Once Upon a Heartbreak

by Cassie Rocca

  The tension between them had disappeared, though, so he decided to pick her up again, making her scream in surprise. With her in his arms, he started walking in the cold water. “Candy, don’t listen to her,” he shouted to his daughter, who had remained on the shore. “The truth is that when someone knows what he wants, he just takes it. You should never trust a man who only ever tells you nice things but never shows you how much he really cares for you,” he said while looking at Liberty as if to challenge her. “Actions are more important than words.”

  She lifted her face to look at him. “So what exactly do you want from me, Zack?” she whispered. “Why are you putting on this stupid show?”

  “For a lot of reasons,” he replied. “First of all, both Candy and I would like to spend some time with you, but we apparently can’t convince you…”

  “I said I would spend some time with you.”

  “You did, but we don’t want you looking like you’re on a chain gang! Candy’s planning to tickle you until you laugh, just so you know.”

  “Ok, I won’t stop her from trying. Are you done now?” said Liberty in a low voice, trying hard to keep her balance without touching him, while making sure that her dress didn’t get blown about by the wind.

  He didn’t have any real reason for keeping her in his arms except trying to rekindle their old friendship and… okay, yeah, being in closer physical contact.

  He hugged her tightly and she ended up crushed to his chest. Liberty was trying very hard to keep some distance between them, but without success.

  “Damn it, let me go! I’m about to fall!” she cried, looking at the water. She was probably thinking that she’d rather let herself drown than continue to let him hug her that way.

  Zack loosened his grasp a little, and she felt as though she was slipping. She froze, and he gave her a wink. “Again, I’d suggest you hold me tight, because that water really is cold and you’ve only just got over the flu. You don’t want to get ill again, do you?”

  Liberty hesitated, and Zack let her drop a little further. “You’re right, I should hold you tight,” she said, while pulling his hair as hard as she could and planting her nails in his shoulders.

  Zack laughed. He didn’t even feel any pain – he was too happy to see the rebellious, mischievous sparkle that had appeared in her eyes.

  “Well, aren’t you aggressive, Miss Liberty? You used to be such a sweet girl… But I like you now too,” he whispered, while hugging her more firmly.

  It was true – having her so close was awakening all the instincts he had denied himself in order to be a good father. The circumstances weren’t in any way favorable, but he had to admit that he really liked having her in his arms. He appreciated Liberty’s seriousness and her lack of coquetry, traits that he’d struggled to find in the women he’d met over the past few years, but he would have really liked to flirt a little more with her… to push the limit and see what would happen. She was pretty and had a lovely perfume and the way she insisted upon keeping her distance was the most intriguing thing ever…

  “Please, let me go now,” whispered Liberty, evidently embarrassed.

  Her cheeks were red, and her ample bosom was heaving, touching his chest lightly as she breathed frantically. Her eyes seemed even bigger than usual, and were looking at him the same way they had the last time he had seen her in Chicago, when he had wiped some chocolate off her nose. He remembered that on that occasion he had wondered if she would look at him in the same anxious way she looked at him when she was expecting to taste a new dessert if she was expecting him to kiss her.

  And at that moment he asked himself the very same question again. He realized that his thoughts had taken a turn in a forbidden direction, and he pulled himself together. “I’m sorry,” he said, walking back towards the beach, “every time I look at you I see my Miss Liberty. It’s hard for me to think that you’re not that girl anymore.”

  As soon as her feet were on the ground, she walked away from him. “I was never your Miss Liberty,” she pointed out, and set off walking towards the house.

  Candice stopped her. “But you promised to stay!”

  “Sure, just let me get my drawing notebook, okay?” she said, and ran away.

  Candice turned to look at her father. “I don’t know if we’ll be able to make her laugh, Dad, it’s too hard…”

  “But we’re Sullivans! We never give up, right?”

  “Right!”

  Candice couldn’t wait for Liberty to come back, and Zack realized that if he wanted to have any peace for the rest of the weekend, he had to stop thinking of her as someone who had arrived directly from the past to resume their relationship from where they had interrupted it.

  *

  Don’t go back out there! You don’t have to keep your promise – he extorted it from you anyway!

  Of course you have to keep your word! You should never disappoint a child, especially one who has already suffered rejection, just like you did.

  No, he’s too dangerous! You’ve seen the way he looks at you… And you know the way you feel when he’s close to you… You have to keep away from him!

  Liberty leaned on the hall door, her head in her hands. Her heart was beating madly and she couldn’t decide between her rational self and her emotions… She felt as though she was about to go mad. While she really wanted to go back to that beach and enjoy Zack’s and his daughter’s company, she was terrified by the desire she felt.

  She was so confused that she thought she would even have been able to eat an ice cream… or a whole pack of them.

  Now do you see? That’s the bad effect he has on you! He provokes a whole bunch of very dangerous desires in you! her reason whispered in her mind, reminding her of the sensations she had felt in his arms when he was looking at her with those sexy eyes of his. Not much had changed during all these years… When he was only seventeen he’d been able to make the whole school sigh when he walked past, and now that he was thirty-two he could win over the coldest woman ever without even trying…

  But was it just because of his charm, or was she… She didn’t dare finish her thought.

