by Penelope Sky
We both showered so we wouldn’t smell like sex and then headed to the winery. We didn’t talk about her brother’s visit last night, probably because nothing about it was surprising. Conway hated me like everyone else.
Not exactly news.
We drove in silence, Vanessa sipping her coffee in the passenger seat with her sunglasses on her nose. She wore a red sundress today, low-cut in the front with her hair curled and pulled to the side. She wore a small sun hat, fitting in with the Tuscan countryside perfectly. This place was in her blood.
I knew the men who came to the wine tasting would stare at her all afternoon.
But they couldn’t have her—she was mine.
We arrived at the winery then hopped out of the truck. She was heading into a different building, so I walked her to the cobblestone patio and then peered down at her, tempted to kiss her.
She gave me a slight smile, knowing exactly what I was thinking. “See you later.”
I hated staring at her like this, staring at her like I couldn’t have her. No one was around, but I didn’t want to cross the line and piss off her father for the afternoon. He was looking for any reason to get rid of me, so I couldn’t risk putting him in a bad mood.
She moved her hand to my forearm and gave me a gentle squeeze.
“Yeah. See you later.” I turned away and let her hand slid away from my arm. I walked into the warehouse where the wine was filtered and processed. Wine was bottled and then the bottles placed in boxes. My job was to move those heavy boxes and prepare them for shipments. It was hard labor, but I was committed to outperforming any other worker they had.
They would never acknowledge it. But at least I would know.
I got to work and immediately worked up a sweat, the moisture darkening my neckline, underneath my arms, and along my back. Sweat formed on my forehead, but I kept working through the morning, knowing my woman was across the way, refilling wine for her customers. She looked beautiful in that red dress with her dark skin. Her mascara made her eyelashes thicker, and her eyeliner brought out the natural color of her eyes. I smiled as I thought about her, the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
And she was mine.
Crow stepped inside the warehouse, dressed in all black. A pistol sat on his hip. He scanned the warehouse before he looked at me.
I knew he didn’t wear a gun at work on a regular basis. His toy was just for me.
How flattering.
I kept working, assuming he was looking for something else besides me.
Crow walked up to me, his muscular shoulders stretching his t-shirt. His black wedding ring sat on his left hand, the metal reflecting the sunlight that came through the windows. His dark gaze was on me, telling me had something to say.
I wiped my hands on my jeans then straightened, meeting his gaze with my own. I never knew what Crow was going to throw my way. He was unpredictable, keeping his thoughts deep behind his eyes. He had a great poker face.
Crow moved his hands to his hips, his hand dangerously close to his gun.
I was always afraid of the moment I was dreading, the moment when he would tell me to leave Vanessa and disappear. It was my worst nightmare. The longer I was with Vanessa, the harder I fell. She was such an incredible woman, so strong and so compassionate. She put up with her family’s hatred of me, but she somehow remained loyal to both of us at the same time. If she wasn’t such a good artist, she should have been a diplomat.
Crow seemed unsure what he wanted to say, because he kept staring at me like he was indecisive.
I wanted to start the conversation, but I was too afraid to come off sarcastic or cold.
Crow finally found the right words. “Come with me.” He turned around and left the warehouse.
I watched him go, wondering where he wanted to take me. I followed a second later, trailing behind him across the dirt to the first building that housed the restaurant and entryway. Once we turned down the hallway, I realized we were going to his office.
Which meant he wanted to talk.
Shit.
This could be it.
The moment he took away the greatest thing that had ever happened to me.
We stepped inside his office and shut the door, and Crow sat on one of the couches in front of his desk. He had a bottle of scotch on the coffee table along with two glasses. He rested his elbows on his knees and stared at the spot where he wanted me to sit.
I lowered myself across from him, my hands coming together. It was the first time I’d ever been nervous around him. Any other time, I was fearless, refusing to let any man intimidate me. But now, I was scared. Scared that this man had so much power over me. I told him I would leave his daughter if he asked—and I had to keep my word.
I just hoped he didn’t ask me to do it.
How could I wake up every morning without her beside me? How could I find another woman to please me and not think about Vanessa? How could I live a life without her light, her love? I’d never been dependent on anyone for anything, but now I’d become dependent on Vanessa for my happiness.
She was my whole fucking world.
I helped myself to the bottle and poured two glasses.
Crow didn’t take his. He kept staring at me, looking at me like he wasn’t sure what to say again.
Since this silence could go on forever, I started talking. “Don’t take her away from me. I’m not the kind of man who begs, not even for his life. But I’ll beg for her. I wasn’t a good man before we met, but she’s made me into one. She’s my world. I’m not ashamed to say it. I’m not ashamed to admit that I need her.”
Her father was just as stoic as before, looking at me like I hadn’t said anything at all.
I preferred his insults to this silence. I couldn’t read him—at all.
He lowered his head and looked at his hands for a moment. “I don’t like you. I’ll never like you. I don’t trust you, especially around my family. But…I’m going to try to accept you. I think you really love my daughter, and I know she loves you. So…let’s have a drink.”
