Again! Again!

by Zach Jenkins

  Levi stopped to finish his pop.

  “I don’t understand,” Inigo said, guessing that Levi was building up for a punchline. “Why’d they do that?”

  Levi didn’t get a chance to finish, though.

  Brick had shown up toward the end of the party. He just barely managed to catch his breath long enough to point at Levi and say, “This dope went into the wrong house. The fire was across the street. He’d burst into a bachelorette party and they were doing everything they could to get him out of his gear. I don’t think he got out of there until we’d put out the fire and he’d gotten one of their phone numbers.”

  Levi smiled sheepishly. “We did date for three months, though.”

  Inigo threw a wadded-up napkin at Levi. “You call that embarrassing?”

  Levi cocked his head. The room went quiet as if worried they’d overstepped some line.

  Before Inigo could tell them that he was just joking, Levi said, “No. I guess it isn’t. Hmm. How about this one? A little while back, I met this sexy guy in a hotel lobby. I’d never seen the guy before, but by the end of the night we’d done some of the—”

  “On that note,” Inigo quickly interrupted, “I think it’s time we all called it an evening.”

  “Hold on,” Maxwell said. “This sounds like a hot one. Who was he? What happened?”

  Clay and Ezra snickered. Brick whispered into Maxwell’s ear. His eyes shot wide open. “Ahh, yeah. This sounds like a perfect time for us to head home.” He looked back at Brick. “Don’t we have that thing we’re supposed to be doing later?”

  Brick pulled Maxwell to his feet. “You mean, not asking Levi to provide details of fucking Inigo? Yeah, I’m pretty sure that plan is still in full force. Come on. Let’s head home before you ask any other questions.”

  Inigo didn’t mind that the guys knew that he and Levi had already had sex, but it was definitely weird to talk about it. There was something different about a bunch of guys talking about things they’d done with people who are strangers to all the other friends. But as couples had formed amongst the friends, the details of their passionate nights had disappeared. He’d have to start keeping his lips locked a little tighter around his friends now that he and Levi were together.

  The room cleared out quickly after a round of hugs. Inigo was happy when Levi stayed.

  “Need any help?” Levi asked, moving the garbage can from the table back to its spot near the door. He stood in the doorway of the birthday party room, facing Inigo, and looking fantastically large, sexy, and oh so very present.

  “Nope. The other rooms are already cleaned up, and the food’s already been put away. I’ll finish up in here before opening up tomorrow. I’ll grab the garbage bag on the way out.”

  Inigo didn’t want the night to end, and he definitely didn’t want to spend the rest of it alone in the roller rink. What he needed was to stay as close to Levi as he could. He would have given anything to continue the partying they’d done in the hotel back at one of their houses.

  And since Levi couldn’t live more than a half hour away, there was no reason they couldn’t keep the fun going forever after that.

  Daring to dream that Levi might have some similar feelings, he asked, “Got any plans tonight?”

  Levi nodded, stabbing a tiny knife of disappointment into Inigo’s heart. He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. “I’ve got to get Dax home and ready for bed. We’ve got a playdate with the neighbors tomorrow morning.”

  Inigo scrunched up his nose. “That sounds horrible,” he said with a chuckle. “I mean, at least I get paid when kids run around and act crazy around me.”

  Levi scratched his cheek. “It’s not as bad as all that. The kids have fun and I get to ask the mom all kinds of questions about all the shit I don’t know, like signing him up for kindergarten next year and the doctor’s appointment he needs for that. There’s just so much to learn.”

  The conversation was taking an uncomfortable turn for Inigo. He liked kids well enough, but he didn’t know all that much about actually raising them. He wanted to spend more time with Levi, but not if it meant they were just going to sit on the couch watching that PAW Patrol show that all the little kids who came to skate seemed to like.

  It sounded like Levi was doing exactly what he needed to be doing for Daxter, but what Inigo wanted was more of the sexy fireman from the hotel. He couldn’t imagine how Levi could be both men.

  “Well, sounds like you’ve got plenty on your plate, Levi. Let me know when you’ve—”

  “Are you too busy to come over to my place and hang out?” Levi asked.

