Towards a Dark Horizon

by Maureen Reynolds

  I felt quite faint by all this talk of flowers and I thought I should be pulling my weight here instead of sitting eating a huge breakfast. ‘Can I do anything to help, Mrs Pringle?’

  She smiled. ‘No, thank you, Ann. I think everything is in order but my ankles are beginning to swell up and I hope I can get my new shoes on.’

  ‘Why do you not go and have a rest and put your feet up? When the flowers arrive, I’ll let you know.’

  ‘Do you know, Ann, that’s exactly what I’ll do.’ She set off for the lounge which was now bathed in warm sunshine.

  The flowers didn’t arrive till twelve o’clock by which time the entire household was going daft. In fact, Mrs Pringle was actually on the phone to the florist when the man arrived at the door with them.

  Maddie’s bouquet was lovely. It was done with white flowers mixed with a sprinkling of pale lemon blossoms while the bridesmaid and flower girls’ posies had blue and lemon flowers in them. Mine was identical to theirs but slightly larger. There were also three circlets of flowers for our heads, again in blue and lemon flowers.

  Then it was time to get dressed. I had a bath. The water was perfumed with Maddie’s bath crystals and I felt like a princess. Afterwards I dressed in Maddie’s bedroom while the girls were in Joy’s. Maddie stayed in her parents’ room until the car arrived to take us to the church.

  When she came out, the effect was breathtaking. Although I had seen the dress in the department store, it now looked so much better with the addition of a filmy veil and a white flowered headdress.

  Her father stood at her side and I could swear he had tears in his eyes but maybe it was merely a trick of the light.

  Lily and Joy were like little dolls and I was delighted by my appearance. The deep blue of the dress went well with my dark hair and the circlet of flowers matched exactly the ones on the girls’ heads.

  Mrs Pringle came with us and we left the bride alone with her father to await the bridal car. It was traditional for there to be a ‘scramble’ when the bridal car set off for the church. This involved the bride’s father tossing a couple of handfuls of low-denomination coins to the local children who would each do their utmost to pick up as much money as they could. In anticipation of this, a horde of children waited patiently in the street for Maddie and her dad to emerge from the house and head for the car. They were not disappointed. As the chauffeur drove off, Mr Pringle scattered a generous amount of money out of the car window. In their eagerness to collect the coins, some of the smaller children seemed oblivious to the possibility that they might get run over but the older ones had seen it all before and made sure this didn’t happen.

  At the church, loads of spectators had gathered. Everyone, it seemed, liked a wedding to look at. We stood inside the porch and I heard the rousing strains of the church organ. Suddenly I was filled with the sense of the occasion that had been missing. Up until that minute, I had been slightly cynical of all the religious trappings of a wedding but, now, in this lovely church, I felt overcome and touched by the solemnity of the building.

  Then Maddie arrived. The organ soared into the ‘Wedding March’ and we began our walk behind her down the long aisle. I saw heads turning and gasps of excited breath. Ma Ryan and all her family sat beside Granny and Grandad. On the opposite side sat all Maddie’s relations and friends. All had gathered there to witness the marriage of Maddie and Danny.

  Standing at the altar were Danny and Greg. I thought they looked nervous but they both also looked so handsome in their dark suits. I don’t think I had ever seen Danny looking so smart and good looking as he was that day. His red hair, normally so bouncy, was slicked down but I knew it wouldn’t last like that for long. Before the day was over, it would be like a red halo around his head.

  It was then that I realised how much I really loved him. Oh, not in the sense that Maddie loved him but more like a sisterly feeling of love. My mind flashed over all the years we had known one another – all the help and support he’d given me – and I knew then that we were truly grown-up. Our childhood lives were behind us.

  Then he glanced at Maddie and all the nervousness left his face. He smiled at her and she responded with such a wonderful look of love that I just knew they would both be very happy always. He glanced at Lily and Joy and gave me a grin but his special look was for Maddie and that was how it should be.

