Game of Survival

by T R Tells

  “What makes you think that?” Leonard defensively said, he held his clothes balled up in his hands and followed Thea around the room in nothing but his undergarments.

  “It is exactly as I said,” Thea sighed, she stood by her closet and crossed her arms. “We’re simply from two different worlds. What happens if you tell your fellow Kingsland Guards, you’re in love with a whore? Can you handle that ridicule? Or, gods forbid, the King. I will not die for you and I know damn sure you won’t die for me or rid yourself of any of your possessions.”

  Leonard pressed his lips together and gulped. He knew the consequences and several men had told him to love only with his penis, never his heart, but there was something about Thea that made him feel something. Darkness in the bright world that he wanted to fix.

  “I can handle the mocking, and the King won’t outright kill me. My uncle is the general and he will vouch for me. I am his only nephew, after all.”

  Thea huffed and ran her fingers through her thick and knotted hair. She couldn’t admit that she felt something for Leo, even a little, he bought her gifts and tipped very well. She knew that as a whore, she would never be able to live a “wholesome life”.

  “I can see it in your eyes, Leo, you aren’t hard to read. You think that I’m a conquest that you can change me because this is a challenge?” Thea questioned him.

  “Since you’re such a big man, let us see if you can handle the baggage I have acquired since I was eight years old. Are you ready?” Thea grinned, but there was no amount of humor in her eyes as she stared at him.

  This should be fun, let him have it. I was growing bored with him. Hel’s voice chimed in the back of her thoughts.

  Yes! Let him have it! Rip him apart! The motherly voice, which had grown twisted over the years, agreed. The other voices murmured in agreement.

  “My sister was taken from me because the king is a gutless worm. I been masqueraded as a boy and then joined up with a group of fellow orphans. I have had visions of my gods, and though I can vaguely remember, I house a demon inside of me – whether you believe all or one of these is up to you….”

  The angry look on his face beginning to melt away replaced with a furrowed brow of confusion and his lips turned into a frown.

  She swallowed and continued to speak.

  “I have been beaten and abused; I have watched, and even beaten, my friends because I was forced to do so. I watched as someone who was like a father to me burn in his home, and I have been raped more times than I can count, which caused me to have a forced period at the age of twelve. I’ve had more abortions than I can think of and I have a secret that I can never spill from my lips, that only my closest friend knows, and on top of all that . . .”

  She stopped and wiped a single tear that fell down her cheek. She went to the closet and opened it. When she opened the door, she heard Leo gasp, and she knew that this had been the nail in the coffin. Inside the closet sat a small little girl with dirty blonde hair looking down at a torn and beaten rag doll. She looked up at Thea with large, bright brown eyes, but Thea was looking at Leo with glassy eyes.

  “I have a daughter. Do you want to be a father to a bastard child? These are all the questions you need to ask yourself, and there’s more, a lot more, but I can’t say anything because the next thing that you might do is order a noose around my neck!” Thea yelled. The shouting made her daughter frown profoundly and wrinkle her face.

  Thea picked up the three-year-old in her arms and bobbed her up and down.

  “And I will not let you take me away from her because this little girl is the only light, I have in this suffering world and I will kill you first before we are separated. Now choose Leonard, and choose wisely, for you won’t get another chance.”

  Leo did not say anything for several moments. He only stared at Thea and the whimpering child as she clung to her mother tightly. He gulped and licked his lips thinking about everything that Thea had said, and though he had deep feelings for her, there were just things that were far too heavy to grasp and marrying a whore with an illegitimate child was something no one could stomach.

  “I would never take you away from your child, Thea,” Leo croaked out, as he slowly chose his words carefully, but Thea could see the answer in his eyes already. There would never be any man that would be able to look her in the eye and look past her darkness.

  There was a knock on the door. Thea and Leo turned their heads to see it open, and a figure stood in the middle of the door.

  “Is everything alright here?” He asked, glaring dangerously at Leo, but Thea sniffed and stepped in front of Leo protectively.

