Clear As Day

by Babette James

  And Nate and you will never be like Dad and Mother. Nate never flirts to get a jealous rise out of you, to make a fight. The jealousy crap never comes up. You’re not whacked out of your head with passion and drama. Look, Nate says he loves you, and he doesn’t need to throw a temper tantrum or break anything when Dave kisses you. He knows Dave’s teasing. Dad or Anthony would have thrown a major fit. Nate doesn’t sulk when you laugh with Lloyd, dance with Scott, or chat with Mark. You’re friends. That is why you have a shot at making this work with Nate.

  What if she trusted him only to find out she was wrong?

  What if he’s the one and you cut him loose because you’re a coward? What if you trust him and find out love can prove true?

  What if what you’re feeling right now with Nate is really love the way it should be?

  Stop worrying. Be happy.

  Nate and Dave were deep in quiet conversation and campfire building. A last slice of the fading sunset washed Nate in soft gold light, contrasting with the deepening twilight blues of the shadows. He was so beautiful. A giddy lightness rushed through Kay, and she broke out in a smile.

  Dave winked at her, and nudged Nate. Nate pivoted, looking confused, his train of thought obviously broken, and Dave shoved him into motion.

  Nate slipped his arm around her waist. “You look happy.”

  “I am.” Confused, yes, but at the moment, mostly happy. Happy felt good.

  Dave finished with the campfire, and the small driftwood blaze crackled merrily. He stood back, arms folded over his bare chest, eyeing the sparks, deep in thought, and then nodded to himself.

  The scene of his thoughtful expression and the firelight flickering over his skin caught her and Nate at the same moment, because Nate swung around and caught up his camera, smoothly adjusting his settings on the move, and took several shots before Dave noticed.

  Dave just shook his head and laughed. “A beautiful, sexy woman at your side and you’re taking pictures of me. You’re so weird, pal.”

  “I need s’mores,” JoAnn announced. “The baby wants s’mores, too. Anyone else ready for dessert?”

  Laughter bounced around the camp.

  Soon the scent of toasted marshmallow and warm chocolate filled the camp.

  JoAnn polished off her first with happy noises. “Oh, these are good. Flashing back to childhood here.”

  Even the guys got into the treat, starting up a running challenge on the most perfectly toasted marshmallow and the most alien-blob-life-form toasting gone terribly wrong.

  Kay bit into her s’more, and the gooey warm marshmallow and chocolate slid and squished between the crisp, crumbling graham crackers. Giggling as she caught the cracker crumbs, she took another bite of the sweet, messy treat.

  S’mores were one of the good memories of childhood days at the lake. Dad choosing the right toasting sticks. Dad taking her burnt marshmallows and giving her his perfectly toasted ones, swearing with a straight face that the black marshmallows were the best and she didn’t know what she was missing.

  But remembering the good times cracked open the door to the bad, as well…Didn’t I tell you how to do that once already, Kay…No, damn it, not that way…If you can’t keep up, you should have stayed—

  Slam that door. Focus on the positive. Focus on the now.

  She swallowed hard, jammed the old pain down and away, and licked the sticky trailing strings of sugar from her lips. Focus on the now…She looked up, into Nate’s eyes full of rich warmth and amusement.

  “Missed some.” Nate’s easy, seductive smile raised shivers through her. He leaned over and kissed the chocolate from her lips, sensuously tasting and grazing with teasing licks and bites. He laced one hand into her hair, cradling her head, keeping her close.

  She slipped her hand to rest at his nape. Everything faded from her mind but Nate and chocolate and the deep, sweet kiss.

  ****

  Hell of a great kiss, oh, yeah. Nate sank into the slow, hot rush. Kay’s mouth was sweet and soft, her unbraided hair rippled silk, and as her body relaxed against his, the fire and their friends faded from thought. He soaked it all in: the chocolate, the sugar, her breath feathering over his skin. The brush and sway of her body against his drove his blood south and left his head buzzing. Kissing Kay was the best sugar rush.

  Applause and catcalls broke them apart from the kiss.

  “Judges, I rate that one a perfect ten,” Patti called out, which prompted a scattering of teasing laughter and more silly scores.

  “Nine point nine.”

  “Are you kidding? Eleven and a half.”