  For God’s sake, Liberty! You have a fiancé, and you’re about to get married! Get a grip! she scolded herself, while slapping her forehead. How could she have turned from a woman with the utmost integrity into a little girl with heart shaped eyes so quickly?

  And where the hell was her boyfriend when she needed him most? She was sure that she wouldn’t be so confused if Justin were only there. Or at least, that was what she hoped.

  “Ok then, I’m not going back out there. I can tell them that I have an important phone call to make for work and then I’ll just stay in my room and wait for the others to get back,” she mumbled, grabbing her phone and walking towards the window to tell them she was staying indoors. When she saw them running after each other, hugging, laughing and kissing, though, she couldn’t face telling them she wasn’t joining them.

  That scene touched her heartstrings for several reasons. First of all, she had never played with her own dad that way, and she couldn’t even remember his face very well anymore. Jim Allen had been a very absent father, and had never cared much about her needs. She had tried to understand his behaviour, and had come to the conclusion that he hadn’t been ready to have a child at twenty-six, and when he had found himself with two daughters, he had felt trapped. As an adult she had almost forgiven, if not forgotten, her father for running away with his secretary, but the child in her could never forgive nor forget all the pain and the feelings of solitude and inadequacy he had caused her. After running away, he had never gotten in touch with his family again, and then one day he had drowned during a diving expedition in the Virgin Islands. The only thing her father had left her was his surname – she had given to charity the little money she’d inherited from him.

  That was why she felt duty bound to keep the promise she made to Candice. Playing on the beach was, of course, nothing important, but that little girl h
ad already suffered a lot, probably more than her, considering that her mother hadn’t even tried to love her before she’d rejected her. Unlike her young self, Candice wasn’t trying to compensate for her mother’s absence by eating everything she could get her hands on, though – she tried to be friends with everyone she met instead, and she was very good at it: she was so adorable that even cool Liberty couldn’t resist her.

  And the truth was that she didn’t want to disappoint Zack either – a man who appeared to be wonderful with his daughter, and was always ready to do anything to satisfy that little girl’s needs and desires.

  She couldn’t run away like a coward. And anyway, what did she need to run away from? Her physical attraction to him? Come on, she was already thirty years old, she could control her impulses. Zack wasn’t the first man who had looked at her that way or tried to seduce her, and she was sure that Justin occasionally flirted with other women. There was absolutely nothing to worry about – her relationship with her fiancé was solid, and not even those eyes, as dark and as smooth as coffee, could ruin it.

  How many times have you dreamt of him looking at you that way? she asked herself while she watched Zack running towards the sea holding his daughter on his shoulders. So let him look at you, and enjoy your success! It was so hard for you to become what you are now!

  She straightened up, put her shoulders back, grabbed her notebook and went out of the house.

  *

  The next two hours flew by as fast as if they were just a couple of minutes. The fear of being too close to Zack had quickly disappeared, and, as the sun began to set, Liberty thought that she had never felt so relaxed in her life.

  Thanks to Candice, who wouldn’t stop talking, there had been no embarrassing silences, and they spent most of the time planning the castle they built, discussing the best type of pastry to try and make out of sand on the top of the turrets and then laughing at their failure to realize their ideas. They hadn’t managed to agree on anything so, in the end, Candice had put a cupcake on her turret, Zack a three layer cake on his and Liberty had opted for a cup of coffee, an idea for which she had been mocked mercilessly by both Sullivans.

  Zack had behaved impeccably the whole time. He hadn’t given her any mischievous smiles, nor had he tried to touch her. He had acted like a real friend. She was hugely relieved by this sudden change in his behaviour, though she couldn’t help wondering what had caused it. Her ego was slightly deflated until from the corner of her eye she noticed him looking at her with obvious desire, although he was trying to hide it.

  He was obviously attracted to her and their past friendship was probably one of the reasons why he couldn’t keep his eyes off her. Zack was no idiot, though, and he was very well aware of their situation: he was the father of a little girl who needed constant attention, stability and love, and she was about to get married. There was really no space for them to be anything else.

  After building the castle they had gone for a long walk along the beach, picking up shells and talking about their lives. They had talked mostly about their jobs, avoiding – especially in the case of Liberty – getting onto anything too personal. She talked about her shop, while Zack told her about his first job as a chef, about the restaurant he had managed in San Francisco and about Chocolate Sins, the patisserie he had opened a few years before in TriBeCa. He had a hoard of stories and anecdotes to tell about his life as a single working father, and she found them all pretty amusing.

  Once back on the beach in front of the house, Candice asked to have a look at Liberty’s drawings, and she loved them so much that she asked her to draw something for her.

  Liberty had agreed, and Zack had offered her his back to use as a table. Candice was observing her very closely, laughing at every funny detail Liberty added to the picture.

  “Is that my daddy?”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “And what’s he wearing on his head?”

  “It’s a chef’s hat.”

  “It looks like a funny crown from one of my fairy tale books!” sniggered Candice.

  “Well, it should suit me then,” Zack replied. “I am supposed to be the king of cakes, aren’t I?”

