The Plotters

by Un-su Kim

  ‘Must’ve been something I ate. How embarrassing, getting the runs right after meeting someone for the first time!’ Reseng babbled as he rubbed his stomach.

  Misa covered her mouth, laughing. He couldn’t help thinking that her smile lit up the room.

  ‘The coffee got cold. It tastes better when it’s hot,’ she said.

  ‘That’s okay. I’ve always been a lukewarm sort of guy anyway.’

  Reseng took a sip. It was good, rich with a bold flavour and aroma.

  ‘It’s delicious! Kenyan?’

  ‘Ethiopian.’

  ‘Ah, you’re supposed to be able to guess the beans’ country of origin from the taste alone, but I’m still not hip enough.’

  Misa laughed again.

  ‘You laugh no matter what I say.’ Reseng’s face turned serious. ‘Am I that ridiculous?’

  Misa looked flustered. ‘Oh, no! I’ve always laughed easily. You’re not ridiculous or anything. I just like to laugh.’

  ‘Actually, I am kind of ridiculous. Everyone says so.’

  Misa stared at him for a long moment until he finally asked, ‘What is it?’

  ‘What do you like about my sister?’ Her expression was serious now.

  Reseng stared up at the ceiling. What did he like about her? What on earth was he supposed to say?

  ‘Hmm, well, first of all, Mito is pretty and smart. And she knows everything about me. She knows me so well, it’s almost shocking. And she always tells me what to do, even when I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing.’

  Misa looked satisfied with his answer.

  Just then someone burst into the shop, calling out in a loud, giddy voice. ‘Oh, darling Miiisa! I finally finished that oversized jumper!’

  Reseng looked up and stared in surprise. Waltzing into the shop was none other than the cross-eyed librarian. She froze and stared right back at him.

  ‘This is Reseng!’ Misa was like a little kid eager to show off her new prize. ‘Mito’s boyfriend! She wasn’t making it up this time!’

  The librarian nodded almost imperceptibly in response. Reseng slowly stood and glared at the librarian. Her eyes filled with fear and she looked away. The door opened again and this time it was Mito. She quickly took in the librarian frozen on the spot, Misa smiling brightly and Reseng standing between them with a deadly serious expression. She seemed taken aback but not the least bit scared.

  ‘Reseng! Nice to see that cute arse of yours is still in one piece,’ she said with a grin.

  He stared at her, flabbergasted. ‘You. Crazy. Bitch.’

  The words sprang out of his mouth of their own accord. Misa gasped.

  For a moment, they all just stood there. No one spoke, no one moved. He couldn’t piece it together. Plotter, librarian, knitting-shop owner—what on earth were these three mismatched women doing together? And in this ridiculous shop, of all places, watched over by Papa Smurf and Winnie-the-Pooh and all the Teletubbies? He felt like a ball of wool that had been slowly unravelling, only to suddenly tighten into a tangled knot. The librarian let out a tense sigh. Reseng couldn’t get over it. As surprised as he was by Mito, he could not grasp why the cross-eyed woman, the same docile librarian who’d been cooped up in The Doghouse all that time, was here. Had she gone over to Mito, or to Hanja? No, that wasn’t it. Now that he thought about it, the librarian had been knitting up a storm ever since she first came to the library five years ago. That meant she’d been in cahoots with Mito from the start.

  Mito was the first to speak. ‘Let’s talk somewhere else.’ It was a voice to soothe an angry child.

  ‘I prefer it in here. Misa and I were in the middle of a conversation, it’s a pretty shop and, you know, there’s just something special about this place.’ Reseng mimicked knitting with his fingers and looked up in the direction of the attic room.

  ‘Besides,’ he added, smiling at Misa, ‘our sweet Misa went to all this trouble to serve coffee and fruit. It’d be a shame to leave now.’

  Misa gave him an anxious, confused look as she chewed on her bottom lip. The librarian kept looking fearfully back and forth between him and Mito.

  ‘That’s right,’ Misa said, making an effort to keep her voice light. ‘I don’t know what’s going on, but you two should stay and work it out over a cup of coffee.’

  Mito slowly walked over to the table as if she had no choice. The librarian stayed where she was but kept a careful eye on Mito, who pulled her over by the arm.

  ‘Misa, would you mind making us some coffee too?’ Mito asked with a smile.