  “Yes, everything is fine Edward.”

  "Well, you sure don't look fine. Did you touch her, asshole? I don't give a rat’s ass if you are a Guard, I'll -"

  "Eddie," Thea hissed and turned to glare at him with bloodshot eyes. “I said everything is fine."

  Eddie clucked his tongue against his teeth and dug his hands into his pockets, before shrugging his shoulder. "Alright, fine. Are you done here, Leonard? You don't want to be late for your guard's meeting."

  "Yes, I'm going," Leo whispered. He bent down and picked up his clothes and began to dig into his pockets, pulling out a brown leather pouch. It jingled as he walked over to Thea while he kept his head down. "This a little over 400 pounds, gold, and silver, maybe a few bronzes. It should cover my time here and for further payments."

  Thea curtly nodded. She took the bag in her fingers. She watched as Leo clutched his things to his chest and walked out the door, Eddie glared at him.

  “Pretentious asshole,” Eddie mumbled before closing the door behind him. “Are you alright?”

  Thea huffed and took in a deep breath. She sat her daughter on the bed, picked up the ragdoll from the floor and handed it to her. She turned to the closet and placed the bag of coins in its hiding area; she would move them when Eddie left.

  “You’re starting to become a pest, Eddie.”

  “And you’re starting to get too slick with calling me that in front of people,” he said and straddled a chair across the bed. He watched as Thea started to strip out of her outfit and he casually looked away to look at the child.

  “So . . . Is that it for your boyfriend?”

  Thea snorted as she removed her underwear and bra, throwing them to the side.

  “Why should you care? But, no, he wasn’t my boyfriend, just my customer.”

  “Who apparently loved you. That’s why he kept requesting specifically you.”

  “Not love, just lust for what I could give him, and he’s a Guard on top of that,” Thea snapped. She walked past Eddie and to her dresser, removing clean clothes from its drawers. “First off, I would never be with a man who associated with a group that kidnapped my sister and thousands of women. Secondly, I would never put Kadence or myself through that.”

  Kadence, her pride and joy, and at one point her mistake. Since the moment she looked at that child for the first time, however, she couldn’t help but love her. She admitted she didn’t know how to be a mother, but she knew how to protect her and that was all a mother needed to do for her child.

  “Okay. Yeah, but he loves you, so he’ll give you anything you want. He’s thinking with his dick. At least, take the man’s money and run. A brothel is no place for a—”

  Thea glared at him, half-naked in nothing but a fresh pair of undergarments. Eddie cleared his throat knowing precisely what she was going to say – they were just children too when everything went to hell.

  “I’m just saying, I don’t want anything to happen to you or Kadda. Is she still mute? That could render a problem, Thea —”

  “No,” Thea said, she faced him and held up her hand. “You don’t get to call her that. Hell, you don’t even get to care about her.”

  Eddie scratched the side of his head and stood up from the chair. He towered over Thea now, and she had to crane her neck up to look at him.

  “She’s my child, why shouldn’t I?”
>
  Thea rolled her eyes and continued to get dressed. “Maybe, because she might not be your daughter? Our flitting around now and then doesn’t make you the father.”

  Thea dressed entirely in black leggings, a long-sleeved shirt with ruffled frills on end, and a sheepskin vest that covered her lower half. She went to slip on brown moccasin boots. She went over to grab Kadence and rested her on the side of her hip.

  “Where are you going?”

  “I need fresh air. Excuse me if I can’t take the smell of pussy and sperm like some of us.” She snapped at him and pushed past him as she opened and walked out the door.

  “You know you were supposed to be on the clock, right? Some guy almost hit Freya,” Eddie yelled and followed Thea out the door.

  “Well, did you let her kill him?” Thea asked. She wasn’t so much concerned for Freya as the girl handled herself quite well.

  “Of course not. With your boyfriend upstairs? That would have been suicide for the business and Flint would have killed us from inside the cells.”

