Losing It: A Collection of VCards

by Nikki Jefford

  Age doesn’t always dictate whom you will love, though. So I’m A Double Threat is the start of their journey. Will young love survive the challenges presented them or is friendship all they can really hope for? Fast forward to Meg’s senior year—Alex’s junior year in college— and the scene that follows to answer that very important question.

  ***

  “Happy eighteenth birthday, Megan,” Alex says.

  “Thank you. Tonight has been perfect,” I tell him. “But there’s only one more thing that can make this night complete.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Let’s go up to your room and find out.” He knows exactly what I’m taking about. We’ve waited long enough. Tonight is the night. I’m eighteen. Finally. I’m legal. No worries. No regrets.

  Besides, this is so different than the many other times I have considered sleeping with Alex. I was afraid, nervous, and so unsure before. Now, there isn’t anything holding me back. I know what I want and I know he wants it, too.

  Silently, he takes a deep breath causing his chest to puff up and down noticeably. “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah,” I say, nodding. “I am. But let’s just see what happens. You never know. I could change my mind.” Although, I know I won’t.

  He reaches out and grasps my hands, squeezing lightly. He waits until my gaze meets his before he responds. “And you know that would be okay with me?”

  “I know.”

  If I suddenly changed my mind and was like, just kidding, I know Alex would be fine with my decision. That’s one of the many things I love about him. He’s always been patient with me and I don’t expect him to be any different tonight.

  Alex is still rooted where he stands, so I make the first move. Backing up, I start to lead him down the hall.

  When we walk into his room, Alex flips the light switch and it’s not surprising that his room is spotless. It always is. There’s a click as he closes the door and locks it behind us.

  “Give me a minute while I do a few things in here.”

  I watch as he transforms the small living space into a candle-lit bedroom. Slow songs playing in the background, making me feel like I’ve been transplanted onto the set of a romantic film.

  “You’ve put some thought into this,” I say.

  He steps in front of me, reaching out to smooth my hair with his hands. “I want tonight to be perfect for you. For us.”

  I gaze up into his eyes, my heart pounding and overflowing with love. “As long as we’re together, it’ll be perfect.” I know it sounds corny, but hey, he’s hot, and we’ve waited a loooong time.

  He dips his head and his lips touch mine. Slowly and tenderly his mouth caresses my own. I tilt my head to deepen the kiss and our tongues dance, brushing against each other in a steady rhythm.

  My hands curve around his waist, then trail up his back under his shirt. The heat of his smooth skin on my fingertips sends fireworks throughout my body. His mouth feasts on the tender skin under my ear. Mmm, it feels so damn good.

  I lift his shirt to reveal his sexy-ass chest—the one that my friend captured in a drawing of all of our guy friends at the beach. Alex could give the cover models on my mom’s mommy porn books a run for their money. He’s fucking hot. And he’s mine.

  My palms flatten against his collarbone and then drag down toward his V. I trace the outline of his muscles with my fingertips, a journey they’ve thoroughly enjoyed countless times before. Damn, he’s so sexy.

  I feel Alex’s grip on the bare skin of my hips and I relax into his touch. Then his hands travel to my back and my shirt begins to rise over my head.

  Piece by piece, we take turns peeling clothes off each other until we’re standing stomach to stomach with nothing but our underwear between us.

  Allowing myself one more touch, I follow a path from his neck, down the center of his chest to the faint happy trail toward his boxer briefs. He squirms underneath the heat of my hand. And I love it.

  It pains me to step away from him, but I do. I turn toward his bed and pull back the covers. Not wasting any time, he starts to put a knee on his mattress, but I stop him.

  “Not yet. I wanna be naked with you first. I want you to see me…and I want to see you.”

  The moan that comes from Alex at that request makes every hair on my body rise. How can one sound turn me on so much and so quickly?