  As soon as Misa went to the kitchenette to make more coffee, Mito leaned in close to Reseng and hissed, ‘My sister is not a part of this. Let’s go somewhere else.’

  ‘We’re all a part of this.’ Reseng said, his eyes locked on the librarian’s. ‘Because we’re all connected by the most amazing coincidences.’

  The librarian turned to avoid his gaze. Mito pushed her face right up to Reseng’s ear. ‘Mess with my sister and you’re dead.’

  Reseng glared back at Mito’s face, which was far too close to his own, then leaned back, his nose in the air. ‘Oh-ho, aren’t you scary! I thought you two were like those singing, dancing Silver Bell Sisters, but it turns out you’re just a couple of goons. Guess I should call you the Silver Bell Goon Squad instead?’

  Reseng stared at the two of them. Misa paused in the middle of taking a coffee cup from the cupboard and turned to call out, ‘Sis, you didn’t eat breakfast! Would you like some toast?’

  ‘No, we’re leaving now.’

  ‘I’ll have some!’ Reseng said cheerfully. ‘Some delicious toast made by Miss Misa!’

  Mito looked daggers at him. The librarian sent her some sort of signal, and Mito winked back, as if telling her not to worry. After a moment, Misa returned to the table, carrying a tray with toast and two cups of coffee in one hand and steering her wheelchair with the other.

  ‘Reseng, you work at a library, right? Sumin works at a library too,’ Misa said, trying valiantly to break the tension.

  ‘Yes, I know. Sumin.’ Reseng kept his eyes on the librarian as he spoke. ‘We used to work at the same library, in fact. Back then, our jobs were different, but now it seems Sumin and I are doing the same thing. It’s nice to see her here. There’s always so much to talk about when you meet someone in the same line of work as you.’

  The librarian looked sheepishly at Misa and nodded. Reseng picked up the toast and took a huge bite.

  ‘Wow, now that is delicious! If I’m in the area again, can I come back for more toast?’

  ‘Of course!’ Misa said with a smile. ‘Drop by any time.’

  Mito glared at him. An awkward silence descended over the table. Misa kept glancing around at the others. She looked like she wanted to change the subject but couldn’t think of what to say. The librarian was no less tense than when she’d first arrived. Mito drummed her fingers on the table across from Reseng. After a moment, she spoke.

  ‘Whenever two people date, misunderstandings are bound to occur. The man does something, thinking it’s no big deal, but it hurts the woman’s feelings. Or a single careless word from the woman hurts the man’s pride. That message I sent you wasn’t because I wanted to end it for good. I just meant that we should take a break and think things over, decide what we want in the future. But I guess you couldn’t wait and decided to come running back? And to my little sister’s shop, of all places? Aren’t you embarrassed?’

  Reseng stared at her. What the hell was she talking about?

  ‘What? You dumped him? Of all things!’ Misa looked at Reseng in shock.

  Reseng shook his head. Mito continued.

  ‘But since you came all this way, let’s go get a drink. If there’s been a misunderstanding, we’ll thrash it out. And if there are things you need to get off your chest, I’ll listen. Or if there are things you’ve been wanting to ask me, you can ask.’

  ‘Misunderstanding?’ Reseng glowered at her.

  ‘She�
��s right, Reseng.’ Misa squeezed his arm. ‘Have a drink with her and let all your feelings out.’

  Mito stood and grabbed her bag. The librarian stood too.

  ‘Stay here,’ Mito said. ‘Why interfere in someone else’s relationship?’

  ‘Yes, Sumin! Stay and make Pikachu dolls with me.’ For some reason, Misa sounded extra excited about that idea. The librarian sat back down hesitantly.

  ‘Shall we?’ Mito said to Reseng.

  Reseng crossed his arms, tipped his head back, then let out a deep sigh and stood up. The librarian sat hunched over, her eyes fixed on the floor. He stared at her for a moment before turning to Misa and smiling.

  ‘Thank you so much for the delicious coffee and delicious toast. Oh, and the fruit, too.’

  ‘Come by again, Reseng.’

  ‘I definitely will. Besides, I have to talk to Sumin, too.’

  Misa smiled brightly at him.

  Mito took Reseng to a place in the market that served blood-sausage-and-rice soup. Mito seemed to be a regular. The owner greeted her by name as she came in. Mito headed for a corner table and called out her order.

