A Memory Worth Dying For

by Bruce, Joanie

  She gasped and stood with her mouth open.

  “I hope I’ve remembered everything. I had a gallery owner in town order everything you might need. If you can think of anything else, it’s only a phone call away.”

  She turned to stare at the short, crafty man. He must have been sure she could be talked into staying. He pointed toward a door at the back of the large room. Through it she saw a bed with a quilted comforter in patterns of blue and maroon, and just as many windows graced the bedroom wall. Double patio doors identical to the ones in the studio led out to the same balcony.

  “This will be your suite if you decide to stay. I had it decorated with all your old furnishings.” He shrugged and raised a hand listlessly. “I hoped it would help Daniel remember if he saw you in the same setting.”

  Marti’s swallow was dry and hollow. “What if this doesn’t work? What if he marries Veronica in spite of all your effort?”

  Gerald sighed. “Then I will have done my best to correct what I had a part in. If the worst happens and he insists on marrying her, I’m hoping I can persuade him to wait until at least some of his memory returns. But, no matter what happens, we have to try. I have to correct the horrible mistakes I’m guilty of contributing to—for Daniel’s sake . . . and for yours.”

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  “I know you still love him, Marti. I can see it in your eyes. Please think about what I’m asking you to do. You can have the night to think about it if you like. Daniel won’t be back until tomorrow evening. If you decide to leave, you won’t have to see him at all. I’ll understand.”

  He paused and said, “Please pray about it, Marti. I remember when you first got saved how excited you were about living the Christian life. It irritated me then that you never made a decision unless you prayed about it first and knew it was God’s will for you. I understand that feeling now, and that’s all I’m asking. Pray about it, please.”

  He turned toward the door and gestured to the bedroom. “I had Parker put your luggage in your room, and I’ll have him bring you a supper tray if you like. Take all the time you need. You can let me know when you’ve decided. And, Marti . . . I hope you can forgive me in time.”

  Gerald walked out of the room and left her standing in awe. What should she do? She turned and walked to the front of the crystal clear windows to stare at the hazy blue mountains in the distance. Peaceful and serene, this valley had always calmed her spirit, but now the mountains in the distance seemed to mock her and shout the truth.

  How can you stay and meet Daniel when he believes you caused his sister’s death? When his memory returns, he’ll still blame you and send you from this house again.

  Thoughts swirling around her head were overwhelming. There were so many questions begging for answers.

  If she stayed and painted Daniel’s portrait, she would invariably see Veronica. If the beautiful redhead had done as Gerald stated and lied her way into Daniel’s heart, she most definitely would not want Marti around to help bring back his memories. And yet, she knew Daniel would be miserable with Veronica. His personality would be stifled by her manipulative character—for the rest of his life, if they married.

  This line of thought brought her back to Daniel’s caring, loving face. He was too special to be saddled with someone ramrodding him through the rest of his life.

  If she stayed, she risked losing her heart. If she left, she risked Daniel losing his. The choice was unbearable.

  She pulled fresh clothes from her suitcase and entered the bathroom. A beautifully tiled shower was placed immediately across from double sinks nestled in marble countertops. There were more spray nozzles in the walk-in shower than she’d ever seen in her life. Luxury and comfort came to mind as she soaked in the pulsating jets and tried to forget the decision that plagued her mind. The rhythm of the jets pounded her tense muscles, and helped her relax.

  When she stepped back into the bedroom, a tray sat on the desk. Lifting the lid revealed turkey, dressing, sautéed squash, and broccoli casserole. An apple, banana, and fresh slices of pineapple filled a bowl on the side. Beside the fruit sat a small plate that contained a generous slice of chocolate cake.

  She pinched off a piece of the chocolate cake and let it melt on her tongue. Wow! She’d really missed Stella’s cooking. Planning meals for one person was never fun, and she’d skipped meals when her heart wasn’t in the preparations.