  They walked past the hallways that were covered with emerald green and diamond wallpaper. There were twenty doors on the second floor and another twenty on the third floor. It had taken some years, but the Meretrix seemed to have grown almost overnight.

  “Well, it’s over now. Done deal. Don’t you have somewhere else to be?”

  “Yeah. That’s managing this place and making sure everyone does their job, including you, and you were supposed to watch the girls.”

  Thea stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned around to look at him, holding onto Kadence tightly. “I’m not those girls’ keeper. I’m just a few years older than them, and there are plenty of older women here who can watch them.”

  “Flint just trusts you, that’s all. You’re—”

  “For the love of everything, Eddie if you call me ‘Flint’s girl’ I will cut off your dick myself!” She yelled and stomped away from him, leaving out of the Meretrix.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Thea stepped into the market of Kingsland full of people and carriages. Over the years, businesses had boomed and trade from King’s sister states—Acothien, Pania, and Toneian— had grown exceedingly well. Visits from the countries Wrenada, Ceisa, Isca, and Quilia had also increased, expanding trade.

  The marketplace was now a bustling metropolis and had grown to the point that it had expanded and overtaken some of the surrounding streets. There were so many stalls that at its peak times of day, it was almost painful to maneuver through the streets. Since trade boomed over the years, the wares in the stalls had gotten more exotic, bringing to Kingsland things from the other kingdoms that Thea had never seen. Posted on the sides of buildings throughout the market were wanted posters for a hooded figure called Sicarri.

  As Thea eyed one of the posters, there was a light tug on her hair, and she turned to look at her doe-eyed little girl.

  “What is it Kadda?” Thea asked, kissing her nose. “We’re almost there, you know who we’re going to visit?”

  Kadda slowly nodded and patted her stomach repeatedly. Thea giggled and grinned. “That’s right sweet girl. First, we need to pick up some flowers.”

  ***

  When Thea and Kadda had gotten a few flowers from the florist, they headed toward the empty lot where Jiran had lived and sold fruits in the market. The lot was for sale, but no one wanted to buy it, because of the fire that killed Jiran had started suspiciously as it seemed to have come out of nowhere. No one tried to buy it for fear that it was a curse or a sign. Thea gently placed her hand on the back of her neck, feeling the rough patch of her scar, she squeezed her eyes shut for several moments before opening them and smiled at her inquisitive daughter who stared at her with a tilt of her head.

  “Why don’t you lay these flowers anywhere you want. Alright, Kadda?” The little girl gave a small nod and when Thea set her down, Kadda walked into the middle of the lot.

  Thea looked from left to right, keeping her eyes aware of the city, there weren’t many people in these parts of the market any longer. The expansion had left this area reasonably empty. It only housed a few markets and houses. She was glad for the quiet as she walked into the vacant lot, her mind imagining Jiran’s house briefly.

  She wiped her feet on the invisible rug and looked over to the right where the hearth and pictures of Roma used to sit. She walked over to the imagined perch and reached out her hand to touch nothing, but she could still feel the hard layer of the frame. She let her hand drop and looked at where her daughter was kneeling on the ground, next to the set of yellow carnations they’d brought. Kadda’s back was to Thea, but she could tell that the girl had her hands pressed together close to her face as if she was praying.

  Thea didn’t know if she was praying to Ansem and Kii, but if there was any form of communication, she was glad that her daughter would know—as much Thea could teach her—about her gods. She wanted Kadda to know where their people were from, even if Thea knew not much herself. The thought of Ansem and Kii made her sad as the blue-haired gods had not contacted her in years since that night in the desert. Thea wondered if she had strayed too far from the past, a constant sting from her mark burned at her neck. She didn’t remember much, but she could vaguely remember the hollow and echoing voice speaking from the large black wolf, almost the size of a bear. She did not know who the being was and did not want to risk letting anyone else know.

  She just hoped that the wolf, Fenris, would not lay eyes on her, or her daughter, again.

