Letters Around Midnight

by Carla Croft

  “Oh sorry” I said,

  “I was thinking.”

  “It looks like it.”

  “Anything you want to share?”

  “Hey! I do the interviewing here” I joked.

  “But, I was wondering, well if I’d miss a man if I...well you know if I was...”

  “Gay?”

  “Er, yes...which I’m not” I added and wished I hadn’t.

  “Hey, it’s no problem. I do miss a man; sometimes.” She looked wistful,

  “But, I’ve found I prefer a woman as a lover.”

  She said it matter-of-factly with a smile of self knowing on her lips. Coming from her, it sounded the most natural thing in the world. Which, of course, it is. There is nothing as natural, and as sexy, as a person comfortable in their own sexuality. It is, after all, who we are at our most fundamental.

  “So back to your story then,” I said, trying to get the conversation back on track.

  I sat back and let Amanda take over the story and, as always, found myself seeing it all happen in my mind’s eye.

  ***

  Penny, my secretary and I; well we’ve always got on well. She’s been my secretary for a few years. She’s good, extremely capable. I can trust her with anything. Although I hadn’t told her I was gay. No one else knows. I am a shy person and don’t want my sexuality to be an issue. Penny is different, she is unashamedly open on the subject of her sex life with her boyfriend. She’s young and attractive and is always buying herself sexy lingerie to treat him and shows me her latest outfits. I have fantasized about her sexually; you know, when I’m alone. I fantasize much more about people I know than celebrities or film stars. It’s much easier to imagine people you know. They are easier to hold in your mind’s eye. Famous people are well, too abstract, too unknown.

  On Valentine’s Day, Penny came to work wearing a red dress. She looked fabulous when she came into my office,

  “Mike’s taking me out tonight for a romantic meal” she said.

  She was so excited. It was infectious. I always feel good when she is happy. I should have realized what it meant ages ago. I was so concerned about keeping my sexuality under wraps, I missed all the tell tale signs that I fancied her.

  “I hope you don’t mind” she said

  “But I’ve come in ready dressed, I haven’t got time to go to change” she was biting her lip as she does when she asks me for a favour. I find it endearing.

  “Sure no problem,” I replied.

  Penny turned and pushed the door closed, although it was still early and no one else was in yet. She turned to me,

  “I reckon he is going to propose, so I got him something special, wanna see?”

  Before I had a chance to say yes or no, Penny had undone the front of her dress and was standing there staring at me in matching red bra and knickers and hold ups. She looked stunning. I must have blushed red. She stammered an apology.

  “I’m sorry I got caught up in the moment.”

  “No need to apologize” I said,

  “He’s a lucky man.”

  “Yeah.” She paused; there was something else.

  “He doesn’t give me great sex,” she whispered the words even though we were alone.

  I was surprised at her being so open. She asked me if I could be discreet and I said of course.

  “You know, the best sex I ever had was with another woman.”

  I must have blushed more. I could feel the heat from my face burning as red as her underwear. Penny continued

  “Only a woman knows what another woman wants.”

  Of course I couldn’t disagree. My tummy was churning and I was aware of getting as hot as hell. She was still standing there holding her dress open. I couldn’t take my eyes off her body. I was road-kill. She walked over, put her hands on my desk and leant toward me.

  “You know I know, right?” she said.

  “Know you know what?”

  “That you’re into women.”

  The blunt instrument of her statement hit me a body blow. I couldn’t deny it. All I managed was a stammer.

  “How?”

  “Gaydar, silly” she stood up mimicking speech marks in the air, her dress still open.

  I was still stunned. I couldn’t believe my secret was out. Penny walked around my desk and put her hands on my knees with her dress still open. Her breasts were so pert I wanted to lean forward and brush my lips across them. I could smell her peppermint breath and her perfume. I was still burning from embarrassment but my pussy was starting to tighten. The closeness of her, with her hands on my knees was turning me on.

  “You know,” she said coyly,

  “If you want me, you can have me.”

  I was petrified. If someone came into the office and saw us, we were sacked for sure. My mouth worked but the words stuck in my throat.

  “Don’t worry” she said.

  “Your secret’s safe. I’m not going to tell anyone.”

  Penny lent further forward and kissed me on the mouth. It was so sweet I couldn’t help but kiss her back. I raised a hand to cup one of her breasts. Feeling the soft weight of it in my hand was heaven. I could feel her nipple stiffening under my touch. She took my hand and ran it up her thigh to her crotch. The heat of her was incredible and I could feel the gentle give in her mound as I pressed into the cushion of hair between her legs. The feel of the skin of her thighs between her hold ups and her knickers was soft and silky. We were still kissing a slow, gentle intimate kiss. I was going crazy with desire for her. I felt her hand slip up between my thighs and let them fall apart, feeling her fingers tickling up towards my sex. It was thrilling. I shivered and my tummy tightened.

  I came to my senses and pulled away. She did her dress up and smiled at me. People began arriving for work and I tried hard to concentrate but I couldn’t. My mind was in turmoil.

