If the Shoes Fit

by Pauline Lawless

  “My pleasure,” she curtsied, moving into his arms. They danced close for a few moments, rocking to the music. She could feel his hardness through her dress and when he started caressing her body, she couldn’t restrain herself any more. Letting go, she moved sensuously with him and when he pulled her down on the rug in front of the fire, they made delicious love with the flickering light of the fire and candles playing across their bodies.

  “Oh, it’s been far, far too long,” he sighed, burying his face in her hair.

  She threw back her head and laughed huskily. “I agree,” she replied as he kissed her throat. God! He was a fantastic lover.

  They finally got to eat the tiramisu about two hours later and after they finished the wine he carried her into bed where he took her once more. They fell asleep, wrapped around each other, both satiated and happy. She smiled smugly as she dropped off. She had him now. She knew how to please him. She’d make sure from now on that he’d need her by his side, forever.

  Niamh was putting out the bin on Wednesday night when she spotted the empty bottle of wine.

  “Where did this come from, Gav?” she asked him, coming into the living-room with it in her hand.

  He dragged his eyes away from the match on the telly and blushed when he saw what she was holding. “Oh, that . . .”

  “Yes, that,” she said grimly, knowing from the shifty way he couldn’t meet her eye that he was hiding something.

  “Oh, Val brought it over with her the other night,” he mumbled.

  “What other night?” she wanted to know although she knew exactly when it was.

  “The night you were at your party,” he muttered, still unable to look her in the eye.

  “My sister was here, drinking wine with you while I was out working, and you didn’t bother to mention it?” she said, her voice rising with every word.

  “Well, I meant to . . . but you know . . . ahem,” he coughed, quaking under her ferocious gaze. “Well, eh . . . when you got home we started smooching,” he stammered, picking at his nail, still avoiding her gaze, “and it went clean out of my head,” he ended lamely.

  “You wouldn’t have told me at all if I hadn’t found this bottle, would you?” she demanded, her eyes and cheeks blazing.

  He didn’t answer and she turned her back, flinging the bottle so hard into the bin that it broke. She went up to the bedroom and sat on the bed, shaking. Why had Val called around on a night when she knew Niamh, was out at a party and why had she brought a bottle of wine? Nothing Val did surprised Niamh, but why, oh why, had Gav not mentioned it? What was he hiding?

  Niamh was very upset and didn’t know what to think. She was so angry with him but more than that, she was scared. He’d always been truthful with her, or so she’d thought. Now she didn’t know what to think.

  He came up a little later and tried to make up to her but she didn’t want to know.

  “I’m sorry, babe, truly I am,” he said, stroking her hair. “I should have told you and I’m really sorry now that I didn’t.” He took her in his arms. “I love you, hon – you know that. Look at the great sex we had that night.” He moved his hand down to her breast. “It put Val’s visit right out of my head and then yesterday I’d forgotten about it.” He reached over and slid his tongue over her bottom lip, at the same time slipping his hand inside her bra, rubbing her nipple gently with his fingers.

  She couldn’t help it. She found herself melting and before she knew what was happening he was pulling her clothes off and they were both panting as he rolled on top of her. It was wild and passionate and she climaxed almost immediately. Afterwards, relieved that she wasn’t angry with him any more, he lay cradling her in his arms until she fell asleep.

  Chapter 35

  Niamh couldn’t believe how much she had saved and went online every night to check her bank balance. It was incredible. She already almost had the money for the deposit for their house. She hoped the bank manager would keep his word. She needn’t have worried. As she was waiting in line at the bank the following morning, he spotted her and smiling broadly came over to her. “Niamh, lovely to see you again. If you have a moment, perhaps you’d drop into my office before you leave.”

  She felt a sinking in her stomach and hoped that nothing was wrong. He had been smiling but that didn’t mean anything. Nervously, she knocked on his door.

  “Niamh, thank you for stopping by. Please take a seat.” He pulled out a chair for her. She perched nervously on the edge of her seat, wondering what was coming. He peered at the computer, tapping at the keys with one finger.

