Pax Imperia (The Redemption Trilogy)

by Mike Smith

  Tearing his gaze away from Sofia, Jon looked at the Senator beside her, who had spent most of the dinner finding good reasons to touch, stroke or just goddam fondle her. Jon realised he needed to distract himself when he found himself staring at the knife in his hand. Instead of using it to cut his food, he was busy visualising how he would use it to impale the Senator’s constantly wandering hands. After that he decided not to look up from his plate, but to focus on his food. Not that he had a clue what many of the dishes actually contained.

  All-in-all Jon was relieved when the meal was finally finished, even though the tension between the two of them had gone unnoticed by the rest of the table, with the exception of Sarah, who kept trying to catch his eye, shooting him quizzical glances now and then. After the remains of the meal had finally been cleared away the band struck up a tune and slowly, in pairs, the couples drifted out from the dining room back into the ballroom, until only the four of them remained. The tension between them was so thick not even the knife Jon was contemplating stabbing the Senator with could cut through it.

  *****

  “Senator, would you care to dance?” The voice broke through the heavy silence at the table. Unfortunately the question did not originate from Jon, who was busy praying the floor would open and swallow him whole.

  Sofia quickly glanced across the table at Jon, who was busily staring at a flower arrangement on the table, the tension in his shoulders clearly recognisable to anybody who knew him as well as she did. She had been taken aback at the sight of him because of all the venues where she thought they might meet this ball must surely have been the most unlikely. However, it was his demeanour that truly surprised her. For Jon had always radiated energy and a quiet self-confidence everybody around him immediately noticed, but no longer. From his worn expression, lifeless eyes and slumped shoulders, he looked like a man tired beyond his years. Totally defeated. If she had not known it was only three years since she had last seen him, she would guess he had aged at least a decade. She had been about to comment on it, then she noticed the beautiful woman at his side. She was obviously much younger than Jon, and so radiantly lovely Sofia noticed, with some irritation, the way her own partner for the evening allowed his gaze to linger on her. All the old hurt and pain of Jon’s sudden betrayal and abrupt departure had come flooding back and she had to force herself to remain civil to him, although she had not totally succeeded.

  While she had been planning on making an early exit after the meal, the offer to dance had taken her by surprise and she found herself agreeing before even giving it a second thought. As she departed with her date, her last glimpse of Jon was of the woman next to him touching his arm and whispering something into his ear. Sofia wondered why that last image bothered her so.

  *****

  “Jon,” Sarah said, touching him lightly on the arm to gain his attention. “While everybody is occupied with the ball I need to go and complete my assignment. Are you going to be okay here by yourself?” she added worriedly, as he had hardly said a word since the arrival of the last couple at their table.

  She had no idea who they were, but something about them had shaken Jon badly. She wondered if it was this event her uncle had alluded to before their departure. He had dropped hints that something was going to happen during the ball, although he had not been more specific, simply insisting he wanted to know the full details upon her return. She assumed this was to be some kind of joke, as her uncle had been smiling at the time, the amusement evident in his expression. Yet she believed her uncle truly liked Jon, so why he would wish to inflict such unhappiness on the man, she had no idea. She watched him watching the couple as they made their way to the dance floor. Jon looked away, pain and hurt clearly evident in his expression, when the man took the woman into his arms. Sarah continued to watch for a few moments longer, observing the way the other woman stood stiffly, trying to move back an inch to make some space between them. Sarah had been in enough similar situations to recognise she was far from happy in his embrace.

  Turning back to Jon, Sarah was tempted, just for an instant, to abandon the whole idea of their trip and just stay and keep him company. For, indeed, Jon cut a lonely figure, seated at the table with all the remaining couples having long since abandoned the dining hall for the dance floor. “Jon?” she asked again, hesitantly, as he had still not replied to her earlier question.

  “You go,” the voice was barely a whisper, as if coming from a great distance. “I will be fine here, by myself. It is hardly the first time that I have been in this position. You would think that by now I would have even got used to it.”

  Sarah’s heart lurched at the pain in his voice and, with sudden insight, she understood her uncle’s final warning to her.

  “I don’t want you getting too close to the Commander. You stay away from him, you hear? And by the Maker, whatever you do, don’t go falling in love with him.”

  At the time she had thought it a strange warning about a man that she had never met and was unlikely to ever see again after this assignment was over. However, seeing him look so lost and forlorn, she could understand how easy it would be to do so. But what was stranger was her uncle’s parting comment, one she was sure she had not meant to overhear, but her sensitive ears had picked up nonetheless.

  “That way you’ll be the only person in the family that doesn't.”

  *****

  Realising he could not spend the rest of his evening drowning in self-pity, Jon looked up into Sarah’s concerned gaze and tried to reassure her. “Honestly I will be fine. You go on ahead. Do you want me to accompany you?” He hoped this would quickly dismiss any lingering concerns she might have had about him, as they had had this argument many times over on the Eternal Light while travelling to Eden Prime.

  “I have told you and my uncle repeatedly, I am a big girl now and can look after myself. I don’t need you both holding my hand.”

  “At least let me make a few calls and—”

  “No,” Sarah interrupted firmly. “I must do this by myself.”

