by P. Mattern
“Here,” she said jumping up lightly and retying her halter top, the ribbons of which hung down her back. Bothe she and Blue shone with a layer of perspiration, but they were both glowing. Fress had enthusiastically added yoga togs to Blues wardrobe - he was wearing a fawn colored loose fitting top and yoga pants and found that he looked forward to his yoga sessions with Nora more than anything else on his schedule.
“Downward dog position again.” She told him, I want to show you something about how you hold your spine… you’re too tense and it’s sapping all the energy from your form!”
Blue assumed the position again, his hair falling over his face. He was putty in the small girl’s hands, and feeling her touch as she ran her small hand along his spine and whispered, ”Relax, relax relax Blue,” certainly put him into a relaxed and transcendental state.
He was fascinated with her. He didn’t even notice her hair color anymore, because the fushia shade looked wonderful with her skin and brought out the most gorgeously golden eyes he’d ever seen. In fact she was the first vampire he’d met with eyes that were that rare color. In his mind she was not only beautiful, but beautiful in an exotic way.
“Relax.” She was saying, and he found that he was grateful to relax the pose and sit facing her again with his legs in lotus position.
Looking at his midsection critically, she reached across the space separating them and patted his solar plexus.
“We’ve only done nine sessions and – LOOK Blue! You are really firming up in the middle. I TOLD you that this stuff is better than weight lifting. Weight lifting is for airheads!”
Blue inwardly flushed with pleasure, hoping that his blushing wouldn’t show on the outside. He knew vamps that worked out-not that they needed to. Cass Noble did, Daniel Cook, even Lux and Pierre went to the gym on occasion.
Even Dr. Caligare had just shaken his head when he’d examined Blue, stymied at the sheer size of him. The Doctor hadn’t had any recommendations, other than a pure blood diet - but Nora had instinctively known exactly what would work with his ‘oddly different but just as immortal as any vampire’ body.
Blue would have liked to show her MORE of what was happening with him. All he would have had to do was lift up his shirt-but he was far too shy to do that. The flabby folds of adipose that had formerly constituted his midsection were becoming sculpted, his girth not lessening much, but he was shaping up to become a vampire with an unusually massive and quite powerful physique.
‘Kind of like the Hulk,’ he thought to himself. He thought it was great.
But being around Nora was greater. She was brutally honest with herself as well as others. Spunky. Trustworthy. Gorgeous in her own offbeat unique way. And fiercely loyal. He had never known anyone like her.
“Now breathing.” she instructed him, and switched the video back on for the directed breathing part.
As they were inhaling, holding the breath, and exhaling he was stealing glances at Nora. She was neither short nor tall, had a medium build and was very shapely. He wondered what it would feel like to hold her while kissing her, and then blushed at the thought.
He had never kissed a girl. He thought that never having had any experience he probably would do it wrong anyway.
He’d become friendly with some of the other occupants of Fress’s cottage - Carey and his wife Kimbra and Avinash. Carey and Kimbra spent most of their time together in the 3-4 season room add on in the back of the cottage, but he’d had several friendly and informative conversations with ‘Avi’ , the shape shifter and thought he might ask the young man for a few pointers on how to woo Nora.
She was certainly worth wooing. It was a huge deal that she was comfortable with him, accepted him even though he wasn’t your average vampire.
The bigger deal, at least to Blue, was that she was the only female who had ever touched him aside from his own mother. Nora was a touchy feely female energy and was always patting, pushing, mock smacking him, hugging him or slipping her hand companionably into his at unexpected moments.
Blue, although he lack more than a rudimentary education, was an intelligent and analytical young person and noticed that most vamps seemed to enjoy pairing off - almost everyone in the extended family circle that surrounded Fressenda had a significant other: Lux had Pierre, Mitzi had Cass, Carey had Kimbra, Charley had Merilee, Orry had Makenna - it did seem as if Daniel and Fress spent less time with each other lately though. Blue also kept hearing references to a young female vampire named Channing that lived at the Farm with Mitzi and Cass. Jaxon, who was 9 and taking treatments from Dr. Caligare to enhance his growth, was a permanent fixture at the cottage and had adopted Blue as a big brother to play video games with. Blue and Jaxon had an easy companionship, and something in common because Blue was a fat vampire and Jaxon had been twice- bitten at such a tender age that unless a medical intervention of some sort was done he would become a vampire version of Peter Pan-never growing or maturing in spite of his immortal status.
