by Hadley Quinn
“It’s fine, hon. I’m okay. Baby’s okay.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m positive. Unless it’s bothering you?”
“No,” he smiled. “You’re not big enough to hinder the process, and I have plenty of length to do the job, sweetheart.”
“Oh my,” she laughed as they moved together. “But you might not feel so stoic in another month or two.”
“I accept that challenge, beautiful.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, I’m game.”
“Well aren’t you up for an adventure.”
“With you? In bed? Hell yes.”
He returned to kissing her as they moved effortlessly with one another. She eventually traded him positions as she stripped her lacey top off and straddled him.
Jay could think of all kinds of places and positions he wanted to put this sexy girl in, and he also knew she’d be adventurous right along with him. But the funny thing was…being right here in his own bed with her was probably the boldest move he’d made with a female thus far.
And…he was absolutely okay with it.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Camryn had been watching her too closely for the past few days and Melanie was just waiting for the ball to drop. Her sister obviously knew about her and Jay but for some reason hadn’t said anything about it just yet.
“It’s not like you to keep your opinions to yourself,” Melanie finally said.
They’d been cleaning the house together while Teague was working on a movie set, but besides the music they had playing, their time together was lacking the singing and dancing that usually came with it. Well Melanie had been singing along, but Camryn had been pretty somber.
“So are you finally ready to talk to me about it?” Camryn asked, putting down the cloth she’d been dusting with.
“What do you mean ‘finally ready’?” Melanie asked.
“You know exactly what I mean. You don’t feel like you can come talk to me about stuff anymore?”
“Since it has to do with Jay, then I guess not. All you’ll do is lecture me about what a stupid mistake I’m making.”
Camryn sighed and shook her head, but she didn’t reply right away. After she returned a couple of DVDs to the entertainment center she said, “Mel, I love you and only want what’s best for you. You’re old enough to make your own choices, but it doesn’t mean you have to do it on your own. I’m here if you need to talk about anything. Honestly, Melanie. I want you to talk to me about what is going on between you two.”
“Are you wanting me to classify our relationship? Like are we friends with benefits, or are we actually a couple,” she stated. “Because I really don’t know, Camryn. At first it was the former, and now it feels like the latter. He’s changed, we both have, and it seems to be progressing to something…”
“Serious?” Camryn finished cautiously. She seemed to be surprised but worried at the same time. “Mel, you know that Jay doesn’t do ‘serious’, right? He’s just…not that kind of person. And he’s young, too. I mean twenty-three is just fine for me to settle down and have a family, and it was fine for Teague at twenty-four, but Jay is not like that. He never has been.”
“Oh, so you’re saying that he never will be? That’s kind of narrow-minded, Camryn. People change all the time. Sometimes we just realize our lives are ready for a new direction.”
Camryn sighed and sat down on the arm of the couch. “I know that, Mel. I really do. I’ve had my share of changes too. I know that you’ve been through a lot in your life and I just wanted you to know how proud I am of you. I do respect your decisions, but with Jay I just want you to be careful. I love him like a brother, but the boy is not looking for anything serious right now.”
“And you know this because you asked him and he told you that?” Melanie asked. “Well I know that you didn’t, so stop making assumptions about what he is and isn’t willing to do.”
“I’m not making assumptions. I’m merely giving you a warning based on his personality, his past, and the fact that he has flat out said shit like that to Teague a dozen times. That’s why we’re so worried.”
“So he’s said specifically that he isn’t interested in anything with me? He straight up said he would never settle down with Melanie Jacobs?”
“Ugh, why do ninety percent of our arguments have to do with guys?”
“Why can’t we just agree to disagree this time, Camryn? Seriously, I am not going to change how I feel about Jay because you tell me I should.”
“I’m not telling you to feel differently about him, but to be careful. I don’t want him to hurt you, Melanie. That’s all. And I don’t want having a baby to be any harder on you right now than it already might be.” Camryn paused but studied Melanie intently. “By the way… How do you feel about Jay?”
Arguing with Camryn was much easier for Melanie than expressing her true feelings for Jay. So far she hadn’t cared if Camryn and Teague believed they were just friends with benefits. It was easier to tread through tricky waters with Jay that way. But such an indifferent attitude was almost becoming too difficult for her to bear. She had felt like it made her case weaker if she ever did have to have this conversation with her sister.
Melanie took a steady breath and measured her thoughts, but she felt it was necessary to finally be honest about her feelings for Jay. “I’m in love with him,” she spoke quietly. “I love him, Camryn. I’ve been in love with him for…as long as I’ve been fighting with him,” she barely smiled. “We just…work. I can’t speak for him because I don’t know how he feels entirely, but I know that he cares about me and that he would never purposely try to make my life difficult.”
Melanie knew that Camryn was trying to internalize the confession, which is why she didn’t respond right away, but she was also worried about what her sister’s response would actually be.
