Desiree

by Roberta Gellis

  Vachel pretended to perk up and ate faster, saying that perhaps he would take a chance and go out to see if he could meet them. Then he thanked the man who had provided him with the food and said he could do one small service for him by choosing the wine for the table. He had done the same several times in the past, and the cook only nodded.

  * * * * *

  Dinner was late that day because the hunt had produced more sport than anyone expected. An old boar had got caught up in the drive of game. Simon heard him snorting and squealing and snatched his boar spear from where it had been fastened to his saddle. Alex was down as quick as Simon. The huntsmen ran to hold the horses. Desiree bit her lips in terror for Alex, and Alinor cursed like a man-at-arms because she had no boar spear.

  Actually, Simon and Alex did not expect to kill the boar. With only two of them and most of the huntsmen driving the deer, they thought the boar would simply run past. Grabbing the spears was an irresistible impulse to the most dangerous sport in hunting—and boars are bad tempered. This one was worse tempered than most. With all the room he needed to pass on either side or even between Simon and Alex, he charged the men.

  Alex’s spear was just a bit off center and took the beast where the leg met the chest. As the enraged boar twisted toward, not away, from his pain, he caught Alex, already off balance, a hard blow with his shoulder, knocking him flat. Desiree shrieked and drew her knife, but the nearest huntsman forestalled her attempt to dismount. Alinor seized a javelin from another huntsman and drove her horse forward to stab the boar.

  Simon was impeded by barking, howling and milling hounds, which were leaping at the boar and incidentally stepping on Alex and preventing him from getting up. He dared not let go of the spear, which was seated in the ground and keeping the boar off him.

  Then like a clap of doom, Herne’s voice overrode all other sound. The dogs fell instantly silent and cowered away. Alinor’s hand tightened on her rein and halted her horse and Simon hesitated for just a moment; even the boar was startled silent. And Herne came behind the boar’s shoulder, gripped it by the nose and cut its throat.

  “Thank God I wore my oldest tunic,” Alex sighed as blood poured over him.

  Considering the excitement generated and the time spent in dressing out the game, it was not surprising that the hunters all trooped into Roselynde quite late for dinner. In the excited recounting of what happened, what each should have done instead of what they did do, Desiree’s scolding of Alex and his protests that he did not in any way try to draw the boar’s attention, Alinor’s complaint that no boar spear was provided for her and Simon’s passionate declaration that none ever would be, no one missed Vachel.

  When they finally sat down to eat, his empty place was noted but everyone remembered his severe headache. No one really wanted him there, so Alinor easily convinced herself that after dinner would be soon enough to look in on him. And since the meal was mostly of salt beef and pork—the lambs not having arrived and the cooks having no time to prepare the boar and venison—the wine was well watered and drunk quickly to assuage thirst.

  Sir Martin did mention that the wine had an odd flavor, but that was at the very end of the meal when everyone was picking at the sweet and savoury and sipping at the wine. When he spoke, Alinor’s eyes opened wide. She sipped her own wine, rolling it around her tongue, then hissed as angrily as a snake.

  “Vachel tried to poison us,” she said. “All of us, without the faintest regard for the innocent.”

  Desiree covered her mouth and looked anxiously at Alex, but he was red with rage and shame, struggling to get his legs out from under the table so he could get up.

  “I’ll kill him,” he muttered. “I’ll kill him.”

  “No, no,” Simon said, “then I would have to try you for murder. You would be acquitted, of course, but really this is not the time for you to be held in detention. I need you elsewhere.” Then he looked at his wife and sighed. “How does it come about that we are not all dead?”

  Alinor made a “do not be silly” gesture. “When Desiree told me that she and Alex suspected Vachel of killing Frewyn I went and looked through his baggage. I found a suspicious number of packets of powder.” She shrugged. “I burned them all and replaced them with my remedy for sore gums that could do us no harm and did not taste so terrible that you would spew wine all over the table.”

  Simon rolled his eyes. “You could have told me.”

