Finding Joy (Love's Compass Book 5)

by Melanie D. Snitker

  When Dad started to tell them about their trek through Spain last month, Chelsea threw caution to the wind and took a bite anyway. A little pain was a welcome distraction about now.

  Her phone chimed from her handbag on the floor next to her chair. She reached for it, shocked when she saw she’d received a text from Parker. Maybe there was some kind of emergency and she was needed at work. Yeah, a girl could hope.

  Mom and Dad hadn’t even noticed she was checking her phone. She opened the text.

  “How’s it going? You surviving?”

  Chelsea resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She texted him back. “I’m kind of wishing it were possible to drown in my ricotta right now.”

  Now Mom was telling them about how she could hardly wait until they began their tour of Ireland when they left the States again. They originally said they’d stay local for a couple of months, but Chelsea would believe that when she saw it. Mom was made to travel.

  Another ping. “I knew I should’ve had you sand the dock to better prepare you to face your foe, Chelsea-san.”

  Chelsea tried to muffle a laugh with her napkin but didn’t quite succeed. All four pairs of eyes were on her. She calmly wiped her mouth, laid the napkin across her lap, and covered with a drink. “I’m sorry. Please, Mom, do tell us about the hotel in Dublin you can’t wait to see.”

  That was all it took, and Mom was happily reciting all the information she’d read about online.

  Chelsea discretely responded to the text. “I fear the only battle I’ll face is one of words, Mr. Miyagi.”

  She turned the phone volume off. The last thing she needed was Mom or Dad asking her any questions. Laurie caught her eye and raised a brow.

  Chelsea gave a little shrug but couldn’t quite keep the smile from her lips. That twinkle in Laurie’s eye told Chelsea she would have some explaining to do.

  An hour later, Laurie took a glimpse of the clock on the wall. “Mom, Dad. I’m sorry, but we’re going to have to get back to the hospital soon. Nicholas will be ready to eat.”

  “You need to let the nurses care for him. That’s what they’re there for.” Mom dabbed her mouth with a napkin. “I think we could do with a round of drinks to finish the evening.”

  Laurie immediately shook her head. “I don’t want the nurses to take care of him, Mom. I want to do that. After all, we won’t have help twenty-four hours a day when he comes home.”

  Mom blinked at Laurie as though she’d spoken in a foreign language. “You have no idea how much work a baby can be. You’ll change your mind and hire a nanny in a week. Mark my words.”

  Chelsea could barely contain her anger. Mom had no idea what it took to raise a baby, since she’d hired other people to do just that. How dare she imply she knew more about it than Laurie did?

  Tuck set his glass down and spoke firmly. “Our son will need to be fed. Visiting hours will be over before long as well. And I can’t go back to the house before telling my boy good night.” He put his napkin on the table and hailed the waiter as the man walked by.

  Chelsea wanted to pat her brother-in-law on the back for his major redirection skills.

  The waiter returned with their check and Dad took it, slid a card into the leather case, and handed it right back.

  Thank you, God. That ricotta was good, but it wasn’t $40.00 good.

  Laurie appeared more than relieved, too.

  Once outside the restaurant, they said their goodbyes.

  “Your father and I are hoping to sleep in tomorrow. Perhaps we could all get together for an early dinner?” Mom patted her hair, not that a single strand had come out of place all evening.

  “Sure, Mom, that’ll be fine.” Laurie’s voice was strained, her face pale, as she stifled a yawn. Tuck put a hand on her back. “Why don’t you call me when you guys are up and we’ll figure something out.”

  “That sounds lovely. Good night, darlings.”

  Their parents crossed the parking lot to the Mercedes Dad rented and drove out of sight.

  Laurie’s shoulders sank, and she leaned into Tuck. “And we have a month or two of this. Maybe, if I breastfeed in front of them, they’ll shorten their stay.”

  Tuck laughed loudly at that. “Honey, you did great tonight. I’m proud of you. Now let’s get you back so you can feed Nicholas and get some much-needed rest.”

  “Yes, please.” Laurie straightened and walked to Chelsea, hugging her tight. “Thanks for being here, Chels. Couldn’t have done it without you.”

