The Heart of Winter

by Emma Hannigan

  ‘We’ll get more joy out of watching him open his presents than anything else,’ Holly said excitedly. ‘Children are what it’s all about at this time of year. Family and being together, that’s what counts. Ely will probably prefer the box to his train set, but that’s par for the course. Things can be as stressful as you like every other day of the year. But on December twenty-fifth, none of it matters one jot as long as we have each other.’

  Lainey stuffed the stocking she’d bought at the local Christmas fete a few weeks ago. Satisfied it looked just right, she hugged her parents and left them to do their Santa duty.

  ‘These are the moments I treasure most,’ Holly said to Paddy. ‘I save these priceless times in my memory banks. When I’m having a bad day, I close my eyes and take a deep breath and cast my mind to a time just like now.’

  ‘That’s lovely, pet.’

  ‘We’re blessed, Paddy. This has been a good year in the end. I miss my mother all the time. But I feel she’s with me. I’ve mended a lot of bridges with Lainey. I know that was Mum.’

  ‘It’s great to see you two chatting more.’

  ‘I’ve never been closer to Joey. He’s a fine young man. He and Skye are going to make a wonderful little family, please God.’

  ‘He’s a good lad all right.’

  ‘Pippa’s an odd one,’ she smiled and shook her head. ‘I thought she was headed off the rails in a hang-glider earlier in the year. But she’s come full circle. I like her fellow Danny too.’

  ‘Pippa will always keep us guessing,’ Paddy said. ‘She has the mischievous gene in abundance. But I reckon she’ll be OK now.’

  As she filled each stocking, Holly said a little silent prayer of thanks.

  By the time they climbed the stairs to bed, she was exhausted.

  ‘It’s actually odd being back here, isn’t it?’ Holly said as she lay down in their old room.

  ‘Ah well, it’s different from when we were here. Those swanky curtains and the matching bedspread and lamp shade business . . . It’s nice and all that, but it’s like a hotel.’

  ‘That’s the general idea,’ Holly said with a smile.

  ‘It’s not exactly homely, though. It’s not the way we had it, at least. I almost prefer the gate lodge at this point.’

  Holly smiled in the dark as Paddy put his arms around her.

  ‘I do too, love,’ she said. ‘We have the best of both worlds though, don’t we?’

  Within minutes the house was silent. As Christmas Day rolled in, Huntersbrook protected the Craig family majestically as they slept soundly in their beds.

  Epilogue

  NEXT MORNING PIPPA AND JULES WERE THE FIRST out of bed as usual. Grabbing Paddy’s gong, they stood at the foot of the stairs and bashed it until everyone appeared.

  ‘Bloody hell, Pippa,’ Joey said. ‘Are you trying to wake the dead?’

  ‘It’s Christmas and we can’t waste another minute of it!’ she said cheerfully, oblivious to Joey’s grumping. As the family gathered around the tree, Ely was the star of the show. They’d all assumed he’d be far too small to understand much, but he was utterly ecstatic.

  ‘Choo-choo!’ he shouted pointing at the train while jumping up and down. Once all the bought gifts were opened, Pippa stood on the coffee table and cleared her throat, announcing she had a bit of news.

  ‘This is a gift that can’t be opened as such,’ she said smugly. ‘But I’ve sold my website and I’m using the money to buy equipment for a new gym to add to the facilities here at Huntersbrook.’

  ‘No way,’ Joey said. ‘That’s an amazing idea.’

  The others all oohed and ahhed as Pippa showed them brochures of what she was thinking of ordering.

  ‘Well if we’re sharing presents that can’t be opened,’ Skye said looking up at Joey, who nodded. ‘We have a bit of news about the baby.’

  ‘It’s not a baby,’ said Joey grimly.

  ‘I beg your pardon,’ said Paddy in alarm.

  ‘It’s babies,’ said Skye in delight. ‘We had a scan and it seems we’re having twins! That’s why I was so ill and it also explains why I look like I’ve swallowed a house!’

  ‘That’s incredible news,’ said Lainey, with tears in her eyes. Before anyone could even ask if they were sad tears she continued the trend. ‘Well Matt and I have yet another gift that cannot be opened!’