I repeated every single word inside my head, treasuring those words like they were gold. He insulted me at first, but then he said what I wanted to hear. He gave me the chance I’d been working for. He gave me the opportunity to keep Vanessa. I knew that was hard for him to do, that his paranoia was warning him this was a terrible idea, but he was putting himself at risk—for this daughter.
“I’ve never really tried with you. I’ve been too busy insulting you. My brother punched you. The list goes on. So…tell me something about yourself. Something that won’t make me want to kill you.” He grabbed his glass and brought it to his lips for a drink.
I didn’t know what changed his mind—and so abruptly. Vanessa and I hadn’t done anything differently. I’d kept my head down and tried to be as nonthreatening as possible, and Vanessa was still fighting for me. Nothing seemed to have changed. “I wasn’t expecting this.”
“I said I’m trying to accept you,” he said coldly. “Never said I already had.” He drank from his glass again. “So, tell me something about yourself.”
There weren’t many topics we could touch. My childhood was off-limits, and my adult life was even worse. “I’m not that interesting. My life only became worth discussing when I met Vanessa.”
“Then tell me something about her.”
I grabbed the glass and held it between my fingertips, thinking about all the things I couldn’t say. Like the way her mouth parted when she came, the way her voice deepened to such a powerful tone when she exploded around my dick, and the way she whispered her love when I was buried deep inside her. “When she paints…she has this cute look on her face. Like, she’s doubting herself through every step of the process. She stops and thinks about the next place she’s gonna place her brush a long time before she finally commits, because she knows every move she makes is permanent. She’s not just artistic, but pragmatic.”
“She was always secretive about her artwork.
She never allowed us to watch her process. I’m surprised she allows you to do it.” It was the first time Crow had said something back to me, a reply that wasn’t hostile. It was just a rebuttal, the second part of the dialogue.
“She doesn’t. I watch her when she thinks I’m not looking.”
Crow drank from his glass, his eyes on me.
“In her art room, there’s a large window that stretches from the floor to the ceiling. When I stand in the doorway, I can see her reflection. That’s how I see her face when she’s painting, the way she deliberates before placing the brush in the paint.”
He set the glass down then wiped his lips with the back of his forearm.
“She’s a very easygoing person, but when it comes to her artwork, she’s very serious. She cares about it deeply, but that’s not surprising considering how talented she is. I don’t know anything about art, but I know her art is…there are no words.” When we talked about Vanessa, our conversation didn’t seem so tense and forced. “What was she like as a child?”
“Selfish, bratty, a little know-it-all,” her father said bluntly. “But adventurous, beautiful, and strong. They said fathers push their sons harder than their daughters because they expect more out of them. That wasn’t true in her case. I spent far more time pushing Vanessa to be a strong and capable woman like her mother. Fortunately, Conway didn’t seem to care too much. He was ready to be a man by the time he was sixteen, ambitious, serious, independent…” He looked at his glass as he remembered her childhood. “I taught her how to fight, how to handle a gun, how to think critically …which explains how she escaped Knuckles. I told her to never wait around for a man to save her, not even me. I taught her to save herself.”
“I see a lot of her in you…and vice versa.”
“Not sure if that’s a compliment.”
I’d hated the Barsettis for so long, but spending time with them had taught me to respect them. They were honest, honorable, and compassionate. If Crow didn’t love his daughter so much, he wouldn’t be sitting with me right now. “It is. It’s the reason I fell in love with her in the first place. She has bigger balls than most men I’ve met. She stood up to me when men twice her size would have shit their pants. She didn’t hesitate to try to kill me, unlike most women. She’s told me off more times than I can count… I never knew that was the kind of woman I was looking for. Headstrong, confident, fierce…I respect her. She’s the first woman who didn’t just earn my respect, but commanded it. I see where she gets it.”
He picked up the glass, lightly tapping the side with his finger. “When I met my wife, she was the same way. Outnumbered and outgunned, she stood no chance at all. But that didn’t stop her from fighting. She put me in my place so many times. I respected the way she never stopped fighting. And I wished that my sister had been the same way…had fought harder and longer.” His eyes lifted up to meet my gaze, pain in his look. “I was close with my sister the way Conway and Vanessa are close. Conway looks after her even when I’ve never asked him to. They argue, but he loves her with all his heart. When I told him you were in the picture, he said his sister was amazing and deserved better, deserved the best. I wish I could tell Vanessa what he said, but he forbade me.”
“She already knows.”
He set his glass down, the condensation making a ring on the wood. “It’s been over thirty years, but I’ve never gotten over it. When my parents were gone, my sister turned into a daughter to me. As the oldest son, I became responsible for my two siblings. I was there when your father pulled the trigger. I watched the bullet enter her skull and spray blood everywhere. Her eyes had been on me at the time, and when she was dead, they just glossed over… It’s the kind of shit you never forget.” He grabbed his glass and took another deep drink. “Your father told me to bring twenty million, and he would make the trade—her life for the cash. I showed up and did exactly as he asked. He took the money and killed her anyway.” He looked at me, his gaze full of accusation, like I’d been present that very night.
