were trying to scare her once more. What he didn’t realize was that after the conversation with Dem and the reminder of everything she’d lived through with the Order of Talos, it would take a lot more than some wind and spooky eyes to scare her. The core of steel that she had needed before was back, and nothing could break it. Besides, it didn’t matter what she said, he wouldn’t believe her without proof.
“Chloe is my mother. You forbid them from seeing each other by tormenting her with nightmares and painful marks, just like you are doing to me. What you didn’t know was that she was already pregnant with me by the time they gave in to your cruelty.” She spat the words at him, letting the truth ring in each one. There was no way he could dispute what she was telling him. He had to know she spoke the truth.
He was silent a moment more, but the yellow eyes had appeared before her once again and the wind had died down.
“It seems you are fated to relive your mother’s history.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” She snarled the question at him, but his presence was already gone.
Now, she was just left with whatever nightmare he had concocted for her this time.
As the world came into focus around her, the first thing she could make out was the bright colors of children’s toys. They were scattered on the floor in front of her. A blonde head popped up in her vision. The deep blue eyes watched her for a moment.
“Mommy! I hid, but you never came!”
She broke out in a cold sweat. This was different from any of the other dreams Phobetor had given her. This was something she hadn’t lived through. Something that truly scared her.
“I’m sorry. Mommy’s not feeling very well.”
The little girl pouted before her eyes widened with an idea. “You want Daddy?”
“No, that’s okay.”
Aster began to push herself up off the ground. The child, who was maybe five or six years old, clamped her little hand around some of Aster’s fingers. She had no idea what to do. She’d never been around kids much when she was growing up. There were no babysitting jobs in her past to prepare her for this moment, no nieces or nephews, no cousins. What was she supposed to say? To do? How intelligent was this kid? Anxiety blossomed in her chest, making it hard to breathe.
“Where’s Daddy?”
“He’s with Uncle T.”
“Can you show me?”
The little girl released her hand and skipped away in front of Aster, her little skirt bouncing along with her. Aster followed, and when the girl stopped in front of a set of closed doors, Aster bent down and whispered a thank you in her ears. Two little arms wrapped around her neck.
“Up.”
Aster scooped her up, resting her against her hip, while the little girl cooed a song in her ear.
Her heart skipped a beat.
The voices from the other side of the door were immediately recognizable. Uncle T was Thad. Did that mean . . . ? She looked at the little girl’s dark-blue eyes again. They weren’t her eyes, that was for sure. Was Dem her father?
She could make out what they were talking about, and just as her heart began to feel full at the idea of her and Dem being together and having a child, it was broken.
“Look, I just wanted to give you guys a heads-up. When I tell her, she’s going to need support, and obviously I won’t be the one providing that.” Dem’s deep voice rang in her ears.
“Have you even tried to talk to her about this?” Cin asked.
“Of course, but she won’t listen.”
“I can’t believe you’d leave them like that. Leave us.” Thad’s voice was soft and laced with pain as he spoke, making Aster’s stomach twist.
Dem was leaving them because of something she did.
She slid the door open. The look on their faces was enough to tell her she had assumed correctly.
“Aster . . . Whatever you heard—”
“You’re leaving us?” she whispered, this all suddenly seeming too real.
“I’m not cut out to be a dad, you know that. Besides, we don’t even know if she’s my kid. You should find someone who truly loves you. I’m just a placeholder.”
“Not to me,” she whispered.
“Can you put Selene down so we can talk? I can’t have this conversation with her staring at me.”
“Selene?” Confusion settled over her for a second before the little girl squirmed in her arms. Aster had almost forgotten she was holding her. Setting her down, she watched as the mop of blonde curls bounced away.
“Look, we’ve been coexisting ever since we rescued you, but we haven’t loved each other in a very long time, if we ever did. I should never have let you beat Leonard—that’s on me—but I thought I was doing the right thing. Watching you almost kill a man and then seeing the guilt eat you alive has been tough enough. The way you added to the guilt with Selene . . . I’ve never been comfortable with that. You know I never wanted a kid. I’m just going to step back and allow you to find what you need. That’s it,” Dem said, spreading his hands in front of him as if he was being generous with the offer.
“Dem!” Cin gasped, her hand rising to cover her mouth.
“What? You think I don’t love you?”
“Come on, Aster.” He pinched the bridge of his nose as though he were frustrated with a stubborn child.
“I love you. I’ve loved you ever since our weekend together. I just didn’t realize it at the time. Every time I’m near you, you chase the darkness away. You’re my light!”
He sighed and put his hands on his hips. “If you really believe that, then you’re delusional. The way we fight, the fact that we haven’t slept in the same bed in years, and let’s not even begin to think about sex. Ever since she was born, it was like your body erected a ‘Do Not Enter’ sign, and I was barred from the premises. We both deserve better. Your life is short. Live it with someone who can love you.”
