by K. M. Liss
“So, what is the plan?”
“She's going into hospital for the op in two weeks. Laser surgery.”
“That's so good to hear. So you can breathe a sigh of relief now, can't you?” I brush the hair from his face and kiss his cheek.
“I will, when it's all over.”
I give him another longer kiss. “Want a drink?” He seems really uptight.
“No...just hold me.”
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Just a little world-weary. My emotional side has taken a bashing the last week or so.”
“A good night's sleep might help,” I remind him our nights tend to be very sleepless.
“I'm not physically tired, Kate. It's my head, that's all, got a lot going on in there. Work, family, us...”
“I hope I'm not adding to your mountain of worries,” I joke.
“Not to my worries, no. I'm mentally organizing things. Trying to work out when the hell I'm gonna see you next.”
“I can come to you, after Vegas. In a few days Kelsey and Brendan go back to Texas, and then I'm all yours.”
“Who are Kelsey and Brendan?”
I realize I haven't told him much about my visit. We've been rather preoccupied with each other and his family. I'll fill him in later. Not all the details obviously, but as much as he needs to know.
“They're Harry's kids. Twenty-five-year-old twins, visiting from Austin.”
He hugs me tighter. “If you can drag yourself away from your mom after that, that'll be great.”
“Drag myself away? Are you kidding? Just you try and stop me.” I laugh.
HIM
I sit on the plane New York bound. It's seven o’clock Wednesday morning.
I look at the time as I play the damned annoying and highly addictive Flappy Bird game on my iPhone.
She should be well over half way now.
Letting her go was so hard. It's like she's a part of me and I had to rip her out. And it was so damn painful. I can still see her tearful face in my mind, as she went through the security gate and disappeared out of sight. My stomach churns at the loss of her presence, every time I think of her, which is all the fucking time it seems.
I spent last night at Mom's, in my old room. We had a really cool night together. A quick meal after which we dropped Kate off, and a bottle of wine when we got back. I'm all set to return in eleven days with Kate, the day before Mom has her op. She's cheerful and optimistic and I'm keeping myself positive for her. I'm also keeping my fingers crossed that nothing goes wrong.
In general, I'm much more relaxed about things now, and although I miss Kate already, it's only a few days until I see her again.
I'm dying to show her off to my friends, and to everyone at work.
Sometimes I can't believe this is me. Someone else has invaded my body. One I don't recognize at all. I suppose it'll take a while to sink in.
The new me.
Newly reconciled with all my family. Even Issy and Lola are coming round now that they see Mom and me getting on well and making a real effort to be the family we should always have been.
Newly loved up. She makes my heart flip and I'm so into her I'm almost blind to everyone else. She makes me feel so good I can't imagine being happy with what I felt like before. And I wasn't. I was empty and lonely, basically. A fucked-up idiot trawling bars for hook-ups. No conscience, no permanence, no purpose. No love.
I've been transformed by love, for Kate, and for my family. And I think I'm damn close to being what I wanted to be.
God, it's been a crazy fucking fortnight.
I'm getting my plans mentally finalized as we approach New York, almost an hour early. I have my list of things to do. I have developed a workable plan of action to extricate myself from the day to day. It'll be a surprise for Kate and some other people as well. Despite what I said to Kate, I'm not really needed here at all, but there are things that need doing establishing that fact first.
We land with a hard bump and a swerve on the runway. That kind of less-than-perfect landing would have made me break out in a heart-pounding sweat and given me a shocking head rush in the past. But not any more.
Jesus, I really am a completely new me. I actually enjoyed that. It was kinda thrilling.
I smile all over my face.
~ * ~
I'm going straight into the office from the airport.
I've text Kate a couple of times but I'm guessing she's still asleep because she hasn't answered me yet. Her cell's unreachable, switched off, or out of battery.
But I have got her -I've landed, so exhausted, call you when I wake up. Love you forever xxxx text at least.
I'm exhausted too, but if I can get through the next couple of hours I can go home and sleep for a long stretch without worrying about a thing.
After a boring and very congested taxi ride downtown, I struggle wearily through the door of AAG and raise my hand at hot promo girl Rhonda who's taking her turn on reception.
“Aaron...so nice to have you back!”
“It's only for a few hours, I'm jet lagged and running on empty, can't stop or I'll drop.” I smile at her as I pass by and walk through to my office and startle Karen, who's busily painting her nails at her desk outside.
“I see, is this what you get up to when I'm away?” I laugh “Playing beauty parlor?”
“No...I thought I'd make the most of my five-minute break, as I've been run off my damn feet for two weeks,” she says testily.
“Karen, I'm only joking. You're a treasure. Paint your nails all day, sweetheart.”
She smiles at me enthusiastically. “I'm really pleased to see you.”
I get a careful hands-free hug, because the nail polish is still drying.
“I won't be in the office for long. I've got an announcement to make, then I'm off home to bed.”
“What announcement?”
“Get Jack in here will you.”
“Aaron, you're worrying me.”
“Hey, it's good news, K, don't fret.”
He enters my office, closing the door, and strides up to my desk.
