Find Me (The Donovan Family Book 3)

by Margaret Watson

  The place between Lizzy's shoulder blades itched. After following her all the way to Skipjack, she didn't think Jacobsen would just run for Canada. He was going to find her.

  She wanted to reach for Franny's collar. She would say she was taking Franny out, then disappear. Mac would be furious, but he'd be safe if she was gone. So would his sister and brothers.

  She should go, for their sakes. But she'd promised she'd stay.

  She looked around the table. All five of the Donovans were here, helping Mac. Helping her. They didn't run when the going got rough. They stuck together. They helped each other.

  The Donovans didn't run away.

  She wouldn't, either.

  ***

  As she stood up to pace, to wear off some of her nervous energy, Mac finally broke into the clamor of everyone talking at once. "So we've got two scenarios. I know the guy. I think he's coming here. So we'll plan for that."

  "Wait a minute, hot shot," Connor said. "Maybe the rest of us have a different opinion. Let's take a vote."

  Lizzy watched a muscle in Mac's jaw tense, then release. He nodded. "Fair enough. Who thinks Jacobsen would go to Canada?"

  Mia, Brendan, Connor and Quinn raised their hands.

  Mac looked from one of his siblings to the other. "I'm the one who knows him, but I'm the only one who thinks he's coming here?"

  "I think so, too," Lizzy said.

  Mac glanced at her. Instead of telling her to let the professionals make the decisions, he nodded. "Four to two, then."

  His siblings were wrong. Jacobsen wasn't in Canada.

  She needed to run.

  But she couldn't do it. All she could do was stay with him and pray that Mia, Brendan, Connor and Quinn were right. That Jacobsen was somewhere in Canada by now.

  Even though every instinct was screaming that Jacobsen was coming for her.

  ***

  An hour later, Mac watched Brendan follow Lizzy and Franny out through the kitchen and into the back yard. She'd said that Franny needed some exercise, and Brendan had volunteered to go with her. Mac wanted to grab her and keep her in the house. Where he could see her. He didn't want Lizzy out of his sight until Jacobsen was in a cell.

  She was their only witness against his colleague, and it was his job to protect her. He didn't want to take any chances with her safety.

  He closed his eyes. Right. Lizzy was far more than a job. Far more than a witness he had to protect. He couldn't think about how much more until Jacobsen was no longer a threat.

  "How's she doing?" Connor asked as soon as the door closed behind the trio.

  Mac shrugged, hoping his brother would buy his nonchalance. "You see as much as I do. What do you think?"

  "Really, Mac?" Mia asked, rolling her eyes so hard he was surprised they didn't fall out. "'We see as much as you do'? That's what you're going with?"

  "What am I supposed to say, Mia?" It would be far too childish to stick his tongue out at his sister, the way he did when he was thirteen. "She's fucking terrified, but she's trying to hide it. She's as tough as you. Maybe tougher."

  "Yeah," Mia said softly, leaning back. "I can see that. Sorry I poked at you." She rubbed a hand over her eyes. "We're all tense."

  "I know." Mac reached over the table and clasped his sister's hand for a moment. She'd given up her day off to stay here and help protect Lizzy. Brendan, Connor and Quinn had also finagled time off. The least he could do was not snap at them. "Thanks for being here, Mimo."

  She turned her hand to return his clasp. "Wouldn't be anywhere else, Macky."

  Mac's lips twitched. Tender moment over. "Call me that in front of Lizzy and die."

  Pleased at his reaction, Mia grinned. Mac smiled back. As much as they squabbled, he'd protect her with his life. He knew she'd do the same. Hell, all of them would step in front of a bullet for each other.

  Now they were volunteering to step in front of a bullet for Lizzy, too. His throat swelled and he jumped up from the table. "What now, guys?"

  "I know a guy over at immigration," Connor offered. "I can ask him to check and see if Jacobsen crossed into Canada."

  "I'll stake out Jacobsen's place. See if he shows up," Quinn said.

  "I could sniff around the precinct," Mia said. "Talk to Cooper and Jennings, see if there's any way they might have missed Jacobsen."