  Liberty stuck her pencil in his back to tell him to stop moving and then resumed drawing. “Well, you’re certainly as arrogant as a king, so I guess you’ll need the appropriate cloak too,” she smiled, adding one to the drawing.

  Candice laughed. “But that’s a flowery cloak! It’s for a girl!”

  “Do you think so?” Liberty joked. “I remember that your daddy used to like this pattern when he was younger. He used to have an apron that looked exactly like this.”

  “Very funny!” Zack glared at her.

  “Were you best friends?”

  “Yes,” Zack said.

  “No,” said Liberty at the same moment. The little girl looked at her confused, so she explained. “We weren’t best friends – we just spent a few weeks together many years ago, that’s all.”

  “Well, in any case, it was a beautiful friendship even if it was short,” said Zack, turning towards the sea.

  “And are you friends again now?”

  Neither of them gave an immediate response to that question, and after a few moments of silence, Zack turned to look at Liberty and raised an eyebrow, to indicate that he was waiting for an answer.

  Liberty bit her lips and said, “Well, we have only just met again, so maybe with a bit more time we can be friends again…” she stammered, while smiling at Candice.

  “Hey, don’t sound so enthusiastic,” Zack whispered in her ear. “I might get strange ideas!”

  Liberty ignored both his words and the scent that filled her nostrils when he moved close to her. She tore the piece of paper out of her notebook and gave it to the little girl.

  Candice looked at it with enthusiastic eyes. “It’s wonderful! But where are you?”

  “Oh, I didn’t think you wanted me to draw myself too… Should I?” The little girl nodded, so Liberty took the sheet of paper back and considered the best place to position herself. She had drawn an imaginative sea world, where the water was actually chocolate and the rocks looked like biscuits. Zack, with his chef’s hat as a crown, his flowery cloak and a rolling pin instead of a sceptre, was looking at his reign with an arrogant and amused expression while Candice was racing around recklessly in a cupcake shaped carriage.

  The tip of the pencil hesitated on the paper – she really didn’t know what role to give to herself. She didn’t have much to do with them: they were a family, and she wasn’t part of it. Zack was observing her and trying to guess what she would do, while Candice was waiting anxiously. In the end, she decided to draw herself standing in the middle of that chocolate sea and about to drown.

  Candice laughed. “Oh, no! Can’t you swim? So that’s why you were so scared before when Daddy took you in the water!”

  Liberty shrugged and didn’t look at Zack. “What can I say? I don’t have a very good relationship with chocolate!”

  “Don’t you like it?”

  “Not anymore,” she said and stood up, starting to feel uncomfortable again.

  Zack didn’t say a word, but took his daughter in his arms. “Ok sweetheart, let’s go have a nice bath before dinner!”

  They took the stairs together and then, on reaching the corridor, they proceeded in different directions. Liberty was about to go to her room when Zack called her.

  “Can we talk for a moment?”

  She looked at him circumspectly. “What about?”

  “I just want to say a couple of words, in the name of our renewed friendship,” he said, giving her a cheeky wink. “I’ll put Candice in the bath and come back.”

  Those words alarmed her. “Ok, if you really have to.”

  “Don’t worry, I’m not planning to eat you!” he said, before disappearing in his daughter’s room, not leaving her time to reply.

  Liberty went to her own room feeling confused and anxious. She looked around but cou
ldn’t find anything comforting to focus on. What the hell did he want from her now? They had spent a lot of time together that day, maybe too much, and she thought that they had sort of agreed on an unspoken truce, but none of that meant that she was particularly comfortable around him. And without his daughter about, she was afraid that the situation might easily get embarrassing.

  She was walking up and down on the soft carpet of her room to try and work off some of the tension when Zack appeared at the door. He was observing her with the same open, positive and frank smile that had struck her so fifteen years before. She felt her heart beating faster.

  Damn it! Why hadn’t she gone out with Justin and the others? She shouldn’t have spent so much time with these people in this house… In the last two hours her mind had gone completely numb and she had forgotten about all her mental schemes.

  “Am I making you nervous?” he asked in a low voice.

  “I’m always nervous,” she said, dismissively. She stood motionless in front of him, distant and with her arms crossed over her chest. “So what was is you wanted to say to me?”

  “First of all, I just wanted to apologize for all that stuff I said about your boyfriend,” began Zack, leaning on the door jamb. “As you told Candy, sometimes I can be quite arrogant and give my opinions about things that I don’t know anything about, just making snap judgements based on my sensations.”

  Liberty nodded. “It doesn’t matter. You’d only seen us together for a few minutes, you couldn’t have known how our relationship actually works.”

  “Well, that’s obviously true, but seeing you together with other very close couples like Clover and Cade, or Zoe and Eric, gave me the impression that something was missing in your relationship with Justin. But I guess I’m wrong. He must be a great guy, if he was able to win your heart.”

  “He sure is,” confirmed Liberty. She was feeling confused and couldn’t work out why he was saying those things.

  Zack was looking a lot less sure of himself now. “When I said that it was hard to forget the old you, I was being honest. In my mind you’re still the loving friend I used to have as a teenager, and that’s why I can’t help being a bit… over familiar with you sometimes.”