  Throughout the morning, Penny would come into to my office to drop off the odd fax and letter. She would lean over my desk and give me a wicked smile. She was driving me mad with desire. Shortly before lunch she came in with some signing and walked around my side of the desk. She put her leg up against mine and began a slow gentle pressure. I responded by rubbing my leg up and down against her thigh. Everyone else was at the other end of the office and I let my hand fall to the side of my chair as I pretended to read the letter. I brushed her ankle with my finger tips and felt her shiver. I let my fingers move up on the inside of her calves moving them up and down but going higher each time. She shifted her weight and moved her legs further apart for me. I could hear her breathing becoming deeper as I eased my hand higher, stroking up and down between her knees and then brushed around the lower parts of the backs of her thighs. I was keeping an eye out through the door all the time and when I saw no one was looking I moved my hand up further, feeling where the sheerness of her stockings ended and the silkiness of her flesh began. Penny leaned forward on the desk arching her back. She had her eyes closed and she was licking her lips. If anyone came in we would be done for, but the excitement was too much and I was sucked into it. I raised my hand even higher and brushed her pussy lips through the fabric of her panties, they felt so inviting. I wanted to have my face in her pussy right there, right then.

  I saw a colleague making his way towards my office so I removed my hand and carried on reading the letter. Penny stood up and smoothed her dress down as if nothing had happened. He popped his head round my door and left. To be honest, I can’t remember what the hell he was talking about. I breathed a sigh of relief. I signed the letter and Penny disappeared off smiling at me. Waggled her fingers at me in a goodbye wave and closed my door.

  Five or ten minutes later I had to go to the top floor to see one of the guys in IT. I have a habit of always carrying my phone with me. I don’t like the thought that someone may pick it up. It buzzed into life signalling an in
coming text message. I took a glance and saw it was an MMS. I opened the message and there was a photo of a crotch I recognized as Penny’s in her red panties with the caption “come and get it”. She had to be in my back office, a small space where I have a second desk for major cases where all the files are laid out. All the other staff on the floor had gone to a birthday lunch. I knew we had some time when we ought not to be disturbed; so I went back to my office as quickly as I could. As I got to the rear door, it opened and Penny was there in her panties and nothing else. She had beautiful pert little breasts with faun coloured nipples. I ached to touch them. She was standing coyly holding the door open for me to go in. She beckoned me in with a finger.

  “Coming?” she said.

  “I went in and locked the door behind me. Penny wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me. Her skin was warm and tight. I ran my hands over her body and inside her knickers cupping the cheeks of her bum. She was so soft and welcoming. My legs were quivering. I nuzzled her neck feeling the strands of her hair as they fell across my face and traced the folds of her ear with the tip of my tongue. The bitterness of her perfume was so different from its scent; it was intoxicating. I took in deep lungfuls of it pushing my breasts up against hers. She pulled away teasing me,

  “Why don’t we open you up?”

  Penny whispered the words in my ear and spun my skirt around. She undid the zip and let it fall to the floor. I felt vulnerable for the first time. I was a professional woman but a complete novice at this. Each day this girl does what I tell her to do and there she was taking me in hand, literally. From nowhere, she produced a tiny bullet vibrator. She twisted the end. It hummed into life and she cradled it in her hand; then she cupped my pussy with it. The shock of the vibration shot me through the roof. I leant my head back as she moved the bullet back and forth between the lips of my pussy through my knickers and explored my neck with her mouth. Having had my hands up Penny’s skirt only moments before and the thought of her in her lingerie all morning had made me horny as hell. I was so close I was having difficulty holding back. Not that I didn’t want to come, but I wanted to hold off as long as I could. To savour every sweet moment of it.

  “God, Penny I’m going to come,” I whispered.

  “Not yet, you’re not.” She took the bullet away. I gasped in disappointment, my knees trembling. She was playing with me and all I could do was let her hold sway over me. I was trapped, but right then: free was the last thing I wanted.

  I sat on an old chair as Penny knelt in front of me and pulled my panties down. She kissed my pussy staring up into my face. I looked down past my breasts into her eyes as she worked her fingers into me. I closed my eyes as she moved her fingers back and forth deeper and deeper searching inside me; and at the point when as I was going to come she licked my clit and slipped the bullet inside me. She managed to hit my G spot and my clit at the same time. My legs stiffened and my pelvis bucked against her mouth as I felt wave after wave of release flow over me. My chest was heaving as I panted, leaning back into the chair. I grabbed her hair and pushed my pussy into her face, the sensation was incredible. She moved the bullet around inside me so slowly it was bordering on agony and I could feel her lips on me. I felt each lick of her tongue and pulse of the bullet. I came again with my fingers entwined in the long strands of her hair, smelling the scent of my sex as it rose up.

  It had been a real role reversal. Penny had proved to be by far the more experienced lover. I felt so naive in comparison. She was my sexual teacher and I was her pupil. Eager to please and be pleased. It made me feel so confused. I can run a boardroom and plan a takeover but she had shown me how little I knew about myself and my body. She had shown me what it is to be loved by another woman. I wanted more and knew I could never go back to being hetero.