“I thought I was.”
“By the gods, Aster, it’s like you’re not even listening. I don’t love you. Did I care about you at one point? Sure. But love? You know my heart has always belonged to someone else. I warned you about that, so you can’t blame me for you ignoring it. I’ve got an apartment on the mainland, in a different state. Don’t come looking for me. I—”
“You can’t be serious?” she shrieked as the pain in her chest almost overwhelmed her.
“I. Do. Not. Love. You. I didn’t want to be cruel about it, but I also didn’t think you were delusional, but there we go. Look, I wish you and Selene the best. Just make sure to hide the darkness when you start dating, or it’ll creep them out and you’ll die alone,” he said as he gestured to his eye.
“What the hell, Dem?” Her hand came up to her face, protectively covering the ey
e that didn’t work. She furiously blinked back tears as she looked at the ground, trying to regain control. When she looked up, he was gone. Thad and Cin stood there, mouths agape. And she just crumpled.
Before she even realized it, she was on the floor. It was like her heart had been ripped from her chest. She had an invisible gaping wound that made it impossible to breathe, so she just lay on the floor like a fish out of water, desperately trying to save itself without knowing how. The tears weren’t there, the damage still too deep and too clean to register completely.
When it began to sink in, she took a massive shaking gasp of air as the numbness she’d been feeling receded and pain flared throughout her body, coalescing into the area her heart resided. She was a white dwarf star collapsing in on herself. The energy and light that Dem had provided was now gone, so only the darkness remained.
“Aster—” her sister began.
“Cin, I just . . . I can’t right now.”
“Do you want me to take care of Selene?”
“What?” The fact that she had a child still surprised her. “No, it’s fine. I’ll go.”
The numbness that spread through her as she walked toward the room she had woken up in was unsettling. It was hard to tell if she was still putting one foot in front of the other unless she was looking at them. When she found the playroom, she sat down and watched the little girl, who was playing, completely oblivious to how their lives had just changed.
Everything about her scared Aster, from how small and fragile she was to how much she was going to grow. How could Aster be adult enough to care for another human being? She loved eating burgers and watching movies. Hell, she could barely do her own laundry without screwing it up, so the kid had no chance.
She sighed, and Selene ran over to her, hand outstretched with a building block clutched tightly in its grip. She slowed when she saw Aster’s face, dropping the block and moving full tilt into a hug that was more like she was trying to strangle her mother than comfort her.
When she pulled back, the little girl’s eyes clouded over and her body went slack. Aster knew a vision when she saw one, and it sent ice skittering down her spine. She would never wish visions on a child. The small voice came through with a deeper tone than she’d expected. “Wake up, Sunshine.”
The blackness surrounded her once more, and Selene was gone.
Dem’s face was the first thing she saw as her eyes slowly opened. Tears immediately began to flow as raw sobs threatened to break through the last shred of control that she had. Everything that had happened hadn’t been real, but it could be, and that both terrified and excited her.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“Phobetor,” was all she could manage between hiccupped tears. She tried to think of the last time she’d been this upset, and before she’d been taken, the answer would have been never. “Can you get Cin?” She sniffled as she tried to get control over herself.
“Yeah, yeah, of course.”
She felt him disappear. The feeling of having her heart ground to dust was all too fresh, and looking at where he’d been sitting a moment ago, it seemed like it had happened all over again. As a fresh wave of tears broke through her defenses, Aster curled in on herself, rolling to face the couch, turning her back on the world.
Dem brought Cin with him as quickly as he could, and when the fury stood and jumped out, taking Aster with her, he felt lost. Something had happened and Aster didn’t want to be around him, didn’t want to talk to him, but he had no idea why. Unless this was Phobetor trying to cause trouble.
Thad appeared a moment later.
“Aster’s at our place. I thought you would want to know.” His brother ran his hand through the short pale curls that sat atop his head, looking at him with guilty eyes. His hair was finally starting to grow out again after he had all but shaved his head.
“What the hell is going on?”
“I was hoping you’d be able to tell me.”
“We were talking, and then she slipped into one of the dream-vision things. I watched over her, and when she woke up, she couldn’t look at me. She asked for Cin. I got her and they left. That is literally all I know.”
“I figured. They went straight into the office and shut the door. Whatever is going on, neither of us are part of it right now.”
“What did that asshole show her that made her this upset? She couldn’t even look at me!” Dem’s voice sounded exasperated, even to his own ears.
“I’ll try and find out when I go back, but I wanted to check in first. Are you okay, Brother?”
“Frustrated, but I’m fine.”
“Want to fly?”