  Alinor laughed deep in her throat, mouth open. “I had other things to do when we were alone than talk about my suspicions of Master Vachel.”

  “Let me at least beat him black-and-blue,” Alex pleaded.

  “By all means,” Simon said, chuckling.

  Alex struggled off the bench and rushed to the wall chamber that Vachel had been using, but Simon did not look in the least surprised when Alex barely stepped in and rushed back, crying that Vachel was gone.

  “I will go after him,” Alex said, so angry he choked on his words and tears of rage filled his eyes.

  “No,” Simon said calmly. “I would imagine he fled soon after he poisoned the wine. He is several hours on the road—which he probably did not take. Who knows which way he went or where he intends to hide himself? We will lay hands on him sooner or later—”

  “And if he goes back to France and Prince John hears that you and I are still alive,” Alinor remarked, smiling in a remarkably unpleasant way, “I do not envy Vachel his fate when John lays hands on him.”

  “What do you mean?” Simon asked Alinor.

  She shrugged. “He was John’s man but not interested in Roselynde’s fortifications or defense. He paid no attention to the men you brought back from Kingsclere. Thus he was not a spy seeking information. But he carried poison. What wager will you lay against mine that John sent him to kill you and possibly me.”

  “God preserve King Richard and free him soon,” Simon muttered, not taking Alinor’s wager. Then he said more loudly to Alex, “I do not want you wasting your time searching for one remarkably stupid assassin. You must bend your thoughts to planning what you will need to take Telscombe as soon as possible, I hope before Nicolaus has completed arming and supplying the place.”

  “No!” Desiree cried, swinging off the bench and catching at Alex’s arm. “No, you are my castellan—”

  “Desiree!” Alinor’s voice overrode whatever else Desiree was about to say. She pushed back her chair and stood up. “You will come with me! Now! What goes forward now is men’s talk and nothing to do with us.”

  Alex looked utterly befuddled by that statement since Alinor was always intimately involved in any plan Simon made. Color rose into Desiree’s face and her lips set mulishly as she looked stubbornly at Alinor. Neither had a chance to speak, however, as Alinor wrested Desiree’s hand from Alex’s arm, seized it in one of her own and yanked the lighter and frailer girl off in the direction of the stair to the women’s quarters.

  At first Desiree had been too shocked to make much more of a protest than hanging back, which served no purpose as Alinor was much stronger than she. However, when they reached the solar, she panted, “How dare you!”

  “I dare because I am very fond of Alex and I like you very much too. I did not wish to see you destroy Alex, yourself, and any hope of a good marriage between you.”

  “Oh, no,” Desiree spat, “you stopped me from forbidding Alex to assault Telscombe to save your own husband from the danger of the attack.”

  “No,” Alinor sighed, tears coming to her eyes. “If Simon has any intention of going to Telscombe, he will go. It would not matter what I felt. He knows what I feel and also knows that I will never interfere with his duty.”

  “Duty! What is duty? I want a live—’

  “A live what?” Alinor asked pointedly. “A male without duty and honor is a two-legged beast, not a man. You know what honor means to Alex. You have seen his hurt and shame over his brother’s behavior. Will you take that honor away from him?”

  “At the price of his l
ife?” Desiree wailed.

  “What life would he have without honor? What life would you have with him? How do you think he will feel about you if you beg him to turn aside from his duty because it holds danger? Will he ever trust you again?”

  “He will be alive! Who cares if he does not trust me!”

  “Do you not? Will you really enjoy it when he takes whores to his bed rather than you because he knows you will importune him to do what makes him hate himself?”

  Desiree stood staring at Alinor with tears running down her cheeks, and Alinor took her hand more gently and led her into her bedchamber. A low fire burned and the room smelled faintly of apples. Alinor sat her in a cushioned chair and took another opposite her.

  “Why do you say Alex will die if he tries to take Telscombe?” Alinor asked. “Do you know something of that keep that makes it specially perilous, something for some reason you do not wish to tell Alex?”