  “Hmmm . . . as I thought. I saw this last week and couldn’t believe it. How have you managed to save so much in such a short time?”

  For a brief moment Niamh wondered if he thought she was laundering money but then he continued. “This shoe business seems to be very successful. Congratulations!” He gave her a big smile. “You must be working very hard.”

  “Yes, it is great, especially at the moment,” she smiled shyly back at him. “I have over seventy representatives at the moment which is the secret of my success.”

  “Well, I never!” he exclaimed. “Maybe you could drop me in a brochure of your shoes. Perhaps my wife would like a pair for Christmas.”

  “I have one right here,” Niamh grinned, handing him a brochure of the shoes and the bags.

  “Well, you’re on the ball, no doubt about that,” he laughed. “No wonder you’re so successful. I’ll give you a call if my wife decides she’d like a pair. She’s a devil for shoes and bags,” he sighed.

  “She’s not alone,” Niamh laughed. “That’s why I’m doing so well.”

  “It goes without saying that any time you want this mortgage, you let me know. There won’t be any problem if you can keep going like this.”

  Niamh flushed with pleasure. “Thank you so much, Mr Shannon,” she said. “I’ll hold you to that and don’t forget to call me about your wife’s shoes.”

  “I won’t,” he laughed, as he showed her out.

  The following day, Niamh had a call from Mr Shannon asking her if she could drop in more brochures as some of his colleagues were interested and could she also please call his wife as she was crazy about the shoes and so were all her friends. Niamh could see her bank balance growing by the minute.

  Chapter 36

  Carlo couldn’t get Amber out of his mind all week. He wanted to know what had caused her withdrawal from him. They had been getting on so well. She’d opened up to him and he’d begun to think that he was really getting to know her and then wham – she’d shut down on him. It disturbed him and he wanted to get to the bottom of it. On the spur of the moment, he called her on Saturday evening.

  Amber was surprised to hear from him. She was feeling quite low as Tessa had gone down to Ballyfern to stay with her friend Kate and the apartment was very lonely without her.

  “I know it is short notice,” he said, his voice sounding more Italian than ever over the phone, “but I would really like to talk to you, Amber. Would you meet me for a drink tonight?”

  Something in his voice touched her and before she knew it, she was saying yes.

  He arrived at her door less than an hour later and Amber let him in, feeling once again the strong attraction he held for her. He was proffering a bottle of Masi Amarone.

  “One of my favourite wines – I hope you’ll like it,” he smiled.

  She took it from him, her hand shaking. “Thank you, that’s lovely. I’ve heard Tessa raving about this wine.”

  “Better drink it before she gets her hands on it then,” he laughed.

  “Don’t worry, she’s gone away for the weekend,” Amber said. She hesitated for a moment before saying, “Would you prefer me to open this now and we could stay in? The pubs are pretty packed around here on a Saturday night.”

  “That would be perfect,” Carlo replied, his smile melting her heart.

  She took down the glasses while he opened the wine. She had some cheese in the fridg
e – Italian, as it turned out – so she put this on a cheese board with some water biscuits.

  “Fantastic!” he whistled, as she set it down. “Pecorino and Gorgonzola – I’m in heaven. You are obviously a fan of all things Italian.”

  “Oh, yes,” she said earnestly. “I love Italian cuisine.”

  “Italian men, I meant,” he grinned, making her blush.

  “Not until now,” she grinned back at him.

  “That’ll do,” he laughed, throwing his head back as he did so.

  They sipped the wine as they left the cheese to warm up. They chatted easily and Carlo was amazed, yet again, at how well they got on. Amber was relaxed and enjoying herself when he reached across to take her hand. She tried to pull away but Carlo held fast. Then he reached over and kissed her on the lips. For a moment she responded but then he felt her freeze and pull away from him.

  “Amber, what is it? Why do you shy away from me? You know I’m very fond of you but whenever I try to get close, you push me away.”