  They were assuming they'd all split up, since Jacobsen hadn't been on the plane. Logically, that made sense, but Mac's skin prickled with unease. He wanted an army surrounding Lizzy.

  "That would work, I guess," he said slowly. "We'll see what Brendan thinks."

  "You worried about being here alone with Lizzy?" Mia managed to say it with a straight face, but Mac saw the twinkle in her eye. "Want one of us to stay to protect your virtue?"

  A rush of heat arrowed straight to Mac's groin. No protection would be needed. He was pretty sure Lizzy wanted him as much as he wanted her. "Appreciate the offer, but I'll pass." He cleared his throat. "When Lizzy and Brendan come in, though, we should talk about our strategy. Should you guys leave? Or stick around?"

  Before they could answer, the back door opened and Mac heard Brendan and Lizzy laughing. He bristled, knowing he was an idiot. But, damn it, he didn't want to be Captain Serious all the time. He wanted to be the one to make Lizzy laugh.

  "Man, you should see Franny," Brendan said, bending to pet the dog. "She's amazing! She can jump three feet in the air to catch a Frisbee."

  "Glad you had fun playing with the dog while we've been figuring out how to catch Jacobsen," Mac said.

  Lizzy slid into the seat next to him and brushed her fingers over his arm. "Don't blame Brendan. It was my fault. Franny was getting squirrelly from lack of exercise. She needed the workout."

  Mac sighed and scrubbed his hands over his face. He was being a jerk. "I know. Sorry, Bren," he said to his brother. "Not being able to do anything is driving me crazy."

  "It's making us all nuts," Brendan answered easily. "I get it."

  Mac nodded. Apology given and accepted. "We were talking about our next step. Should we split up? Or all of us stay here?"

  As Mia, Quinn and Connor described what they would do, Mac's phone alarm rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and frowned at the notation.

  "Mom hasn't called yet," he said. "She was supposed to call an hour ago.

  Everyone went silent.

  Finally, Mia said, "You know how she gets with Helen. They're probably gabbing and Mom's forgotten all about calling." If he didn't know Mia so well, Mac wouldn't have noticed the tiny quiver in her voice.

  "Yeah." Quinn drummed his fingers on the table. "Give her a call."

  Mac tapped Rose's phone number and counted the rings. When he got to seven, his stomach began to churn. When the phone went to voicemail, he turned it off and set it carefully on the table. "She's not answering."

  Chapter 22

  They all stared at each other, frozen in place. Finally, Connor said, "Q, you sure no one followed you to Helen's?"

  Instead of getting defensive or angry, as he would have if Mac asked, Quinn shook his head at his twin. "Positive. I doubled back, watched everything behind me. Unless they had five different cars, Mom got to Helen's clean." He pushed away from the table. "I'm going to check on them."

  "Hold on a minute." Mac waved him into his seat. "I didn't tell Mom to stay put at Helen's. Did you, Quinn?"

  "Yeah, I mentioned it. Not sure she was paying attention, though. She was too busy talking to Helen's belly."

  Mac turned to Lizzy, who was looking bewildered. "Helen's Mom's sister. She's pregnant with her first kid."

  "And thank God for that," Quinn added. "Keeps her off my back about when I'm going to marry Tessa and give her grandkids."

  Lizzy frowned, and Mac saw her doing the calculations in her head. "Your mom has a sister who's pregnant with her first child?"

  "Mom is a lot older than Helen. Twenty-one years, I think. Anyway, Mac is thirty-three and Helen is thirty-six," Mia explained. "She'
s more like a cousin than our aunt. She was Grandma's little surprise."

  "They're probably in the nursery, getting all worked up about the color of the sheets or some shit like that," Brendan said.

  No one looked at anyone else. Mac wanted to kick himself into the middle of next week. He'd sent their mother to her pregnant sister's house. He was an idiot.

  What had he been thinking?

  He looked around the table at his siblings. At Lizzy. He thought about his mom and Helen, pregnant with her first child. His family. Who would he be without them?

  Not the man he was today, that was for damn sure.

  Mac picked up the phone and called again. He hoped Lizzy couldn't see his hand trembling. He should have kept Rose here. Kept Helen out of this.

