Crazy Kind of Love

by T. Styles

  “What?”

  “I’m starting to think that the man in the hotel might have been hired to kill me.”

  “Tell me everything, Lourdes. I have to know.”

  “I witnessed a child murder another child and I was sent to Baltimore to keep me safe. I was supposed to testify in court so they put me in protective custody so that her father, a drug kingpin, wouldn’t hurt me.”

  “So you were going to snitch?”

  “It’s not snitching when a child’s involved.”

  As much as I hated to admit it, she was right. “Normally I don’t play the snitch shit but if it’s a child involved, you owe it to the parents and yourself to seek justice for that child, feel me?”

  “I feel you,” she responded. “But I need to talk to the one who killed her so that I can figure out what I’m going to do.”

  “You should leave it alone, Lourdes. Too much is going on now.”

  “I can’t keep running away from my problems. I have to face them head on. I need to talk to Feather and based on what I feel, I’ll be able to determine if I should testify or find another way to help her.”

  “How do you plan on getting close to the child whose father wants you dead?” “I don’t know but I have to try.”

  Suddenly I was done talking and I just looked at her. She was braver than I thought and that made me respect her more. My eyes rolled over the curves of her body. I wanted her.

  “Preacher, I don’t want to read you the wrong way,” she said looking into my eyes. “So I need to be clear. Do you want me?” Her voice was sultry.

  In a deep, clear voice I said, “Yes. I do.”

  I moved in closer and cradled her face in my hands. Pulling her body into mine, I kissed her deeply. I made my way down her neck and then covered her breasts with wet kisses. I sucked on her erect nipples and worshiped her body with my hands, squeezing her ample ass.

  For a moment, her body went still. She sharply exhaled through her nostrils.

  “I want to make love to you, Lourdes. I want to please you…not as a predator or a perverted trick but as a nigga that’s feeling you…is that okay?” I asked looking into her eyes.

  She smiled. “I want nothing more.”

  Suddenly her body was lively again and she wiggled her hips, helping me take her skirt off.

  Then Lourdes said something I would never forget. “I ain’t never had a man make love to me…or want to please me. I don’t even know what love feels like.”

  She was serious; I could tell. And I was utterly speechless.

  I laid her on the bed. She retrieved a condom from her briefcase and we made love passionately in several different positions like we knew each other from another life.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  LOURDES

  When I awakened after our heated night of passion, I felt Preacher’s warm body pressed against my back. This man moved me in ways I never knew were possible and I knew it was not meant for me to have him to myself. I felt like he was on loan and at some point I would have to return him to the world. Girls like me didn’t get the man…ever.

  Maybe that’s why I woke up wanting, craving, needing to get high. So much had been going on lately that I forgot that I hadn’t used dope in days. I guess running for my life and trying to figure out who Preacher really was kept my attention.

  Officer McDonough said I was going to have to find a way to get my mind off of drugs. Could Preacher be it? But at that moment, I woke up wanting and needing the sensation that kept me company for so long. Just once more.

  When I moved to get out of bed, Preacher placed his warm hand on my shoulder. “Where you going?” he asked, his moist breath brushing against my back.

  “I just need to get some air,” I said hoping he couldn’t sense my lie.

  “Don’t stay out there too long, Lourdes,” he yawned and rolled over. “We have a long day ahead of us.”

  “I won’t,” I smiled.

  When I eased out of bed, my toes pressed against the rough fibers of the carpet as I moved toward the bathroom. I realized that I hadn’t spoken to Officer McDonough since I left Baltimore. She was the first person who looked out for me since mama died and I felt the need to let her know that I was okay, despite everything that was going on. I also wanted to tell her personally that I couldn’t testify in court before I talked to Feather myself.

  Remembering that there was a phone in the bathroom on the wall, I went inside and shut the door. I would have to wait to find some dope. I removed the phone from the hook and dialed Officer McDonough’s number; I had it committed to memory.

