Of Cinder and Bone

by Kyoko M

  “Yes, sir.” One of the men raised his gun towards Fujioka.

  “Ah, ah,” Okegawa said. “The lady and I have unfinished business.”

  Then he drew his own gun and shot Watsuki in the head.

  The big man slumped backwards. His blood mixed with the pale dirt beneath him, turning it brownish-black. Yagami screamed in wordless anger and launched himself at Okegawa. The yakuza beside him held him back by his arms.

  “I called you my brother!” Yagami snarled into Okegawa’s face. “I protected you! I helped you! Where is your honor? Where is the man who saved my life?”

  Okegawa studied him for a long moment. “He doesn’t exist. He never did.”

  He snapped his fingers and turned around, heading back into the woods. “Bring them.”

  ~*~

  They made a tourniquet for Fujioka’s arm as they rode down the mountain in the back of one of the black vans. She’d been forced to wear a hood and a gag, but she could still hear them passing dozens of sirens along the way. Police. Late as always, she mused to herself.

  The blood loss made it hard to concentrate, but she calculated they drove for half an hour to another location before being hauled out. They hadn’t returned to Tokyo. The air smelled fouler here. A farm of some sort. Somewhere isolated and out of the way, somewhere that couldn’t be approached easily with plenty of lookouts.

  She was indoors when they sat her down in a plain wooden chair. Two men held her down while another fished the slug out of her shoulder, sanitized the wound, and then wrapped it enough to keep her from bleeding out. She didn’t struggle. No point. She knew when the enemy had the upper hand, after all. No sense in expending precious energy.

  The men released her. Footsteps echoed away, until only one pair remained. The hood lifted. She blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted to the light.

  She sat in the middle of a barn. No animals present, but she smelled old droppings and feed, so they hadn’t been gone long. It had a low ceiling, square pens with thin metal fences separating them every several feet, and had troughs lining two of the four walls. The size of the pens and the leftover stench clued her in that it was a pig farm. The barn doors were closed. She could see through the cracks in the wood that a couple armed men stood outside to guard it.

  “Does your shoulder hurt?” Okegawa asked, untying her gag.

  Fujioka licked her dry lips and swallowed a few times to wet her throat enough to speak. “Does your nose?”

  He narrowed his eyes at her. She smiled. He mirrored her smile a moment later. “Fair enough. Please let me know if it starts bleeding again. I have a medic on staff who can take care of it.”

  “Why, thank you. I’ll be sure to keep you informed.”

  He withdrew a lighter next and tapped a cigarette out of its carton. After he lit it, Okegawa pulled up a second chair and sat down in front of her, close enough that their knees nearly touched. It wasn’t a large risk. Her ankles were taped to the legs of the chair and her arms were still zip-tied.

  “It actually took me quite a while to dig up your background, Fujioka-san. I’m impressed. Your reputation is outstanding. Decorated soldier. Dedicated bodyguard. Exceptional martial artist. You’ve excelled in pretty much everything you put your mind to.” He smirked faintly. “Well, except protecting Jackson and ojō-sama.”

  Fujioka glanced around the barn. “Oh, so you found them, then?”

  His smirk wilted. “Ah. I see. You have me, not them. Insult my skills if you want, but report the facts correctly, if you don’t mind.”

  “You have a very insolent tongue,” he said sourly. “Did that contribute to your leave of absence in the Special Forces?”

  “Possibly. Boys never like being told the truth about themselves, after all.”

  “True enough.” He leaned in enough to rest his forearms on his knees. “But I’m not a boy, Fujioka-san. Would you like to know why you’re still alive?”

  “Your men have bad aim?”

  “Jackson will come for you,” he said in a hushed tone. “Despite all odds, despite knowing it will get him killed, despite getting the dragon back, he will come for you.”

  “Bully for me. What’s your point?”

  “I want to know why.”

  “Why what?”

  “Why he cares. You’re more than just a bodyguard. A man doesn’t risk his life for a woman unless they have a history. I want to know what’s so special about you.”

  Fujioka laughed. “Are you kidding me? You’re wasting my time because you want to know our history? What is this? Amateur hour? Where are the actual adults in this organization?”

  Okegawa took a long drag on the cig. “To stop your enemy, you need to get into their head. Play their weaknesses against them. I don’t want to just kill him. I want to destroy him. I want to lay waste to his entire line and salt the earth where he dies. Do you want to come between me and my revenge, knowing what it means for you?”

  He stood and placed his large hands on the arms of her chair, leaning in until she could smell the smoke on his breath. “Do you want all my attention focused on you instead? Do you want to see what I did to become the man standing before you, a man who has spent the better part of a decade slitting throats on both sides of two of the most feared yakuza organizations in all of Japan?”

  They met eyes. Neither budged for well over a minute.

  “Listen, junior,” Fujioka murmured. “You’re not thinking clearly. Is it true that Jack will come for me? Yes. Is that your main concern? No. It shouldn’t be.”