  Suddenly, his mouth is on mine and he’s feasting on my lips, my tongue, my neck, and my chest. His kisses are just as sweet and tender as before, but with a whole new intensity. I just can’t get enough. This is pure bliss. Everything I have ever imagined and so much more. “You are amazing, babe,” he says. He reaches behind my back and unhooks my bra. With care, he slides the straps off my shoulders, following them with gentle kisses before his hands find my boobs.

  With my heart beating faster than ever before, I hook my thumbs inside his boxers and slide them down his hips. I take in the sight of him, and I know, without a doubt, that I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life. This is going to happen. I love Alex, and I’m completely, absolutely ready for what’s about to come.

  Slowly, Alex drops down to his knees. He places a light peck to my belly. He kisses each of my hips and then gradually peels down my panties, past my hips, past my thighs, his mouth following the path along the way until my undies drop to the floor.

  Holy fuck. What this guy does to me is indescribable.

  I have to steady myself with a hand on his shoulder when his fingers stop to wander between my thighs. A whole new wave of warmth washes over me, sparks flying up and down my body before settling at my core. This isn’t new to me entirely; we’ve done this before. He’s done this to me, but tonight the feeling is at a whole other level. It’s simply mind-altering. My breath comes out in stuttered pulses along with a whimper when he increases the speed and rhythm of his fingers. He must recognize my trembling legs because he steadies his pace again, looking up at me, our eyes locked onto each other until he stops moving completely. If he was testing the waters—so to speak—my body left no room for doubt. I’m definitely ready for him.

  As he rises to his feet again, Alex trails kisses all the way up my body setting off sparks of electricity along the way.

  “You…have…protection…right?” I ask, breathlessly.

  It’s as if we’re both so entranced that we can barely form any words. He nods, and then reaches to his desk drawer and pulls out a foil packet. I take it from him and climb into his bed. He follows, settling himself on top of me, as I get comfortable on my back.

  He gazes into my eyes before he sprinkles sweet kisses on my lips, cheeks, and chin. With one last peck to my forehead, Alex looks deeply into my eyes. “I love you. No more holding out on me, babe. You’re my girlfriend now, right?”

  The question makes me laugh inside. The poor guy. Not only have I been holding out on him sexually, but I’ve been adamant about not defining our relationship until now. We’ve been through so much over the last four years. We’re together. We’re not. I’m ready. He’s not. He’s ready. I’m not. I guess I’ve just been waiting for our paths to finally cross. No, that’s not right. I’ve been waiting for our paths to meet and connect. Waiting for our time to be our time. And now, that’s happened. We’re there. Finally.

  “Yes, I’m your girlfriend,” I say with a slight chuckle. “And I love you, too, more than anything. You’re my best friend and you’re the love of my life. Now, will you make love to me?”

  We’re both still for several beats, our eyes closed, our lips gently connected, love pouring through each of us. Then, our eyes flutter open and he meets my stare. He leans back on his knees, takes the foil packet from my hand, and tears it open. I watch as he slides the condom on. His warm hands touch my thighs, and my legs fall freely apart, completely ready for what we’re about to share. Alex never takes his eyes off mine while he settles himself above me.

  I’ve looked into Alex’s eyes many times before. We’ve spent hours tal
king, laughing, gazing. But there is something in his expression now that takes my breath away. His eyes are so serious—loving—yet seeming to burn with lust. Intense. And then he smiles and it’s like the room is suddenly alive with light. I smile too, and I realize I feel so incredibly happy.

  This feels right.

  Perfect.

  Just like I knew it would be.

  “I love you, Megan,” he says, barely grazing my mouth with his.

  “I love you, too, Alex. This is it. This is our someday.”

  His stare is filled with emotion. “No, Megan.” His soft lips brush against mine. “This…is our forever.”

  Tears pool in my eyes. I’m overwhelmed by the love we share. I’ve dreamed of this moment since I met him years ago and decided that I wanted Alex to be mine. We’ve come along way since then. We’ve been through so much to get to where we are today. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  I love Alex. He is mine. And we’re about to make love.

  I’m not sure what to do next. I smile against his mouth and decide to let him take the lead. I trust him with my heart, my body, my soul.