Dem nodded. Reconnecting with the sea and the sky was exactly what he needed right now. Following Thad outside, they both made their wings visible, relaxing into their natural state, and pushed off the ground. They twirled and looped and grazed the sea. Eventually, Thad signaled that he was heading in. Dem acknowledged but wasn’t ready yet. Plus, now that he was alone, he could let loose the storm that had been swirling inside him.
The ability to control and create weather was one he’d always cherished, but for most of the last couple centuries, the only thing he’d been able to create was a storm. Sometimes it was thunder and lightning, sometimes it was hail. Rarely it was even a blizzard. Except for when he was with Aster, his brain helpfully pointed out. When they’d been together at the lookout, the wind had become warm, the sky around him had cleared, and the rain had all but stopped. He couldn’t remember the last time that had happened.
Darkness of an intense storm surrounded him, lightning striking, narrowly missing his wings. He would be worried if he’d ever been injured by his own storms before, but the truth was, he suspected that as the creator of the weather, he was somehow invulnerable to it. He’d never had a chance to prove it, though, and wasn’t planning on testing the theory outright at that moment. As the pressure eased inside him, the storm lessened, tapering off from what had been an almost night-like dark to a simple cloudy day. Another thing that was unusual. Until Aster, it had taken his storms hours to pass. Now it was just minutes.
The thought of Aster brought him swooping down toward Thad’s house, only to soar away once more.
As he landed, he checked his phone, hoping like hell she’d messaged him. When he saw the notification symbol, his heart’s tempo increased, only to slow once he saw it was from Thad.
He read it a couple times, trying to get the message through his clouded brain. ‘New info about Phobetor. I think we have a chance at trapping him if we can get a little help.’
If she wanted him, she’d call for him. And if she never called for him? Well, then that would hurt, but he’d heal. He’d done it before, and he hoped he could do it again, because like it or not, he hadn’t been honest with himself about his feelings for Aster. He recognized them now, knew what they were, and hoped he could recover if she left him, if she took her light from him.
Chapter 20
The room Randall stood in was small, but he didn’t want his co-conspirators to think he was wealthier than them. This was a game. He had to play the weak, injured man who needed them, and while the latter part was true, he was no longer weak nor injured. In fact, with his new ability, he felt stronger than ever. The new prosthetic was working well, even if it was still slightly awkward. He would adapt. It was what had made him so successful with Eclipse. He was constantly pivoting, constantly adapting.
This strange little apartment he’d rented to be close to his physical therapist felt cramped and dirty most of the time, but he had learned to overlook that in favor of its positive attributes. It was a property where he could meet other members of the Order and not have eyes on him, on them, all the time, unlike at Eclipse where he knew the High Brother could tap into any security feed he wanted to. A portal appeared on the blank wall, and the old matron appeared.
Sister Beatrice pulled her sneer into a smile as she walked in, but Randall didn’t miss her initial reaction. It was wha
t he had wanted. They would be uncomfortable, they wouldn’t stay, and they wouldn’t expect much of him, and then when he dispatched the siren brothers, brought the seer back, and possibly even his banshee, he would take control of the Order. The humiliation of the past few defeats would be forgotten, and they would all be worshiping at his feet as he led them to a glory greater than the High Brother could even dream of.
Everything was clear in his mind. He just had to get the three of them to bond with him, to give him access to their Keys. He’d thought at first Beatrice and Anna would be enough, but then his rational brain stepped in, demanding to know why he was putting so many eggs in Beatrice’s basket, since Anna’s ability to control her Key was less than optimal. Diversify. Take on other challenges. All of it would only serve to make him stronger, so he recruited Bartholomew as well.
Shortly after Beatrice had settled on the armchair, Sister Anna and Brother Bartholomew walked through their own portals. He smiled devilishly at both of them. They had been easy to coerce. They might hold a decent rank in the Order, but they were weak when it came to physical desires. He played them both like a fiddle, gaining their trust and cooperation without having to explicitly promise anything in return.
“Welcome, everyone. I am glad we could all gather today. I wanted to discuss your Keys.”
He had coffee, tea, and some stale cookies all laid out, making it look like he was making a true effort, but it was all for show. None of it was anything he cared about. The bonding was the only important part, and without the High Brother to facilitate as he had done at the last fight, they needed to do this early to make sure the bond had time to settle.
The three of them regarded each other warily. It was generally considered bad form to talk about one’s Key in front of others, as the power levels varied. Since a member was only ever given one Key, it was a closely guarded secret. There were tales of legendary backstabbings that went on when Keys were public knowledge. People killing one another so their new recruit would get the newly available Key. Eventually, the identity of the Keys had been hidden, but he still knew where to look and who to ask, which was precisely why he’d approached Sister Anna. She was fairly low in the Order but had an extremely powerful Key. It was a shame she was too weak to wield it. Fortunately for her, he was willing to offer his guidance and years of experience.