  “Oh? And why is that?”

  She tilted her head so that her face aligned with his cheek, her lips right next to his ear. “Because I’m not locked in here with you. You’re locked in here with me. So, you’d better pray that Jack gets to you before I do, because when I’m done with you, they’ll have to bring in the world’s best historian to convince the world that you ever fucking existed.”

  Okegawa drew back enough to smile at her. “I think I like you, Fujioka-san. Strong women turn me on. Maybe after we’re done here, I’ll make room for you in my bed.”

  She chuckled softly. “And maybe before I kill you, I’ll skull-fuck you with that cigarette.”

  He laughed and stood, blowing out one last lungful of smoke. He stomped it out and called to the men outside the door, telling them to start filling the trough with water. “Don’t worry, Fujioka-san. I’ll make you wet for me one way or another.”

  ~*~

  “Where did you inject her last time?”

  “Here,” Jack said, lightly trailing his fingertips over Pete’s chest. “The scales are thinner here and she didn’t feel it until the needle accidentally went in at an angle.”

  “I see. What about her tail? There should be a large vein there, where I drew her blood during the first exam. She shouldn’t have as many nerve endings there.”

  Jack paused. “…I really wish I’d thought of that before.”

  She hid a smile and flipped the vial upside down, sticking the needle into the casing and withdrawing a few ounces of liquid. “No one’s perfect.”

  Kamala traced the lighter scales on the underside of the dragon’s spiny tail until she felt the reptile’s pulse beating strong and slow against her fingers.

  She took a deep breath. “Here goes nothing.”

  She stuck the needle in. Pete didn’t move. She pushed the plunger down and withdrew, snapping the cap back on. “There. The hard part’s over, at least.”

  “Yeah. I only wish we had a lollipop to give her.” He smiled faintly and she returned it. Slowly, she began to notice that their eye contact felt heavier than usual, more meaningful. She shied her gaze away towards the cave’s exit.

  “The storm’s slowing down. Do you think it’s safe yet?”

  “Maybe,” Jack answered, pushing to his feet. “Either way, one of us has to find out if Fujioka and the others got
away. We’re supposed to meet her at the safe zone. Besides, now that we have Pete, we’ve got to contact the authorities to get her somewhere safe, and then go after Fujioka if she didn’t make it out.” He grimaced. “I guess technically we should tell them Yagami was with them too, but I’m not exactly concerned for his well-being right now.”

  “Neither am I, but it’s probably the right thing to do.”

  Jack sighed. “Goddamn moral compass. Go bother someone else for a change.”

  He examined the snowfall and wind outside before coming back in. “I think I can manage it. Stay with Pete. Wait about an hour and then find a way to get the three of us home. I’ll contact you when I find something.”

  “You don’t want to take my phone with you?”

  He shook his head. “You need it more than I do.”

  She fished inside her jacket pocket and held a different phone out. “Here. At least take Nakamura’s, so you’ll have something to use when you get in range of a cell tower.”

  He took it. “Thanks. Be safe, alright?”

  Jack headed for the outside world. Kamala tried to hold her tongue, but the words slipped out before she could stop herself. They’d been dancing around it, avoiding it, for over an hour. She couldn’t stand it any longer.

  “Did you mean it?”

  “Yeah, don’t worry. I’ll be alright, I promise—”

  “No,” Kamala whispered. “What you said back there. Are you in love with me?”

  Jack stopped dead.

  The wind howled and whistled outside the cave. He hadn’t been cold out there, but now it felt like his bones had been flash-frozen. His heart repeatedly rammed into his ribs as if it wanted to escape so it wouldn’t have to deal with the conversation.

  Jack licked his lips and turned slowly. “Kam… this really isn’t the time for that.”

  “Timing?” she said, narrowing her eyes and crossing her arms. “You want to talk about timing, after you blurted it out when you thought we were going to die?”

  Jack winced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what I was saying and—”

  “Don’t lie to me, Jack,” she spat, her voice echoing heat through the cave. “Shortly after we met, Fujioka said there was something I didn’t know. She wouldn’t explain, but it was pertaining to you.”

  “Fujioka’s a meddler. She meddles. Always has.”

  “You said it to me before.”

  Jack’s eyes widened. “When?”

  “After Tomoda shot you, just before you passed out.”

  He swallowed hard. “Oh. Well, drugs are bad, mmkay.”

  “Rhett Bartholomew Jackson,” Kamala said quietly. “If you don’t tell me the truth right now, I will throw you off this mountain.”

  Jack’s large, suddenly clammy hands opened and closed uselessly for a few seconds before he sighed and turned away, his voice hoarse. “Yeah. I meant it, Kam.”

  Kamala took a deep breath, unnerved that it came out shaky. She’d put her hands inside men’s chests while they were seconds away from death and was steady as a rock. Now, there were tremors shivering up and down her ringed fingers, turning the tips ice-cold. Her breath curled in swirling patterns, faster and faster with every growing second of silence.

