Can't Stop the Feeling

by Maria Geraci

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Today was a big day. The city council was set to vote on Nora’s offer. Ben had the chamber of commerce on his side, and they were putting pressure on Mimi Grant. He had Larry Jefferson and Denise Holbert’s vote too, but he needed one more for the win.

  And it couldn’t be Jenna’s vote. He wanted her to vote the way her conscience decreed with no influence from him whatsoever. Not that she’d allow herself to be influenced by anyone. She’d do what she thought was best for the city. Period. It was one of the many reasons he admired her. She and Gus and Pilar were staunchly in the no column.

  Which meant, the whole thing would end in another tie.

  Now that Mom was packed up and ready to move, he didn’t have a reason to linger around Whispering Bay anymore. He could continue Nora’s suit against the city from his Miami office.

  Except he did have a reason to stay. He needed to get things settled with Jenna. He’d put Gavin on buying a private plane ASAP. After he took care of this thing with We Gotcha first. Strange, Gavin hadn’t updated him since yesterday, which was unusual.

  Ben pulled out his phone. Shit. His battery was dead. He’d been so exhausted when he’d come in last night he’d hadn’t bothered to charge it. He plugged it in then grabbed his second coffee of the morning and watched in amusement as Tiffany came shuffling into the kitchen.

  “Good morning,” she mumbled, scratching the top of her blonde head. “Did I miss Rachel?”

  “Mom just took her to preschool.”

  “Did you get Pat all packed up?”

  He nodded. “We stayed till midnight while Rachel slept on the couch, but it’s done. We didn’t get back here till almost one.”

  “No wonder I didn’t hear you come in.” She opened the refrigerator door and pulled out a carton of eggs and a bowl of fresh fruit. “Want an omelet?”

  “No thanks. I’m waiting for my cell to charge up so I can check my messages. Gavin was supposed to call me with an update. You haven’t heard from him, have you?”

  “On the new half-way house?”

  He hesitated. “No. He’s working on something personal.”

  Tiffany turned to look at him. “Oh?”

  He shrugged. Tiffany was probably the closest thing he had to a best friend. She’d find out about Jenna sooner or later. He just wasn’t sure how to begin. There’s this girl…

  “So you’re probably wondering why I showed up on your doorstep yesterday morning. No worries, I’m not a permanent houseguest. As a matter of fact, I need to head back to Miami this afternoon.”

  “Stay as long as you like. You don’t need an invitation with me.”

  “I know but I always feel so needy around you. For once I want to be the one who helps you and not the other way around. I don’t want you to think I came up here because I couldn’t handle something on my own.”

  “You’re not that girl anymore. You’re a smart, capable woman. And a great business partner and friend.”

  “God, you’re good for my ego.”

  Ben smiled ruefully. No matter how much fame or money Tiffany had, she was still that scared girl who thought she was never good enough. “We make a good team.”

  “Yes, we do. Which brings me to why I’m here. I had to tell you in person. I’ve met someone. Well, it’s someone you know, actually.”

  “Fred Dawson,” he automatically said. She dropped her jaw in an exaggerated way that made him chuckle. “I saw the way the two of you looked at one another at the last board meeting. I figured it was just a matter of time before you told me.”

  Fred Dawson was a family counselor who acted as a liaison to their foundation. He was in his late thirties, wore glasses and had a bit of a paunch around the middle. He was also one of the nicest guys Ben had ever met. And completely perfect for Tiffany.

  “We’ve only been seeing each other a couple of months, but we’re already talking marriage.” Her eyes softened. “And babies.”

  “He’s a lucky guy.”

  “I’m a lucky girl. And since you’re the closest thing I have to either a father or a brother, he wants to officially ask your permission for my hand.”

  “Do guys still do that?”

  “Apparently so.” She sighed. “I think it’s adorable.”

  He hugged her. “I’m happy for you, kid.”

  “Thanks! You know what they say. The third time’s a charm.”

  “So will I be doing the prenup?” he asked.

  She popped a grape into her mouth. “It’s strange, this time I’m the one with the money. Not that he’s a pauper or anything. Fred does really well for himself, but…”

  “But he’s not in your league.”

  “Not financially, no.” She held his gaze. “Would you think I was crazy, as a friend and as the world’s best attorney, if I told you I don’t want a prenup?”

  Ben smiled. “Good for you.”

  She laughed. “Love makes you do crazy things, huh?”

  He was about to automatically answer that he wouldn’t know, but that wasn’t exactly true. “I’ve met someone, too.”

  Her eyes widened. “You’re kidding! How awesome is—wait, please don’t tell me she has red hair and her name is Jenna.”

  “Why do I not like the way that sounds?”

  Tiffany crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the kitchen counter. “She came by here yesterday evening looking for you. Let’s just say we didn’t exactly get along.”

  “What did you tell her?”

  “The truth. That you were packing up your mom. And, I hate to say this, Ben, but she’s a little feisty. To put it nicely.”

  “Tell me about it.” He couldn’t help but grin. “She can be a real pain in the ass.”