  Greg hadn’t turned as I stood beside the bride and I became anxious. Something was amiss and, whatever it was, I had no doubt I would soon find out – nothing was surer. I glanced at my ring which I wore on my right hand. I had hoped that Greg would perhaps place it on the left hand at the wedding meal but now I wasn’t so sure. But, for now, I let the minister’s words wash over me and the voices of the congregation rose with the sound of the organ playing ‘Love Divine’.

  Then it was over – far too soon, I thought. We found ourselves out in the autumn sunshine with the crowds of spectators peering through the railings. There were more photographs here and I knew it had been planned that others would be taken at the hotel.

  I was in the car with Maddie’s parents and her mother was crying. But it was tears of joy, she said – just tears of joy.

  14

  The garden at the hotel was a wonderful kaleidoscope of autumn tinted trees and banks of gold, bronze and crimson chrysanthemums. We posed for more photographs against this backdrop. Lily took her role so seriously and did all the things she was told by the photographer and the sun shone on all the proceedings.

  If Maddie and Danny were radiant, then so was Hattie. Mrs Pringle was smartly elegant in a navy suit and shoes with a picture hat in navy and white fabric. Meanwhile Hattie was gorgeous in a dress and jacket in almost the same colours as the crimson chrysanthemums. Her hat was a very simple cloche style that set off her dark hair to perfection.

  The guests were either in the garden or inside the posh-looking hotel lounge with its thickly carpeted reception area. Once all the photographs had been taken, we went inside too. We stood in a line and welcomed the guests. I was proud of my grandparents. Grandad wore his new pin-stripe suit with a white shirt and a blue tie. Granny looked ever so smart in a dress and coat in royal blue and a blue hat with a cream flower pinned at the side.

  Ma Ryan was dressed as usual in black but on this happy occasion she had livened it up with some white. Her close fitting hat looked like a remnant from the last century but everything she wore suited her and, although she hadn’t planned it, she too looked elegant.

  The Ryan girls wore an assortment of colours but they were also smart with their straw hats to match. Obviously the ‘Provie’ checks had stretched like a length of elastic because the men were all in dark suits with white shirts with starched collars.

  Meanwhile Bella was outstanding because of her hat. It was enormous in proportion to her face but the shop assistant had told her it was a hat suitable for a grand society wedding and the social side of her nature had swamped her common sense. Still she was enjoying herself and that was all that mattered.

  Then Kathleen appeared and I almost gasped. She was dressed simply in a pale green summer suit with her red hair tumbling on to her shoulders. Instead of a hat she wore a simple headband with tiny green flowers and the effect was stunning. There was no sign of Sammy but I noticed quite a few of the unattached males gazing at her with admiration – including Colin Matthews, the lad who worked in Maddie’s father’s office.

  Connie was standing beside Dad and Margot. Connie looked smart in a suit with a fox fur around her neck while Margot as usual was well dressed in a deep gold dress with matching hat and shoes. Dad gave me a glance as he passed and I was shocked by his thinness. His suit, which he’d bought for Harry’s funeral and which, at one time, had fitted him perfectly, was now almost hanging from his thin shoulders. Margot looked bored with his company and worry tightened in my stomach.

  Jean Peters and her husband were next and, although she didn’t say anything out of place, I could well imagine her summing u
p Margot.

  I’d almost resigned myself to not seeing Rosie and Alice when this voice spoke as she shook my hand. I didn’t recognise the smallish man with balding hair and a round cheery-looking face and I almost didn’t recognise Rosie.

  After the introductions were all over, I made a beeline for her. ‘Rosie, I didn’t know you – you’re looking great!’

  She beamed and introduced me to her friend. ‘This is Albert. He’s a friend from the Salvation Army and, when Mum couldn’t make it, I asked Maddie if I could bring him along and she said it was fine.’

  I almost laughed at her detailed description and bona fide references for Albert. Did she think I was the security officer detailed to throw out any gatecrasher? I said, ‘Rosie, you look wonderful.’