  ‘Oh dear Lord, I think I’m going to have a heart attack,’ said Paddy dramatically as he laughed. ‘Go on, love. What is it?’

  ‘You say it,’ she urged Matt.

  ‘Well, Lainey and I have made the decision to go for surrogacy. We don’t want Ely to be on his own. He needs someone to fight with and this is the best option for us. We hope you’ll all come around to the idea.’

  ‘I think it’s marvellous,’ Holly said, hugging Lainey.

  ‘You knew about this?’ Paddy said with a slow grin.

  ‘Yes, Lainey asked my opinion, didn’t you love?’

  ‘Sure did.’

  Just as they were hugging and working themselves into an excited frenzy, Jules stood on the coffee table.

  ‘I’m copying Pippa because I like the stage setting,’ she said dramatically. ‘We need to talk about this more,’ she held her hands out and Lainey grasped one, with Matt taking the other. ‘But I’ve offered to be the surrogate mum.’

  ‘And we think it’s the most amazingly wonderful and priceless gift imaginable,’ Lainey finished.

  ‘I’d be proper Auntie Jules then. I’m not going to be in the position to have a child of my own. So why not put my baby-making bits to good use?’

  There was a moment of silence as they all tried to digest the information.

  ‘We’ll need to iron out all the details and see if it’ll work, but why not try?’ Jules said.

  ‘You’re the kindest and best friend in the world,’ Lainey said, hugging her again.

  ‘I’ll vouch for that,’ said Joey as he opened his arms to her. Jules hugged him and Joey whispered to her, ‘Thanks for the kick in the butt. I needed it. You rock.’ He kissed her head and smiled.

  ‘I think we all need a strong cup of coffee,’ Paddy said standing up to make his way to the kitchen.

  ‘Before we all disperse, I have another gift that can’t be opened,’ Sadie said. They stopped and stared at her.

  ‘Mine is a little different from all the others . . . I’m dying.’ She took a deep breath as Holly gasped and Paddy rushed to hug her. Instantly, the room was filled with sorrow as each of them tried to take it all in.

  ‘How . . . how is that a gift, Sadie, love?’ Holly managed.

  ‘I’ll tell you now, if you can bear with me,’ she said. ‘I have about four months, so the doctors tell me. So I’m going to plan it all. I’ll know what music I want at my funeral, what food and who’s to come.’

  ‘Oh Sadie,’ Lainey said sobbing.

  ‘Don’t cry, love,’ she said taking Lainey’s hand. ‘I made a deal, too. With your man up there,’ she said pointing to the sky. ‘I said that I’d be happy to go, if he let you stay.’

  ‘No!’ Lainey said crying openly.

  ‘Oh yes, pet,’ she said firmly. ‘I’ve lived my life. I’ve done my time and I’ve no more “i’s” to dot or “t’s” to cross.’ She turned to the others and bravely told them about Elizabeth.

  ‘I’ve found her. I traced my baby to a place in the north of England and we’re meeting up next week. We’ve conversed via email for a few days and she knows my situation.’

  ‘Well I’ll be damned,’ Paddy said in awe. ‘You’re a dark horse, Sadie.’

  She winked at Paddy. ‘But my gift to you all is this: a reminder that you must never forget what really matters. Family and love are the be all and end all of life. Everything else is just padding. Added to fill in the hours. I intend using the time I have left to do all the things I love.’

  ‘Are you going travelling?’ Pippa asked through tears.

  ‘No lovie, I’m staying right here. I’
ll eat all my favourite things, walk my favourite fields, wear my favourite clothes and talk to my favourite people. I’ll get to meet Elizabeth next week. I’ll hold her in my arms and know that she is safe. Then, when my time comes, I’ll head on up to see Maggie. I know she’ll be there waiting.’

  ‘Oh Sadie,’ Joey said rushing to scoop her into his arms. ‘We’ll be here with you every step of the way. We’ll do all we can to ensure you see your days out with love and dignity.’

  ‘So there’s no time to waste,’ she said clapping her hands gently. ‘It’s Christmas. There’s a turkey to be stuffed. That fire needs stoking, Paddy, and we could all do with a glass of bubbles. It’s a celebration, you know . . . Life is a celebration!’