  He hadn’t wanted to listen to the things Jenna had told him about his mom and Carl. But she’d been right. Yesterday while they’d been packing he’d observed them together. All this time it had been right there under his nose and he hadn’t seen it. Because he hadn’t wanted to see it.

  “You do like her.”

  He didn’t say anything.

  Her face showed her surprise. “You more than just like her.”

  “It’s complicated, but yeah.”

  “Yikes. I’m afraid I might have run her off. For some reason she thought you’d be home last night.”

  “Shit.” He raked a hand through his hair. “She wanted to help me pack Mom up, but I told her there wasn’t much to do.”

  “So you did lie to her.”

  He stilled. “Is that what she said?”

  “Not in so many words, but essentially, yes. Why didn’t you let her help?” Before he could answer, Tiffany got a knowing look in her eye. “Does she know about the foundation? And how that got started?”

  When he didn’t say anything, she sighed. “Ben, I love you. You’re like the really cute-annoyingly-smart-big-brother-with-the-heart-of-gold I never had. But if you don’t open up and let this girl into your life, you’re going to lose her.”

  * * *

  Jenna wasn’t at the office. According to the receptionist, she’d called and said she wouldn’t be in till this afternoon. Was she sick? He drove to her place and knocked on her door. She answered it right away, like she’d been expecting him. They stood there a few seconds looking at one another. She wore leggings and a T-shirt and sneakers. Her face was flushed, and a light sheen of perspiration covered her forehead. He must have just caught her after a run.

  It occurred to him that he should have brought flowers. Or champagne. Or diamonds. Or all of the above.

  “Hey there,” she said. It was hard to gauge her mood, but she didn’t seem angry. Or particularly happy to see him either.

  “I’ve come to beg for mercy.” She didn’t smile at that. “I’m sorry I didn’t return your call last night. My phone died and… Can I come in?”

  “Sure.” She took a seat in an oversized chair leaving him to sit on the couch. There was a glass of wine on the coffee table in f
ront of her. It was ten in the morning and she was drinking. Which couldn’t be good. Her gaze followed his. “I’d offer you a glass, but you don’t drink, do you?”

  He shook his head.

  She shrugged. “I suppose you have a perfectly good reason for that, not that it’s any of my business. Normally, I don’t drink this early in the morning, but today is kind of special.”

  He didn’t like the way that sounded.

  “You’re not going to make this easy on me, are you?”

  “No.”

  “Good. Because I don’t deserve it.”

  She reached out and took a sip of her wine. “So that’s how you’re going to play it, huh? Poor me, I’m such a bad guy and I don’t—”

  “I don’t drink because Jake’s dad was an abusive asshole. He used to come home drunk and beat the shit of my mother. Seeing someone drunk…it disgusts me. Sometimes just the smell of beer makes my stomach turn.”

  She set down her glass. “At first, I thought maybe you were an alcoholic, but then I began to wonder if it was something like that.” She shuddered. “I’m sorry. Your poor mom.”

  “Jake’s dad wasn’t the only one who used to knock my mom around.”

  She let out a sigh. “I get it, Ben. You had a shitty childhood.”

  “Not really. I had a great mom, a roof over my head and I can honestly say I never went to bed hungry. So, not the greatest childhood, but certainly not the worst.”

  “I Googled you and Tiffany last night.”

  “Jenna, I—”

  “I’m impressed. No, really. You’re like this super power couple.” She reached over to the coffee table and picked up a pile of papers. “I copied all this off the Internet. For my scrapbook.” She cleared her throat and began to read. “Ben Harrison and Tiffany McAdams, co-founders of the New Life Foundation, a non-profit that helps survivors of domestic violence break the cycle of abuse through empowerment, education and…” She shrugged. “I’m sure you know the rest.”

  “I should have told you about that.”

  “How many half-way houses have the two of you built?”

  “We’re on our seventh.”

  “No wonder you need a personal assistant with an M.B.A. Gavin not only essentially runs Roar, he also helps with the foundation, right?” She didn’t sound neutral anymore.

  “Can I explain here?”

  “By all means.”

  “It’s not that I didn’t want to tell you about the foundation, it’s that—”

  “What? It was too personal? Or, wait, it just never came up in the conversation.”

  “I don’t talk about it to anyone, Jenna. It’s just something I do. Not because I want a pat on the back or accolades or anything.”

  “I didn’t think I was just anyone.”

  “You’re not just anyone.” Fuck. None of this was coming out right.

  “I took Tiffany’s case when no other attorney in Miami would touch it because I felt sorry for her. She got married at seventeen to a guy who used to beat the living crap out of her. She was lucky, though, she was able to get away. Arthur Clendenin was a good guy. He gave her back some of her self-esteem and, yeah, I saw a little of my mom in her, too. We started the foundation with some of the money that she won in the settlement.”

  Jenna nodded. “I read all that last night. So tell me something I don’t know.”

  “The thing you won’t read, because it isn’t public, is my mom’s story. She helps with the foundation behind the scenes, but she doesn’t feel comfortable being in the spotlight.”

  She took a slow sip of her wine. “I get it. I really do. But why did you lie to me yesterday? You told me you didn’t need help packing up your mom, but clearly, you did. Tiffany said she’d been there almost all day helping, and obviously, so were you. What? Are you ashamed of where you grew up? I thought we were way past that.”