  “We survived, girl. We’ve got this. You go rest, okay? Call me in the morning.”

  “I will.” Laurie poked Chelsea in the shoulder. “And don’t think I’m going to let you get away without telling me about what was so funny earlier.”

  Chelsea suppressed a chuckle.

  Tuck gave Chelsea a hug. “Be careful going home. Call us if you need anything.”

  “You bet. Good night, you two.”

  Chelsea got into her car and let out a slow sigh of relief. Well, she’d managed to get through tonight with no topics coming up that concerned her, where she lived, or what she was doing with her life. She wanted to count it a win, but she knew full well the whole storm was looming on the horizon.

  She turned her phone on again and read over the texts from Parker. He’d sent one more that she hadn’t seen before.

  “Then be strong and don’t let negative words steal that smile.”

  His own words brought out the very smile he spoke of. She groaned and let her head fall back against the headrest of her seat.

  Her parents’ thoughtless comments to Laurie tonight only made Chelsea more determined to show them she was creating a life — an identity — of her own. She would meet them again tomorrow and knew the inquisition would begin then. Before they left the country again, she wanted to tell them she had a full-time, permanent position at the ranch.

  She thought about that kiss on the dock and how she couldn’t wait to see Parker on Monday. She was going to text him back but changed her mind. Her job there was incredibly important, and she needed to draw a line in the sand. No, she needed to build a brick wall. And texting back and forth with her handsome employer was out of the question.

  Handsome? She meant annoying. Rude. Outspoken.

  The guy who went to visit children at the hospital every Monday.

  Who bought her blueberry tea to apologize for jumping to conclusions.

  Whose touch sent her heart rate to the moon and back.

  Oh yeah, this was going to be way easier said than done.

  Chapter Twelve

  Parker checked his phone one last time before switching off the bedside light. He’d hoped Chelsea might text and tell him how her evening went. He’d gone back and forth about whether he should’ve texted her at all. But as soon as he remembered how stressed she was and how much the dinner weighed on her, he’d had to.

  But now he was worried he’d pushed it with that last message. Had he made her uncomfortable? He should’ve stuck with The Karate Kid references. Even if her smile was the first thing he saw every time he closed his eyes.

  Happy made his two circular passes at the foot of the bed before lying down at his owner’s feet.

  For the first time in a year, Parker didn’t dread going to sleep because of the impending nightmares. Instead, he looked forward to the weekend and even more so for Monday when he’d see Chelsea again.

  Without warning, Kara’s voice came to mind.

  “Why don’t we pray anymore, Parker?”

  Because they’d gotten out of the habit. Because, in a way, Parker had blamed God for Dad’s death. Or maybe it was more of a disconnect that he’d felt at the time. He truly didn’t even know.

  But his accident? He’d blamed God for that one. Blamed Him for losing his job, the damage to his body, the lack of confidence he had in himself after all of that. Even for Brenda leaving him.

  Except, what had his old life brought him? Certainly recognition among his peers. A lot of money
. Women sought him out, to the point where he couldn’t go somewhere without dealing with the crowds of admirers. He’d told himself it was all part of the job.

  Now? He enjoyed his solitude. In fact, he appreciated that he could go places in town without being bothered.

  And he certainly never would’ve met Chelsea with his previous lifestyle.

  If it hadn’t been for the injuries he’d sustained in the accident, he’d have gone right back to roping. His heart squeezed.

  “Father, I’ve doubted Your goodness for a long time now. I’m not even sure how to pray anymore.”

  Happy must’ve sensed the change in his owner’s mood. He moved and lay down in the crook of Parker’s arm. Parker scratched the dog’s ear as he drifted back to sleep.

  “I can’t begin to understand why things have happened the way they have. I still miss Dad.” His voice cracked. “He’d be happy I’m back on the ranch again. Help me to see the positive side of things more and be thankful for what I do have.”

  They were the last words Parker spoke as sleep claimed him. For the first night in a long time, he didn’t dream about accidents or injuries, of fire or death, or even of roping or moments with Dad. Instead, it was a sleep filled with peace and the occasional smile of a woman with stunning green eyes.

