Losing It: A Collection of VCards

by Nikki Jefford

  His hand lightly squeezed mine. “Liam and Aden will be safe.” We continued to speak softly so Liam, my much too smart five-year-old brother, wouldn’t hear.

  I nodded. “It’s not just them, though, is it?” I said, thinking of what Bethi had revealed about Emmitt being in the most danger.

  Charlene, Emmitt’s mom, was like me, a uniquely gifted woman, one of the six Judgements meant to balance the three races. If Blake, the Urbat leader, captured Emmitt, Blake would not only have leverage over Charlene, but me as well because I’d Claimed Emmitt, making him twice the target.

  “I’ll be fine,” he said.

  I didn’t respond. We needed to complete our bond. It wouldn’t make him safe, but he’d be safer as my husband rather than my fiancé.

  Nervous anticipation unfurled in my middle. Werewolves didn’t marry in a conventional sense to become husband and wife, they Mated.

  Wife. Mated. Tonight. The words bounced around in my head as we drove further from the Compound.

  ***

  As soon as Emmitt pulled to a stop in the parking lot, Aden was crawling over Jim to get to the door.

  “Do you think there’s a swimming pool?” he asked excitedly.

  Jim laughed and caught Aden in his large arms. “I know there is. Grandma Charlene made sure of it.”

  Both boys cheered loudly. I couldn’t help but smile at their excitement even as my heart constricted with worry for them.

  Reaching for the door, Emmitt paused and turned to me.

  “Michelle…” He said my name with loving exasperation. “You’re killing me. Please. Trust us. Trust me. We’ll be safe.”

  I exhaled slowly, trying to let go of the concern that had burrowed into my head. It wasn’t working. He shook his head, leaned across the seat, and, with a glimmer of mischief in his eyes, slid his hand around the back of my head. He pulled me forward and caught my lips with his own.

  Outside, I heard a giggle. Then, Emmitt started to nibble at my lower lip. That was all it took to forget everything and open up to him. He deepened the kiss and robbed me of reality. I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck.

  A knock on the window startled me.

  “Come on,” Jim’s voice penetrated the haze Emmitt had created. “We want to go swimming.”

  “Yeah!” two voices echoed behind him.

  Emmitt pulled back and leaned his forehead against mine. “I’ll trade you brothers,” he whispered.

  “I’m hurt,” Jim said with a laugh, his werewolf hearing picking up Emmitt’s words.

  “I doubt it,” Emmitt said, releasing me and opening his door.

  Before I could reach for the handle, he was already out and around the car to open mine for me.

  I smiled up at him as I got out. The boys were racing toward the hotel with Jim jogging behind them, the sheep dog protecting his flock. The imagery made me smile. When in his wolf form, he wasn’t too far from the picture.

  “And what has you grinning like that?” Emmitt asked, wrapping his fingers around mine.

  “Them,” I said, nodding ahead at our brothers. “Jim may look twenty-fiveish but sometimes I don’t think he ever grew up.”

  “He did,” Emmitt said with a laugh. “He acts their age because they need a friend their age.”

  It was something I’d noticed about Jim. He always seemed to know what was needed.

  We walked in behind the group. Charlene and Thomas went to get rooms while the rest of us waited away from the desk. The boys danced around Jim in their excitement. They had no clue why we’d left. I studied the others in our group. Though I could see they were as tense as I, they hid it well.

  When Charlene and Thomas returned, she held up five cards. “They only had five rooms. One is the honeymoon suite,” she said as she handed a key card to Emmitt with a smile, “and the others are double queens.”

  My stomach flipped and my pulse leapt as Emmitt took the card and squeezed my hand. I struggled to stay focused as everyone else in our group called out with whom they’d room. Only Emmitt and I had a room to ourselves. An embarrassed flush rose to my cheeks.

  Everyone split up after a promise to meet in Charlene and Thomas’ room for dinner in twenty minutes. Emmitt carried our bags, and I walked beside him. We were both quiet. Butterflies launched in my stomach as we neared our room.

  He stopped in front of our door, opened it, and stepped aside so I could enter first.