  “Very well,” Jon sighed. He had tried his best to explain to the headstrong woman, but she didn’t want to listen. “If you need my help, call me. You have my personal code.”

  “And you will come running, like my white knight to rescue the fair damsel in distress?” Sarah enquired, with a grin to show she was only teasing him.

  Jon pointed at the white imperial navy uniform he wore and the sword strapped to his waist. “Of course,” he replied in an equally teasing tone. “After all I am already dressed for the part.”

  Sarah’s silvery laugh raised his spirits for a moment, but his good mood quickly evaporated as he spied Sofia and her partner obviously enjoying themselves on the dance floor. Ignoring his earlier promise about not having any more to drink, he poured himself a glass of wine, grimacing at the tart taste of it, and still glancing at the couple from time to time.

  He had been telling Sarah the truth when he said his role as the silent observer was not new to him. How many similar official events had he presided over, observing Sofia and whoever had taken her fancy that evening dancing the night away, while standing at her father’s side? What was worse was that he had nobody to blame but himself.

  He glared at the couple with growing anger as he noticed Sofia’s dancing partner slip his hands down her narrow waist, resting them on her hips for a moment before casually slipping them around to clasp her bottom and pull her even closer to him.

  Jon didn’t move, didn’t even realise that he was holding his breath until, at a loud crack, his concentration shattered and was drawn to the now broken crystal wine glass in his grasp. Dropping the glass into his untouched soup bowl, he rose unsteadily to his feet. As the Praetorian Commander he had no other option but to stare at Sofia dancing with whomever she chose, but that chapter of his life was over. At least now he no longer had to sit idly by and watch.

  *****

  Out of the corner of her eye Sofia looked at the empty table wh
ere only moments before Jon had been seated, all alone. He had obviously now departed for the evening, and without even saying goodbye. She was surprised to see he had left alone, as his date had abandoned him several minutes earlier. She wondered who was the greater fool; Jon’s date for leaving such a man, or her for continuing to dance with the lecherous man with the wandering hands. She had lost count of how many times she had to prise them away, as they constantly drifted lower. Anyway, now that Jon had left she had little reason to stay. Sofia wondered whether, if she left now, she would be able to catch up to him. However, that plan was quickly abandoned when she observed a figure tapping her dance partner on the shoulder and a familiar voice politely enquiring whether he could cut in on the dance.

  Sofia turned her head slightly and came face to face with Jon, barely a foot away from them, his eyes sparkling mischievously. She quickly glanced back at her dance partner, who was staring at Jon with barely concealed anger. Suddenly his expression changed, the anger dropped away as his face turned pale and he uttered a brief whimper of pain. Sofia followed the hand that was casually draped across his shoulder, back to its owner—Jon.

  “Senator, you don’t have any objection? We won’t be long,” he added with forced pleasantry. “I’ll return her to you. Tomorrow, perhaps?” With that Jon retracted his hand and released the trapped nerve. The Senator took a few hurried steps away, and then disappeared into the crowd. Meanwhile Jon casually stepped into the recently vacated space, taking up the dance without missing a step. He pulled her to him, his grip firm but gentle as he twirled her around once, before bringing her close and grasping her hand against his chest.

  “Jon,” Sofia admonished. “That was incredibly rude.”

  “So was his bad case of wandering hands,” he replied darkly.

  “I was dealing with it. I don’t need you to rescue me whenever it takes your fancy,” she bristled.

  “I am perfectly aware that you can take care of yourself and, as much as I would have enjoyed watching you break the Senator’s jaw, I don’t think it would have done much for your hard-earned reputation now, would it?”

  Sofia fell silent. Jon was correct that any action she took would have just created a scene and she could do without that added complication. To avoid an argument, she simply nodded her head in agreement. “Now that your date has abandoned you for the evening, you thought you would find your entertainment elsewhere tonight?” Sofia asked bitterly, astonished at the malice in her own voice.

  “She had other plans,” Jon replied unperturbed.

  “As do I,” Sofia insisted spitefully, trying futilely to escape from his grip, as he held her tighter in his arms. She had forgotten how strong he was.

  “Postpone them,” Jon snapped, a hint of anger finally clouding his own expression for the first time that evening.

  “If you don’t let me go, I’ll scream.”

  “To protect your reputation I would obviously have to interrupt you.”

  “Oh? And may I ask how will you do that?”

  “I’ll have to find something else to occupy your mouth with, and most likely I will be forced to kiss you, long and deeply,” Jon replied cheerfully. “This will also cause a scene, but at least this one will be far more pleasurable, for me at least. So do let me know if you still have any plans to go ahead and scream.”

  Sofia meanwhile just stared at him in disbelief, before her gaze fell to his lips and she hurriedly closed her mouth, two pink spots appearing on her otherwise pale cheeks.

  “If I knew that was all it was going to take to keep you quiet, I would have threatened to kiss you many years ago,” Jon laughed.

  “That would have definitely caused a scene,” Sofia replied, trying to suppress a smile of her own.

