Revenge

by Lexi Blake

How could he talk to her in that chilly voice about calling her agent about a book she wasn’t sure she even wanted to write anymore? “I told you I wasn’t going to write the book.”

  “I think you should. You have to think about your own best interests now.”

  Because she wasn’t going to have him to look after her anymore? She needed to pull this back a bit. “Drew, I know you said you wanted one last night before you let me go. Don’t you think that’s a little dramatic?”

  “I think I told you what I wanted and I’m following through,” he replied, his eyes steady on her.

  “And if I want to stay?” Now that she was looking down the barrel of the gun he was about to fire, she knew all the logical reasons they couldn’t work didn’t matter. They should give it a shot.

  He turned away again. “You won’t be allowed to stay. I would greatly prefer not to have to drag you out, but I will if I have to. I made myself plain last night. This can’t work right now. You’re a distraction I don’t need.”

  Somehow those words cut deep. She’d thought he was doing this to protect her. All her insecurities began to bubble up. “So you expect me to go and sit in your approved-of home and wait for you?”

  His head shook briefly. “Not at all. I expect you to move on with your life. You can do better than me. This was a brief affair, Shelby.”

  “You’re going to tell me that what happened between us last night was nothing more than a bodily need?”

  He turned around. “Of course not. But it will be from here on out. I don’t know that I want to feel this way, Shelby. It hurts and I . . . I’m helpless against you, so this is the only way to handle the situation. I stayed up all night trying to figure out a way we could work this out, but it just won’t. I’ll be honest—when I really look at the situation, I don’t know that I want it to work. It makes me too vulnerable.”

  “Too vulnerable?”

  “Yes,” he replied, his voice perfectly academic as though he was talking about some piece of code that wasn’t functioning properly and needed to be rewritten. “It’s been a lovely few weeks, but I realized yesterday that the pain isn’t worth the pleasure. You’re a weakness and I can’t have any. Do you understand?”

  A weakness? She thought she’d been his strength. “Drew, if this is some whacked out plan to protect me, I don’t need protecting.”

  “I do. This isn’t about you. This is about me and this family. I can’t protect this family if I’m constantly worried about you. If I’m obsessed with you, I’m not serving them.”

  “It’s not one or the other. And I thought I was becoming part of this family.”

  “You thought wrong.” His face was a perfect blank and she wondered if this was how he fired employees. “You were a very pleasant means to an end and yes, I think it’s best for you to go as well. I’m not getting married and I’m almost certain to get bored with you at some point. Keeping you with me right now would ensure that you couldn’t do your job later on. I don’t want to do that to you. I don’t want to leave you without a means to support yourself. Unless . . . unless that was your plan. We could come to some sort of contract if that’s amenable to you. What is your career worth? This time around I would insist on writing sex into the contract though. I find myself deeply distracted by your body. I would want a guarantee.”

  Maybe he was saying all of this to manipulate her, but it worked. Her whole body went cold.

  He couldn’t care about her much if he could let her go like this. If he could look at her like she was some kind of prostitute after everything they’d been through together. The world wasn’t some dumb movie where an act of sacrifice could free them all. The trouble was if he’d asked her to stay and not turned it into some disgusting transaction, she would have. She would have given up her career and everything she’d worked for on nothing more than the promise that maybe he would change his mind about marrying her someday.

  She wasn’t this girl. She couldn’t allow herself to be this girl. She wasn’t the idiot who gave up everything in hopes that some man might someday say he loved her.

  Even if she loved him with all her heart.

  “I think you should let me get dressed.”

  He hesitated. “Shelby, I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean for things to turn out this way.”

  But he’d said what he wanted to say. If he didn’t leave, he would see her cry, and she didn’t want that. “It’s fine. Like you said, this was a brief affair. I wasn’t looking to get married. I’ll be ready to go in thirty minutes.”

  She held the sheet close to her. Last night she’d been so comfortable being naked around him, but this morning she was back to reality. He meant what he’d said. He’d wanted one last night of sex and then he was done.

  For whatever reason, he was pushing her away and he’d proven he would burn her if she didn’t comply.

  He stared at her and for a moment she thought he might say something else, but then he stood and nodded. “All right. I’ll give you some time to yourself. I’m sorry, Shelby. If I’d known . . . well, I would have spared you.”

  The door closed and she dissolved into tears.

  • • •

  Thirty minutes later, Shelby stepped outside the bedroom, dressed and made up and packed. Her armor was fully in place, and there would be no more tears. She’d cried them all out in the shower, careful to stay quiet. The last thing she needed was for Drew to know how much he’d hurt her. She still had her pride. It was all she had.

  She rolled her suitcase down the hall and toward her first caretaker. Case was standing there with his wife. There was a frown on his face as she walked up.

  “Are you sure this is what you want?” Case asked. “Because you don’t have to leave. Drew doesn’t make all the rules. No matter what he thinks.”

  The pretty blonde was makeup-free this morning. Despite the fact that she couldn’t have gotten much sleep, Mia was still vibrant and beautiful. “You can stay as long as you want. Drew can’t kick you out.”