  The large room boasted of a king size bed and a sunken hot tub. A bottle of champagne waited on the bed. Emmitt caught the direction of my gaze.

  “I’d prefer if you didn’t drink,” he said with a chuckle.

  I smiled as I remembered my earlier attempts at bravery. Liquid courage had its drawbacks. Like remembering. And I wanted to remember every moment of tonight, even if I was nervous.

  I closed the door while he set the bag on the bed. When he turned and found me hovering near the exit, he grinned at me then stalked me playfully.

  “Alone,” he said as he neared.

  His gaze swept my face, and I saw the raw desire there. He reached up to tug the end of my long brown hair gently, and I noticed his hand shake.

  Seeing his barely contained control, I wondered if he would be the big bad wolf for my first time or the sweet Emmitt I knew. I realized I would take either version of him. My nervousness fled, and I wanted to wrap my arms around him.

  He caught the direction of my gaze and the corner of his mouth lifted in a self-depreciating smile.

  “I’ve wanted this badly,” he said. “I’ve dreamt of it…” He stepped closer and lifted his hand to my cheek. “Again…” His thumb brushed over my lips and my pulse leapt. I stopped breathing as he leaned close, his lips hovering over mine. “And again…”

  My breath caught, and I lifted my chin just a fraction, ready to meet him.

  Someone knocked on the door, making me jump. Emmitt sighed and closed his eyes as Jim’s voice reached us from the hallway.

  “Time’s up. I was sent to get you before you two got distracted.”

  ***

  Everyone crowded into Thomas and Charlene’s room to eat our Thanksgiving meal. Instead of sitting beside me on the bed, Emmitt leaned against the wall across the room. I didn’t have time to consider his choice what with the talk of plans to find the next Judgement and to evade the Urbat.

  But, part way through the conversation, while I was taking another bite, I happened to glance Emmitt’s way and found him watching me with an intensity that made my legs weak. The corner of his mouth lifted in a slight sexy smile, furthering the effect. I blushed, quickly looked away, and tried to focus on the conversation once more. It did no good now that I knew he watched me.

  By the time the food was gone and the conversation wound down, a nervous energy consumed me. Emmitt pushed away from the wall, his eyes never leaving mine as he crossed the room to stand before me. He didn’t speak, just held out his hand. I gave him my empty plate instead of my hand. He grinned wide, tossed the plate into the garbage, then held out his hand again.

  My fingers trembled as I surrendered to him. He clasped my hand firmly, and after we said goodnight to my brothers, led me out the door.

  His thumb glided over the back of my hand in slow circles as we silently walked the hall to our room. The light touch set my skin tingling, and my anticipation of what was to come grew. This time there would be no interruption. My stomach dipped and flipped with a mixture of excitement and nervousness at the sight of our room.

  He opened the door, set his hand on the small of my back, and motioned for me to enter. I took a steadying breath and stepped over the threshold, the heat of his hand calming and exciting me at the same time.

  Behind me, I heard the click of the door closing, then the louder sound of the bolt sliding into place. The finality of those noises set my pulse racing. Alone. Like him, I’d dreamed of this moment for months.

  Emmitt’s heated touch left my back then his hands skimmed down my arms, caressi
ng their lengths. His slow movements and focused attention made my skin tingle with need. I could barely breathe from it, and if my heart started beating any harder, it would burst from my chest.

  “Shh,” he whispered softly, stepping closer until his chiseled chest pressed against my back.

  The contact did little to calm me; I ached for more. More contact. More touching. More of his love. But, his hands on my arms kept me still.

  He swept my hair aside and kissed my neck. I shivered, closed my eyes, and leaned back into him. He wrapped an arm around my waist to hold me there while his free hand smoothed over my ribs.

  “Your heart is beating so hard…” His breath brushed my skin with his quiet, hoarse words. His roaming hand lifted to settle on top my left breast, just above that tortured organ. My breathing hitched at the feel of his hand brushing the edge of my bra. His palm heated me. I wanted more. The tingling sensations he created on my neck were nothing compared to the burn of his palm.

  “Easy,” he breathed a second before he kissed my neck again.