  She took her tray onto the balcony and watched the sun set behind the mountain while she ate. The darkness came fast, and before she knew it, the sun’s orange rays had disappeared behind the mountain.

  With a mood of melancholy, she stood at the balcony rails watching the flickering lights on the mountains in the distance. The twinkling lights had a calming effect—almost enough to make her forget the threats.

  Almost.

  The words of the man in the alley popped into her thoughts, but she tamped them down. She would not think about that now—not here.

  Here in this setting, she could feel God’s presence. She wondered if it hurt God when she turned away from Him. How she missed being able to ask for His guidance. She wanted to feel that closeness again—to feel His fellowship and love. How could she make this monumental decision without Him?

  Just this once, she wished she and God were still on speaking terms.

  TWENTY-ONE

  MARTI TURNED OVER IN BED, but dread kept her eyes closed. Something nagged her into believing today was going to be a terrible day. When memory stirred, her eyes popped open. She was staggered with the decision she had to make—go or stay.

  Tossing and turning the night before brought no solutions to the problem, and turning to God was a difficult option. Gerald had told her to seek God’s will, but that seemed impossible. She hadn’t prayed in years. Why would He listen to her now?

  God heard your prayer for help in the car, Marti.

  The voice was not audible, but it felt so close.

  She crawled out of bed and pulled her Bible from the top of the suitcase. Although she’d been a little peeved to find Sandra had tucked it into her suitcase, Marti was happy to have it now. She pulled the Bible to her and felt the warmth of the early morning light as it slid around the thick curtains covering the sliding doors to her balcony. She threw on her robe and opened the drapes. Unlocking the doors, she slid them apart and stepped onto the covered balcony.

  Marti’s grief was heavy. The loss of her family had been hard, but losing faith in God was devastating. She had nowhere to turn for comfort. She hung her head and let the sorrow roll over her shoulders. Then she opened the Bible to the book of Proverbs. Chapter three and verses five and six were verses she memorized after she accepted God into her life. She read the verses aloud quietly.

  “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; Lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

  Placing the Bible on the balcony table, she stood to stare over the edge of the railing.

  Beginning rays of light filtered through trees on the mountain and shot down to the lake in the distance. Shimmers of light flickered across the surface of the water and highlighted green stems of cattails standing at attention in the shallow end of the lake. The morning mist swirled around them as if an invisible hand stirred the lake.

  So peaceful. So serene. It calmed her heart, and she felt her emotions relax for the first time in three years. This place felt like home. She could almost believe God would visit her here. Maybe He brought her here. Could it be God’s will that she had come? Was it His will that she stay?

  She wanted to ask.

  She needed to ask.

  Dear God. I know I quit trusting You years ago. To be honest, I felt like You let me down. I was such a new Christian, and You let those horrible things happen. I’m sorry I turned away from You. Please show me now what Your will is for me. Should I stay and see Daniel? Should I go home and forget him? Show me a sign, please?

  Beethoven�
��s Fur Elise sounded from her room, so she ran inside and unplugged her cell phone from the charger beside the bed. Sandra’s name lit up across the screen. She smiled and opened the flip phone.

  “Hey!”

  “Marti, I’ve been worried sick. Why didn’t you ring last night? I tried to ring your number, but it never connected. I thought maybe there was no phone at your hotel and no cell service up there in the mountains.”

  “I’m sorry, Sandra. I guess I just got caught up in everything. The new cell I bought for the trip was low in battery when I got here, and I’m not staying at a hotel. I planned on using the house phone, but . . . I guess I got sidetracked.” She stepped out onto the balcony and sat down in one of the reclining chairs. “Are you and Wade okay?”

  “We’re fine, love. How about you? Have you seen Daniel yet? And, what do you mean you’re not at a hotel?”

  “I’m staying at the house. When I got here, Gerald begged me to stay here.”

  “He did what?”

  Marti frowned and explained the situation to Sandra.