  Oh, but he could and he had. He wasn’t here to witness her good-byes. She gave Mia what she hoped was a convincing smile. “It’s fine. We talked about it last night and realized we don’t work as a couple.”

  “He’s being ridiculous,” Mia argued. “He thinks he’s protecting you, but he needs you.”

  Drew Lawless didn’t need anyone. She was fairly certain of that. “It’s fine. I think it’s best this way.”

  “It’s not better for him,” Carly said, walking into the room. “And I don’t think it’s better for you, either. You’ve been happier the last few days than I’ve ever seen you, and Drew’s different, too. He’s more settled and open.”

  “I think he loves you,” Mia agreed.

  He’d never said the words and his actions spoke volumes. She had to go by his actions. “That’s sweet of you to say, but we’ve decided to be friends. And for a while we’re not going to have much contact at all. We started this thing on a lark and it’s time to end it. We don’t need the relationship as cover anymore.”

  Why was she having to explain this to them? Every second she had to stand there and act like the world wasn’t falling apart was pure torture.

  “You didn’t sleep with him for cover.” Carly put a hand on her shoulder. “I know you. If you slept with him, it was because you loved him.”

  She would never admit that to anyone. “Come and see me in Dallas. I’m staying there while I figure out my next move.”

  Carly looked unsure, but nodded. “All right. I’ll see you soon. Be careful.”

  “No worries.” She had to keep it together. “Apparently I’ve got some hot bodyguard waiting for me when I get there. It should be fun.”

  It was almost like Drew had given her a new life so he didn’t have to feel guilty about taking the old one from her. New city. New apartment. New man to live with.

 
It didn’t matter. All that mattered now was figuring out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. It was time to find herself again. The Shelby she’d been without Drew. Strong and confident.

  Alone and lonely. Like she’d been missing part of herself and it had fallen into place.

  Intelligent and independent.

  That Shelby. That Shelby would simply move on and find another man or be fine with no man at all. She could buy a vibrator, and that vibe wouldn’t rip her heart out.

  She gave Carly a wink and turned back to Case. “I hear there’s a helicopter waiting for me.”

  Mr. Lawless only sent the best for his castoffs.

  “If you’re sure, I’ll go fire it up. I’ll take your bag. The helipad’s where the tennis court used to be. I’ll be ready in a couple of minutes.” Case took her bag and started walking to the back of the house.

  She turned and gave Carly a hug, wondering how long she had with her friend. Carly was a Lawless now, and eventually they would drift apart because she would find herself spending more and more time with Mia and Ellie. They were a tight-knit clan, and family won out every time. In a couple of months, maybe a year, Shelby would find herself talking to Carly less and less, and they would move on, too.

  Nothing was permanent. She should have remembered that in the first place.

  She gave Mia a hug and Ellie appeared, rushing out to say good-bye to her.

  This could have been her family, too.

  She had to stop thinking that way. She forced herself to smile and hug and make promises about lunches and dinner dates that likely wouldn’t happen. When she got to Dallas, she was going to bury herself in work.

  She made her way to the back of the house, happy to have missed Drew. When she began to open the door that led outside, she heard a deep voice.

  “Don’t leave him. Please.”

  She turned, and Hatch was standing there in the same clothes he’d worn the night before and looking way worse for the wear.

  How dangerous was he? He didn’t look dangerous. He looked sad and tired. He looked like every year of his life hung heavily on his shoulders.

  “I should think you would want me gone.”

  Hatch shook his head. “Nah, you were doing your job. I always knew Drew might find out. I was in love with her. At least I thought I was. When I saw Noah and realized . . . well, I knew he wasn’t mine. I guess I got caught in her web, too. Over and over again. The fact that my mistake meant the end of Ben, well, I’ve dealt with that. It was easier when I thought she was dead, too.”

  She couldn’t help herself. She had to ask the question. “When did you know they’d used your money?”

  “Phillip came to see me the next day. Showed me the proof. Told me if I didn’t keep my mouth shut, he would send it to the police and make sure I was the only one who went down. At the time I was in mourning. I didn’t even think about the kids. I let them go. Please don’t do the same thing to Drew today.”

  She’d held her tongue with Drew’s siblings. She didn’t want to cause more problems in this family, but something about the way Hatch was challenging her made it impossible to stay quiet a moment longer. She wasn’t the bad guy here. “It’s not even similar, Mr. Hatchard. I’m not leaving Drew. He’s kicking me out. He says it’s for my own good, but I offered to stay with him.”

  “He’s sacrificing himself for you. It’s all he knows how to do. Shelby, he’s lived with the responsibility of his family for so long he doesn’t understand what it means to lean on someone, to be selfish. He thinks that if he loves you, he has to let you go.”

  “I told him he didn’t.” She wasn’t sure what Hatch wanted her to do. “Drew’s always honest with me. If he wants me to leave, it’s because he does.”

  “He’s not good at being honest with himself, and he doesn’t want you to leave. He’s dying inside and he’s going to die some more every day you’re gone. He finally found the one woman who could handle him. You can do this, Shelby. You can stand up to him. He’s fought for everyone. He needs one person to . . .”