  “I’m sorry, Carlo,” she whispered, her lower lip trembling. “I’m very fond of you too but somehow I can’t let go. I don’t know why. I’m too scared of getting hurt. I suppose I’m just not ready. I’m still not over my marriage.”

  He wanted to take her in his arms and quell her fears but he knew she wouldn’t allow it. Defeated, he let her go.

  “Do you think you could still be in love with your ex-husband?” he asked.

  “I don’t know,” she murmured. “I just don’t know. But I do know that I’m not ready to love again.”

  Carlo gathered up his coat. “I can’t tell you how much this saddens me, Amber,” he said quietly. “I think we really could have made it and I wish we had, but obviously it’s not meant to be.” As he left, he looked at her sadly, “I truly hope you find yourself, my darling. You’re a wonderful woman.”

  After he’d left, she sat crying softly. Was it true, what he’d said? Was she still in love with Dermot? If so, then her life was well and truly fucked. All she knew was that she was afraid of where her feelings with Carlo would take her. She was scared of surrendering herself to him and losing herself, as she had done with Dermot. She recognised that Carlo had that same power and this was what frightened her. She wished Susie was not in New York on a weekend break or Tessa in Ballyfern. She badly needed to talk to one of them. Breaking her promise never to drink alone, she opened another bottle of wine and polished it off, wallowing in her misery.

  Tessa was having a lovely time in Ballyfern. Napoleon was overjoyed to see her and never left her side all weekend. Kate had pulled out all the stops. She’d invited her friends, Lauren, Jenny and Tara around for supper and over a bottle of champagne, they laughingly welcomed Tessa into the Because We’re Worth It club.

  “Now, you must tell me – you promised you would. What club is that?” Tessa asked.

  Kate explained that when they’d first got together, in Tara’s slimming club, they’d given each other such support and friendship that it had raised their self-esteem and made them feel worthwhile.

  “Hence the name ‘Because We’re Worth It’.” On cue, all four girls flicked back their hair, just like in the L’Oréal ad.

  “Oh, I get it,” Tessa laughed, turning her head so that her long silky hair swirled out behind her. “I am very honoured to be admitted into this illustrious club,” she announced, swirling her hair once more.

  They all roared with laughter.

  Tessa had a wonderful evening and Kate was delighted to see how relaxed and happy she had become.

  “Life in Dublin obviously suits you,” she remarked.

  “Well, I’m very happy at the moment although I miss Napoleon and Kilkenny, of course, but once I get my own place and can have them back with me, everything will be fine. I’m actually thinking of looking for a place between here and the city – I guess I’m a country girl at heart.” She smiled around the table at the girls.

  “How’s the love life?” Lauren asked her, grinning. “Anyone special?”

  “Sadly, no,” Tessa said wistfully.

  Kate sensed there was something she wasn’t telling them and hoped to find out when the two of them were alone.

  She got her chance as she and Tessa sat finishing their wine later.

  “Have you met somebody?” she asked Tessa.

  “Well, I fancy somebody but unfortunately he only has eyes for Amber,” she replied, her eyes downcast.

  “Is Amber keen on him?” Kate wanted to know.

  “That’s the problem,” Tessa told her, coiling her hair up in a knot. “She fancies him okay but doesn’t want to get involved. She’s still hurting from her divorce.”

  “That’s crazy,” Kate said. “It’s been a while now, hasn’t it?”

  “Yeah, over a year,” Tessa replied, “but she just can’t seem to put it behind her.”

  “Love is so complicated,” Kate sighed. “Changing the subject, have you any plans for Christmas?”

  “I’m going to Galway to visit my parents,” Tessa said. “I haven’t seen them since the summer.”

  “Well, you’re very welcome to spend Christmas with us if your plans should change, although it’s like a madhouse here when all the boys are home.”

  “Thanks, but I think you’ll have enough to cope with,” Tessa said, laughing. “You’re so kind, Kate,” she added, hugging her friend.

  On Sunday, she took Kilkenny for a long trek and felt sad having to leave both him and Napoleon and head back to the big smoke.