“Hey, bro. How did it all go?”
“You wouldn't believe me if I told you.”
“Try me.”
“In short, after what seemed like a world tour on steroids, I now have a life. Outside of work. One I want to live.”
“You have a life? And what...you didn't have one before...?”
“Something like that.”
“Right, well this is all very deep, coming from you. Tell me more.”
“This may come as a bit of a shock, Jack, but I'm giving you my job. If you want it, that is?”
He laughs, nervously. “What? Fuck me, Aaron!”
“I'll pass on that, bud.”
“You know, for a mad, hilarious second there I imagined you told me you were giving me your job?”
His face is as white as a sheet. It's kinda amusing, but I try not to laugh at him.
“I'm taking very early retirement. The company shares will be redistributed at no cost to you. I'll keep half for myself if you don't mind; you'll own twenty percent; Karen and Ed will have fifteen percent each. You are now the managing director, Jack.”
“I don't get it, Aaron. Have you had a breakdown or something? You love your job, what the fuck are you doing?”
“What am I doing? It's called taking a backseat. I'll still be around. In the recording studio, and out there looking for new rising stars and all that stuff. But I want to spend more time with the people I love. I can afford to do that.”
“Ha ha...this has gotta be a joke, right?”
“I've never been more deadly serious. I've spent a lot of time building this company over the years, put my heart and soul into it, but lately I've come to realize you can all manage it very well without my help or interference. I'm not really needed here any more.”
“So, I'm really running it. The whole company?”
“Yep, and you're more than capable, I'
m sure you'll do a great job. You're the CEO...the MD, whatever you want to call yourself. Sort out responsibilities between the three of you. Hire some more staff to support your weaknesses, if you feel that's necessary. I've got new plans of my own. I've another star in the making and she can't sing a note in tune, to save her life.”
“She wouldn't be called Kate, would she?”
“She's actually Katrina. But yeah, it's Kate.”
“So what are you gonna do with her?”
“Market her non-singing talent, spread the news.”
“As in—,”
“Here for starters. With Ed and our team, but I haven't discussed it properly with her yet, so I'm not gonna say.”
He huffs out a long sigh.
“Well anyway, bud...Jesus, I don't know whether I'm hanging or ecstatic.”
“Let’s share the news, shall we, and then I'll set up a power of attorney until everything is legally finalized.” I pick up the desk phone and call Karen and then Ed.
I smile at Jack. He grins back, from ear to ear, regaining his composure, the color returning to his cheeks.
Karen and Ed arrive and take a seat. I look at the two other people I rely on so much with a surge of happiness for them. It feels so good to do this. Give them a step up in life. Their own destiny in their hands. They are sitting expectantly in front of me as I deliver my news. “Right, this is a quick meet and I'll get straight to the point, guys...”
HER
I've finally landed. I'm so achy and exhausted. The plane journey was really turbulent and that didn't help much. It's such a long journey. Nearly sixteen hours. I send Aaron a quick text. I know he's en route to New York but he'll get it as soon as he lands.
I make my way through the queues mindlessly and finally come through to the arrivals area. I look for him. Brendan's picking me up as Mom and Harry are busy with the party.
“Kate! Over here,” he calls out and I rush up to him, hugging him across the barrier.
“Hi, Bren.”
“You look good,” he says placing a sweet kiss on my cheek.
“You too,” I reply, pulling away.
I make my way to the end of the barrier and he picks up my case as we head off to the parking lot.
We get in the car and set off, chatting about things...what he's been up to, a couple of movies, one bad, drunken night out with his pal. Then the conversation comes around to me.
“So, how was your sick friend?” He looks at me briefly.
“Not so sick. We're back on now. Aaron and me. Together again. Seriously.”
I look at him and his face drops with disappointment. His chest moves up and down harshly with his breathing. He stares ahead.
“I so didn't wanna hear that.”
“Oh come on, we're still great friends, aren't we?” I punch his arm, good-naturedly, trying to cheer him up and lighten the sudden downturn in mood.
“Friends? Well yeah, I suppose we are, but that's not how I really feel about you. I want you, Kate. I've really missed you. You've got to me, like...really got to me.”
“Brendan, please don't. Aaron aside, we're not going be anything more than friends. We're almost family. Let's keep it that way. Can't you see the problems it could cause in the future if it all went wrong? It's not gonna happen, okay?”
“I hope I can change your mind about that, and pray Aaron and you split again,” he says harshly.
Obviously he doesn't care about potential problems.
He's silent as we hit the main freeway, heading toward Summerlin. The heated breeze blows through my hair as we speed along in his convertible. It might have been a pleasant sensation and a very enjoyable ride under other circumstances. But I'm feeling guilty about him. I really thought he was up for some simple bedroom fun, but it seems he had more than that in mind.
I'm not sure what to say. So I don't. I sit stewing in my thoughts.
He turns the radio on to fill the cool silence and Rihanna blares out. California King. It's a beautiful ballad. I'm singing it loudly in my head. Getting into it, letting it take me out of my guilt trip.
