Ethan and Kali flew from the sky and landed onto the ground, their feet in perfect rhythm to take their landing. They now walked along a glittering path full of trees and plants in the ether. Ethan looked at Kali and kissed her. He had to take her through this, into the different portals and she glowed with all her beauty. They walked together in this sparkling, divine world. As they walked through, an image like a circle of an image appeared to the left of Ethan. He stopped and looked, he knew immediately what was in it, if he chose to look or go inside. Kali looked at Ethan, she knew as well.
“Do you want to go in?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“Don’t worry you won’t remember this part when you awake.”
They entered the circle, the image and they went inside. Once they were through, they came to the open sky and they zoomed through it in the open air. The sky was blue and it felt so free to roam and see everything from high above. They were flying through the San Francisco bay area. It was no different from doing this in real life. It was just in a different time zone and done without the human body. They could see the city, the bridge and they glided around. They were flying around freely and looking at their surroundings, then they got the feeling to go closer to the land and they went towards some markings they knew. As they came closer they could see the car traffic. They watched the cars and the flow of the traffic in San Francisco. Ethan thought about being in one of the cars and suddenly he was there inside it. His manifestations were so quick now and he was there sooner than a split second. He followed the car, sitting inside it. Eventually the car left the condense traffic area and went into the winding roads of San Francisco, an area with a cliff, it went high and followed the coastline. It was a beautiful drive with amazing scenery. Ethan was happy he chose this car. Ethan left the car and jumped back into the air again. He could sense Kali, she was watching from somewhere but she was hidden, so mysterious, her powers were becoming enhanced. He could feel her, but he couldn’t spot her, she was watching him, he knew that, he could feel her stare, and he chuckled to himself, adoring her strength and power. From above he looked at the car he was in. Some rain has fallen and the road was now wet. As the car came around the corner there was a truck and another car overtaking it, coming right towards the car that Ethan was in just a moment ago. Ethan could see there will be a front on collision unless something changes, he decided to enter back into the car. The car swerved the oncoming car. It missed the car by inches but by doing so exited onto an off ramp that had road works and cones. The car headed down the off ramp, into the light barrier, through it, then over the edge into the open air. Ethan watched and saw the sea below and saw how serene and picturesque that image looked despite what was happening. He decided to hop back out of the car and went back into the sky.
He flew around looking for Kali and there she was. She came out of nowhere with a glint in her eye.
“I know you’ve been watching me,” Ethan said.
“I know, I can’t help it.”
Ethan and Kali come out of the San Francisco sky, the portal in a flash and were back in the original forest.
“I like watching you, when you can’t see me,” she said.
Ethan looked at Kali his goddess. They laughed together, their love so intoxicating, they kissed still laughing.
~~~~
The morning arrived and Ethan could remember clearly going to the ether. For the first seven minutes when he awoke, this human world felt like an illusion as he was so connected still to the ether. It was like he was still there or had just left and had to enter this plane with all the memory of the ether and this human world was the distant one. The opposite to how everyone usually feels; this human world and the other supposed heavenly, spiritual realm that could exist. The human world now felt like the secondary place or the illusion for Ethan as the memory of the ether was still so potently with him. Ethan lay there thinking how it had been two minutes since he had last seen Kali, then three, four. It was all so real. Then slowly he returned to this world with a slight thump. It was bland here compared to the ether. Ethan could remember the whole night crystal clear though the memory of going through the coastline of San Francisco at the end was very vague to him now.
Elisabeth came into his room and handed him the phone. He was half asleep in bed. He knew it was Kali.
“Hi.”
“Darling angel, remember taking me through the forest last night?”
“Yeah, you remembered.”
“Yes, next time I’m taking you through a portal.”
~~~~
Kali jumped out of the shower, her body hugged the towel and her hair was wet. It was Thursday and she had packed and had done everything she needed. She had everything boxed up and ready to be picked up and stored. Jason had stayed home today and had decided to take two days off work. He was expecting her to leave on the weekend, but she was leaving today and would stay in a hotel for a few nights before heading back to San Francisco. She had told Jason the night before of her plans. She couldn’t keep staying here.
Jason had gone out for a couple of hours and it gave her a chance to have a breather and double check that she had everything. She felt slightly rushed but she had to do it and make her move. If she did leave something behind she could always arrange for it to be delivered to her later, but she was pretty certain she had everything. She had her main things like passport, wallet. She had too much stuff anyway, all she needed was a suitcase and Ethan. That was all she needed now, nothing else. That excited her, she felt free. She didn’t give a fuck now about anything else. She didn’t care if she left some of her belongings behind, it didn’t matter. She had herself, Ethan and now freedom.