  “It’s stupid, I know it is, but it’s like, that’s one part of my life and you’re another part—the part that’s good. And I didn’t want to mix them up.”

  “And that’s it?”

  “What else do you want me to say? I know it was wrong. I’m sorry, okay? It won’t happen again.”

  “Do you know how I felt yesterday when I came to your house and Tiffany opened the door? Why didn’t you tell me she was here in town?”

  “I didn’t think it was important.”

  She snorted in disbelief. “Bullshit. You didn’t tell me because you were afraid I was going to think there was something going on between you two.”

  “There is absolutely nothing going on between Tiffany and me.”

  “That’s where you’re dead wrong. There’s everything going on between you two. Everything that really counts anyway.” He opened his mouth to speak but she put her hand up. “Oh, I know it’s not romantic. You said you were just friends, and I believe you. But she knows the real Ben Harrison. I only know the guy you want me to know.”

  He could feel everything slipping away. This wasn’t how he wanted to tell her, but he had no choice. He had to lay all his cards on the table. “You know why I’m here? I’m here to tell you that I’m falling in love with you and that I want us to be together. I’ve never said that to another woman, Jenna. Not ever.”

  For a second, there was something in her eyes that made him think it was all going to be okay, but then she shook her head, and it was like she was shaking him out of her life. “I’m sorry, Ben, but you’re about thirteen years too late.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “The way you say you feel about me? That’s how I felt about you thirteen years ago, and you completely shut me out, and that’s okay because I got over it. Eventually. But then you came back into my life…and you made me feel the same way all over again. I’m not falling in love with you, Ben, I am in love with you, and I thought this time we might have a chance, but then it happened all over again. Yesterday you shut me out again. Only it hurt ten times more than it did the first time. But I’m not going to lose my temper and yell. I’m not even going to cry, because I did all my crying last night.”

  “That’s it? One mistake and we’re done? You’re not even going to give me another shot?”

  “Yesterday, I needed you more than I’ve ever needed anyone in my life. And you weren’t there for me. If you were out of town on business or were in the hospital or anything else that made sense, I’d be fine with that because I’m a big girl and I can take care of my own mistakes. But…” She shook her head. “I can’t talk about this anymore. I just can’t. I have to take a shower and pull myself together for the city council meeting. Please, just leave.”

  Her bottom lip quivered like she was trying hard not to cry. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. He’d envisioned coming over here and telling her how he felt about her and then…riding off into the damn sunset or whatever else was supposed to happen when two people were in love.

  “I’m not going to leave until I fix this. Is this about the video? Gavin is—”

  “It’s not about the video. It’s about the fact that for some reason you don’t trust me enough to let me into your life. And that’s okay. I know you’re a good guy, Ben. You’re just not a good guy for me.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Jenna wore a navy blue power suit with matching heels and a white silk shirt with pearls. If she was going to go down, then she might as well go down looking her best. Kate would have it no other way. But she didn’t plan to fail today. She’d worked too long and too hard to just give up. All she had to do was stick to the plan. It would work. Because it had to.

  Mimi and Pilar found her walking up and down the hallway in front of her office. “Are you all right?” Mimi asked. “Darlene said you sounded sick on the phone.”

  “I’m fine,” Jenna said. “But I need to talk to both of you before the meeting. In private.”

  Pilar made a face. “This sounds bad.”

  “It might be.”

  They were about to walk
into her office when she spotted Ben talking to Nora and Vince Palermo in the lobby. They were huddled, like they were discussing strategy. “What’s going on?” she asked Mimi.

  “Ben asked if he could speak on behalf of his clients before the vote. It only seemed fair that we let him.”

  “I see.” The scene this morning with Ben was something she didn’t want to think about. Today was the most important day in her career. It would make her or break her. She had to do hold it together for the next two hours. Then she could fall apart. But not now.

  Don’t look at him. As long as you don’t look at him, you’ll be okay.

  But it was hard to forget what they’d said to one another. Especially what he’d said.

  I’m here to tell you that I’m falling in love with you and that I want us to be together. I’ve never said that to another woman, Jenna. Not ever.

  How many times had she dreamed of Ben saying that to her? Too many to count. She’d come so close to throwing herself into his arms, but in the end, it came down to one thing. He didn’t trust her enough to share his life with her. His real life.

  Mimi glanced at her watch. “We have about five minutes before the meeting starts so—Zeke, what are you doing here?”

  Jenna whipped around to see Whispering Bay’s chief of police walking up behind her.

  “Ladies,” Zeke said greeting all three of them with a smile. “I’m here because Jenna called and asked me to come to the meeting today.” He looked at Jenna. “Or did I get the wrong message?”

  “No, you got the right message. Thank you for coming.” She studied his face, but there was nothing in his polite, friendly manner that would make her think he’d seen the video. Or, if he had seen it, then maybe Ben was right. It was too dark to make anything out clearly. And the footage was only visual. No audio involved. If it was too dark to see anything and they couldn’t hear what was going on, it would be impossible to identify them.