  The moment I heard her low voice, I was overwhelmed with guilt. “Officer McDoough, it’s me, Lourdes.”

  “Oh my God,” she yelled. I heard the excitement to hear from me in her voice. It was as if she had been just speaking of me and I called. “Honey, where are you? Please tell me you’re okay.”

  I sat on the toilet seat and peered at the closed door in front of me. “I’m fine and I’m so sorry I worried you. It’s just that I needed to get out of Baltimore. I’m home.”

  “Lourdes, what do you mean you’re home? You’re not supposed to be in Texas! Please tell me where you are right now!”

  “I’ll be fine, trust me. Preacher…I mean Jamal is still with me and although a lot has been going on, I’m safe, for now anyway. And I was just calling to let you know that I’ve decided not to testify.” I didn’t tell her that I needed to speak to Feather first because I doubted that she could take it. “Please forgive me, Officer McDonough, but I can’t give you what you need right now. I’m sorry.”

  She exhaled.

  “This is a mistake. What if Jamal, or Preacher as you called him, leaves you?”

  Her words echoed in my head and it dawned on me. This man could have left if he wanted because we already had sex. Instead he wanted me to come back to bed.

  “Lourdes, I understand that you’re safe right now. I really do but you also need to know that Holliday burned down the home where you rented a room. Burned it to the ground. Nothing is here for you in Houston anymore.”

  My heart thumped around in my chest. Everything I loved, except my makeup, was in that room. Including pictures of my mama and photos from when I was a young girl. My entire life was in that little space. Holliday took everything from me, all because Feather murdered another child.

  “Lourdes, I hear you crying and I’m so sorry. I know you’re with the young man and you feel secure. But please I’m going to be worried sick if I don’t lay eyes on you. At least for a few minutes. Please come to the precinct so that I can talk to you.”

  “I can’t do that.”

  “At least tell me where you are. I promise I won’t come over. I just need to know that you’re okay, Lourdes. That’s all.”

  I could tell that she was troubled and I didn’t see any crime in telling her where I was. Besides, if something happened to me she was the only person outside of Preacher who would care. So I read her the address.

  When I was done I thought about the direction I planned to take my life. I wanted to make something of myself but I didn’t know what I planned to do. The oddest part was I realized that I was able to suppress my desire to get high. I didn’t know how things were going to turn out, but I was thankful to be living for the moment.

  I walked out of the bathroom and stood in the doorway with my hand on my hip. I looked at Preacher and smiled as he looked back at me.

  I think I was falling in love.

  ****

  THE HOLLIDAY RESIDENCE

  After Officer McDonough got off the phone with Lourdes, Morgan Holliday strapped her arms back to the chair. Morgan stood six-feet six-inches tall and resembled a basketball player. He rubbed his hand through his unruly bush and grinned down at her. His eyes were soulless and showed no compassion for anyone, including the good Officer.

  Although Morgan finally got what he wanted, Officer McDonough in his custody, it wasn’t easy. In order to get her to betray h
er badge, and Lourdes’ trust, he had to subject her to hours of grueling torture. First he punched her in the face repeatedly with a pair of brass knuckles. When he was afraid he would shatter her jaw and she would be unable to talk, he smashed her stomach with his fist, altering the positioning of her internal organs. But through it all, she held fast, until he employed a torture technique called water boarding.

  Morgan had his men place a towel over Mary’s face and then they poured water on top of it hour after hour. Before that, she was prepared to die instead of giving up Lourdes, but it became obvious that death was not what Morgan planned and she could not endure the torture. Because her breathing was inhibited, giving her the feeling like she was drowning, she relented and agreed to do whatever he asked.

  “You did good,” Morgan said to Mary, holding the piece of paper with Lourdes’ whereabouts in his hand. “I know this was hard for you but trust me, her death will be painless.” He handed the sheet to one of his men. “Go bring that bitch to me. If that nigga is with her, I want him too. They can be crippled, but make sure they’re alive.”