  It went to voicemail again, and this time, Mac said, "Mom. Call me." He sent her a text as well. Covering his bases. Then he called Helen, who didn't pick up, either. He left her the same message.

  "I'll give them fifteen minutes," Quinn said. "Then I'm on my way."

  The minute hand on the ornately carved wooden clock on the wall looked like it was stuck. It didn't move. Vivid movies were playing in his head of Jacobsen holding his mother and Helen at gunpoint. Or forcing them into his car to use them as hostages.

  Helen would cross her arms over her belly, protecting her baby. His mother would be his mother and be ragging on Jacobsen. Telling him what a coward he was. Asking him what his mother would think of him now.

  He shook his head violently, trying to rid himself of the images and the inevitable bad ending. It took every bit of his restraint to stay in the chair and not charge over to Helen's house.

  Mia shoved aside the living room curtain and studied the street. Quinn joined her and murmured something. She shook her head.

  "Call her again," Brendan finally said, pushing out of his chair. "Christ. Couldn't she, just once, follow directions?" He stalked into the kitchen and the sound of a fist cracking into the wall echoed in the dining room.

  The minute hand crawled to the next mark on the clock. One more minute until he called. His hand tightened on his phone. He glanced at Lizzy, whose face was pinched with fear. He cupped her cheek, brushed his thumb over her mouth. She turned her face into his hand and closed her eyes.

  Just before the minute hand could move again, his phone rang.

  He took a moment to steady himself. What if it was Jacobsen? What would Mac say when he demanded Lizzy in exchange for his mom and Helen?

  He glanced at the screen and swallowed as he pressed the 'call' icon too hard. "Mom. Are you all right? Is Helen okay?"

  "We're fine, Mac. I just got your message."

  Mac closed his eyes and exhaled as he heard the guilt in her voice. "What were you doing?"

  "We were looking at paint chips for the baby's room. Comparing them to pictures of the furniture Helen wants. We forgot to bring our phones upstairs. I'm sorry."

  Mac bit down the angry words he wanted to say. He was too thankful they were all right. "Next time, will you set the alarm on your phone so you remember to call?"

  "Let's hope there isn't a 'next time'."

  He rolled his eyes. Rose getting the last word again. "None of us want that, either. Is Jamie home yet?"

  "Helen's been looking at her watch. He must be due home soon."

  "Do me a favor. Make sure all the doors and windows are locked, and don't answer the door tonight."

  "Okay. We can do that."

  "Thanks, Mom. Call me at ten. And set your alarm."

  "Yes, Cormac."

  Mac barely resisted rolling his eyes at his mother's tone. "Bye, Mom."

  He looked up to find everyone watching him. "Looking at paint and baby furniture," he said.

  "Thanks for taking ten years off my life, Mom," muttered Brendan.

  This was why his job mattered. Why it was so important. He protected people. Kept them safe.

  He glanced at Lizzy, who had slumped back in his chair. But maybe his job didn't have to be the only thing in his life.

  For the first time, he didn't want it to be.

  Couldn't think about what he did want, or he wouldn't be able to focus. "Okay, let's figure out what we're going to do," Mac said, forcing images of Lizzy, swollen with his child, out of his head.

  "Before we do that, G-Man, why don't you use your federal powers to check all the flights from Seattle and Portland into Chicago today," Mia said. "Make sure the dirtbag isn't on another flight."

  "Good idea, Mia." He pulled the laptop toward him, logged on again and did a search. "Nothing," he said, exhaling. "He's not on any flight on any airline."

  "Okay. Since Jacobsen isn't in town, we should split up and do our checking," Connor said.

  Brendan nodded. "Sounds good. I'll go back to my precinct and talk to some of the vice guys about the tongs in Chinatown. See if they have any insights."

  "Right," Mac said. "Meet back here tomorrow at eight AM?"

  All four of his siblings agreed, then piled out the door. Mac watched them drive away, aware of Lizzy standing next to him.

  The clock ticking in the dining room was startlingly loud. So was the floor board that squeaked as he pulled the shades and drew Lizzy away from the windows.

  "Awfully quiet all of a sudden," Lizzy said.

  "Yeah. The Donovans are loud."

