by Royal Blue
“Man, I’m sorry I missed the recital. Heard he did his thing. How’s the little guy holding up?” Ray’s demeanor shifts to one of a big uncle.
My nephew has been lucky there. I have a great circle of friends that would give the shirts off their backs for me and my nephew.
“He’s hanging in there.” I look down at the bottle in my hand. “He misses his mother. I’m doing everything I can to be there for him.”
“Is that you, Tyson?” I hear come from behind me in a singsongy voice.
My lips tug up in the corners. Not all of my friends are living a secret life. Darwin is as flamboyant as they come. He lives his life without a care and loves hard if he likes you. He has become sort of a mother hen with me. Just hearing his voice picks up my spirit.
“Damn, who is that with Darwin? He’s fine as fuck,” Ray murmurs, shifting my attention.
When I look to find the source of his comment, the smile falls off my face. I freeze in horror when I see the man walking beside Darwin. It isn’t his gorgeous face that has my heart pounding so hard I feel it in my throat.
I can’t lose my nephew. If this man runs and spills that I was here, I could have the fight of my life on my hands. I know Javier trusts everyone that comes to these parties—whether straight or gay—but I can’t bank on that trust when my nephew is involved.
My mind races. People see things differently when children are involved. The bullshit I’ve heard people say. I get pissed just thinking about it.
With a scowl on my face, I hand Ray my beer. Grabbing Mr. Connor’s arm, I tug him from the poolside back into the house. He doesn’t protest as I step into one of the guest rooms, slamming the door behind me.
His blue-gray eyes are wide, his full lips partially open. I watch the heaving of his chest. It’s clear the lack of protest comes from shock.
The blood drains from his face. His lips flap as his eyes bounce across my face. He almost looks lost.
Several emotions race across his features—fear, confusion, and uncertainty. His pretty ass blinks up at me a few times, as I tower over him. Seeming to snap out of it, he tugs his arm out of my hold.
“Listen, I haven’t disclosed that I’m gay to the school. I love my job, and I’d never do anything wrong to the children. Being gay doesn’t make me a pervert. Whatever you’re thinking, please don’t put my career at risk because of your bias,” Mr. Connor says through tight lips.
My brows draw in, my mind moving a mile a minute. I think back to looks he gave in that classroom and the night of the play. I notice the buzz still running through my hand from dragging him into this room.
I don’t think. Rather, I move on instinct. I step into his space, tugging him forward by the back of his neck, and crush my lips to his. I should be ready for the instant sparks that fly, but I’m still stunned by them. I’m even more stunned when he curls his fingers into my T-shirt, pulling me to him.
Andy
ALL I could see when Kyle turned in my direction was my career ending. Rage radiated from his eyes; his jaw was clinched tight. I was sure he planned to tell the school board that he found me at a barbecue full of gay men. It never once dawned on me that he, too, happened to be at the same barbecue.
My brain short-circuits from the moment he tugs me into his kiss. His mouth is searing me with his heat. His soft but firm lips have melded to mine. I’m putty in his hands. A groan slips free from my throat, when his teeth nip at my bottom lip, coaxing me open to him. The moment his tongue slips into my mouth, a flavorful burst of beer and mint nearly buckles my knees.
His fingers move into my hair, drawing me nearer. I’m too shocked to move my hands even an inch from the lock they have on his T-shirt. Kyle deepens the kiss just as a knock sounds on the door.
“Andy? Kyle? Is everything okay?” Darwin’s concerned voice comes through the door.
Reluctantly, I pull away, clearing my throat. I reach to touch my now swollen lips. Kyle looks down at me with such intensity. I can see the rise and fall of his harsh breathing. I look away, feeling my shy side rear its head.
“Yes, Dar, we’re fine. Just give us a minute to clear something up,” I call out.
“O-k-kay,” Darwin drags out in his singsongy way.