  “Indeed, and probably would have resulted in my death at the hands of your father,” Jon responded. “Did I mention how beautiful you look tonight?” he complimented her. “It’s the first time that I have seen you smile all evening. I suppose I should also congratulate you on your elevation to the Senate. Your father would have been so proud of you,” he added, after a noticeable hesitation.

  Sofia, meanwhile, was reminded of how much she enjoyed his company and how much she missed their light teasing. For the first time in a long while she found herself relaxing in another man’s company, resting her head on his chest as he held her. His breath whispered over her ear as they gently swayed to the music.

  “I miss him you know,” she confessed sadly. “I still wake up some mornings thinking of something that I wanted to tell him, then I remember he is no longer here.” She closed her eyes and enjoyed being in Jon’s arms. His hand moved up and down her back, warm and gentle, and he dipped his head to press his face against her shoulder, as she heard him draw in a long breath.

  “I know what you mean,” he agreed. “I also find myself waking in the morning, finding something missing.” Failing to mention it was not her father he woke up yearning for most mornings, but rather wondering what Sofia was doing that day, whether she was happy or sad. Wondering if she ever spared him a thought.

  However, he did not want to ruin the moment by reopening old wounds and they continued to dance, as Sofia moved her arms up to wrap them around his neck. Their dance was probably more intimate than most on the floor, but he didn't care, pressing his cheek against hers, closing his eyes and enjoying the feel of her in his arms. He pretended that it was just the two of them, alone, swaying softly to the music, and that she belonged to him and nobody else.

  It was a pleasant daydream and one that he had often indulged in.

  *****

  Sarah stopped at the threshold of the corridor, turning back to face the dining room one last time to check on Jon, expecting him to still be sitting there, alone. However, he was gone and the table was now deserted. Guessing he had retired early for the night, Sarah was about to turn around and resume her assignment when she spotted something from the corner of her eye.

  She could only gasp in surprise as she observed Jon in the middle of the dance floor, whispering something to the auburn haired woman who had sat opposite him during the meal. The one he had been so closely observing prior to her departure. Her partner was now no longer in sight and the woman smiled at something that Jon had said. A few moments later she was resting her head against his chest, as naturally as if it had always belonged there. The two of them, now in a tight embrace, swayed gently to the music. The couple barely moved, and were oblivious to the glances from the other guests dancing around them. Finally the pair slowly came to a halt, unaware of everything and everyone around them.

  Sarah was surprised at the sudden pang of jealously she felt in her chest, although she could hardly stake a claim to the Commander. After all, he had refused all of her advances. She was unsure why her uncle had even suggested she attempt to seduce Jon, and why he had been convinced Jon would refuse her, suggesting that the idea would make the Commander distinctly uncomfortable.

  Suddenly, like a door opening in her mind, she recognised the name of the Senator with whom Jon was dancing. While the family name of Aurelius was not uncommon, it was only while watching the pair Sarah realised this must be the daughter of the late Emperor, Marcus Aurelius. No wonder Jon had recognised her. While Sarah was busy with her studies at the Academy, she had heard the story of their escape and their subsequent flight together across half the Imperium to Eden Prime. Many of the news data-nets at the time had remarked at the miraculous escape, but watching the two together she realised it was nothing of the sort. For Sarah could clearly see, in the way Jon unabashedly stared at this woman, the love he held for her. Jon would never have allowed any harm to befall her, not while she was under his protection.

  As it became obvious the couple were about to kiss she turned away, not wishing to intrude on such a private moment, although they already had most of the Senate as keen observers. While everybody else was too busy surreptitiously observing the couple, Sarah slipped out of the door and made her way to the smal
l apartment she shared with Jon.

  *****

  As Jon’s eyes slowly opened, the first thing he saw was Sofia staring steadily back at him, her eyes open wide in helpless yearning and for a moment in time everything seemed to come to a standstill, and he could not tear his gaze away from her. He bent his head and paused just above her mouth so that their breath mingled. She, in turn, licked her lips, as if in invitation for a kiss, making no move to back away. He could feel her warm breath and smell the scent of her hair, and he wondered how he had ever lasted so long without her touch. Unfortunately, it was at that moment time decided to resume its normal pace, and the music and couples twirling around them intruded once again into their own private world. Sofia also remembered where they were and pulled away, right out of his embrace, leaving him feeling cold and bereft.

  “Sofia wait,” he called after her rapidly retreating figure, hurrying in a desperate attempt to catch up with her before he lost her all together, for the second time in his life.

  Fortunately she had not managed to get far before he caught up and grabbed her by the arm to stop her escape. She spun around to face him once again, eyes flashing with anger.

  “Leave me alone. Have you not hurt me enough already? Did you think you were just going to waltz back into my life? You might not have noticed, but I have my own life now. I’m no longer that naïve girl you pulled off the Imperial Star. Now leave me alone.”

  Jon took a step back, as if she had just slapped him, but then, with grim determination, pressed ahead anyway. “If you will just give me one minute to explain?”

  “Explain how you tripped and accidently stuck your tongue down that woman’s throat? How you had dropped something and were innocently looking for it up her skirt!” Sofia cried out, drawing more than one astonished gaze from the guests in the corridor.