  ~

  Chelsea stood at the window in the hospital room Laurie had been staying in with Nicholas. It was a chilly Saturday but you wouldn’t know it from the inside. Sunshine and blue skies gave the illusion of a warm day. All the bare trees would begin to get new leaves soon. Chelsea couldn’t wait — spring was her favorite time of the year.

  “Okay, spill.”

  Chelsea turned. Laurie had finished feeding Nicholas and was gently burping him against her shoulder. “What are you talking about?”

  Laurie shook her head in mock pity. “I gave you time to tell me about last night on your own. But since you won’t, I have to ask. What text did you get at dinner that was so funny?”

  Chelsea tried to keep any reactions at bay but she couldn’t. Her face heated as her lips transformed into a silly smile. “It was just something my boss said. He knew I was worried about last night and was trying to make me laugh. It’s a long story and not very interesting.”

  “I doubt that it’s not interesting. He succeeded.” Laurie was all curiosity now. “So, I take it you and Parker are getting along okay now?”

  “For the moment, anyway.” Chelsea shrugged, hoping she appeared nonchalant. “He’s my boss, Laurie.”

  “And you like him.”

  “Maybe. But does it matter? I need this job and I can’t afford to risk it. Especially not right now.”

  Laurie took her time kissing her baby’s sleeping face before placing him carefully in the little bed next to the one she was lounging on. Once he was settled and the oxygen tube arranged, she turned to Chelsea, determination filling her eyes.

  “You let Mom and Dad dictate everything in your life until you came to Kitner. Everything. Don’t you realize that’s exactly what you’re doing now, too? You’re letting your fear of what they’ll think about you and your job determine whether or not you pursue a relationship with Parker.”

  “Whoa, now.” Chelsea held up both hands. “A handful of texts and a kiss does not equal a relationship.”

  “You kissed?!” The last word came out as a hiss when Laurie tried to lower her voice so she wouldn’t wake up Nicholas. “How? What happened?”

  There was nothing Chelsea could do now except tell Laurie about that afternoon on the dock. “You see what I mean? It barely counted as a kiss. He couldn’t even stand being around me until last week.”

  “People change, Chels.”

  “Yeah.” Right now, Chelsea’s heart was in a tug-of-war between hope that Parker had changed, and doubts insisting it was a fluke and they’d only end up arguing like they had in the past. Those thoughts aside, how would Mrs. Wilson feel about her son being interested in one of her employees? She could almost picture Mrs. Wilson yelling her right off the ranch. “I can’t risk it, Laurie. At least not while Mom and Dad are here. I need to keep some distance for a while.”

  By the look on Laurie’s face, she obviously disagreed. Chelsea’s heart did, too. But she had to be smart about this. Letting a silly crush on her boss impede her job would be foolhardy.

  Their parents would be in town for a couple of months at most. She wasn’t so lonely or desperate she couldn’t wait until they left to see if there was anything between her and Parker. By then, they’d likely be back to not speaking to each other anyway.

  Chelsea wasn’t sure she’d actually convinced herself of that, but it helped. The most important thing was to put that kiss out of her mind. Because that couldn’t happen again.

  Laurie was watching Nicholas sleep, her face sad.

  Chelsea moved to sit next to her on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

  “I wish we didn’t have to meet Mom and Dad anywhere. I don’t like leaving him here at the hospital. If I could, I’d stay right here until he gets to leave with us.” A tear escaped and slid down her cheek.

  Chelsea put an arm around her sister and gave her a hug. “I’m sorry. Did you call Lexi?”

  Laurie sniffed. “That’s the only thing that makes it better. She’s going to come and volunteer in the nursery until we get back. The nurses here are great. But I do feel better knowing his Aunt Lexi is looking out for him while we’re gone.”

  They smiled as Nicholas made sweet little noises in his sleep.

  Chelsea knew having him stay here at the hospital had been hard on Tuck and Laurie. She closed her eyes. God, please let him go home soon. Thank you for helping him get stronger every day.