  “How?” his man asked, defiantly. “The boy Preacher has proven to be a handful. If you want me to go get him, I’m going to need at least three more men for backup.”

  “You’ll take one and then you’ll do what the fuck I asked. Now go,” he yelled pointing at the steps. Before his goon disappeared upstairs, Morgan said, “And if you come back here without both of them, I’m killing you instead.”

  “I got it, boss,” he responded, leaving before he grew angrier.

  Morgan focused back on Mary. “I swear…good help is hard to find.”

  “Instead of killing people and covering up for your daughter’s crimes, how about you get her some help,” Officer McDonough pronounced. Although she was in excruciating pain, she chose to remain brave. “Lourdes has been through hell recently and she just told me that she isn’t going to testify. Leave her alone. You don’t have to do this.”

  “You don’t know what the fuck you talking about,” he yelled, spraying spit on her face in the process. “You stick up for a woman you know nothing about. My daughter has been through hell and back and I would do anything for her. And that includes keeping her out of kiddie prison!” He sat in a chair across from her. “Besides,” he exhaled, “I tried everything I could to make Feather what the world deems as normal. But she’ll never forget what happened to her when I was in jail.”

  Hoping she could get through to his softer side, she said, “Morgan, I’m so sorry. And you’re right; I don’t know your daughter’s story. Can you tell me what happened?” It took everything in her power to remain civil instead of spitting in his face. Besides, this man’s daughter was responsible for the murder of her only child, even if she could never prove it.

  “I was in prison when I got the call that rocked my core. I was going to be a father. Feather’s mother wasn’t the best, she wasn’t even a good person, but she was the only person I had to take care of my child at the time. The problem was I was just handed down a five-year sentence for a robbery attempt. After I learned that this bitch was going to have my kid, I had her followed so that I could know the minute my daughter was born. I heard some things while she was pregnant, including the fact that she was doing drugs up until three months before my daughter’s birth.”

  “I’m sorry to hear—”

  He raised his hand stopping her immediately. “I don’t need sympathy from you or anybody else,” he said seriously. Looking up into the ceiling he exhaled. “My associates informed me that Feather was born with drugs in her system. When she got older, things got worse. At four years old, she would snap the heads off dolls and kill her pets within a few days of getting them. She was always, always violent. But when she killed for the first time, I didn’t know how to handle her. Since her mother failed, it was my responsibility to keep her safe. So I did what I had to do. I protected her.

  Officer McDonough’s bottom lip trembled. She was brimming with anger. “You’re speaking of my daughter right?”

  He chuckled loudly. “Your daughter? No, no, no, Mary. Your child was the fourth one Feather killed. At this point, Feather has killed over ten.”

  Upon hearing the hideous news, Feather came running down the steps. The click clack of her shoes resembled some strange theme music. Her doll-like features made her appear blameless, nothing like a killer. Her bang was cut sharply and the longer part of her hair rested neatly on her back. The red cashmere sweater she wore was buttoned all the way to the top and she donned a counterfeit smile on her face.

  Morgan stood up and kissed Feather gently on the top of her head. “Hi, baby girl.”

  “Hi, daddy,” she grinned before focusing on Officer McDonough as if she were meat. “Is she for me?”

  “Yes, honey, she is,” he said giving the officer a foreboding look. “Enjoy yourself.”

  “You’re the best daddy ever.”

  “I know.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  PREACHER

  The thick scent of our sex filled the air as I lay in the still quietness of the hotel room. There was a melodious sound coming from the window, some type of soulful music or perhaps it was the melody in my head, as Lourdes’ soft body lay next to me. With my hand resting on her breast, my morning erection pressed hard against the back of her thigh.