Jason arrived home and Kali was all ready to leave. She said hi and tried not to look too happy, but she felt freedom. There was a mix of emotions but mainly it felt like escaping and feeling excited.
“Jason.... this is it. Just because I’m doing this, doesn’t mean it’s easy, or that I don’t care…it just wasn’t meant to be forever...I guess.”
“If you leave, Kali I can’t be in touch, I have to get on with my life.”
“I know. I understand that.”
“I don’t know what to say, is there someone else?”
“No. Even though it’s the end I’ve spent six years with you, knowing you....” she was going to say, ‘and loving you,’ but she couldn’t say it, there was a gap in her speech and she just finished with, “it’s a sad moment.”
“We don’t have to say goodbye, there’s a part of you that doesn’t want to leave…”
“Jason, no. It’s sad but I feel relieved. I wish we could talk like friends and connect and be honest for a change, but you can’t do that.”
She stopped and looked at Jason, these would be her last words to him so she wanted to be really present in the moment and say what she needed, she continued.
“In the two months I have been away I’ve changed. I also realize I’ve processed a lot in that time away. There’s no baggage, I’m just over it. I’m sorry to say that but I am.”
It seemed tough for her to say it be she was being honest. She had processed it, she thought she would be sad but the closer the door got, the better she felt.
“Sure, easy for you to say that, I’ve spent every part of me to be with you, helped you financially, supported you. I’ve been so good to you and you just shut it down with no discussion.”
“We did discuss this. We had a break and now a choice is made. This is how I feel. I understand it’s not what you want...but it’s me being true to my feelings.”
“I can hardly look at you.”
He looked at her in the opposite way Ethan looked, he looked harsh and judgmental. He was judging her and looking at her with contempt.
“Don’t look at me with disgust, Jason. I know it’s sad. But the level of connection and love that I need you just cannot give. I don’t expect it from you anymore. I really don’t. But I can make a choice for myself even though it
is not what you want.”
Jason just looked, uncertain what to say and right then Kali realized with what she had hoped for, from him, all along was an illusion of type. She had hoped for more and expected it, but the truth was he simply couldn’t give it. He couldn’t give something that he didn’t have or understand. The expectation for him to give something that he didn’t possess was a void equation and she knew it right then. She wanted to be heard, loved, understood, listened to deeply, and expected it, despite Jason not having the ability or understanding to give it to himself or to another. This was part of the consequence of having expectations, especially when those expectations were unable to ever be met.
The taxi was waiting outside and she grabbed her bags and left.
She went back for her last bag and that would be it.
Kali faced him. She looked at him for the last time. When she looked she felt compassion, she also realized how strong she had become. In front of her seemed like a lost, young boy. She felt so separated from him but deeply understanding at the same time. She saw the girl she was then, when she first met him and the woman she was now.
Jason could see this new woman also. The new strength that had emerged and it just made him want her more. She took a step towards him and hugged him and then she left.
She walked out and into the taxi, forever saying goodbye to that old life. Jason watched her walk away, the feeling in his stomach felt nauseous. He was certain he was going to throw up. He felt so pained and as he saw her walk away, all he could feel was devastation. Tears rolled down his face. He could never cry in front of anyone but the moment she walked away he felt a pain he had never experienced. He saw the detail of her beauty like never before. When he looked at her while she was walking away, her walk, her legs, her hair looked surreal and right then he didn’t know whether he could handle not seeing her ever again. She jumped into the taxi, she didn’t look back and the car went immediately. Tears rolled down his face. If he had ever understood Kali’s beauty it was right now. For the first time ever he understood her for the smallest moment. When he surrendered to the pain, he saw how gorgeous and pure she was. He saw her smile and those eyes deeper than ever before. Especially now when he realized he may not see them ever again.
Despite everything that had happened he was still in love, and didn’t feel he would ever get over her.
~ CHAPTER FIFTEEN ~
DEATH
In San Francisco Ethan was plodding around the house, Elisabeth was at work. He had dropped in to see her after his morning lecture and had helped her with a few jobs and now he was alone at home. It felt good to be by himself, he needed to relax. He felt so much was going on and he needed to stay grounded. He made himself a coffee. That often seemed to ground him and it was true it did have a grounding effect, and lots of water cleared the mind. His home felt so loving, warm and spacious that he could just hang out there by himself and feel wonderful doing very little. It was like a holiday retreat especially compared to his old place in Noe Valley which was more humming, urban cool. This was calm and his mother had decked it out so well. Ethan sat there having his coffee, he thought he would probably just stay home all day and wait for his mom to turn up and make dinner, or he would call up a restaurant and get some nice food delivered.