  “Why didn’t you tell me before now?”

  Jack snorted. “Been asking myself that for months, actually. At first, I thought it was just cowardice. I mean, we’re partners. I’ve wondered whether the key to why our project worked—why we worked—was because things were still platonic. I was scared that shifting the relationship would deep-six the partnership… because if you rejected me, I wasn’t sure I’d fully recover. I’d always respect you, always care for you, but that hurt could corrupt the way we saw each other. I figured it wasn’t worth the risk, that maybe it was simple infatuation that would fade over time. I’m sure you’ve had that happen before, that kind of undefined chemistry with someone you weren’t sure about, so you left it alone.”

  He smiled faintly, bitterly. “Only problem is, it didn’t go away. It grew. Every day we spent together, I found a new reason to love you. It would be different if it was just attraction, like with Faye and Misaki. I can look at it logically and identify why it wouldn’t work. But I couldn’t do that with you. Crushes crumble if nothing’s done about them resolved over time. This feeling though… lingered. The more I tried to ignore it, the more it became clear that I was falling for you. Then, I was faced with the horrible choice of telling you. Rejection is a part of life. I’m used to it by now, but… honestly, you’re the only stable thing I’ve ever had in my life. I’m sure you’ve noticed my antisocial behavior. It’s not easy for me to make friends or go on dates, and so I focused all my energy into the project since I didn’t have anything else. Then, you walked into that door and everything changed. It hit me like lightning. You’re everything I’m not, Kam. You’re steadfast and extroverted and lively and passionate. My whole world was nothing but greyscale before you came along and splashed color all over it. I experienced things I never even knew was possible after I met you. Most importantly, you calm me. The thing inside me that makes me angry all the time isn’t nearly as bad when I’m around you. Call it whatever you want, but I realized I need you far more than you need me, and that’s why I kept it to myself. If you knew I felt this way and you didn’t feel the same, I worried you’d feel obligated to stay with me because you didn’t want to see me hurt.”

  He inhaled and finally ventured to look at her, his gaze soft. “I know you care about me, Kam. I’ve never doubted it. The reason I didn’t tell you is because I’m not worthy.”

  Kamala blinked. “Worthy?”

  He nodded. “I took a good, hard look at myself and my actions over the past few days. Yagami is scum, but he had a point. He told me I was dragging you down with me. This whole time, I’ve been selfishly assuming that everything I did was to protect you, when I’ve really been protecting myself. I think I was right before, about being your dragon, not your knight. I can’t protect you. I can’t pretend that I know what you want anymore. I have to become the kind of man who can be there for you when you need me, not for my own benefit. I must become someone who enriches your life the way you’ve enriched mine. If I can do that, then maybe someday you’ll be able to see me the way that I see you.”

  “And who says I don’t already, Jack?” she asked. “I’ve seen how far you would go to get our dragon back. What you’ve given up already to protect our ideals and what both of us believe in. I wouldn’t have gone with you to Tokyo if I didn’t know your value in my life, who you are to me. I trust you. I don’t trust many people. There has never been a reason to doubt the man you are, not once, until you told me you loved me. I have never wanted to be the reason for your suffering. You carried all of that inside you for so long, enduring because you were afraid of what I might say in return, that it could fracture our friendship. You’re right. This changes things.”

  She walked towards him and touched the side of his face, her fingers steady now. “You are a kind, loyal, brave man, Jack. You have nothing to be afraid of. I have never pictured my future without you in it, not since all those months ago after we started working together. You have earned my love and my trust a thousand times over, and you will never lose them.”

  She smiled a bit sadly. “Finding out that you’re in love with me is… a lot to take in. It’s not that I’ve never found you attractive, either. I’ve noticed how you look at Faye and Fujioka and it never occurred to me that I would appeal to you. You seem to prefer aggressive women, and so I figured that put me out of the running, so to speak. All I can say is that I need time to process this. You hold me in such high regard that I’m afraid I would only let you down.”

  “Not possible,” he said with a small lopsided smile. “But I get the picture.”

  She shrugged. “I’m only human.”

  “If you say so, angel.” He cupped her hand against his c
heek and tilted his face, kissing her palm before he lowered it to her side.

  “Stay safe.”

  He flipped the collar of his shirt up and braced against the frigid wind, vanishing into the white haze.

  ~*~

  All her life, Fujioka had been close to water. She lived on the coast as a small girl, and found joy in the tiny bonsai tree surrounded by a gorgeous gurgling fountain in her mother’s office, the koi ponds she used to visit as a teenager when they returned to Japan, even the sōzu in her grandmother’s garden. The element brought her peace during meditation, and after her tempestuous week with Jack, she even made sure to find time once a week for a long, hot bubble bath. It could wipe anything away, change almost anything, and yet still remain unmoved by the world around it.