  Tuck’s boots announced his presence. He looked concerned when he saw Laurie’s face but Chelsea gave him a thumb’s up and he relaxed. “They’ll be here any minute.” He stepped to the side to allow his older sister, Lexi, into the room.

  Laurie and Chelsea let out a collective sigh and stood.

  Lexi went to the baby bed and softly stroked Nicholas’s hand. “I’ll keep this little guy company while you’re gone. I have some of the milk you pumped in the nursery. But if he’s not happy with that, I’ll call you guys and you can come feed him yourself.” Laurie nodded but didn’t seem convinced. “I promise I’ll call you over any little thing, okay?”

  Laurie hugged her. “Thank you.”

  Lexi’s face brightened. “Anything for my nephew. Oh, and my brother and sister, too, of course.” She winked at them.

  “Let’s go meet them in the lobby,” Tuck suggested. They agreed and filed out of the room.

  Chelsea glanced back one last time as Lexi lightly touched the baby’s head. She knew Lance and Lexi desperately wanted children. But Lexi’s fight with ovarian cancer had resulted in a complete hysterectomy. The couple couldn’t have children of their own. The last Chelsea had heard, they were going through classes to become licensed foster parents. She had no doubt they’d be a huge blessing to a child who needed a family.

  Speaking of family, her parents were waiting for them in the hall. It was time for Chelsea to put her game face on. Round two: Commencing.

  ~

  Parker settled around the dining room table with Mom, Kara, and Ben. It was weird to think soon, he wouldn’t be eating meals with Kara every day. Thankfully, Kara and Ben would stay in Kitner so at least Parker would see his sister regularly. Still, it wouldn’t be quite the same.

  Lunch had been served. But before Parker reached for his fork, he cleared his throat. “Mom. Do you mind if I pray over the meal?”

  Within moments, both women had tears in their eyes. Mom put her own fork down and folded her hands in her lap. “That’d be lovely, Parker. Thank you.”

  Parker fought down his own emotions. “Father, we thank You for this food we’re about to eat. We thank You for our health and for Kara’s upcoming wedding. We ask that You remind us daily of Your blessings. Amen.”

  The others echoed with
their own “amen.” The room was quiet, punctuated by a sniff or two.

  They ate for a while, the conversation centered on wedding details. Ben filled them in on the latest travel details for the honeymoon: A trip to Cancun.

  When there was a pause, Mom switched gears. “Chelsea’s been working with us for two weeks now. How do you think she’s fitting in?” She used her fork to lift the last bite of her salad.

  Parker looked across the table at her. “She’s doing well. I wasn’t sure about her at first, but she’s adjusted to the ranch and her position nicely.” He paused. “I hadn’t realized you’d hired her through a temp agency.”

  “I normally wouldn’t have used one, except that Deloris highly recommended it. And you know her daughter, Pam, runs the agency. I figured it was worth the risk to try something new.” Mom shrugged it off like it was no big deal.

  Well, if she did know the mother of the daughter who ran the agency, Parker understood it all a little more. Normally, he couldn’t imagine his mom using a temp agency for anything. It was all about contacts, she’d say. Then you were bound to hire someone who was more likely to do the job you were paying them to do.

  “Well, it worked out, then.”

  “You have no objections to making her position a permanent one, then?” There was no missing the way Mom inspected him over the top of her water glass. He’d put up quite a fight about hiring anyone in the first place. And while he’d tried to hide how he felt when he’d first learned of Chelsea joining the staff there at the ranch, he was certain his mom could at least guess how unhappy he was with the decision. Now, the thought of Chelsea disappearing from his life made his chest ache.

  “None.” He tried for a relaxed, neutral tone, but wasn’t sure he’d achieved that.

  “Good.” The half-smile on her face and the twinkle in her eye caught Parker off guard.

  Could she tell he’d developed an interest in Chelsea? He hoped not. He’d done his best to shove those emotions down as far as he could. Except that it hadn’t worked. Goodness knows he’d thought of her non-stop since they’d worked together at the stock pond. Since he’d kissed her.