I roll my eyes. There’s sure to be an interrogation later. When Darwin went on and on about his friend who just broke up with someone not too long ago and wanting to set us up, I had no idea he was talking about Kyle Tyson. It hits me like a ton of bricks now, as all of the pieces fall into place. He brought me here to meet Mason’s uncle.
Kyle places his fingers under my chin, turning my face toward him. I lift my eyes to his, searching for what he must be thinking. I’m met with unrestrained passion.
His tongue darts out as if his searching for my taste on his lips. He swallows hard, causing a shiver to run through me. I can only imagine the thoughts behind the hunger in that gesture. The heat coming from his eyes mirrors the desire warring inside of me. I’m still trying to catch my breath and wrap my head around all of this.
“We need to talk,” he says.
“Yes, I think we do.”
His eyes follow my tongue. It seems like he plans on kissing me again, but he just pulls me in close. I look up at him expectantly.
“This is not a talk we can rush through here,” he says as he searches my face.
I nod. “That’s for sure,” I breathe. I shift nervously. “Do you have time to sit down or something? I know camp has started.”
His lips turn up and his eyes light. The smile on his face warms me from within. I actually excited about the upcoming season. I’m a fan and I follow his team.
“I’ll be free at the end of the week. We can have dinner then. Will that work for you?”
“Yes,” I say much too quickly.
I want to groan at my own eagerness. Kyle’s smile broadens, showing his teeth. It’s a breathtaking smile, one that beckons you closer. It has me under its spell.
“We can get together then to have this talk in detail,” he murmurs before dipping his head and capturing my lips.
I mean, he doesn’t just kiss; he consumes me. Kyle takes and gives at the same time. It’s the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. He’s completely frying every brain cell I have.
I’ve officially forgotten my name. If I were asked, I would say Kyle Tyson. At the moment, he is the only thing I know.
CHAPTER FIVE: NON-KYLE
Kyle
THE BARBECUE is in full swing, but I’m glued to the same spot with the only view I want for the rest of the night. The little group standing about three feet away from me is where my focus lies. The pool lights have come on, providing somewhat of a spotlight on the center of my attention. Standing off to the side by myself, I probably look crazy to everyone else.
I’m banking on the fact that most don’t know how to approach me after all I’ve been through. I’m not in the mood to talk about my feelings. Honestly, I’ve switched into research mode. I want to see how this Andy dude moves.
“So you live in the city?” someone asks Andy in the small group he’s standing in.
“Yeah, it’s an easy commute to work, and I love my apartment.” Andy’s reply floats to my ears.
“I used to live in SoHo before I moved out to Jersey,” the other guy says.
“I love that new Thai fusion place down in SoHo,” Darwin adds.
“I have to try that place out. I love Thai food,” I hear Andy reply.
I note that fact for later. I’ve been earhustling for a half hour at this point. I have no shame; it is what it is. I’m learning details about my nephew’s kindergarten teacher. I’ve always found Mr. Connor attractive, but I’m seeing him more closely now.
“I don’t mean to pry, but that’s a nice neighborhood on a teacher’s salary,” someone in the group says.
I frown. That is very personal. The protective part of me wants to tell them to mind their fucking business. The side of me that wants to learn more lean
s in to listen closely.
Andy gives a small laugh. “I actually work at an upscale private school. I’m doing pretty well. Although, I work there by choice—”
“And that was too much of an explanation,” Darwin cuts him off. “Learn some tact, honey, will you?”
I chuckle to myself. You have to love Darwin. He said exactly what I was thinking.
“You guys have some great bars and lounges,” the guy from Jersey notes.
“Yeah, I don’t go out to those much. Unless my sister drags me.” Andy chuckles softly.
I love that quietness. I bite my lip as my mind goes back to that last kiss I took before walking out of that guest room earlier. I wanted to leave him with something to think about. It’s going to be a long weekend now that all I have on my mind is our date.
“What has that look on your face?” Beau asks as he walks up with two beers.
“Nothing,” I reply, taking the offering he holds out.