  I would always remember that moment, that feeling of bliss. Last night, until the early morning, we fucked like crazed rabbits, and then made love like lost lovers reunited. Afterward, Lourdes lay in my arms and we pillow talked. The whole while, the voice in my head was warning me, but the feeling was good, real good. I tried to negate that voice, the intrusive one that just barged right in whenever I was doing something wrong that felt so right.

  “You can’t be a sucker for love. You can’t change a whore and make her your house wife,” said the voice.

  It was telling me one thing but my heart was telling me something else. People did change. Lourdes, just like me, was capable of change. Many a whore has been changed, I kept telling myself because I knew it was true. My mama, God rest her soul, was once a drug addict whore and she changed.

  In the wee hours of the night, amongst succulent kisses, sensuous whispers, lingering endearment, Lourdes held me tight in her cocoon, with her legs wrapped around my torso; my hard manhood was buried deep inside her. Every woman’s sexuality is as unique as her personality, like an intricate fingerprint.

  Lourdes traced the scar on my chin with her lips and tongue, licking and sucking tenderly as we made love passionately. Riding the waves of a lustful tide, she moaned like an old song, music to my ears. I had the same symphony in my head when I woke up that morning.

  I watched as Lourdes got up and sashayed to the bathroom again. I felt her absence as I looked at her side of the bed empty with the sheets wadded at me feet. It felt so good to have her body next to mine.

  Last night, Lourdes confided in me that she had witnessed a murder and the authorities wanted her to testify. As my reality set in, my heart quaked and something else dawned on me; my own demons threatened to pounce. I too was running from something that I should have stayed and fought.

  “Fuck!” I said at my own idiocy.

  I placed my feet on the floor, ran my fingers through my hair. I reached for the duffle bag in search of my phone and found it. The first number I dialed was Weinstein’s. The call went straight to voicemail.

  Then I debated and hesitated. I wanted to call my grandmother but I couldn’t bear to listen to the heartbreak I had caused her nor the wrath of her anger. So, I called Tanya instead. I needed to talk to my daughter for the sake of hearing her voice.

  Just as I dialed the number, the bathroom door opened slowly with a squeak. Lourdes stood there; nude like a woman in a painting, and for the first time I noticed she was slightly bowlegged. I put the phone down.

  She placed her hand on her slender hip and smiled at me the way a woman does when they have just experienced good sex. Ag
ain it was one of those moments when she was looking sexy and exotic and wasn’t even conscious of it. I wanted to tear my eyes away from her but I couldn’t. Then she said something that completely caught me off guard.

  “Preacher…are you ashamed of me because I’m a whore?” She asked in a somber voice as she looked at me with intense eyes that held mine. It was like she had been eavesdropping on my thoughts.

  “I’m not ashamed of nothing I’ve ever done, especially with you.” I patted my lap for Lourdes to come sit. She padded over and sat down.

  “I can change. I mean, I want nothing more than to change. I just need a little help.” There was something about Lourdes at times that reminded me of a child yet she exuded raw beauty and bravery.

  “I don’t want you to change, especially if you’ll be my whore,” I said playfully and pinched her nipple.

  Lourdes’ body jerked and then she popped me on my arm. I could see the anger wash over her. “I don’t want to be a whore no more; I want to be with you.” She pouted and eased further in my lap placing her head in the crook of my neck.

  “I’ll pay you double,” I joked.

  She popped me on my arm again, we erupted in laughter.

  “I’m just playing, Lourdes; you can do anything you want to do if you put your mind to it. I mean I’ll help you if you want. I don’t know how long this mess is going to last but I’ma be here.” I caressed her hair and she nestled closer in my arms.

  “I know this is hard for you to believe, but I led a relatively boring life before you came into the picture. But the last few days have been like a roller-coaster ride. First you shot them dudes at the house and then we escaped the hotel and robbed the dudes who talked ill toward me. I can’t believe this is my life now.”

  “Them dudes on Belair Road shot at us first. And I’m certain that video will show it was self-defense. I’m still trying to contact my lawyer.”