  A few minutes later, Sandra’s voice blared through the phone again. “He did what?”

  “Shh, Sandra.” Marti glanced fearfully at the men feeding hay to horses inside fences on this side of the barnyard. She stood up and stepped closer to the back of the balcony overlooking the stables below.

  “You heard me. He lied when he said Daniel was dying.”

  Marti explained the long conversation she had with Gerald and what he had asked her to do.

  Sandra’s voice was two octaves higher than normal. “He did what?”

  “Sandra, you’re beginning to sound like someone with a repetitive speech disorder. You heard me. Gerald wants me to pretend I’m here to paint a portrait of Daniel so he’ll realize he’s not in . . .” Marti stumbled over the word, “love . . . with Veronica.”

  “How are you going to pretend you don’t know Daniel? That’ll be impossible. I saw you when you met him at the gallery; remember what a basketcase you were?”

  “I know, Sandra. Hashtag: disaster.”

  “There’s no way in this world anyone will believe you’ve never met him before if they see you together, especially not Daniel. And what about all the other people at the house and around the area?”

  “Gerald said if I decide to stay, he’ll tell everyone to keep the secret. I don’t know how I’ll do it either, but I have to try. Gerald asked me to. He actually apologized for sending me away.”

  “What about Veronica? You know she won’t keep it secret. She doesn’t want you there stealing Daniel away from her, and I don’t have to know her to know she’ll fight you with everything she’s got.”

  “I know, Sandra. But, I think Gerald’s hoping Daniel will remember me immediately; then that won’t be a problem. If she does tell Daniel, it won’t be any worse than what she’s already told him. Gerald said she made up all kinds of stories about our marriage. Daniel already thinks his first wife was trouble. Hashtag: witch.”

  The phone was quiet for the space of a minute. “Well, duck, it’s your decision to make, of course. If Daniel lost his memory, that means he doesn’t remember the accident either. That also means he can’t tell you what you went there to find out—what happened the day he threw you out.”

  “I could always ask Gerald, but I’d rather hear it from Daniel.”

  Sandra was quiet, but Marti sensed she wanted to say more. “I guess no matter what happens, it can’t be any worse than what you’ve been through already.”

  “So you’re okay with it?”

  “You know I’m behind whatever you decide, love.”

  Marti sat down on the straight chair at the back of the balcony and dropped her head. “I know there’s no future for us. If he gets his memory back, he’ll never forgive me, and if he doesn’t, he’ll end up marrying Veronica anyway. But, if I don’t help, and they get married, I’ll never forgive myself for not trying.”

  Sandra’s voice, uneasy and worried, finally came back across the phone line. “What about your stalker?”

  Marti shivered and struggled to keep her voice from giving away the attack she’d had on the road.

  “Let’s just hope he doesn’t find me out here. You and Wade still be careful, okay?”

  “We’ll be fine, Marti. If this is what you want, Wade and I are behind you one hundred percent. When you left, you went to find out why Daniel threw you out and planned to hightail it back home. Now, you’re talking about staying longer. That’s a big change of events. Make sure this is what you want to do.”

  “I don’t know what I want to do, Sandra. I’m hoping Daniel’s memory will return soon. Then . . . we can talk, and he can tell me why he was so angry over an accident that was surely just an accident. Maybe I won’t be here long enough for the creep threatening me to do anything. I just want you and Wade to be careful as long as I’m here. Please?”

  Sandra grunted. “Don’t worry about us, sweetie. Wade knows how to handle things. He installed a timer on your lamp above the gallery so it comes on at the usual time you have off—just as if you were here. And I think one of his men patrols outside every night.”

  Marti felt guilty for misleading Sandra, but Sandra couldn’t do anything to help now.

  Marti pulled at the skin on her chapped lips with her teeth. “Okay, Sandra. Thank you. I’ve been praying, and—”

  “You what? Did I hear you say you’ve been praying?”