~~~~
Across town Lenard arrived at his home, he walked in and was greeted by his mom. His brother, Brandon was also there, in another room. He was the passenger on the plane who had sat next to Kali. His mother was waiting for Lenard and gave him a big a hug as she usually did. She asked how his day was, while she boiled the jug and offered him some snacks. Lenard mentioned his latest exam and that he had done very well. It was a happy household.
His brother Brandon walked in from his bedroom.
“Hi, Lenard.” Brandon said.
“You’re back. How was your trip?” Lenard asked.
“It was great thanks.”
“Come on, Brandon don’t be coy. He did meet a lovely girl on the plane,” his mom said.
Brandon had been talking to his mom about the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. It was kali on the plane.
“Mom, it was only brief, but what a connection. The most beautiful woman I have ever met.”
“Think you’ll see her again?” Lenard asked.
“Probably not, but you never know. It made my trip, just knowing there is such beauty out there. Admittedly I froze, I didn’t know what to say, I was out of my league!”
Brandon’s mom gave him a little, “aww” and touched him in that motherly way.
~~~~
Kali was in her new hotel, she went up market. She enjoyed the luxury and the freedom of not having Jason around. She just wanted to be by herself and rest and talk to Ethan before she went to bed. She went down to the hotel restaurant and had a meal by herself and then she headed back to her room. She showered and as she put the bodywash over her body she told her body how much she loved it. She felt connected and she wanted to talk to her body as this was the part of her that was getting her around. She knew how people just took their bodies for granted, sending junk food into it, but worst was the negative thoughts and the stress they gave their bodies. So tonight she really wanted to appreciate her body on a deep level. As she showered herself and thought of Ethan, she could almost feel his presence. When she looked at her body it was like for a moment she was looking at her naked body through Ethan’s eyes and she saw how gorgeous she looked, how clear her skin was, how radiant it glowed and the smoothness of her body. She loved her body and she got the intense feeling of how Ethan felt when he saw her sexually, the intensity and the love and the attraction he felt looking at her.
She placed her hotel gown on and wished that Ethan was there to take it off. He would be soon and they would have to come to a flash place like this. She jumped into bed and called Ethan. It was so exciting for them to talk. They felt like they were next to each other as they curled up in their beds and heard each other talk and breath. She told Ethan she was in a hotel and would be back in San Francisco in a few days. They were both really sleepy and were nearly falling asleep with the phone on their ear. Ethan blew out his candle and got back into bed. She turned her light off and they said goodnight. Ethan kept the phone near his ear as he went to sleep, he could hear her breath, she sounded so cute and they fell asleep both phones still on, hearing each other’s breath.
~~~~
They were both in the ether now. Ethan was standing there all alone when Kali zoomed in from nowhere from an impossible angle, they stared at one another with love. Kali grabbed Ethan’s hand and said, “I’m taking you somewhere.”
Ethan was a bit surprised. Kali was leading the way and taking him towards a portal. They started to glide through the air, holding one another and they came to a portal. It was unknown to Ethan, this time Kali knew what was happening. A reversal of last time when Ethan took her through the portals. It was his turn to have to trust.
“It’s okay,” Kali said.
She led the way and they went through the wall of light. Ethan could feel the uncertainty and the need to be clear and trust Kali with the four seconds of such immense power and intensity. He could sense Kali’s love just saying, ‘trust, trust me.’
They came through the portal and beautiful images appeared on the other side. They went through another portal and when they come out everything looked a lot different. They saw images of the future around year 2035, they were both in love, Elisabeth, Halo, Amy, Christian and Carl were also there.
Then it went blank, a bit dark and Ethan was reaching his hand out trying to find her, trying to reach her, where is she? Calling her name, “Kali Kali!”
He awoke suddenly, all sweaty saying her name out aloud.
~~~~
Kali got out of bed in her new hotel. The moment she awoke she had teary eyes, something was big. It must be love she thought. She remembered the ether with Ethan last night and that immediately made her teary eyed again. It was every
thing, the beauty was escalating to a level she didn’t know existed. This was bliss, exciting but so deep and challenging also. There was a deep burning in her core now that was missing Ethan. It was getting really hard not to be around him. It was becoming almost painful.
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