  “I think they better try it again, so we can be sure here. Coulda been a fluke.” Dave winked and skewered two marshmallows.

  Kay blushed, and her smile came out of hiding.

  Nate kissed her again, just because. This was one of those perfect moments in life where he felt like he could walk on water without the benefit of the ski rope. Every hour he was more in love with Kay than ever.

  Please let the good vibes he was feeling from her mean his easy, low-pressure plan was paying off.

  The music ended and s’mores finished led to sitting back with drinks and lazy conversation around the glimmering coals of the fire. Kay sat off to the side in a lighthearted conversation with Patti, Margie and JoAnn. He’d gotten corralled into a fishing conversation with Dave, R.J., Mark, and Lloyd. Yeah, R.J. knew his stuff, but Nate had heard more about bonefish and tarpon over the past two days than he ever wanted to know. R.J. had been flirting hard and heavy with April, Patti and Pippa all evening and left Olivia watching him make an ass of himself. The guy did not know when to turn it down, and talking fishing with the man was pretty much more of the same.

  Nate felt for Olivia, who seemed nice enough on her own, but the Harpers’ unending conflict scraped on his nerves, and all day he’d caught Kay’s scattered flinches at the simmering tension between the couple. He was beyond fed up with their issues bothering Kay.

  He hovered in the talk, biding his time to escape and snag her away.

  “We were lucky this year Scott’s mom took the boys with such short notice. Brave woman.” Patti fake-shuddered and laughed.

  “Your twins are sweethearts and you know it.” JoAnn smiled and caressed her belly.

  “I love my boys to pieces, but Ryan and Sam can make the Energizer Bunny look like a slug. We needed this vacation.”

  “Honestly, you should bring them next year. You said Scott’s teaching them to fish. They know how to swim. They’d have a blast.”

  For so many years, these trips had been singles only. Now most of them had paired off. Were they seeing an end to the trips, as had almost happened this year, or just an inexorable metamorphosis into something different as his friends started bringing children?

  For a moment he imagined their camp with children underfoot, all the laughter and excitement, and, yes, even the whining he remembered from camping with his two brothers and sister.

  The picture was good.

  And he wanted it with a fierceness that stunned him.

  Time to take Kay fishing and work on making it happen. He hated to drag Kay away while she was enjoying herself. He wanted to get her away for just himself tonight on the boat, to relax, spend time together. No pressure. A little fishing. A little kissing…

  At R.J.’s next hearty laugh, JoAnn gave the man a narrow-eyed stare and briskly clapped her hands. “So, who’s up for Monopoly? Kay?”

  “Great. I’m in. Nate, you’re still going fishing, right? Or do you want to play with us?” Kay grinned and turned to Margie. “Monopoly’s another longstanding tradition here.”

  Damn, too late. And he had talked with Dave about fishing tonight. “Right. Fishing.”

  The fireside groupings broke up, and those who didn’t play either headed off to prepare for fishing or joined the cheering section. Pippa and Patti ordered JoAnn to stay in her seat, and they took over prepping for the annual marathon Monopoly game.

  “I�
�m pregnant, not fragile.”

  “And this is our chance to fuss over you. Get over it, put your feet up, and relax.” Patti refilled JoAnn’s cup of lemonade. “Your days of relaxation are numbered, so take advantage while you can.”

  “R.J., please. You promised.” Olivia’s soft voice was loud in a momentary lull in the conversations, just as Kay was ready to take her place at the game. The Harpers faced off over at the water’s edge in a low-voiced icy conversation.

  “It’s my vacation, too. Shit, you knew I was planning to fish,” R.J.’s voice snapped out. The rest of the couple’s sharp words dropped too low to catch until R.J.’s pissed-off, “Fuck it!” slammed the end on the argument. He snatched up his pole and tackle box and splashed out to Lloyd’s boat.

  Olivia stood there, hands on hips, head hanging. Most everyone shifted, each trying to pretend he or she hadn’t seen anything.

  Tension froze Kay and shadowed her eyes, but she wasn’t watching R.J. or Olivia. She was staring like a lost soul into the dying campfire. Wherever the couple’s argument had sent her in her head, it was not a good place.

  Time to get Kay out of here. Decision made, whether she agreed or not.