“I know that I’ve said I’ve been ‘in love’ before,” Melanie added, using air quotes. “I know what you’re thinking, Cam. But…this is different. I swear to you, sis, this is so different that…sometimes I can’t even breathe when I think about him. Sometimes when he smiles at me, or does or says something sweet, I feel so happy inside that it doesn’t feel normal. He makes me so happy that I can’t even believe it sometimes. I’ve never had anyone make me feel like that—someone that I just can’t imagine not being in my life. He does that to me. Turns me inside out but in a good way.”
Camryn lifted an eyebrow, obviously surprised. She took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I’m not sure what to say, Mel.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” Melanie answered. “Just know how I feel about him and just let us work things out between the two of us. I know Jay is difficult, but there is so much more to him than you and Teague give him credit for. Does he have the ability to break my heart? Yes. He absolutely does. I want to be with him but I know there is a lot for him to work through before he gets to that point.”
“And if he doesn’t come around?”
“Then I take my broken heart and have to move on. I can’t force him to feel the same way about me that I do him. But for now I’m willing to take the risk because he’s worth it.”
She took a deep breath, feeling relieved and confused at the same time as she released it. It was like getting a pile of confessions off her chest, just by finally telling her sister how she really felt about Jay, but she also knew he had the power to break her in two. He could crush her heart and for some illogical reason she was willing to let him.
“I’m going to go clean the bathroom and then shower and get ready to go out with Jay,” Melanie said, heading for the hall.
“Like on a date?” Camryn smiled warily. “Where’s he taking you?”
“I’m not sure,” Melanie couldn’t help but grin. “But I can’t freaking wait!”
***
“So how often do you come to music venues?” Melanie asked as Jay led her into the Viper Room on Sunset Boulevard. She�
�d never been inside the place but had always wanted to, and anything that had to do with live music was right up her alley.
“Not much anymore,” Jay responded with a shrug as they walked to a table at the very back of the room. “Too busy working.”
“Well thank you for taking the time to bring me here,” she smiled at him.
“It’s not like it’s a chore or anything,” he lightly laughed, kissing her on the head before they slid into seats.
Such a simple act made her heart thud in her chest and she reached for his hand to hold it. “I don’t even care who’s playing, I just like being here with you,” she said softly.
“I know, ‘cause I’m easy on the eyes,” he winked, sliding his arm behind her.
Melanie laughed, almost regretting how many times she’d told him it was only bearable to be around him because he was easy on the eyes. But she leaned over and kissed his mouth slowly and seductively, using just a tad bit of tongue to make it productive. “No, it’s because I love being with you,” she spoke softly against his lips.
He studied her for a few seconds before placing his hand behind her neck to deepen the kiss. Why he did stuff like that in public was confusing because all it did was turn her on extremely fast and there was nothing she could do about it.
“Stop it,” she warned him, pushing his chest away with a smile.
“You don’t like how I kiss you?” he cocked an eyebrow.
“You get me wet and you know it,” she narrowed her eyes at him.
He raised both eyebrows that time, but after a few seconds of looking at her without a response, he barely smirked and leaned back against his seat to face the stage. A waiter took their drink orders and by the time Jay’s beer and Melanie’s lemon water was set in front of them, the band was ready to start their set.
With their seats in a darkened corner at the back of the room and loud music playing, Melanie was not surprised when Jay’s hand slid over her knee and up her skirt. He leaned over and kissed her neck, sucking on her earlobe before he said, “I know why you wear skirts all the time when you’re around me.”
Melanie tried not to laugh but answered, “Because they look good with my boots?”
She felt Jay smile against her cheek and his hand inched up her thigh even further. “They do look damn good with those boots. But I wish I had those boots wrapped around me right now.”
“We don’t have to stay,” she replied as he was now kissing her lips.
Again she felt him smile against her mouth but his fingers were now slipping into her panties. It didn’t matter where this boy touched her she was a goner almost instantly, but this turned her on all sorts of degrees. As his mouth aggressively sucked her lower lip, Jay’s fingers pushed inside of her and Melanie’s thoughts were only on how her body was reacting to him. They had plenty of privacy at the back of the room, but she might not have cared if they didn’t.
Jay slowed down the kissing until he stopped altogether, but he continued the work between her legs as they watched the band finish the current song. Melanie was a weakened mess by the time he was done with her. She studied him for a moment in the light from the stage. His cocky smile was actually beautiful and it made her pulse race even more. And the fact that he sucked his fingers clean as he winked at her caused Melanie to laugh and shake her head at his brazenness.
She leaned close to his shoulder and said, “Unless you switch me places so you’re in the corner, you’re not getting a return favor until the car.”
Jay laughed, but instead of making a response, he slid his arm around her and tucked her against him to watch the rest of the show.
The band that they’d come to see was really good and Melanie truly enjoyed their performance. Jay even introduced her to them afterwards and it was obvious that they all knew each other. The lead singer, Hannah, was gorgeous, and Melanie got the slight impression that she and Jay had probably hooked up before. The thought of Jay with other women wasn’t exactly a new concept, but it did actually bother Melanie more than she liked to admit.