  “No, of course not. I only know that Telscombe stands on a high cliff, much higher than Exceat. Exceat was once attacked. Our men shot arrows at the attackers and they pushed away the scaling ladders so that the other men fell. There was so much screaming. So many must have died.”

  “Not nearly as many as you think. A lot of the screaming is apurpose to frighten each other.” Alinor sighed and reached out and patted Desiree’s hand. “I swear to you that Simon has taken many keeps and you see him here hale and hearty. Alex was with him when they took a very strong place not far from Clyro near Wales. Neither Alex nor Simon was hurt above some bruises.”

  “And you did not worry? You did not fear for him?”

  Alinor closed her eyes then opened them slowly. “Fear? There is such a weight on me when Simon rides away to war that I must force myself to breathe. Claws grip my throat. A cruel hand within knots my bowels so that my food lies like lead in my belly. Oh, yes. I know fear.”

  “And you do not beg him to bide with you?”

  “No, I do not.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I love Simon more than I love Alinor. To show Simon my pain and fear would hurt him. He would go to fight anyway. Simon cannot be turned from his duty. But instead of going with a light heart and his thoughts fixed only on the best way to win, he would be worrying about me.”

  Desiree bit her lip but did not speak. “Worse,” Alinor continued, “might not my fear for him shake his confidence in himself? Why should I fear if I trusted his skill in arms? Might my face streaked with tears rise up when he was hard-pressed and remind him that if he dies I will be alone? Would that cause his hand to falter? Would he be less ferocious in attack and thus more easily beaten? Oh, no. I send my husband off with smiles or, sometimes, with laughing threats of what I will do to him if he does not take care and come home safe.”

  Desiree listened to this long speech with wide eyes and parted lips. Several times when Alinor mentioned the evil that could befall a man who had a whining wife she winced.

  “But surely it is to the king’s benefit that Nicolaus be out of Telscombe,” she said. “Surely the loyal barons would be willing to come and bring men. Why should Alex take Telscombe? Why did he thank Simon as if he had never been given so great a gift?”

  Alinor giggled faintly. “Because that is how he felt. If Alex takes Telscombe and Nicolaus dies, which Alex will make sure happens, Simon promised to seizin Alex with Telscombe.”

  Desiree shifted uncomfortably. “That— I suppose that is very generous, but why should Alex care. The lands of Exceat are surely enough—”

  “Desiree!” Alinor exclaimed impatiently. “The lands of Exceat belong to you, not to Alex.”

  “What does that matter when we are married and one?”

  Alinor looked at the other woman as if she were mad. “Do not be such a fool. What is yours must remain yours only. What will happen to you if Alex dies—not in war, but of some illness—and your next husband, who may not be what Alex is, sees that you had given all to him. Will he not expect to take everything also?” She shook her head impatiently. “In any case, if Alex is the man I believe he is, he will not permit you to alienate what is yours. Which leaves him…where? Tell me what Alex has said again and again when you told him Frewyn had already paid the fine for you to marry as you wished.”

  Desiree looked troubled. “Could I not settle lands on him so that they were his?”

  A look of acute pain crossed Alinor’s face at the idea of giving away lands, but all she said was, “I doubt he would accept. He would feel that you were buying him. He would, I think, rather be an honest castellan, paid for his work. And all this is not to the point. Alex will take Telscombe not to gain the lands but because it is his duty to do so. I do not believe that anything you can say or do will turn him from that duty. All you can do is make his heart heavy and weaken him.”

  “I do not believe you,” Desiree whispered.

  Alinor shrugged. “I learned what I have told you from my grandmother, who lived through Stephen’s reign when the country was all at war. She saw my grandfather go out to fight battle after battle. She told me when she was dying that she thought the pain and pounding of her heart in those times had overworn it so that it failed—although she was more than twenty years younger than my grandsire, who lived well into his eighth decade, and died in his bed despite all the battles.”

  “I will not let him go to fight an unnecessary battle,” Desiree said stubbornly.