  ‘Auntie, could we get two orders of spicy stir-fried tripe with a side of liver and blood sausage, and two bottles of soju?’

  The owner brought over the two bottles of soju, two beer glasses and a small bowl of sliced onions and peppers marinated in soy sauce.

  ‘Drinking in the middle of the day?’ she asked.

  ‘This guy says he’s in love with me and won’t leave me alone,’ Mito said, feigning arrogance. ‘So I decided to throw him a bone and let him have a drink with me just this once.’

  The owner gave Reseng the once-over.

  ‘A handsome boy like this begging for a date? Better watch yourself, girl. Don’t come sobbing to me like you did last time.’

  When she returned to the kitchen, Mito filled her beer glass two-thirds full of soju and knocked it back. She picked up a slice of onion and chewed on it noisily.

  ‘Acting tough for my benefit?’ Reseng asked.

  ‘I always drink fast. I don’t live a life of leisure like you. I have to work, and study, and love, and because life is sad, I have to drink. But I don’t have all the time in the world to get drunk.’

  ‘You must be busy. Because on top of all that, you’ve got people to kill.’

  Mito snickered.

  ‘Let’s get to the point,’ he said. ‘Why’d you put a bomb in my toilet? That’s the part I don’t understand.’

  ‘To tell you to think about your life. You don’t seem to give a shit.’

  Mito sounded flippant. She chomped on another slice of onion, then poured half a glass of soju for them both.

  ‘Are you trying to get revenge for your dead parents?’ Reseng asked. ‘Are you so full of hatred that you’re going on a killing spree and taking out anyone who has anything to do with plotting?’

  Mito stared at him speechlessly for a moment then burst into laughter. ‘See, what’d I tell you? You don’t think. Pull that pea-sized brain out of your arse for once and think outside the box. Look at the big picture. Like world peace, or the future of humanity.’

  Reseng wondered what made her so cocksure. She’d been caught in the act of plotting by one of her targets. And by a trained assassin, no less. She was small, maybe 160 centimetres tall, and couldn’t have weighed more than fifty kilograms—clearly no match for him. She could be dead any time between leaving this restaurant and returning home. But she looked perfectly calm. And not fake-calm either. Where did this unfounded confidence come from?

  ‘It seems to me you should be feeling pretty nervous right about now,’ he said.

  ‘Why, are you going to pull a knife on me?’ Mito snickered again. Laughing every time someone spoke seemed to be a genetic trait shared by the sisters.

  ‘And if I do?’

  ‘You’re not the type to stab a woman to death.’

  ‘You think you know everything about me because you taped a few photos to your wall?’

  ‘That woman Chu let live. That pretty, pathetic woman who weighed no more than thirty-eight kilos. We gave you crystal-clear instructions to break her neck, but instead you gave her pills. I’ll never understand why assassins think they’re smarter than plotters. If a forensic scientist specifically tells you not to give someone pills but to break their neck instead, then you can bet they’ve got a damn good reason.’

  ‘How did you know?’

  ‘I’m the one who put that bottle of barbiturates in your briefcase. It came back empty.’

  ‘Then why put it there in the first place if I wasn’t supposed to use it?’ he said, his face changing colour.

  Mito looked him in the eye as she said, ‘I wanted to see what choice you’d make.’

  She took a sip of soju. Her hands looked rough and calloused; Jeongan must have been right about all the work she did in the marketplace. Reseng picked up his glass and drained it in one swig. Mito gave a faint smile.

  ‘I guess you’re not going to kill me today. You never drink on assassination days.’

  ‘You’re my plotter?’

  ‘No, Dr Kang was your plotter. I was his assistant.’

  ‘I thought Dr Kang was Hanja’s plotter.’

  ‘Ultimately there’s no difference between Hanja and Old Raccoon. They look like they’re at each other’s throats, but the truth is they need each other. They’re like the crocodile and the crocodile bird. If one of them gets a big kill, the other picks over the bones. But once this election is over, Hanja is going to take out Old Raccoon. Then he’ll kill you as well.’

  The owner came out of the kitchen with a platter of tripe. This time she inspected Reseng at length.