  Chapter 37

  Rosie was delighted with the way her business was growing and, as she told Gail, laughingly, there weren’t enough hours in the day for her. Gail was so happy to see the change in her mother. It was like a miracle. Rosie was also getting great mileage out of her computer and was delighted to be in such close contact with David in Australia. It was lovely to hear what he and his family were doing on a day-to-day basis and to receive photographs of her grandchildren regularly. She missed David dreadfully, especially since Jack’s death, but she would never let him know how much. She would be eternally grateful to him for giving her the computer, as she told him often.

  Hugo was emailing her more than ever and at times the frequency of it irritated her so much she didn’t reply. He didn’t understand that her business was now taking up so much of her time and she really didn’t feel the need to justify herself to him. When she’d mentioned to him that she was dreading Christmas without Jack, he asked her if she would spend it with him. She politely turned him down. She was beginning to realise that he was becoming dependant on her and it scared her. She was just beginning to find her own feet and the last thing she wanted now was a needy man. She was happy to have him as a friend but she feared that he wanted more. She most definitely wasn’t ready for a romantic relationship with anyone. How to cool it without hurting his feelings? It was a dilemma. However, she was too busy right now to give it much thought.

  Niamh had really fallen behind with the housework. Although Gavin was free every day and the kids at school, he did the bare minimum around the house, such as loading the dishwasher. Anything else, in Gavin’s book, was woman’s work. Bridget had certainly nurtured this thinking. She decided to tackle the washing the following Saturday night when she realised that there were no clean clothes left in the hot press.

  She emptied out the wash basket, sorting the clothes as she did so. She thought she smelt something unusual and sniffing around realised that it was coming from Gavin’s shirt. She sniffed again. No mistake – it was perfume – and not her Body Shop White Musk either. She recognised the scent but couldn’t quite place it. What was it doing on Gav’s shirt? It was then that she saw the lipstick on the collar.

  She sank to the floor, feeling as if someone had punched her in the stomach. What could this mean? How did this lipstick get on Gav’s shirt – and the perfume? She felt sick as she realised that there could be only one explanation. Would he really do this to her? Had he been with
another woman? He had every opportunity. She was out working every day and he was out most nights. She never questioned where he went. She trusted him. Maybe that was a mistake. He was still very attractive to women and could have had anyone he wanted. Oh, God! What should she do? Everything was going so well for them right now. She loved him so much. She couldn’t bear to think of her life without him. She was sure that he loved her too. Would he really have gone with someone else? The thought made her feel ill.

  In a trance, she put the washing in the machine and then curled up in bed to think what she could do. If she tackled him he would surely deny it – wasn’t that what all men did? Was it a one-night-stand? That she could probably forgive. Or was it a full-blown affair? Suddenly, she was very afraid. Her whole world, everything she’d worked for, would be worthless if Gav wasn’t by her side. She couldn’t bear to think about it? Was it her fault? Was she too involved in the business and neglecting him? Her mind went round and round until she fell into a fitful sleep.

  She woke to feel Gav’s arm around her as he lay spooned into her in the bed. She hadn’t heard him coming in. She lay in the warmth of his body, wide awake now and thinking things over in her head. Before she finally fell back asleep again, around dawn, she’d made up her mind to say nothing to him but to keep a close eye on him in the coming days. This she did, hating herself for going through his pockets and checking his mobile phone for text messages and incoming calls. She found nothing suspicious and it was all she could do to keep her mind on her work as she worried herself sick about the problem.

  December was the busiest month of the year in the Hot Bods club and so Val found herself working every single night. She should have been having parties for If the Shoes Fit but she was making so much money in the club that she couldn’t see the point. She enjoyed the attention from the hordes of men who flocked to the club to round off their annual Christmas parties. Being well tanked up with alcohol, they were absurdly generous with their tips, vying with each other to be the most generous, often flashing fifty and one-hundred-euro notes at the girls. Val got more than her fair share of these as she gyrated and flirted with the clientele.