But when Jay told Hannah that Melanie had song lyrics she needed to bounce off of someone, Hannah was extremely interested. They sat at the back of the lounge again with drinks and discussed some upcoming projects for the next thirty minutes. Even though Melanie felt uncomfortable talking about some of the lyrics she’d written, Hannah wanted to get together sometime to look through them.
By the end of the night, when Jay led her out to the car, Melanie felt like she had a permanent smile stuck to her face. It had been an amazing date, but not because of the music and meeting Hannah and her band, but because she was so comfortable and happy with Jay she wanted to burst. Life could not get any better, even when he took her for frozen yogurt on the way home and then took a drive to the beach and parked in the dark.
Jay received a very well deserved “thank you” for such a wonderful night.
On the drive back to his house, Melanie felt her eyes water because of how happy she felt. She was glad it was dark and Jay couldn’t see, but whether it was pregnancy hormones or just straight up love for the man next to her, life was finally feeling like it was coming together for once. Everything about being with Jay McCallan felt right, from the way he held her hand wherever they went to the way he even still joked with her facetiously now and then. Not once did he ever mention the word “girlfriend” or anything that suggested what their relationship was, but Melanie didn’t care. She was happy with him in whatever capacity he allowed, but there was an ease about him as well. She could tell he was happy too, and that meant the world to her.
When they got back to his house, he took her straight to his room and stripped her naked. Despite the long night and previous sexual acts, this time there was no discretion about it—except for limiting the noises made since Tyse was probably in his room.
Jay even tucked Melanie up against him while he was awake and he softly ran his fingers over her bare shoulders while they just laid there in the dark. The last thing Melanie remembered as she drifted off to sleep was thinking about how much she loved him and wouldn’t trade him for anything in the world, so when his phone rang at two in the morning, it jolted her out of a deep, peaceful sleep.
Her heart was already pounding from being woken so abruptly, but when she heard Jay’s end of the conversation, she could already tell it was something horrible. He was up and out of bed, trying to find his clothes. Melanie turned on the lamp and rubbed her eyes, not understanding why she felt so scared at that moment.
“What happened?” she asked as Jay was grabbing his keys from the nightstand. Even though he’d just woken up, there was something more to his face that made Melanie feel sick.
“Something happened to Beck,” was all he replied, and he was out the door instantly. He must have run to his car because she heard it rumble only a few seconds later, and then his tires screeched down the road.
Chapter Twenty-Six
This could not be happening. It just couldn’t fucking be happening. It was all a joke, right? One minute Jay’s feeling like a man on top of the world, and the next minute he’s suffocating in a hole in the ground buried by guilt.
Beck. He just couldn’t believe it. No, it wasn’t true.
Jay had lain there in bed with Melanie, feeling like his life was coming together, and then she whispered that she loved him. Yeah she was drifting into la-la land, but he fucking believed it. Everything about her screamed it in his face and he was beginning to need it in his life. For some reason he’d asked, “Are you sure?” but it was several seconds after she’d uttered the words, and she didn’t respond. He knew she was asleep by then.
Beck. Jay had felt some of his pride dissipate as he enjoyed his night with Melanie. By the time she fell asleep in his arms, he knew it was time to listen to his gut and make things right with his friend. It was inconceivable that Kyle would call him ten seconds later to hit him with the news.
Beck had been shot.
“Oh my God,” Jay whis
pered to himself as he drove way over the speed limit for the hospital. Kyle had been crying on the phone and could barely tell him anything. Beck had just been loaded into an ambulance, and all he understood from Kyle was that it didn’t look good.
When Jay finally made it to the emergency entrance, an ambulance had just pulled up, and even though Jay didn’t have to look to find out, he knew it was Beck. He saw Kyle appear, and then two paramedics worked to pull out the gurney that Beck was strapped to. There was blood everywhere, all over his chest and all over the EMTs.
“Beck,” Jay called as he approached, not caring if they told him to move or to leave or to fuck off.
He thought for sure his friend was already dead. He looked it. But Beck barely opened his eyes as the paramedics started to rush him through the emergency doors.
“Jay,” Beck’s weak voice answered.
“He’s lost a lot of blood,” Kyle said, keeping up with them too.
“Hey buddy, you’re gonna be okay,” Jay said to Beck. The paramedic next to him was telling him to please move, but he wasn’t able to leave yet as he kept up pace beside them.
“Jay,” Beck said again. “I’m…I’m…sor…buddy… Sorry,” he barely whispered.
And at that very moment, Jay knew. He just knew. There wasn’t anything in the world that would convince him otherwise, he just knew.
He would never talk to Beck again.
A paramedic held him back so he couldn’t go with them through double doors. He was numb anyways, Beck’s words repeating through his head over and over. Kyle was next to him, but Jay couldn’t comprehend what he was saying or doing or even what he looked like at that moment. Jay leaned against the wall for support as a nurse came up and put her hand on his arm.
“Don’t touch me,” he said quietly, pulling away.