  Inigo didn’t reply right away. As much as he wanted Levi, he wasn’t ready to play daddy to a kid. That was too much responsibility to take on while he was struggling to keep his business alive. Especially since he might end up moving away in a few months. But Levi’s broad chest looked so inviting and comforting.

  Why can’t we just have the sex part of the relationship? Why does everything need to be so complicated?

  “Did I tell you that I’d just broken up when we met?” Inigo asked.

  Levi shook his head.

  “Yeah, one of the guys from my team. He dumped me as part of some power play or head game. He tried to get back together the other day, but I’m just not ready for that. I don’t need any games.”

  Inigo held up a hand to hold off any objections from Levi, but none came. Without more than a glance over his shoulder to make sure Daxter was still okay skating by himself, Levi just listened.

  “I’m not saying that’s what you have in mind. I’m just trying to explain where I’m at right now. No games, and nothing complicated. And Daxter, shit, that has to be complicated, right?”

  Levi nodded.

  “I’m just looking for fun right now,” Inigo finished.

  “Daxter is complicated. Fuck, I feel like I’m about to drown pretty much all day, every day. But that’s my situation, not yours. I need people like the neighbor next door to help me learn all the things about parenting that I don’t even know. I need people like Gary to remind me to slow down and smell the coffee. And I need you too, Inigo.”

  Levi’s voice was a quiet, sexy, grumbling thunderstorm of need that made Inigo want to give him whatever he wanted.

  “What do you need me for?” Inigo asked in a whisper.

  “I’ve got needs. Powerful, primal needs. I’ve never had so much fun shoving all my problems in a dark little box and ignoring them while fucking as I had with you. I need that distraction, that release. I want more. I won’t deny it. But if all you are able to give is to be my fuck buddy, I’ve got a spot ready for you in my bed.”

  Inigo cocked his head so he could look at Daxter. “What about him, though?”

  “Daxter goes to bed between eight and nine. Can you stay up later than that?”

  Levi’s brown eyes drilled into Inigo, weakening his resolve.

  When he nodded, Levi smiled and exhaled. “Thank God. I was afraid I’d gone too over the top and scared you away.”

  Inigo rolled his eyes. “You kidding? I almost came in my pants listening to that wild voice of yours. Shall we go?”

  “Dax!” Levi shouted, hurrying toward where his son was still skating. “Time to go home.” When Daxter started to complain, Levi promised him some cookies on the way if he behaved.

  Bribing the kid with treats to get him to stop throwing a tantrum didn’t sound like how the parenting books would recommend handling it, but it wasn’t Inigo’s place to offer any criticism.

  9

  Levi

  Levi went slower than normal to make sure he did not lose Inigo as they drove their separate cars to Levi’s house. As he drove through each intersection with a stop light, he checked the mirror to make sure that Inigo did not get stopped by a red light.

  “What time are we going swimming tomorrow?” Daxter asked from the back seat.

  Levi had completely forgotten that the kids were supposed to swim during the playdate at
the neighbor’s in the morning, and Daxter still needed a swimsuit. “Shit.”

  “Shit,” Daxter repeated with a giggle.

  “Hey, you can’t say that, Dax. That’s a…” Levi couldn’t really say it was a bad word, because he doubted it would be the last time it would slip out of his own mouth. “Umm, it’s a grownup word, okay? And you’re still a kid. So you can’t. Okay?”

  Levi met Daxter’s eyes in the rearview mirror to help solidify the lesson. Based on his serious expression and quick nod, Daxter understood. “Good. We’ll head over around ten and swim until lunch. And then we’ll come home after that. No tantrums this time, right?”

  The tantrums had been getting worse over the last couple of weeks. Levi was so exhausted by their frequency and intensity, he sometimes found himself doing whatever it took to make them go away and rationalizing it to himself by saying that all kids outgrow them eventually.

  He searched for Inigo’s car in the rearview mirror. He wanted to hurry straight home so he could be next to him again. But if he didn’t get the swimsuit on the way home, he’d just have to do it first thing in the morning. With a sigh, he decided that having Daxter walking around a little more might make him a little easier to put to sleep.