  His other hand pressed flat on my stomach. But it didn’t stay idle long. With each melting brush of his lips against the curve of my neck, his fingers danced along the edge of my jeans, dipping in further and further. He teased my sensitive skin. The ache in my chest spread south, and I reached back to clutch his hips and hold onto him desperately. He groaned but didn’t stop. I made an unintelligible sound when his fingertips brushed the edge of my underwear. Once. Twice.

  Please, just dip inside, I thought.

  It barely registered that we stood just within the door. My world had dissolved until only Emmitt and his life-sustaining touch remained.

  Uncurling my fingers, I released my hold on him and boldly reached for my jeans. When I undid the button, he nipped my neck. The sensation robbed me of thought for a moment. When I pulled down the zipper, his fingers on my stomach flexed. Was he as desperate as I? When I started to wiggle out of my pants, he began to shake, and the hand that had remained so steadfast on my upper breast slid down to cup me fully. Heat burst inside me, waves of scalding desire burned away inhibition.

  I kicked my jeans off and tried to turn. His arms tightened around me, and he growled. The sound made the heat growing inside me more intense. I didn’t fear him or the control he was struggling to maintain.

  “Emmitt,” I said softly. “I want a kiss.”

  He laved my neck. I groaned wantonly. “My lips, Emmitt. I want you to—”

  He spun me around and before I had time to focus on him, his lips crashed upon mine. I opened my mouth to him and let him take what he needed. His kiss branded me, demanding my love, and I gave it willingly. His tongue conquered and showed no mercy while his arms wrapped around me.

  Without breaking our kiss, he started to move us, walking me backward. My legs bumped against the bed, and his mouth left mine.

  I panted for air, and it took a moment to realize my eyes were closed. When I opened them, I met his gaze.

  His eyes had changed. The pupils had grown abnormally large, and the tips of his canines had protruded from his lips. From him, I felt a wave of concern. I smiled softly and reached up to cup his cheek.

  “You sweet man, don’t stop.”

  He groaned, kissed me quickly, then started to tug my shirt up. I lifted my arms and let him take it from me. Once I stood before him in my bra and underwear, his tremors grew worse.

  “Shh,” I whispered, gently placing my hand over his beating heart as he’d done to me.

  He held still, letting me run my hand over his chest, then down his stomach. I found the bottom of his shirt and slid my hand underneath. His panting breaths became irregular as I slowly started pushing his shirt upward. He groaned and closed his eyes. A second later, he grabbed his shirt and tore it off, not having the patience for slow.

  The sight of his muscled chest and tight abs made my mouth dry. I put both my hands on his bare skin, trailing my fingertips along his ribs. Gently, I leaned forward and kissed the spot over his heart. He quivered under me, and his thundering pulse matched my own.

  His hands slid into my hair and fisted as I brushed my lips over his heart once more then blazed a path to the other side. Before I reached his nipple, he pulled me back and kissed me once more.

  His hands left my hair, touched down on my shoulders, and skimmed over my arms. His light caress heightened the feeling of his ravenous lips. It was only after he reached behind me that I realize he’d pushed the straps of my bra off my shoulders.

  He broke away from our kiss and hooked his fingers into the elastic of my underwear. He stared at me for a long moment as if waiting for permission. I set my hands on his and eased them down. When I wore nothing, he stepped back and looked at me. The raw desire in his gaze and his frayed control kept me from feeling embarrassed.

  He glanced down and tried to unbutton his own pants but his claws were making his job impossible. He growled in frustration, and I reached out and brushed his hands aside.

  “Michelle…I don’t think…” His words were guttural.

  “Then don’t. Not now,” I said in a husky voice I barely recognized as I eased his jeans down over his thighs.

  He made a strangled noise and between heartbeats, I found myself on the bed with Emmitt pressing down on me. He ignored my swollen lips and kissed a trail between my breasts. I quivered and fisted my hands in his hair. He continued to blaze a path from my lower ribs to my stomach. He kissed me there, tenderly, then lifted his head.

  “I want to see my cub growing here someday.” His rough words and the hope in his eyes burrowed into my heart.