We were supposed to keep the conversation light, but we’d somehow returned to our roots. “I’m sorry.” My apology meant nothing in this situation. His sister’s death wasn’t my fault, but as my father’s son, I felt obligated to right the wrong.
“Sorry for what?”
“My father wasn’t a good man. He did something unforgivable to your family. I can’t apologize for what he did because I wasn’t alive when this happened. But I am sorry for wanting to follow in his footsteps, for ever wanting to hurt your family in the first place. You’re good people…you deserve better.”
“Don’t kiss my ass.”
“I’m not.” I set my glass down and rested my elbows on my knees. “I think you’re blindly stubborn and need to let go of the past. I think your brother is a hotheaded idiot, and you’re the arrogant but pragmatic one. I’m not afraid to be real with you. But I do acknowledge the wrong my family committed against you. I never should have wanted vengeance. I shouldn’t have been so stubborn and narrow-minded. My father provoked your family in the first place. He’s the perpetrator, and you’re the victim. I see a lot of Vanessa in her mother, and knowing what my father did to Pearl starting to make me a little sick…” I took a long drink of my scotch and returned the glass to the table. “Now that I love a woman with all my heart, I constantly want to protect her. The idea of something like that happening to her… I don’t even want to talk about it.”
Crow kept a straight face even though discussing this probably killed him inside. “My wife is a survivor, not a victim. That’s not how I see her. That’s not how she sees herself. Would never want her to view herself in any other way.”
“When are you going to talk to Vanessa?”
He shrugged. “I’m not sure. My wife has made peace with the past. She’s been happy for a long time. To stir up those memories will just bring her down. It’ll be hard for her to talk about it, especially with her daughter.”
“I can imagine…”
Crow opened the bottle again and refilled the glasses. “Do you watch sports?”
“Occasionally. You?”
“Never.”
“Then what do you do?”
“I work then go home to my wife,” he said. “What else would I do?”
“Sounds kinda boring,” I teased.
“You think so?” he questioned. “Then what’s your day like?”
“I work in the morning and then…” My voice trailed away when I realized my life was the same as his. I immediately went to Vanessa, watching TV on the couch or making dinner together in the kitchen. My whole life revolved around her. There were no more parties or late evenings on the town. Everything else had been sacrificed to accommodate for the diamond in my life.
Crow gave a slight smile before he drank from his glass. “Look who’s boring now.”
“Yeah…guess so.”
He set his glass down. “I’ve talked to my wife about this situation many times. It’s all we talk about now. I mentioned the similarities between our relationships and asked her about it…asked if she would change anything. Her answer was no…that there wasn’t a better man for her out there. She didn’t have any regrets, any moments when she wondered if she’d made the wrong decision. She wonders if you’re right for Vanessa…and we just can’t see it right now.”
“I am right for her.” I fought for her every single day, and I wasn’t going to downplay my confidence. “I’m the only person man enough for her. I make her stronger, and she makes me the strongest man on the planet. I don’t come in a pretty package, but you don’t want me to come in a pretty package. I’m like a guard dog that scares everything off. You can sleep well knowing I’m taking care of her.”
He shook his head slightly. “I don’t feel that way at all.”
He’d insulted me a lot, but none of his taunts ever pierced me as deeply as that one.
“I’m constantly worried about her. My dying wish is to know my two children are safe. With Van
essa, I don’t feel that way. I’m afraid I’ve given her the foolish belief that she’s invincible. She thinks she can handle you, and now she’s put so much confidence in her strength that it’s become her weakness. She’s blinded by lust, and it’s clouded her judgment. I want to know my daughter is taken care of by a great man, not just someone who can provide for her and take care of her…but be good for her. To love her the way I love her, to care for her as the small woman that she is. That’s what I want…and I don’t feel that way about you.”
I could barely get the question out. “Why? You told her you want her to be with a powerful man, someone who can take care of her. I fit that bill perfectly. Nothing can get past me.”
“But you’re also a target. One of these days, something is going to go wrong. Someone is going to want revenge. An attack will arrive, and you’ll never see it coming. You won’t be able to protect her.”
“I’d die before I let anything happen to her.”
“And in this case, you may both die. The only way to ensure that doesn’t happen is to get off the radar. Live a quiet life with honest work. Keep your head down. Practice a life of peace and quiet. That is the only way to make sure she’s safe.”
It seemed like he was asking me to quit my job, the only job I’d ever known. It paid my bills and gave me purpose. It gave me an outlet to release my rage. Without it, I wouldn’t know my identity anymore.
“When my wife told me she was pregnant, that’s when I left that life. I told my brother I was leaving the arms business and focusing on my wine. Stepping away from crime and corruption was the only way to give my family the life they deserved. Karma came back for us, almost ripped us apart, and then Cane left his business and joined mine. Ever since then, it’s been nothing but quiet. It was hard in the beginning, but I don’t have any regrets. When I found out my son had been going to the Underground, I made him promise to stop and stay away. I don’t want to get mixed up in that lifestyle ever again. You’re the gateway to that. If you really want to be accepted into this family, you’re going to have to choose. If you really want to prove yourself to me, you’ll have to make that sacrifice. No way around it.”