Beau’s the one person here that knows me enough not to care how standoffish my body language might be. I don’t mind. Beau and I understand each other. He’s the brother I wished all my life for, right up until the moment I got him, and I wouldn’t trade him for another.
“I’ve seen nothing, and that ain’t it. You were coming out of the house with that guy when I arrived. By the way you’ve been watching him—not that I blame you, might I add—I’d say nothing is a whole lot of something, all right,” he says, nodding in Andy’s direction.
“Yeah, I know him,” I reply nonchalantly.
“From…?” Beau draws out with a questioning gaze. “Better yet, are you sure you’re ready?”
I blank-stare back at him. Beau has known me long enough to know I’m not going to open up here around all of these people—if I were going to open up at all. Which is still highly unlikely to happen.
“Fine,” he murmurs, before taking a pull of his beer. His twang comes through as he speaks.
“Country ass,” I tease.
“Some things ain’t never gonna change. What’s your point?” he tosses back.
“Don’t have one. You stopped asking me questions, though. Didn’t you?”
Beau grins around his beer. We both fall into our usual comfortable silence. It’s exactly what I need at the moment. Time with my thoughts and enough quiet to overhear Andy’s conversation.
It might seem a little stalkerish, but it’s my way of learning the details I need to know. Details give insight, and insight always gives you a hand in the choices you make. Choices are important, and to make the right ones you need every crumb that falls into your lap.
“Mm, you’re about to do something non-Kyle. Be careful,” Beau says and walks away.
Something non-Kyle. That entire scene back in that room was not me at all. I think it’s time I do exactly that. Something non-Kyle it is.
CHAPTER SIX: NERVOUS
Andy
I DROP my brush in the bathroom sink and curse. I’ve been jumpy all day. I came out of my skin every time someone stepped into my classroom unscheduled.
It seemed like I had more visitors today than ever. Like the Universe was out to expose me. I can’t begin to number how many times I thought my secret would explode before me at any moment.
I’ve been waiting for someone to jump out and say I’m on some type of reality prank show. It’s been over a week since the barbecue, and I still can’t convince my mind that Kyle asked me out on a date. I’m not sure where this all is going to go. I think that’s what has me spinning in circles.
Or it could be that kiss he laid on my lips before leaving me in that guest room to fall into a puddle of goo. I haven’t been able to function without thinking about it since. I just want to shout it out to someone. I kissed Kyle Tyson, and I have a date with him tonight. However, there’s the mental slap and stern voice that keeps telling me to get a grip.
Startled, I look down as my phone rings. I roll my lips and send it to voicemail. It’s my sister, Tara.
“Not now,” I mutter.
I’m avoiding her. She knows me best. She sees everything, even the things I choose not to tell her. If she were to hear the nerves in my voice, she’d be relentless. I’m not ready to share what I hope is the beginning of a relationship.
“Get it together,” I grumble into the mirror.
Plucking the brush from the sink, I place it aside and roll my shoulders back. I run a shaky hand through my locks. When I pull my hand from my hair, I stare at the tremble in it. I’m always nervous before a date, but not this nervous. I swallow hard, lifting my eyes to look at the mirror again.
The doorbell rings and I jump as a yelp bursts from my lips. “Jeez!”
I blow out a breath and roll my eyes at myself. Smoothing down the front of my shirt, I take one last look at my outfit. A blue button-down, khakis, and a pair of brown loafers are what I settled on. I’m not sure where we’re going, so I went with the safest thing I could think of.
I shake off the nerves, turning to leave the bathroom. I take deliberately slow steps to the front door. I don’t want to seem anxious, although I’m sure he’ll smell the anxiety on me as soon as I open the door. I check my armpits to make sure I haven’t sweat right through my shirt.
Phew, you’re fine.
I let that thought pass, rolling my neck on my shoulders. Stopping at the single barrier between me and this date, I take one last deep cleansing inhale. Releasing the breath, I reach to unlock and open the door. I tip my head back to look up into those dark eyes. A small smile plays at the corners of Kyle’s lips.