  "Your brothers and Mia are...they're amazing. They're doing all this for someone they don't even know." She swallowed, and Mac saw a sheen in her eyes. "They're risking their lives for me!"

  He wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her neck, the way he'd been aching to do all day. "We watch out for each other," he murmured. Her hair tickled his face, and he tucked it behind her ear. "We may fight, but we always have each other's back."

  He leaned back and waited until she met his gaze. "I'll always have your back, Lizzy."

  She paled. "Always is a long time." Lizzy twined her fingers with his and swallowed. "A lot can happen between now and always,” she said softly.

  He wanted to tell her he'd have her back for as long as she'd let him. But he saw the shadows in her gaze. She was thinking about her father, who had probably said the same thing and died protecting her.

  "No one's going to get hurt," he said, squeezing her hands. "We're all being careful. Paying attention. We know what we're doing."

  "I know. I can tell." She tried to smile, and he brushed his mouth over hers. Lizzy didn't believe in always or forever. He wanted to prove that she was wrong.

  "Come on. Let's get some dinner. You can tell me how you trained Franny The Amazing Frisbee Catcher."

  ***

  Four hours later, Mac grabbed the remote and turned off the television. As much as he'd enjoyed slouching into the couch with Lizzy, his arm draped over her shoulder, he needed to turn off the noise. The laugh track from the comedy show sounded forced. Just like the upbeat, positive vibe he'd tried to convey all evening. He was afraid Lizzy wasn't buying it anymore than he was.

  "You ready for bed?" he asked, his hand tightening on her shoulder.

  She nodded, and the muscles in her throat rippled as she swallowed. Had she been dreading this moment? Wondering how awkward it was going to be?

  "This is what I've been thinking," he said, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. "We should sleep on this floor tonight – it'll be easier to hear anyone prowling around. And we don't want to be trapped upstairs with no way out."

  He jerked his head toward the bedroom off the living room. "Not in my mom's room – the windows open to the front porch. Easy access. But I'm pretty sure there are air mattresses in the basement. We'll blow those up, grab some blankets and pillows and sleep in the dining room."

  It was the most protected room on the first floor. Jacobsen hadn't been on any of the flights to Chicago, but he might not have been working alone. Mac wasn't going to take any chances. "Does that work for you?"

  "That sounds good. I was...I was wondering. What we would do. Should we take turns staying awake? Lis
tening?"

  He knew what he wanted to do. He wanted to spend the night making love to her. Just the thought of it sent a bolt of heat to his groin.

  They couldn't, of course. He had to focus on protecting Lizzy. On keeping her safe. But one kiss wouldn't hurt. One kiss that would have to hold him until it was safe to do more than kiss.

  He pressed his mouth to hers, savoring her taste. Exploring her lips. Enjoying the way they quivered against his. As if she was holding herself back, too.

  Once he'd started, he couldn't stop. He kissed her until she melted against him. Her breasts pressed into his chest, her nipples points of fire through their shirts. She cradled his erection against her belly, a ragged groan deep in her throat as she moved against him.

  Her fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer. Holding him against her. Desire, need and desperation tangled together inside him, until all he wanted was to strip away her clothes and lay her on the couch. Slide deep inside her and stay there forever.

  His hands crept beneath her shirt, trailed over her warm, silky skin. Her breath caught, and she gripped him more tightly. She wasn't going to stop him.

  It was up to him. Every cell in his body screamed for him to continue. To make love to her the way they both wanted. But if they did, Mac knew an army could storm through the front door and he wouldn't notice.

  He eased his body away from hers, so the only place they were connected was their mouths. He touched her lower lip with his tongue, tasted her one last time, then broke the kiss.

  She dragged her eyes open. Sleepy, aroused bedroom eyes that had him clenching his fists to keep from dragging back against him. "Mac?"

  "We can't," he said. The hardest two words he'd ever spoken. "Not now. After we catch Jacobsen? Then all bets are off. I won't let you out of bed for weeks."

  She smoothed her hands down the front of her shirt, straightening it. Then she combed her hand through the tangles in her hair. The flush was fading from her cheeks and she held his gaze. Nodded. "You're right. I...I wasn't thinking."