Blue turned his attention back to Nora, who had asked him a question that he, preoccupied with his thoughts, had missed.
“I’m sorry Nora,” he said, meaning it as he looked into her golden eyes. ”I didn’t hear that.”
She patted him on the arm.
“Oh that’s okay. I just wondered if you wanted to ride to the coffee shop with me. I have a craving for orange mocha latte.”
Blue sat up straighter, his interest piqued.
“Sure!” he said, hoping that he sounded more casual about the invitation than he was feeling inside.
“But only if it’s my treat.” He added, trying to sound suave. It was only recently that he had acquired any funds at all. Fress had been offering him lawn care chores to do so that he would have pocket money. Blue had grown up so far off the grid in the mountains of West Virginia that he hadn’t actually even SEEN folding money until he was five years old. A stranger had come to the door of their tipsy two room shack and offered his father money for hunting on the land for a day once. Blue’s father was illiterate but canny and had gotten a princely sum from the out of towners. At first Blue had been glad for the windfall (his mother was particularly happy he remembered, because his father said she could have a new dress.)
But the next day after that he had noticed the body of one of the buck deer abandoned next to his familiar path in the pine forest. He recognized it as ‘Ranger’-a buck he had named because it had come up to him several times when he was hunting, its beautiful and curious eyes taking in all of him, its nose quivering from his strange human smells.
When he looked down he saw that it had been ravaged. It’s magnificent 7 point antlers had been brutally hacked off its head.
Blue had felt as though he’d lost a friend - he didn’t have any friends other than the animals in the forest, so he’d dug a shallow grave and lowered the buck into it, covering its body with soil, leaves and soft green moss. He’d decided right then that money was an evil thing that often rendered consequences beyond what one bargained for to get it.
Pocket money was all he actually needed, since Fress saw that all her boarders had blood to drink and human food and drink also.
“Blue – ok - but you know you don’t have to.” Nora said in a slightly admonishing tone. ”I’ve started working at the bookstore downtown on weekends you know. I have my own money.” She finished, retrieving her Hello Kitty backpack from the study floor. As she bent over her loose fitting bell sleeved light grey yoga top shifted so that he could see the lacey purple bra she was wearing beneath it.
For a moment, as sun filtered through the half closed venetian blinds, they stood closely together just looking at each other. Nora seemed to study Blue’s face, then closing her eyes she leaned forward on her tip toes to compensate for Blue’s height and pressed her lips to his.
Blue could feel a pounding in his chest cavity, and heard blood rushing in his ears. He had no idea what to do, but fortunately nature seemed to take over, and he found his mouth relaxing aro
und her perfect lips, and his tongue taking on a life of its own as it danced with Nora’s tongue, sliding and curling and exploring her mouth.
The kiss came to an end as naturally as it had began. Blue was filled with emotions that he couldn’t name. He said the first thing that came to mind.
“Thank you.” he said, meaning it.
Nora’s eyes were liquid gold as she gazed unflinchingly back at him.
“I wanted to.” She answered, ”I’ve wanted to for a long time Blue. You’re very handsome you know - but I know you don’t REALLY know that. And I LIKE that you’re shy - most vamps think too much of themselves, but you’re different… different in a GOOD way.”
At that point Blue felt strongly that he wanted to take Nora in his arms. He looked at her imploringly and she nodded and suddenly they were embracing and kissing again. This time felt much more comfortable – Blue felt that he was getting the ‘hang of it.”
Another part of his physiology was NOT hanging anymore, though. Blue could feel a distinct stirring in his loins. His ‘soldier’ was ‘standing at attention’- at least that’s the way his father had described it when he was telling Blue about the birds and the bees. His father had also likened women to wild mares that could only be ‘tamed’ by ‘gentling’, i.e., coaxed into sex by soothing and romantic means.