  Thea pushed all thoughts of the past aside and knelt to the ground. She closed her eyes and began to fantasize of a better life.

  “You’re late again, what kept you this time?” Jiran asked, the corner of his lip twitching as he tried to hold back a smile.

  “Okay, so funny story,” Thea started to say, who was sixteen in the image, but there was a distinct difference from Thea there and the Thea now. First, there was no mark on her neck, and second, she had an air of life surrounding her as she smiled. There wasn’t any negativity or torrent of emotion that was always whirling around her these days.

  Thea didn’t know what ability she was using, but when she went to certain areas and thought about certain people she could easily project images into her head. Yes, Thea knew they were false but it was the only thing that managed to keep her from not succumbing to the darkness – except for Dominya, Maggie, and Kadda.

  “Does that funny story explain why there’s a cat in your arms?” Jiran scolded with his hands on his hips. “Well, you better feed it real quick because we’re about to go to the Citadel—”

  A ringing echoed in her ears, and Thea snapped her eyes open. Kadda sat with her legs apart in front of a hole and a gold box.

  A gold box, Thea’s thoughts echoed. She started to get Deja Vu as she felt the back of her mind tickle her thoughts. Is that-?

  The light and dull ringing of a bell sounded again. Kadda’s was holding the same bell that Jiran had used to open the Citadel's walls.

  ...You’ll know what to do.

  Those were the last words Jiran had said to her before he died. Thea gulped and clumsily walked over to her daughter. She stumbled several times, feeling her heart thump wildly and her breath hitched and heavy.

  “S-sweetie,” Thea called Kadda, who turned at her mother’s call. Thea’s voice cracked as she focused on the rusted bell, the last surviving item of Jiran’s.

  Thea held out her hand. “Can mommy see that?”

  Kadda nodded her tiny head as her small curls fell on her face. She pushed them out of her eyes and handed the bell to Thea, who stared at it for a moment. It was cool to the touch but somehow still had a slight bit of heat to it. Thea was surprised that it still had a ring to it despite the years underground; but then again, it opened a magic wall.

  Thea gripped the bell close to her and stuffed it into her pocket. “Okay, sweet girl, it’s time to go,” she told her daughter. She didn’t want to stay any longer, just in case,
there were lingering eyes around. She still had to be very cautious of her surroundings.

  Before Thea short old woman with white hair peeked from the cloaked hood. Their long porcelain hands stretched toward Thea, and she grasped them without thinking and felt something thin and papery graze her fingers.

  The white-haired woman briefly looked at her. Her eyes were a bright violet and a powerful wave of energy circulated her. Thea shuddered at the strange figure, but she was gone as quickly as she’d appeared. Thea opened her hand to see that a small, rolled up piece of tan papyrus with a red S marked on it: The Sicarri. Quickly, Thea clenched her hand closed and walked with haste through the city streets.

  ***

  The Sicarri were a group of assassins for hire, and the Meretrix, though that was unknown. The Sicarri were swift in the shadows and killed without being seen. They were notorious in Kingsland with wanted posters in every section of the city. The price of capturing a Sicarri, dead or alive, was worth enough to set a person for life, but like Flint always said, “a person’s desire for anger and jealousy will always reign supreme over wealth.”

  Thea detested those who sold out others, innocent or not, no one deserved to die. Thea often questioned the morality of herself and those of Meretrix. Were they really of sound mind and body to pass judgment on someone like a god? It tore Thea apart and she had sworn never to kill anyone, but that day proved to be one of the most terrifying and exhilarating moments of her life.

  The day she killed.

  It was the opening of the Meretrix and Kadda had just been a year old. Thea was fourteen, and at first, she’d had trouble pleasing the men that started to come to the brothel. She often gave them attitude, which made them mad and Flint punished her both with a whip and rape. She would receive beatings and more than once he’d threatened to throw Kadda out onto the streets if Thea didn’t change her attitude.