He makes everything he wears look picture-perfect. He is groomed to perfection. His barber takes love and care to have him camera ready even on his off days. The way his skin is glowing makes me envy his flawless complexion. Kyle is a work of art. One that has my breath whooshing from my lips.
“I brought dinner,” he says, holding up a bag before me. “Do you plan to let me in?”
Disappointment hits me almost as hard as the delicious aromas. I should have known someone like Kyle wouldn’t want to parade around with someone like me.
I suck it up and step back out of the way. Kyle enters the apartment slowly, but not without his watchful gaze taking me in. I can feel his eyes on my skin as mine remain aimed at my shoes while I sort through my feelings. Closing the door behind Kyle, I lock it.
His hand reaches beneath my chin, a soft gesture, but the roughness of his fingertips makes my belly flip. He turns my face, lifting it to look up at him. His soulful eyes search mine, pulling all of my secrets to the surface—like some unknown force with the power to possess me. I touch my suddenly dry lips with my tongue, drawing his eyes to them.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Nothing,” I reply.
His brows dip low, and a frown takes over his mouth. He’s too handsome for the scowl that now covers his face. Kyle is a man who should always have that God-given smile in place.
“I’m not about that life, Andy. I don’t lie, and I don’t like being lied to. Something is wrong. What is it?”
His words come out gentle but firm. The authority in them sends a shiver down my spine. I wonder if he has any clue as to how his mere words and presence captivate and draw me in.
His thumb caresses my bottom lip. His eyes remain on mine. His soft touch eases me just a bit, enough to loosen my tongue.
“I just thought we had plans to go out on a date. I didn’t think we’d be dining in. I mean, staying here,” I reply.
Kyle drops his hand, taking a step back. He shifts the bag with the food in his hands, lifting his now free palm to pull it down his face. We lock eyes, and he searches my gaze, nodding his head to some unspoken thought.
“First, you’re way too gorgeous of a man to be insecure. I had my doubts, but I’m seeing that I’m right. That’s exactly what I’m picking up on. We’ll get to that later tonight. I want to know all about you and your past relationships.
“Second, I’m very private abou
t my love life. We can start with that discussion. It’s important to me that you can agree to what I’m willing to give,” he says.
I open my mouth, but I don’t know what to say. He hit the nail on the head. I’ve had a rough go of it. I haven’t always been the man that’s standing before him. He might not be here if he knew more about me.
Kyle cracks that big smile. Reaching for my hand, he laces our fingers together. The rest of my anxiety floats away. He gives a gentle tug, prompting me to lead the way. I start for the living room, thinking of the more intimate setting. It sounds like we’re going to need to get comfortable for the discussion he has planned.
Kyle sits on the couch in front of the coffee table. I take a seat on the floor across from him. I smile when Kyle starts to unpack Thai food, including plates and utensils. I’d mentioned liking Thai at the barbecue. Kyle had been standing nearby, but he wasn’t a part of the conversation. I had no idea he was listening. From the smile on his lips, he knows exactly what I’m thinking.
“When I decide I want something, I pay attention to all the details,” he says.
“I see.” I smile back.
“That blush is sexy. I’ll make sure to make it happen more often,” he says, causing me to blush more.
I focus on the food he’s placing on the plates. It’s all I can do not to turn into the awkward teenager I’d once been. When Kyle pauses in the middle of his actions, I lift my gaze again.
He narrows his eyes and tilts his head. You would think he was trying to figure out how to tug something free from just the right angle. I don’t realize I’ve stopped breathing until he speaks.
“I think I changed my mind. There is a story behind those eyes. I want to know it first. Tell me, Andy. Why so shy?”
I watch my hands smooth over the hardwood of the mahogany coffee table. This isn’t a conversation I’m used to getting into on a first date. Yet I want to share with Kyle. It feels right to do so. I’m more than painfully shy when it comes to men.