  “Hey, we’re going to need to stop on the way home and get you a suit. Please behave while we’re in there.”

  He turned into a Target parking lot and breathed a sigh of relief when Indigo followed.

  “Man, I haven’t been here in ages,” Inigo said as he got out of the car. “What are we getting? Beer? Pizza?”

  “Pizza!” Daxter screamed as he ran over to grab Inigo’s hand and pull him toward the store.

  “A swimsuit for Dax. He needs one for tomorrow morning.” Levi doubted he’d ever sounded so lame and old. He wouldn’t have been surprised if Inigo got back in his car and sped away. When Inigo stayed put, Levi couldn’t stop himself from doubling down with his lame talk. “Where do you shop?”

  “Meijer. It’s closer to my house and they’ve got better beer.”

  As they walked through the front door, Levi wasn’t sure whether to grab Inigo’s hand or not. He certainly wanted to, but hooking up with him in an out-of-town hotel, and being flirty in front of Levi’s other gay friends didn’t mean that Inigo was out in his day-to-day life. Inigo answered the unasked question by grabbing Levi’s hand and giving it a squeeze.

  Levi flailed for something to talk about. He wanted to talk flirty and dirty. It seemed like what they did best. But he couldn’t do too much of that in front of his son.

  Talking about raising Daxter would be pushing his luck. Inigo wouldn’t care that Daxter had managed to write his name and phone number the day before.

  In desperation, he asked the worst question of all. “How long were you with your ex?”

  “Not long. Too long. It’s really hard to tell with guys like him,” Inigo answered cryptically.

  Inigo’s body had tensed, and Levi’s mind screamed to change the subject, but his stupid mouth pressed on. “What do you think went wrong?”

  Daxter ran ahead to the Legos section.

  Inigo shrugged. “The first thing that went wrong was that I asked him out. He’s one of those passive-aggressive assholes who make you feel bad, and somehow manage to make it feel like they care for you while doing it.”

  Inigo stopped at the end of the aisle. Daxter was looking at the Lego sets down at the far end of the shelves. “Looking back on it, I have no idea what I was thinking. He was boring, petty, and jealous. And he wasn’t even that good of a lay.” Inigo bumped his hip against Levi’s, and dropped his voice to a whisper. “In the entire time we were together, he never figured out how to give as good of a blowjob as you did with just one night of practice.”

  Levi matched Inigo’s whisper. “I believe it.” He enjoyed sex, especially the part about making his partner happy. “And for the record, I’ve had more than one night of practice. But guys like your ex don’t take the time to appreciate all the important details, so how could they possibly be any good in bed? He probably couldn’t tell you which way your dick curved and by how much.”

  Inigo raised his eyebrows questioningly, clearly amused at the turn their conversation had taken.

  “To the left, and just the right amount,” Levi said, hoping not to blush.

  Inigo laughed. “Is that an official measurement?”

  This is certainly better than talking about exes or the difficulties of parenting.

  Their playful banter reminded Levi of how easily things had gone at the hotel. It really made him want to get the shopping over with and get back to his house as quickly as possible to see where things would lead once Daxter was asleep. He had worked so hard at parenting since meeting his boy. He deserved a few hours off.

  Well, as off as a parent can ever be, I suppose.

  “Absolutely,” he whispered. “It’s all very scientific.”

  He held out a finger, and crooked it into a slight curve. “Just like that.”

  “No way,” Inigo denied a little too loudly. He cleared his throat and whispered. “Is that bad?”

  “Bad? No way, man. Like I said. Just the right amount. Perfect. Beautiful.”

  Levi watched Inigo smile with pride. He bet the ex never made Inigo smile like that.

  “Do that finger trick to show me what your dick looks like,” Inigo said.

  Levi gave a quick glance over his shoulder to make sure Daxter was still ignoring them. When he held his hand up again, his finger curving up slightly, Inigo grabbed the finger and pulled it into his mouth and gave it a gentle suck. Levi was left frozen in place when Inigo pulled his lips away.