  ‘Wow, you are one handsome, sturdy-looking fellow! Eat up!’ She set a bottle of lemonade on the table. ‘On the house,’ she said. ‘Our Mito might act like a donkey on heat, but once you get to know her, she’s a good girl with a lot of heart. She’s suffered a lot at a young age. So take good care of her.’

  Reseng nodded bashfully.

  ‘Auntie,’ Mito grumbled, ‘I told you, he’s the one chasing after me.’

  ‘Who the hell would want to chase after your crazy arse?’ The woman gave Mito a rap on the head with her knuckles. She bowed at Reseng, who found himself automatically rising from his chair to bow back. As the woman turned to leave, Mito picked up a large piece of tripe with her chopsticks and shoved the whole thing in her mouth.

  ‘Taste it. It’s delicious. Don’t let her mouth fool you—she’s a great cook.’

  Mito pushed the platter closer to him. The food looked like someone had sliced up a rubber hose and slapped on some hot pepper paste. That unmistakable tripe smell wafted up from the platter. He frowned, while Mito’s chopsticks never stopped moving.

  ‘Every time I eat tripe here,’ she gushed, ‘I can’t help picturing God’s intestines. The intestines of a God that human beings have never seen and can’t imagine. The dirty, smelly and disgusting things hidden inside the holy, sacred and divine. Shame hiding behind grace. Ugliness hidden behind beauty. The complex web of lies lurking behind what we think is truth. And yet human beings try to deny that every living thing has to have intestines.’

  ‘Snap out of it,’ Reseng said. ‘It’s just pig guts.’

  ‘The closest thing to human organs are pig organs, and since the Bible says humans were made in God’s image, then these intestines must resemble God’s intestines.’

  Mito blew on a piece of God’s intestines to cool it off before putting it in her mouth.

  ‘Did you kill Dr Kang?’

  ‘Maybe,’ Mito said flatly.

  ‘By yourself?’

  ‘How many people does it take to get rid of one fat guy? It’s not hard.’

  Mito swallowed the bite of tripe she’d been chewing on and took a sip of soju.

  ‘You’re stronger than you look. He weighed over a hundred kilograms.’

  ‘Cranes were invented five thousand years ago. T
he wheel was invented six thousand years ago.’

  Reseng lit a cigarette.

  ‘You planted a mole, Sumin, in Old Raccoon’s library, killed Hanja’s plotter, Dr Kang, and made it look like suicide, stuck a bomb inside my toilet…’ Reseng mumbled to himself, then added, ‘What the fuck were you thinking? Are you declaring war on all the contractors?’

  ‘Maybe I am,’ Mito said innocently, as if she were talking about someone else.

  ‘War on Hanja? Or on Old Raccoon?’

  ‘Both.’

  Reseng stared at her, incredulous. She still had the same innocent look on her face. He smiled stiffly.

  ‘A girl like you going to war with those monsters? You’ve got to be kidding.’

  Mito put down her chopsticks and wiped her mouth with a napkin.

  ‘What do you mean by “a girl like me”, and what is so funny about it?’ She glared at him.

  ‘Hanja and Old Raccoon aren’t going to fall for your tricks like Dr Kang did. They won’t let you toss them off a roof. You seem to think you know this business just because you helped out a plotter a few times. But you are no match for someone like Hanja. You’ll be cremated before you even begin. Stop before this goes any further. In fact, if you stop now, I’ll keep my mouth shut about these little games of yours—for nice, sweet Misa’s sake. As a bonus, I’ll forgive you for the bomb in my toilet.’

  ‘It’s too late. And I know Hanja and Old Raccoon just as well as you do.’

  Reseng took a drag and exhaled slowly.

  ‘Do you know how long it took me to find you? Less than a week. Hanja will find you much faster. Then you’ll have every single creep from the meat market coming after you with their knives out. Obviously Misa’s knitting shop won’t be safe. So I’m warning you. Those guys won’t be as nice as me.’

  ‘You didn’t find me. I summoned you.’

  Reseng raised his eyebrows and stared at her. She stared straight back at him. She looked serious and determined. Reseng stubbed out his cigarette, filled his glass a third full of soju and swigged it. The soju was hot and bitter in his empty stomach. He grimaced, and Mito tapped the plate of tripe with her forefinger. He stared at her for a second before taking a bite. He’d never tried tripe before. Just as she’d said, it tasted much better than it looked. He took another sip of soju.