The next second, my eyes widen in horror. A truck bursts through the central reservation and Bren swerves to avoid a head-on collision. We're shunted sideways, out of control and hitting another car, careering off its side and heading for the side barrier at deadly fast speed.
The squeal of brakes. The burning stench of burning rubber. The loud pounding of my heart.
“GOD HELP ME,” I scream in terror.
I think I'm going to die.
“KATE!” He yells as his arm thrusts against my stomach holding me back in the seat, protectively. It all happens in slow motion. My hands fly up to my face to protect and brace myself for the crash, the airbag exploding in my face is we slam into the barrier so, so hard. Everything crumbles and compacts around me. There's crunching, screeching noises, and the smell of gasoline rises in the air. Something horrendously painful hits my ribs, knee, and ankle, and I scream in agony. Glass, plastic, and metal shatters all around, burning and slicing at my arms and head. Everything hurts so much I just can't bear it.
I'm flung around like a rag doll into the airbag as something smacks into us sideways and from the rear at the same time. The jolt of the final impact throws my head forward and the bridge of my nose and forehead smash against my plaster cast with a massive, nauseating thump. I taste and smell blood.
I say goodbye to my life, to him, my sweetest love. To everything I know in this world, in the split second I have left, before it all goes black.
HIM
I'm awoken by my iPhone buzzing. I ignore it, but it starts up again. I look at the number, and I don't know the caller.
“Hello?”
“Aaron?”
“Yeah?”
“It's Kate's mom, Bambi.”
“Oh hi. How's things?” I answer pleasantly, wondering why the hell she's calling me out of the blue.
“Not so good.” My stomach tenses and I sit up in bed, my ears on alert. “Kate's in hospital, she's been in an accident.” She starts to cry. Whimpering little noises. “Sorry, can't speak...hold on....”
I sit in anguish for what seems like forever before a male voice comes on the line. It's a deep Texan voice.
“It's Harry. She's so upset. I had to sit her down with the nurse.”
“What the hell's happened to Kate?” I plead in a loud voice. My heart's about to stop with fear.
Please, please... don't tell me she's dead.
I can't bear the thought.
He takes a deep breath.
“They had a crash. Bren and her, on the freeway a few miles away. She's unconscious, has some broken bones, severe internal bruising, and she’s lost a lot of blood through her head and arm wounds. But she's stable and as far as we know, comfortable, and not in any pain. But the doctors don't know when she's gonna wake up. Bren got off lightly. Sprained his wrist, his ankle, some minor cuts and bruises. That's all. A truck came through the central barrier and they hit the freeway wall trying to avoid it. His car was compacted on the passenger side and the emergency team had to cut her out. She was lucky to survive it, Aaron. Really lucky. It was a multiple pile up and on the news. Two people died.”
I'm relieved beyond words that she's not dead, but I feel so sick for her. My head swims with worry about her condition and my stomach is churning violently. Bile rises up my throat. I swallow it down.
“Oh sweet Jesus...Look, I'm coming to Vegas right away. Which hospital is she in?”
I get up and rush into the living room to grab a piece of paper and write down the details with a shaking hand.
“I guess we'll see you then, Aaron. I'll let you know if there's any news, okay?”
“Yeah, thanks, Harry. Be there as soon as I can.” I tap end call and take a deep breath.
I think about calling Karen, to get me on a flight, but I don't want to bother her, as technically, she's no longer my PA. And neither do I want to talk to anyone, about anythi
ng. I'm too worried. I open my laptop and get on the net, reserving an Upper Class seat on the next Virgin flight to Vegas, and then I pack. I take a full size suitcase, stuffed with everything I can fit in. I don't know how long I'll be there.
~ * ~
Could the journey take any longer than this? It's torture, absolute fucking torture.
I'm sitting in a cab, crawling along, stuck in the middle of a freeway traffic backup, en route to the hospital.
Harry has text me with news that there's no change. She's still out. Unconscious.
I tap my leg impatiently with my fingertips as we finally pull into the hospital.
“Where d'you wanna be dropped, pal?” the cabbie asks.
“Here's fine, stop here,” I reply.
I need to get out of this fucking cab because I wanna scream with frustration.
I thrust a handful of twenty-dollar bills at the driver and get out, opening the trunk and removing my case. Then I race off to reception.
“Trauma Unit?” I bark at the receptionist.
“Third corridor on the right, second door on the left,” she replies pleasantly, pointing, and I rush off forgetting to say thank you.
I'm outside the door and taking a deep breath for courage.
Finally composed, I go inside the trauma unit. The nurse station is immediately ahead.
I ask for Kate.
“Are you close family?” she asks.
“Yeah, I'm her fiancé,” I exaggerate, just in case she won't let me in.
“Right, well she's fourth room down, over there. Someone's with her at the moment. We only allow one visitor at the bedside, okay?”
“Sure and thanks.”
I walk along the corridor with rapidly growing tension.
Jesus fucking Christ, could I feel any sicker?
I'm petrified and at the same time so desperate to see her.
I push open the door and all the breath rushes from my body.
I gasp in shock at the sight before me.
Nothing could have prepared me for this.