  She had lost some weight and now looked less podgy. Also her hair had been cut. Instead of the heavy and ponderous bun at the back of her neck, her hair now lay in a soft brown cap against her scalp. Like Kathleen, she had also opted for a hairband but hers had a tiny spotted veil attached. Her outfit clung to her figure and it was a smart dress in emerald green. What a difference to the old Rosie I thought. I told her so.

  Her face lit up. ‘I decided to take your advice, Ann, about changing my looks.’

  ‘Well, it’s worked wonders, Rosie.’

  I stood up as I had my other duties as chief bridesmaid to attend to. Dad was sitting a few feet away and he heard my voice. He looked over and his eyes almost popped out of his head when he saw Rosie – and not Rosie alone but with another man. He called me over but Margot gave me a sullen look.

  ‘I’ll see you later, Dad – it’s time to go into the dining room.’

  We all went through and the room was beautifully done up with large bowls of flowers in shades of white, yellow and blue. The top table was spread out within the large bay window while the other tables were circular and held ten people. The tablecloths were sparkling white and the silver cutlery shone brightly while the glasses glittered in the shafts of sunlight.

  For many, many years after, I was able to recall that scene. So much so that, every time I felt downcast or depressed, the remembrance of that day filled me with joy. As for Lily well she always referred to it as a magical, once-in-a-lifetime day.

  But, although we didn’t know it then, it was a golden sunny day of happiness before we all raced to our own dark horizons.

  Before the meal, one of Maddie’s uncles stood up and made an announcement. ‘Mr Neville Chamberlain has returned with a peace treaty. It’s to be peace in our time and there will be no war with Germany.’

  A cheer ran around the room and Maddie looked relieved. She had thought her married life might be short-lived but now everything looked rosy for them. Our futures were all assured.

  I caught a glance from Connie as she quietly listened and I saw her shake her head ever so slightly at the news. Then I saw Ma Ryan and she sat in silence with a strange look on her face when people cheered. Neither of these two women believed it but I wanted to – for all our sakes.

  The waitresses brought round plates of delicious food. Lily cleaned every plate until it was shining and almost not needing washed but I sat next to Joy and she hardly touched a morsel. What a queer world, I thought. There were children on the Hilltown and the Hawkhill who would be grateful for even a fraction of this lovely food while Joy didn’t seem to appreciate it.

  Greg then made his speech and he was really humorous. He told the guests of how he’d first met Maddie at the infirmary and said that her cool hands had aided his recovery. He then made a couple of funny anecdotes about Danny before becoming serious.

  ‘Today is a very happy day for Maddie and Danny. May they both have a long and happy life together.’ He held up his glass. ‘A toast to Maddie and Danny.’

  Everyone in the room echoed those sentiments and, now that the threat of war had been removed, it looked as if the future was secure – at least I fervently hoped so.

  During his speech he had said some words of praise to the bride’s attendants but, while he did glance at me when he was speaking, I was alarmed to see his eyes had a blank look. Lily, however, didn’t notice anything wrong and she visibly beamed at his admiring words. She was too young to realise nearly all weddings had these speeches and she truly believed he was telling her she was the best flower girl in all the world. But let her have her little illusions, I thought. Life was too serious and scary not to have a fantasy bolthole to escape into.

  It was then that I noticed that Dad and Margot had been seated at the same table as Maddie’s Uncle John and his wife Dorothy. Margot was hogging John all to herself as she leaned towards him and whispered in his ear. Dorothy was not amused by this behaviour and her thin gaunt face had twin patches of red on her cheeks. Dad also looked like thunder and I felt sorry for him – especially when it seemed that Rosie was having a whale of a time at the next table. She and Albert were having a great conversation with the rest of the table guests and the topic must have been funny because, every now and again, they all burst out laughing.

  Dad glanced over to her table and his eyes lingered on her for a full minute. As if conscious of this gaze, she looked over and blushed at the intensity of his eyes.