  Marti smiled a thin line. “Yes, I’ve been praying. There’s something about this place that draws me closer to God. I asked Him to show me a sign . . . whether I should stay. I think your being okay with it might be what I needed to help me decide.”

  Sandra’s sigh could be heard through the line. “That’s jolly good news, believe me. Thank you, Lord. I’m glad something good is coming from this.”

  Marti smiled. Trust Sandra to speak her piece. “Please pray for me, Sandra. If you do, I promise, I’ll hang your next exhibit all by myself.”

  Sandra laughed. “You’ve got a deal, but I got a bargain because I’ve been praying for you for a year. Listen, love, be careful, okay?”

  When Marti finally hung up the phone, she shivered and rubbed her bare arms in the cool mountain air. She’d lost the stalker on the road long before she got here, so hopefully he wouldn’t be able to find her here—unless it was someone she knew. She couldn’t think of a single soul who wanted her to stay out of Texas bad enough to try and scare her away. Except maybe Veronica. No way could Daniel be involved. It had to be someone else. But Veronica? Maybe she wanted Daniel enough to go to such lengths. It could be her behind all the attacks.

  Suddenly, the hairs on the back of Marti’s neck prickled. A feeling of being watched tingled through her already sensitive emotions. Someone was watching her. She was sure if it. The same feeling she felt in Landeville traveled the length of her spine.

  The landscape around the house seemed still, but the trees swayed, hiding the barn’s open doors. As the leaves blew with the breeze, she could just make out an orange glow down by the stables.

  A cigarette?

  There it was again. It looked like the slow steady pull of a cigarette. She edged in behind the large curtains and closed the balcony doors, never taking her eyes from the pulsating glow. Sliding the lock into place, she checked it twice to make sure it was secure.

  A chill traveled through her body as she jerked the curtains closed and peeked through them one more time. The orange glow was gone. Maybe her imagination had switched into overdrive. It could have been a ranch hand taking a break, not even looking her way. She shook her head as she turned away from the doors.

  She felt a nervous tingling as she made her bed and prepared for the day. If she was going to stay, she needed to start thinking about the role she would play—a portrait artist who would paint Daniel’s portrait.

  Before leaving the room, she peeked out the sliding doors one more time. Everything seemed normal, but staying in Texas might not
have been her best decision.

  What have I done?

  TWENTY-TWO

  DANIEL TOWEL-DRIED HIS HAIR. When he heard his cell phone ringing in the other room, he ran to pick it up and punched the call button.

  “Morning, Veronica.”

  “Hey, darling. When are you coming home? This trip has been entirely too long.”

  “I’m home. Got home late last night. The rain started the last day of the auction, and we decided to leave a day early.”

  Veronica’s squeal came through the phone. “Oooo, wonderful, darling! I’m coming over as soon as I can. I told the architect to come a day early so I . . . I mean, so we could get the project started. Now that you’re home, that works even better.”

  “Dad said Mr. Reimes called this morning and said he couldn’t come today. He said he’ll be back in this area one day next week and he’d see us then. Something about a new barn going up over in Gale County.”

  Veronica was silent for a moment. “If he wasn’t the best architect in the state, I’d consider hiring someone else. This is the second time he’s postponed.”

  “Well, I guess he thinks remodeling and adding new stalls isn’t as important as building a whole new barn. I’m sure he’s thinking about his commission.”

  “Obviously not enough. He has to realize this is a paying job as well. He’ll probably work half the time and still charge us enough to build a whole new barn. That’s what they all do, isn’t it?”

  “Now, Nikki—”

  “I told you not to call me that. You know I hate it.” Her voice was strong, but the pout she thrust into the words hid the anger. “That’s upsetting, his not coming today. I had my heart set on getting these stalls built in a hurry and moving Stripes and Narnia over to your barn as soon as possible. Since we’re spending so much time together, it’d be nice to have them close.”