  My contractions began to ebb away, and Penny stood up to kiss me deeply, easing the bullet out of my pussy. It took me a while to come down and we stood there kissing and touching. I ran my fingers over her stiff nipples and cupped a breast in my hand as she pulled me to her. I didn’t want her to let me go. I felt so safe there. All I wanted right then was for her to hold me tight, squeezing me in her arms.

  “What about you?” I asked whispering into her neck as I kissed it,

  “It’s okay I’m going to have it later, I don’t mind missing out, this was for you,” she bit into my neck.

  “Couldn’t have you missing out on Valentine’s entirely.” She traced a finger from my pussy up between my breasts to my lips and pressed it to them with her mouth.

  “Besides,” she said,

  “I brought myself off before you came in.”

  She made me laugh. I was so grateful to her. I kissed her, longing for the moment to last, but we didn’t have much time left to ourselves.

  We both got dressed and managed to get back to my main office as the other girls came back from lunch. They were all laughing and joking and said we had missed a good lunch. Penny, ever quick on the uptake said she had grabbed a quick nibble and she didn’t want to spoil her appetite for dinner. She gave me a wink.

  I watched her leave later from the window of my office. Easily distinguishable in her red dress, I watched until she disappeared into the early evening crowd, jealous of her boyfriend but happy for her.

  I saw Penny the next day. She was distraught. Her boyfriend hadn’t proposed. He had called her on her mobile to say he was breaking up with her and couldn’t go through with the Valentine’s Day dinner they had planned. The poor girl was devastated so I gave her the day off and went around to her flat after work. We spent the night together and now we are going steady. Give it a while and we will see where it goes, but I am happier than I have ever been; and Penny, well, she is happier too. It’s difficult having a relationship with someone at work. Especially when you work so close and Penny has been thinking of changing her career. If she leaves, you can bet I’m going to give her a great reference.

  ***

  Amanda’s story ended. We had finished off most of the wine curled up on the sofa.

  “Penny won’t mind you’re coming out to me?” I asked.

  “Oh no, not at all. We find the idea of you writing about our get-together exciting. We read erotic books and surf for pink porn together. It gets us both going. Our sex life is great. She says she doesn’t miss having a man around at all. In fact, she says her life is so much better without one.”

  “That’s great.”

  “Yes it is” she said.

  “I’ll drink to that.”

  So Amanda and Penny are together and it sounds like Penny’s ex is missing out on some serious fun. It’s typical. Men don’t know how good they have got it until they lose it. Right, girls?

  Anya - The Barista

  Anya and I met through a mutual friend a while ago and have been firm friends ever since. She has a different man in tow each time. They are generally rich. The girl has expensive tastes; but they certainly get their money’s worth. A typical East-European, long blonde hair, blue eyes and legs which go all the way to heaven. She used to work in Trade Marks, then as a waitress, shop assistant in a high-end boutique and restaurant manager but gave them all up after a few months; she is a restless, free spirit. She ended up working as a barista in a coffee shop in Central London. It caters for city boys with expensive racing bikes. You know the type, all tight cycling gear, padded bums and even more padded crotches. Anya told me a story the other day that proved it’s not all padding.

  ***

  The coffee shop where I work is not a straightforward coffee shop. It’s a bike shop, bike store, bike repair shop and coffee shop, locker room, all rolled into one. There are changing rooms and showers and places to store the bikes. Young execs who are into cycling can cycle into the City, shower, change into their workgear, walk or catch the tube to work, come back in the evening, change and cycle home. They don’t have to go to the gym, they save on rail fa
res, its far quicker than driving and, well, I get to see cute buns in tight cycling gear all day long. It’s great, and I get paid for it.

  As the guys cycle a lot, they are extremely fit. Most of them haven’t got an ounce of fat on them. Behind the counter at the cafe, there is a window onto the alley where they ride in and I can watch as they arrive in their cycling gear. They are all hot and steamy from their morning ride. I love the smell of a man after a good workout, it gets me turned on. It’s strange the way men’s sweat smells different. I’ve never had two boyfriends smell the same. If I don’t find the smell of a man attractive, it’s an instant turn off. The odour I love is fresh sweat; like right after hard, fast sex, which is how I want it. If I can’t get my man to work up a sweat in bed, then I know he’s not going to last. Soft, romantic, fluffy sex doesn’t do it for me. It has to be fast and energetic. I have to feel my heart pumping in my chest as well as my man between my legs. It’s why I go through so many men: there aren’t many who can keep up with me. I burn them out fast. Unfortunately, the richer they are, the less fit they are.

  There was this one guy who used the coffee shop, Adrian. He worked as a dealer in a Bank. He was polite. Most of the guys can be offhand but he was always polite. He kept himself to himself and didn’t cycle in with the rest in a big pack. He started after them, around New Year; it must have been his New Year Resolution to get fit. I made it my personal goal to encourage him. He soon burned off his excess fat to reveal a good toned body. I noticed he was getting fitter as he got slimmer. Great thick thighs, long legs, broad chest, you could see he had a gorgeous flat stomach under his cycling vest. It made you want to run your fingers along the contours of his abs. He was keen, very focused; he had this intensity which gave me goose bumps; and his smell! Well, it sent me crazy.