  “Let’s go.” Nate caught her hand and began leading her toward the trail to Skunk Beach. He got her five steps along before she snapped to and halted.

  “Nate, I’m playing, you know that.” She looked over to Olivia with troubled eyes.

  “Oh, go on, Kay, go play with Nate, you’ll have much more fun with him.” JoAnn waved them off. “Olivia? Hey, come on, I need a new Monopoly partner.” She patted the seat beside her. “We’ve made some twists to the old rules. Partners rock.”

  Olivia straightened with a tight inhale and small shudder.

  Patti pulled the vodka and tonic water from the ice chest. “Come on, Olivia. I’m pouring.”

  Nate tamped down his caveman urge to grab Kay, toss her over his shoulder and haul her off. Instead, he kept his grip on her hand and stroked his free hand over her arm as he kept his voice smooth and casual. “Come on, babe, let’s get away and go fishing tonight. We haven’t been out on the Whisper together yet.”

  “Patti, hon, pour me one of those while you’re at it.” Dave swaggered over and settled into the chair across from JoAnn.

  Dave not going fishing? That was a first.

  Then Dave gave Nate a sharp get-your-ass-going nod. Ah, helping.

  Kay pulled free of Nate’s hand. Her desperate look to Dave stabbed an icy jolt to his heart.

  “You got it, Davey. Be my partner in the game? Scott’s abandoned me for fish again. Can you believe it?”

  Dave laughed and sprawled out in his chair. “Go on, Kay. Like it’s any kind of decision. Play with Nate or play with play money and listen to my bad jokes?”

  “Livie, you can be my partner. We’ll take over the board.” JoAnn winked at Olivia and rubbed her hands with an animated cackle that dissolved into the giggles.

  Come on, Kay, choose me.

  Kay turned to him. Her wary eyes softened.

  He held out his hand.

  ****

  The gazes of all her friends, old and new, pressed on Kay.

  Nate waited, patiently giving her the choice. He looked so relaxed in his posture, but his eyes were deep with pleading, begging her to come with him.

  She wanted to be part of the crowd. Safety in numbers, right? What if Nate wanted answers, decisions? Answers. She wasn’t ready.

  She caved. Like she always did. Why? Because he was Nate. She wasn’t caving like her sister Claire did, out of fear and apathy under Anthony’s temper tantrums and abuse. He wasn’t R.J., demanding his way every moment.

  This was different. Nate was different. She needed to remember that and stop listening to the ghosts of her past.

  She took his hand. “Folks, I pass tonight. We’re going fishing.”

  That boyish, irresistible smile of his broke across his face and chased off the chill of her anxieties like sunlight.

  They took the Whisper out for a long, leisurely evening troll, and then Nate anchored back at Skunk Beach’s sheltered cove, where they continued fishing in peaceable quiet under the stars. The easy wash of water and soft clop of wavelets against the hull and the assorted creaks and clinks of Nate’s pride and joy created a music of its own. Dark shadows of bats streaked by in their wild air hunts. Coyotes’ yearning cries and yips punctuated the peace. Winks of lights here and there across the lake pinpointed other camps.

  Her tension slowly leached away. Nate caught a few, but released them. Her line hung neglected in the dark water, the bait probably long stolen. It didn’t matter. She’d always enjoyed the fishing far more than the catching.

  Fish don’t like chatterboxes…stop fidgeting…no, hold the pole the way I told…ugh, go wash, you stink of fish…ladies don’t—

  Enough!

  She shifted in her seat, and shifted her thoughts to the now. Her earlier anxiety over Nate cornering her for an answer had been for nothing. Instead of confrontation, he’d given her the relaxing evening she’d needed away from Olivia’s troubles and her own churned-up, muddy old memories. Instead of questions, he’d given her easy conversation scattered over the lazy, quiet fishing.

  With her legs stretched out on the cushion of the bench seat, she half-drowsed, enjoying the cool of the night and watching Nate.

  He sat opposite her at the stern end of his bench, relaxed, his eyes distant beyond the dark water and moonrise, occasionally twitching or reeling his line. Moonlight painted him in silver and shadow. The breeze kept the mosquitoes at bay and ruffled those unexpected curls.