  Then the meal was over and we all drifted through to the lounge. The Pringles had booked a four-piece band for dancing but at the moment we were all waiting about as the band set up their instruments. It was a hiatus in the otherwise busy day.

  I glanced around the elegant room. The Ryan families were sitting with some of Maddie’s relations and they were all listening to Ma. Maddie and Danny were sitting with my grandparents and Bella while Dorothy was beside Joy and Lily. She didn’t look happy.

  I knew I would have to do my social rounds soon but the old weariness swept over me and, although these spells were now very seldom, I still had them from time to time. I suddenly felt so tired and realised I needed to sit down by myself for a while. I knew there was a room where the coats were being kept. In fact, the hotel had hired a woman to check them in for safekeeping – not so much for our side of the family but Maddie’s female relations had some lovely fur coats with them. I had noticed a small room next to this cloakroom. It had a couple of soft chairs so I decided to retreat there for a short rest.

  The woman in charge of the coats had gone. Perhaps she’d nipped off for a cup of tea but the room was empty. So I didn’t go into the small room because this room had a large bay window with a padded seat in front of it. The room also had a lovely view of the river.

  I sank thankfully on to this window seat and gazed out at the view. The setting sun was casting a golden glow over the water. Everything was so peaceful and it was hard to think just how near we were to war with Germany. Thank goodness it had been averted, I thought.

  I had seen so little of Greg but I knew he had his duties as best man to see to and I knew he couldn’t help that. I heard the door open quietly and I turned, feeling not too pleased to have my reverie interrupted. But it was only Rosie and she moved almost silently over the thick carpet.

  ‘I thought I saw you come in here. What a great wedding it’s been and we’ve really enjoyed ourselves.’ Her face was flushed with the heat of the room but it suited her.

  I spoke quietly. ‘You look like a million dollars, Rosie.’

  She blushed a deeper red but she was pleased by my words, I could tell.

  ‘I decided to tog myself up and although it’s too late for your father, maybe another man will be interested.’

  I was curious about Albert. ‘What about the man you came with?’

  ‘Och, he’s a great man but he lost his wife last year and they were both good friends of mine in the Salvation Army. We met up again when I rejoined after your father got married but it’s just a friendship.’

  I opened my mouth to answer when we heard the angry words from the small annexe. It was Margot’s voice. She was talking very loudly and she sounded angry. ‘Well, I’m warning you, John, if you don’t start divorce procee
dings against that silly, cow-faced wife of yours, then I’ll tell her everything about us.’

  John’s voice rose in anger as well. ‘Tell her what, Margot? That I’ve been a stupid fool but now I’ve come to my senses? Will you tell her that I’ve now decided to stop playing a silly fool? Is that what you’ll tell her?’

  Rosie and I both got to our feet and made silently for the door. But before we reached it, Margot shouted, ‘I’m still going to leave that stupid man I married. What a mistake that was!’

  When John spoke, his voice was harsh. ‘Don’t you dare run down your husband like that. He’s a decent hard-working man who deserves better than you.’

  Her voice took on a pleading tone. ‘I only married him to make you jealous – you know that. You know I only ever wanted you, and I thought, when Harry found out about us and it finished him, then we would be married. One thing I’m certain of is the fact that I’m not staying married to that idiot and his impoverished family a minute longer. Supposed to have an heiress as a daughter. Well, I’ve seen precious little of that legacy I can tell you.’

  John’s voice became quiet but it wasn’t a pleasant sound. ‘That’s all you’ve ever cared for, isn’t it, Margot? Money – you’ll do almost anything to get your hands on it. I don’t want to ever see you again and I must have been mad to think I ever did.’

  Thinking that either Margot or John must come through the annexe door and in to the room where we were, Rosie and I darted for the cover in an alcove at the far end of the room.

  As we reached the safety of our hiding place, we saw, to our dismay and horror, that a figure was sitting in a chair. It was Dad and he had tears in his eyes. He looked at us and we could tell by his face that he was in shock. Letting out a small cry, Rosie ran out of the room.