  “Then you will lose him, one way or another. He is very much in love, so it is possible that you can turn him from his duty. Then he will hate himself and soon hate you. Or he will be disgusted by your lack of understanding and honor and turn away from you. Or, last, he will do his duty filled with doubts and fears and perhaps die because of them.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Although she burned and froze alternately with resentment and fear, Desiree was sufficiently impressed with what Alinor had said to be careful in the protests she made to Alex about taking Telscombe. Fortunately her fear was somewhat lessened by the cautions that Simon urged. Among the discussions of the number of men Alex should have, the uses to which they should be put and the supplies they would need, Simon made clear that the first step must be a careful examination of the keep and the area.

  Alinor had urged Desiree to remain in Roselynde. It would be safer she pointed out, in case Nicolaus, realizing that Alex had stripped Exceat for his attack, tried to seize her. But Desiree had refused with such heat that Alinor had sighed and given up. She suspected from the way Desiree’s eyes devoured Alex that the girl had more reasons to want to be in Exceat than to convince him not to take Telscombe.

  It seemed to Desiree that she would not have too much difficulty in diverting Alex from Telscombe. His response when she hinted of times and places they could be together when they reached Exceat was somewhat embarrassed but very eager, and he admitted that he had spoken of the possibility of their marriage to Simon, who had not rejected him out of hand. And his eyes were glazed with desire when she caught him for just a moment for one hard kiss before they parted for the night in the keep where they guested.

  Still she was tense and anxious before they had passed Telscombe itself. Then she felt relief until, out of sight of the keep, Alex halted their cortege and sent two men-at-arms back to watch the road. Desiree turned her mare and brought it up beside Lothaire, who snorted but did not attack Desiree’s mount.

  “Do you expect to be pursued?” she asked in a low, anxious voice. “Would it not be wiser then to continue toward Exceat as quickly as possible?”

  “No, no,” Alex assured her, also speaking softly. Godric glanced at them and gestured the men a few yards farther down the road. “There is no danger,” Alex continued. “It is true that Telscombe controls this road, but Nicolaus is not going to turn reaver and bring the wrath of the sheriff down on his head when he hopes to hold the coast open for Prince John’s invasion.”

  “Then why did you send those men to watch the road behind us?”

&nbs
p; Alex smiled. “Only the very slim chance that Nicolaus himself or another who recognized you saw us. To capture you might be worth the risk to him. It is very unlikely but I wish to be sure because I am going to send you on to Exceat with Godric and most of the men.”

  “Send me on? Are you not coming home?”

  “Not yet. Having seen our whole party pass Telscombe, a few men riding the other way unencumbered by any baggage should wake no interest. I will stay behind with five men-at-arms and we will see what the defenses really are.”

  The shock Desiree felt at Alex’s words was so much the greater because he had seemed to show no interest in the keep while they passed, not even glancing up at the cliff. She had been so sure he would bring her to Exceat, and that once she had him there she would be able to convince him that love was better than war.

  “But…but I want you to come with me to Exceat,” Desiree murmured. “I…I have missed our being together.”

  “I too,” he assured her, his voice shaking a little.

  “Then come with me.”

  He hung his head and sighed. “I wish I could…or perhaps I do not wish it. What we did… I cannot regret it but, Desiree, I had no right… But it does not matter. This is the best chance I will have to examine Telscombe and I must take it.”

  What she wanted to say was “You fool. You will be hurt, killed, and I left to mourn still another.” But she had seen his pride when she had asked whether he was fit to protect Exceat and his look of confidence when he replied that he was fit. Alinor’s words rang in her ears. She did not dare shake that confidence.

  So what she said was, pettishly, “Why? Why is the burden of Telscombe set on you? Give me a reason. I do not care for Telscombe and I am your liege lady.”

  He smiled at her. “But remember I swore to obey in all matters other than war.”

  “But you are making the war. No one has attacked us.”

  Alex shrugged. “Reason? It is my duty, Desiree. First and most important is to see that the coast of Sussex is prepared to repel any invasion. Nicolaus is a traitor who will invite Prince John to land. I must be rid of him.”