  She fiddled with his ring, twisting the band about on her finger, the white gold and small diamonds winking like those camp lights. He said he loved her. What he offered and called love—what she had always called friendship—if it was love, was so different from the chaos named love she’d grown up with. His was peaceful.

  Very tempting.

  I love you, she practiced. If this is love, I’m pretty sure I love you, too.

  Focus on the positive. If you don’t give this relationship a chance, it definitely won’t work, but if you do try, it might.

  Relationship? The “R” word was almost as bad as the “L” word.

  He deserved an answer. That scared bundle of nerves tightened, choking off the words she wanted to say. This wasn’t a sketch or a painting she could do over. She wanted to say yes. She wanted to say yes, with qualifications. Explanations. She wanted to tell him she was scared.

  What if she trusted him, as Olivia had trusted R.J., trusted those around her, and something beautiful came to disaster?

  She sucked in a hard breath. Getting wound up was no good. Nate wasn’t pressuring her, but she was doing a good job pressuring herself.

  Nate looked back at her and smiled as he reeled in his line. Just a content aren’t-you-glad-we’re-here-together smile that wrapped around her like velvet and steel, uplifting and terrifying and comforting beyond anything she understood.

  Yes, she was glad, and the warmth of that happiness drove back her fears, the real and the neurotic, like sunlight chasing shadows. All that mattered in this moment was sharing that happiness with Nate.

  She rose and stepped across the cockpit to stand in front of Nate, knee to knee.

  He secured the hook and set the pole aside in its holder. Leaning back in his seat, he looked up, gray eyes gone dark with desire.

  As if they were starting some slow and easy dance at the dip and sway of the boat, she straddled his legs and settled into his lap, her knees on the bench cushion, and kissed his mouth.

  She shut her eyes. Brushing her lips over his mustache and beard, she explored his textures, grazing up to taste the soft skin of his cheek, the stubble along his jaw, and the sensitive place by his ear. She slipped her hands under his T-shirt, playing over the planes of his chest, losing herself in sensation, in just being, enjoying the coarse tickle of chest hair, his smooth warm skin, the quiver
s across his skin as she stroked his tight, sensitive nipples.

  He shifted and pulled off his shirt, dropping it aside on the bench. He settled his hands on her hips, encouraging her to ride against the heavy ridge of his erection.

  She brought her mouth back to tease his, licking lightly and flicking with her tongue

  Nate’s hands slipped to her thighs, clenched and flexed. Time slid away in the sweet dance of the kiss, the easy rocking rise and sway of the boat adding to the pleasure.

  Pleasure, oh, pleasure. He gave so much. Yes. Words were so hard, but she could show him her feelings.

  Kay rose from his lap, pressing her hand to his chest to make him stay. Dropping her folded beach towel onto the mahogany floor grate, she slipped to her knees between his legs. She tugged at the string of his swim trunks.

  Nate lifted his hips and let her pull the shorts down and off. With legs sprawled open and his erection standing proudly at attention, he settled back on the bench, arms draped lazily along the railing, his eyes gone dark and anything but lazy.

  She trailed her fingertips along the soft skin of his inner thigh, delicately scratching, enjoying his twitch and hiss. His eager shaft begged attention, but she teased, sliding her fingers into the dark blond curls at the base and around to cup and stroke him, enjoying the groans and sighs and his male impatience.

  She closed her hand around him, feeling him swell and leap within her grip, savoring the slide of soft skin over hard shaft. She closed her mouth over him. He tasted so right, like summer, salt and heat.

  He gripped the railing with both hands. “Oh, yeah, Kay.”

  Glancing up, she met his hungry stare brimming with a heady mix of tenderness, lust, and delight.

  She took him in deep and then a slow slide out, and again, and again, one hand tight around him, enjoying him tensing and rising for more and his sharp breaths. She loved how Nate loved this, loved how free he was with expressing his pleasure, his tumble of words, pleas and orders, as she teased him and pleased him, taking him long and slow, toying with him with her lips and tongue and teeth and hands, until his hands flew to her head, lacing tight in her hair.

  She wanted to laugh sheer delight at his losing himself in the pleasure, his hands hard on her without hurting, his breath and words short and guttural now as he strained, his hips jerking in the tense rhythm. She enjoyed this sensual power to draw him out and hold him back, until they both needed beyond bearing.