Blue felt his respiration increasing and was relieved when Nora pulled back away from him again. The light in her eyes held his reflection.
“Say Blue,” she said, her voice alluringly soft, ”Let’s go get coffee now. I’ve been thinking for days about how I wanted to tell you how much I like you..
“And now,” she finished smiling widely and giving a shrug with her slight shoulders,
Now I guess you know!”
“You’re so quiet today,” Channing said to Daniel. He could tell she was clenching her hands together in order to keep her “talking” hands in her lap. It seemed as if she had gotten so used to signing when she was mute, that it was difficult for her to realize that she didn’t need to anymore.
Daniel looked up at her as they sat together on a knoll overlooking the stream that ran through the Farm. The knoll was at the end of a small apple orchard, and over their heads bees droned in the heat of the summer sun. They were surrounded on all sides by the aromas of sun baked meadow and the clean smell of the cottonwoods.
“I still can’t believe how quickly your speech came back,” he said in a wondering tone. “Was it just like snapping your fingers-that quick? Or did it take awhile.”
Channing threw her long blonde hair back over her shoulder and smoothed her sundress. Daniel noted that being around Mitzi had influenced her fashion preferences. Where usually she would have been dressing in tomboy style - cargo shorts and a tee, her new life with the Nobles on the Farm called to mind placid bygone days of perhaps a century ago. So lately Channing had taken to dressing accordingly, mostly sundresses, which were much cooler in the summer heat.
“It pretty much came back kind of rapidly on its own after I spoke the first word. Almost like the part of my brain dealing with speech got jump started and started to refire the appropriate neurons. Within a couple of hours I was speaking almost normally. Everyone was overjoyed!”
Daniel looked intently at her, his grey eyes the soft shade of summer rainclouds.
“And what was your first word? Did you know that it was coming or were you just as surprised as everyone else?” He asked.
Channing’s cheeks instantly pinked with color. She seemed hesitatant to answer Daniel, to tell him that it was HIS name that her heart wanted to speak so badly that it opened up her throat to the first words that she’d spoken in months. But she felt too shy to share that particular nugget of information at that moment.
“I will tell you someday, Daniel, I promise. Just not today.” She finished.
“Good enough!” He said, gazing at her loveliness, wondering how old she really was (16? 17?) and wondering if he were secretly a pedophile, to be so completely drawn to someone so young. He’d heard the stories about her gang rape and Turnings. If they were even HALF true the fragile female sitting cross - legged on the soft grass so casually close to him was possibly the bravest and most beautiful creature he’d ever known.
“So what’s going on Daniel?” Channing asked quietly. She knew instinctively that Daniel kept most of his feeling inside of him, and because of that he was an enigma to many of their circle of acquaintances. He had a dry sense of humor and was one of the few vamps that could counter some of Castor Nobles offhanded remarks. She knew he had lots of tattoos and she’d heard that he used to have multiple piercings.
And she knew that he was handsome in an edgy ‘bad boy’ way that made her heart palpitate and piqued her young lust.
Daniel picked a long blade of grass and chewed on the end of it for a few moments. When at last she concluded that she should withdraw the question and leave him to his privacy, he began to speak.
“Channing I’m worried about my mother, Dendra. I know you’ve met her in passing a few times, or seen her at parties out here. I’m not just here for a visit today… I asked Mitzi if I could move in for awhile.
My mom and Dad divorced when I was 13 - about the same time Charley’s dad was killed by that semi. It was ugly divorce - lots of fighting, name calling - my Dad cheated on my mom with his secretary, someone a lot younger than my mother, and she was devastated.
I got to hear it all – from BOTH sides. When I was with my Dad he told me terrible things about my mom. When I was with my mom she cried and cried and cried… if it hadn’t been for Mitzi she might have taken her own life. Sometimes she was so depressed she wouldn’t leave her room.
I was angry at my father, basically blamed him for all of it. I felt like I had to make up for his not being around - so half the time I was trying to cheer my mom up, do things with her, remind her that she still had ME. After awhile she seemed to adjust, and we had a new routine that didn’t include much contact from my dad, who was busy knocking up his secretary with a lot of stepsiblings that I refused to have anything to do with. As far as I was concerned he was dead to me.