  “Someday, I want your cub there, too,” I whispered.

  His lips went back to worshiping my skin. I closed my eyes and let my head drop back. When his breath teased my breast, my lungs stopped working. The heat of his mouth robbed me of thought. I arched against him. His hands gripped my ribcage and held me still. His attention didn’t waver for several long minutes. I was panting erratically when he finished.

  I was lost. To him. To the sensations he evoked. He was mine and I was his.

  He rose and claimed my lips once more. His fingertips traced the contours of my face as he kissed me hungrily. His knee nudged my legs apart. His hand gripped my thigh so it moved further still. Then his hips settled onto mine. The heat of him pressed against me, and he hissed and groaned into my mouth. He shifted over me, aligning us.

  “Mine. Forever,” he whispered in my ear as he pressed into me, completing our bond.

  I didn’t answer. I couldn’t. But we both knew I was his. Forever.

  ***

  I woke wrapped in his arms. The blankets and the sheets were mostly on the floor. I didn’t need them though. His skin, pressed against the length of me, kept me warm. I smiled to myself and sighed contentedly. Behind me, he stirred. The direction of his waking thoughts pressed urgently against my backside.

  His lips brushed my neck.

  “Good morning,” he said.

  “Good morning. Did you sleep well?”

  He made an agreeing noise and kept kissing me. I didn’t want him to stop, yet…

  “I need to use the bathroom,” I said, reluctantly.

  His lips stilled.

  “I’ll give you a two minute head start on the shower. Go,” he said with a playful swat on my butt.

  I sat up and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. There, I hesitated. Standing up and walking unabashedly nude across the room was beyond me. I peeked over my shoulder. He was watching me closely, with heat in his gaze. I blushed and reached out for the sheet at the end of the bed. He grinned wickedly, and I looked away. My face couldn’t stand much more heat. I pulled the sheet close and wrapped it around me before I stood.

  He groaned behind me. I smiled and walked to the bathroom.

  I took care of my immediate needs then started the shower. I’d just stepped behind the curtain when the door opened.

  “Two minutes are up,” he said, pulling the curtain
back and stepping in to join me.

  I was too busy eyeing the naked length of him to blush. The sun had kissed his chest and tight stomach. Just at his hips, tan met pale. My gaze dipped lower, and I swallowed.

  Mine, I thought.

  Forever, came the echoing reply. My eyes widened, and my gaze flew to his.

  He grinned at me. “Turn around, and I’ll wash your hair.”

  Willingly, I turned to face the hot spray. He lathered the wet strands and massaged my scalp. Then, he told me to turn and rinse. With my eyes closed and head tilted back, his soapy hands wandered over my front, gently cupping or tweaking my skin until I panted and shook.

  The shower didn’t last long before we were back in bed, still a bit wet. This time, I didn’t need a slow conquest or a nudge to part for him. Emmitt was my home, and I welcomed his hips over mine.

  We merged with ease, and I sighed. My hands smoothed over his strong shoulders and down his corded back as he moved within me. I hooked my legs around his, trying to draw him closer. With his steady, slow rhythm, he loved me completely.

  An hour later, we’d packed up and left our room. Our stomachs wouldn’t stop growling, and Emmitt grinned each time mine answered his. It was as if they were conversing.

  Emmitt held my hand as we walked to the breakfast area. Bethi and Luke were already there.

  While Emmitt and I waited for waffles, the remaining members of our group arrived. I caught Charlene’s happy look at us and blushed at Jim’s knowing glance. It would be hard for them not to know we’d completed our bond because Emmitt took every opportunity to brush against me. His arm against mine. A stretch to reach the milk that brought his mouth close to my ear. All innocent moves on the surface, but each one sent tingles everywhere and made my pulse leap. When I glanced at him, he gave me a wicked smile. He knew what he did to me.

  As soon as the waffle maker beeped, he gave me a quick kiss. I heard Aiden’s giggle and Jim’s whispered, “Do you think she’d noticed if I stole her waffle?”

  Emmitt pulled back and winked at my brothers.

  I was contemplating how much time we had before we needed to leave when Bethi spoke, dissolving my love-hazed world.