  There’s no doubt he’s just as ready as I am. The feel of his erection presses between my legs as he kisses me softly. I kiss him back while my hands grasp onto his hips and pull him closer to me. It’s instinct. I just want to crawl all over him and hold him as close to me as possible. The tenderness and warmth of our naked bodies touching is simply amazing. I never want to stop feeling what I feel right now.

  Slowly, Alex’s hand travels down my body until his fingers trace the seam of my opening. One finger slips inside of me and oh my… If I didn’t want to crawl all over him before, now I want to just burrow myself under his skin and live there. My toes are curling with the pleasure he’s giving me with his fingers.

  “Are you still sure, Meg?” His tone is gravelly in my ear making him even sexier than before.

  “Absolutely.” I meet his gaze. “I’m not changing my mind. I want you.”

  Balancing himself on his knees and holding himself up on one elbow, he uses his hand to position himself at my entrance.

  “I’m going to go slow, Meggie. Tell me if you’re uncomfortable or if it hurts and I’ll stop.”

  He’s nervous and it has to be the cutest thing ever.

  “And it’s not going to last long, so we’ll have to try this again in a little bit.”

  “Alex.”

  “Yes.”

  “Just do it already.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  With that, Alex pushes himself inside me. Just a little. He’s right. It’s uncomfortable. Like the first time I tried to use a tampon, only if that cotton wad was exponentially bigger.

  “Are you okay?” he asks.

  Crap. I was hoping he didn’t notice me wince. “I think so. It’s just different. Keep going.”

  He raises a brow at me, questioning me for certainty. I grab his hips again and pull him toward me.

  Alex moves his face toward mine and captures my mouth in a kiss. It’s hot as hell as his moist lips grasp onto mine, tugging, kissing, nipping, licking. With each kiss, he slides in and out of me slowly, gently, going deeper and deeper with each stroke.

  Sweet Jesus. The uncomfortable invasion of before has been replaced with warm tingles swirling around in my body from my head to my toes. Dammit. The sensation is so intense I can barely stand it. It feels so damn good.

  We’re a tangled mess of lips, hands, moans and groans as our hips meet each other with each thrust. There’s no denying the electricity between us. This. This was definitely worth the wait.

  Just as I decide I never want this to end, it does. Alex’s body stills for a second, his arms and legs quiver, and then his weight falls on me.

  “Told ya,” he says, breathlessly. I can feel his heart pounding against my chest. His skin is damp and I just want to slip and slide against him. It’s so freaking hot I can’t believe it’s really happening.

  “What’s that?”

  “I knew I wouldn’t last long. I’ve been waiting for this moment for four years. I’m surprised I lasted longer than four seconds.” He peels his face from my neck and pecks my lips with his.

  I know the instant Alex pulls out of me. It’s a weird filling of emptiness. Like now that he’s been there, it’s like a piece of me is missing. He slides his body off me and lies on his side, his elbow holding him up and his palm propping up his head.

  “How are you feeling? Are you okay?”

  “I’m awesome. That was fan-fucking-tastic.” I’ve never held back from him before. No need to start now.

  A smile spreads across his gorgeous face reaching all the way to his eyes. “Was it now?”

  “Uh yeah.” I smile right back at him. I’m still hot down there, still buzzing with want. “What did you say about trying that again?”

  “You want more?”

  Did he really have to ask? “Hell yes.”

  “Good, because I’m not done with you yet.” He hovers over me again, presses his lips to mine, kissing me like there’s no tomorrow. If my heart beats any faster, I’m sure it’s going to explode right out of my chest. Inch by slow agonizing inch, Alex kisses down my body, dragging his tongue along each of my nipples then licking his way to my center.

  I know what he’s going to do before he gets there and now, my heart has stopped.

  Holy shit is all I can think as I gasp for air when his mouth claims my buzzing hoo-ha. He licks, sucks, and laps me up like I’m the last drop of water on the planet. Between his tongue and his fingers, I can’t breathe. My body is tingling all over, shaking with his every move.