  They made quite a scene several moments later as they raised their champagne flutes while wearing red and green glittery disco-boppers and crazy Christmas-themed Hawaiian shorts over their clothes.

  ‘Why do we have to look quite so ridiculous?’ Pippa asked in a whisper.

  ‘Because I don’t want any of you to forget my last Christmas,’ Sadie said with a smile.

  What a year it had been. As they bustled around and prepared for their Christmas feast, each of the guests at Huntersbrook was acutely aware of what really mattered. This year would mark the end of an era. Next year at least one person would be missing, but as Sadie seemed keen to remind them, they could possibly be too busy to fret. With one set of twins already on the way, medical science could possibly have another set waiting in the wings.

  Lainey didn’t want to sound trite, so she kept it to herself. But that woman who’d read her tealeaves and predicted twins in the family may indeed have possessed the direct link with the angels that she advertised on her sandwich board at the fete. If she was there again next summer, Lainey was going to pay her another visit!

  Acknowledgements

  AS ALWAYS I AM HUMBLED BY THE CONTINUED support I receive from every avenue of my life. Without the people who matter the most to me, I wouldn’t be able to carry on.

  Thanks to my friend, cheerleader and agent Sheila the Great, AKA Sheila Crowley of Curtis Brown UK. Along with her able assistant Becky Ritchie, they keep all the balls in the air.

  Work is always a pleasure. When I am writing I am at peace. I know I’m lucky to be surrounded by the marvellous team at Hachette Ireland. My fabulous editor Ciara Doorley along with Breda, Jim, Ruth, Siobhan, Joanna and Bernard make my books appear as if by magic! Thanks also to Susie Cronin of Plunkett PR for all your hard work.

  This time I’ve been privileged to have additional help and editorial guidance from the one and only Mari Evans of Headline UK. All I can say is that Mari’s ability to edit is second only to her skill at applying a perfect flick of black liquid eyeliner. I know I am truly blessed to have both you and Ciara on my side.

  Thanks also to Rachel Pierce for her razor sharp and astute copy edits. What an amazing team you all are and I am curtsying in awe at the fabulous job you’ve done for me.

  Thank you to all the UK team at Headline who have welcomed me with open arms and embraced me in their warmth. In spite of residing in an imposingly swanky glass London building, you make me feel at home.

  My hubby Cian and children Sacha and Kim are always there to keep me on my toes! I love you with all my heart and soul. Thanks also to my favourite neighbours, Mum and Dad. You are my backbone and my strength. That song – You’re nobody ’til somebody loves you – rings true for me. With all of you in my life I know I am somebody . . .

  Thanks to my extended family and friends who bend over backwards to help support me and most of all make me laugh.

  I have recently finished treatment for my ninth cancer diagnosis. Quite literally, I owe my life to the astonishingly dedicated people who keep me alive. Professor John Armstrong, Dr David Fennelly and all the staff of St Vincent’s Private Hospital and Blackrock Clinic, there are no words to convey how grateful I am that you all chose to save lives. Not a day passes that I don’t thank my lucky stars that I know you all. I appreciate each day I spend on this earth and I know I’m here as a result of your care and dedication. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am feeling stronger with each passing day and I will do my best to refrain from darkening your doors, but I can’t promise anything!

  Thanks to Mark Bourke (info@slapbangwallop.com) for redesigning my website and being so astute at adding new bits and keeping it all up to date.

  I’m so grateful to all my fabulous readers. The emails and letters, tweets and Facebook messages make me smile on a daily basis. It’s always wonderful to hear from you all. Your messages help me through the bad times and make my days that little bit brighter.

  The Heart of Winter revisits Huntersbrook house where we first met the Craig family in Driving Home for Christmas. Don’t worry if you haven’t read Driving Home for Christmas, I promise you won’t be lost! I had so many letters from readers asking to hear more from this family, so how could I refuse? I sincerely hope you enjoy The Heart of Winter and that you find it as comforting to read as I did to write.

  Please continue to stay in touch on Twitter @MsEmmaHannigan, on Facebook (AuthorEmmaHannigan) or contact me via my website info@emmahannigan.com

  Love and light

  Emma x