I wanted to numb the fierce rage and pain that I was feeling. For awhile I did the super achiever thing, trying to make my mom proud, trying to show my Dad what a great son he was missing out on. I was a letter man, won sports trophies, stayed at the acme of the honor roll. That was my FIRST ACT:I call it “Daniel Cook: Perfect Son ‘‘
In my second act I became much DARKER… let’s call this one ‘Daniel’s Evil Twin’. I had always been musical and started playing in a garage band, doing drugs, anything you could mention I’ve done-grass, PCP ,MDA, LSD, coke, ecstasy and everything in between: Uppers and downers and Xanax and spice - all of it! I woke up taking drugs and crashed every night taking drugs. I wasn’t careful about anything I did-I totaled two cars and had unprotected sex all the time. I wasn’t yet immortal but you couldn’t tell it from my behavior… I had a death wish-big time.”
As Daniel paused to take a breath, Channing slipped her hand into his as an encouragement, sensing that Daniel had never had a chance to vent about any of his past before. She understood that she was being privy to the innermost core of Daniel, a special audience of one to what had been going on emotionally with the handsome and brooding young man.
Daniel looked down at Channing’s hand in his own larger, masculine one. Their hands looked perfect together, and her touch was soothing: Cool clear water sweeping over his savaged soul.
“Then I ran into Merilee-we’d been an item in High School… she was a wild child also. She was my first lover, and we reconnected and she told me she was a vampire. I thought she was crazy, but I happened to be sober the first time that she demonstrated her impressive skills set… .and the evidence was undeniable. I BEGGED HER to turn me, right then and there. Turning seemed to be the perfect solution to my existence pathos… I would die, but not by my own hand, and be reborn as a new creature with unimaginable powers.
Honestly Channing, it wasn’t what I expected. I thought I’d turn darker and wicked, and more of a libertine, but being transformed actually sobered me up in a sense. I had all these mentors from the Vampire Network that set me straight on both the privileges and the responsibilities of being a modern day vampire. I realized that I had to live for myself, not in reaction to the circumstances of my past. I enjoyed every minute of it.
I didn’t count on it having such a profound effect on my mother.
Although I’d cleaned up my act, returned to school, got a professional daytime gig-she seemed to sense the changes in me immediately and be confused by them. She got really emotional and clingy. One night-it happened to be the same night that I asked Fressenda to Twice-Turn me; she caught us in bed together and freaked out. I had to stun her to calm her down, but it was like a part of her had gotten confirmation of what I’d become… and I ended up confessing to her.
Fast forward a little to my mom deciding that she would JOIN me in immortality. Great, right?
WRONG. SO VERY WRONG.”
Daniels head dropped down and his hair covered his handsome face. Channing squeezed his hand slightly for reassurance, somehow sensing the enormity of what he was about to reveal to her and her alone.
Daniel was shocked to realize that he’d managed to get to that point in his narrative, and in his mind there was no going back.
For the next few seconds he was mute. Then slowly he brushed back the defensive layers that had surrounded the act he was about to describe, an act that had wounded both his psyche and soul and engendered a deep sense of self-loathing. As he did so, the wound that he had kept hidden from the world began, to his richest horror, to open and bleed.
Between ragged, hoarsely gasping sobs he told Channing what he had done.
“My mom INSISTED that I be the one to Turn her - I told her it seemed wrong, BEGGED her to let me consult with Cass or Lux. She told me that if I didn’t turn her she would kill herself right then and there. She said other things too - terrible, seductive things I can’t repeat to you now though they echo in my head. She told me she’d often thought that I should take my fathers place and husband her. She begged me to make love to her - my OWN mother - said she wouldn’t mind the fanging so much if I did-but I refused. I couldn’t take any more… I pushed her against the wall of my bedroom and sunk my fangs into her neck, letting my venom course through her veins, just to shut her up… to stop the torture… the torture that was the twisted way in which she loved her own son!”