  “It’s okay, Meggie,” he says, his breath sweet torture on my lower lips. “Let go for me.”

  God, he knows me so well. I know what’s happening to me, too. I didn’t the first time and it scared the shit out of me. To let go, to give myself to him when I didn’t understand what was happening to my body.

  “I love you,” he whispers against me, and that’s all I need to hear to relax into his touch and give in to the pleasure steamrolling through me. With one last swipe of his tongue, he takes me over the edge and back.

  I lie here, breathless, unable to move, my body so lax I feel like a cooked noodle. Alex kisses a path along the center of my body until he presses his lips to mine.

  My chest heaves up and down against his as he smiles at me. I love him. So much.

  “You still want more?” He winks.

  A smile spreads across my lips. “Hell yes.”

  “Give me a few minutes and we’ll be back at it in no time.”

  I try to steady my breathing, inhaling and exhaling slowly. “Just a few minutes? That’s all it takes to get him back in working condition?”

  “Babe, I’m twenty, not fifty. I’ve had a constant hard-on for you for as long as I can remember. As a matter of fact, you got me hard all over again just now.”

  My brows rise.

  “Don’t get any ideas. I need to get rid of this noose first.”

  By noose, I’m guessing he’s talking about the condom. Alex climbs over me, jumps off his bed, and disappears into his bathroom. I love that he makes no attempt to cover up. Not that he would. He’s a guy, but I don’t plan on covering up. I’m totally comfortable with him. My mom always told me that if I couldn’t let him see me naked with the lights on, in all my freaking glory, then I had no business having sex. There are no problems in that department. It hasn’t been long since we shed our clothes, but I already know I love being naked with Alex. I love the feeling of his skin on mine.

  When Alex comes back into his room, he stands in front of me with his hands on his hips, smiling. He’s still nude, his bronze-colored muscular body on display for me. Holy smokin’ boyfriend. He could be on the cover of a Playgirl magazine.

  “I have an idea,” he says, holding out his hand to me.

  Tossing back the comforter first, I slide out of Alex’s bed. “What’s that?”

&n
bsp; “How about a warm bath? My tub is huge and it has jets.” He wags his eyebrows at me.

  I take his hand. “Sounds perfect.”

  The water is already running and the tub is almost halfway full. Alex squirts a drop of soap into the stream coming from the faucet before turning off the water completely.

  “Stick your toes in and see if the temperature is okay.”

  I do as he says. It’s not scorching hot, just a little more than warm. “It feels nice.” I step inside the tub and Alex follows. He lowers himself in completely, until he’s sitting with his back against the wall.

  “Your turn,” he says, holding up his hands to me.

  Settling myself between his legs, I sit with my back to his front. The water feels amazing. It gets even better when Alex taps on something and the jets get going. Bubbles start to form in mass and the water rises covering each of our bodies entirely. I relax against my boyfriend, soaking in the pleasure of my bare skin touching his again. I smile when I feel his erection against my ass. He was right when he said he’d be ready to go in a few minutes. Boy, he wasn’t kidding.

  “Are you trying to tell me something?” I ask him, jokingly swishing my ass back and forth against his wood.

  He holds my hips still. “No. I wasn’t. But if you keep moving like that, I’m going to be throwing you back on that bed, dripping wet and all.”

  A throbbing pulses between my legs at the thought. Just imagining it has me clenching my thighs together.

  Smiling again, I tilt my head upward and place a few smooches along Alex’s jaw. “I’d love to get back to that, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t loving this, too. Why haven’t we ever taken a bath together? This is awesome.”

  The comfort of his strong embrace surrounds me. One arms curves around my waist, while the other crosses over my chest. There isn’t a place I’d rather be than in Alex’s arms. I feel so loved, and oh so freaking hot.

  “Just another thing I thought was worth the wait.” He kisses my neck. “Plus, if we had taken a bath together…like this…there wouldn’t have been any holding back. We would’ve had sex and your dad would’ve shot me.”