  “So, I forgot, what are we here to get?” Inigo asked.

  “I don’t know…” Levi said in a daze. He shook his head to clear the cobwebs. “I mean, a swimsuit for Dax. I need to find one fast.”

  “They sell a lot of those in the toy section?”

  Levi looked around.

  How’d we get so far from where we were going?

  “Come on, Dax. Let’s get your suit and head home. It’s about bedtime.”

  “No.” Dax stomped his foot, and crossed his arms.

  Shit.

  “Whoa,” Inigo said, patting Levi on the back. “My dad would’ve dragged me right over to kitchen supplies, and beat me with a wooden spoon. Are spoons still a thing?”

  While looking at his son, Levi shook his head. “I don’t think so. And thank God for that.” With a stern voice that didn’t match his words, he said, “Dax, come on. Cut me some slack. You’re the one who wants to go swimming tomorrow.”

  Daxter collapsed into a screaming puddle of kid when Levi reached out to grab his arm.

  Inigo covered his face to hide a smile. “Why don’t I leave you two alone for a couple minutes? It might make it easier for him to calm down if I’m not here. Come find me over by the books when you’re ready to check out.”

  Without waiting for a reply, Inigo left.

  Levi knew he should be happy that Inigo wasn’t trying to interfere, but instead he felt all alone with the stress of raising Daxter. But his son wasn’t Inigo’s problem. If things didn’t work out with Inigo, it would be better if he wasn’t reliant upon his help anyway.

  Frustrated with the way the night was threatening to fall apart, Levi gently pinned Daxter’s arms against his sides to get his attention. In as adult of a voice as possible, he said, “What’s going on here? Why are you yelling at me? You want to go swimming tomorrow, right?”

  Daxter nodded and wiped his nose against his own shoulder.

  Kids are so gross.

  But Levi wasn’t about to start a whole new tantrum about proper booger care.

  “Okay,” Levi continued. “So let’s go get the swimsuit and get you home so you’re not too tired to swim tomorrow.”

  Daxter nodded again and wiped his nose on his other shoulder. As disgusting as he was being, at least the crying was stopping.

  Maybe I’m starting t
o get the hang of this parenting stuff.

  “Okay. Let’s get an Icee, too,” Daxter said as he marched off toward the clothing department without waiting for a reply.

  Levi, unsure of how long until Daxter’s next tantrum, groaned, but decided that a little treat would be fine as long as it got them home quicker. “Fine.”

  Daxter’s mood greatly improved with the promise of sugar. He quickly picked out a swimsuit without any complaints. Levi would’ve preferred to save a couple dollars by buying one that didn’t have a picture of Spider-Man, but he wasn’t willing to risk another meltdown.

  Daxter skipped through the store as they made their way to the magazines where Inigo was waiting for them.

  “Ready to go?” Levi asked.

  “How’d you get him to settle down so quickly?” Inigo asked.

  “Who knows? Maybe I’m getting good at being a dad. Let’s hurry up and pay so we can get out of here, though.”

  Daxter tugged Levi’s pants and said, “And the Icee. You promised.”

  Levi patted Daxter’s head. “I didn’t forget. We’ll get it after we pay for the swimsuit.”

  Inigo squinted at Levi. “Are you sure bribing him is a smart thing to do?”

  The criticism hurt. “I don’t do it all the time,” Levi said. The lie hurt worse than getting caught doing the bribing. “Besides, I thought you were in a hurry to get back to my place, too.”

  “Oh, I am, but I just think…” Inigo raised his hands to surrender. “You’re right. What do I know? Hey, before we go, you should check this out.” Inigo led Levi around to the next aisle, and pointed at a section of the books. “Have you read any of these parenting books? I bet they have some useful tips.”

  Levi didn’t answer right away.

  Inigo had overstepped a line, and instead of helping Levi, was implying that he didn’t know what he was doing. Most of the time, Levi would have said the same, but it was different coming from someone who wasn’t there day in and day out.

  Parenting is harder than he can imagine.