  “That’s enough, Hatch.” Drew’s cold voice broke Hatch’s impassioned plea.

  She turned and Drew was standing in the hallway, his arms over his chest. He stared at Hatch with hard eyes.

  “You don’t have to do this, Drew,” Hatch said softly. “You don’t have to let her go.”

  Drew glanced down at his watch. “We have to be at the office in thirty minutes for a photo op. I suggest you stop worrying about my love life and get cleaned up so we can worry about our company. The stock is down two percent this morning, and it will drop again once my face shows up on People magazine next week.”

  “Damn it.” Hatch’s head hung as he started back toward the living room. “I’ll get legal on them.”

  “Don’t bother. They won’t be the only ones.” Drew turned back to her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for him to disturb you.”

  He was so beautiful. How did he manage to be both entirely manly and beautiful at the same time? She had to force herself to speak. “Drew, what would you say if I told you I want to stay here?”

  His lips curled up slightly. “I would say you’re a sweet girl, but I can’t allow it. I care about you. I want us to be friends somewhere down the line, but I have to choose my family. This is for the best.”

  She was on the outside, the girl looking in at the happy family, never a part of one. Not again.

  He held out a hand.

  No more kisses. No more plastering his body against hers like he couldn’t stand the thought of there being an inch of space between them. Just a friendly handshake to end the most intense relationship of her life.

  She turned away without another look. She couldn’t touch him again.

  The sound of the helicopter thudded through the air as Case turned on the rotors.

  She started for the door.

  A hand wrapped around her arm, pulling her back. Drew stood looking down at her, a frown on his face.

  “I meant what I said,” he shouted over the whine of the chopper. “I owe you. Keep the bodyguard close until we’re absolutely certain Iris won’t come after you. I don’t need to worry about your safety when I should be concentrating on what’s happening here.”

  Well, of course. She certainly wouldn’t want to keep him up at night. And yet she would do it because she would give him no cause to blame her. “Good-bye, Drew.”

  His hand didn’t let go. “Promise me if you need me, you’ll call.”

  “I’ll call,” she lied. She was never going to call him again.

  His hand let go and she was free.

  She strode to the helicopter, buckling herself in. As it took off, she looked down, and Drew was standing there with his hands in his pockets, looking very much the lost little boy he’d been once.

  Shelby watched him until he faded into the distance.

  • • •

  She was gone. Drew felt the absence like a hole in his fucking heart. Shelby was gone and she wasn’t going to call him. She was gone and there would be nothing he could do to get her back.

  It was all for the best.

  He stared out the limo windows as they rolled down the highway.

  “You should go after her,” Hatch said.

  Yeah, he was in the car with Hatch because Riley was running the game right now. He had to stop that, but he couldn’t work up the will. He should take over, but all he could think about was the fact that she was on a plane to Dallas. His plane. He’d called the night before when he couldn’t sleep and had it stocked with her favorite wine and tea so she could have a choice. He’d forced some poor guy to go out and find cave-aged Gruyère because she loved it with crackers.

  “Why would I go after her? I sent her away.” He wasn’t going to engage in this with Hatch. He didn’t get to play dad anymore. Hatch had killed
his real father.

  Or his idiocy had made it possible for his father to die. It didn’t matter in the end.

  “He made the right choice,” Riley said. His stalwart brother. Riley was always with him. “Shelby could get hurt if she stayed here.”

  “Ellie could get hurt, but I don’t see you sending her away,” Hatch pointed out.

  “That boat sailed long ago. Everyone knows how connected StratCast and 4L are, so Ellie keeping her distance would hurt us all. Ellie’s tough. She won’t back down from this fight. Not even if I asked her to.” Riley had been cool under pressure. He hadn’t blinked as they’d gone through the mob of reporters. “Very few people know about the connection between Drew and Shelby. She’s a reporter who does undercover work from time to time. She needs her anonymity.”

  Thank God for Riley. He was the only one who understood. The rest of his family looked at him like he’d kicked a puppy.

  Couldn’t any of them see how much this was killing him?

  “She wouldn’t have that if she’d stayed with you,” Hatch pointed out. “If she’d been with you for more than a few months, it would have been noted. It would have been reported on, and her undercover days would have been over. The same way they are for Mia. Shelby knew that. She would have found other work to do.”

  “She shouldn’t have to.” But she’d asked him to let her stay. She still could write her books. “No one should be put under this kind of scrutiny.”

  “You’ve got your father’s brain but none of his spirit,” Hatch complained. “Ben might have made mistakes, but he wouldn’t have let this happen. He wouldn’t have kicked out a woman who loved him.”

  He felt his blood pressure tick up. “My father loved a psychopath and when he decided to leave her, he got his girlfriend murdered along with himself. Don’t compare me to my father.”

  Hatch’s expression softened. “Drew, you can’t stay mad at him forever. I’m sorry for saying what I said. He had a brilliant mind, too, and it often left him wondering how to fit in with the people around him. The normal people. He could understand the most difficult of concepts, but I don’t think he understood what it meant to be loved. He accepted Iris because she told him she loved him. He stayed with her because it was easier than leaving. He didn’t get what love was until you kids came along.”