Twisted Paths

by L. L. Collins

  “It’s really happening,” a voice comes from behind me.

  “And we couldn’t be happier for both of you,” another follows. I turn and see Brooke and Brianna. Seeing them here means so much to me.

  “You came,” I say, fighting against the tears that continue to threaten.

  “We weren’t missing this one,” Brooke says. “Not after all this. It’s about time you became our sister.”

  “You’re made for each other,” Brianna says. “We’re so happy for all three of you.”

  I want to talk to everyone, but Mia shoos everyone back to their spots so the ceremony can begin. The music changes and I don’t recognize the song. Carter steps up, seeming to know his role.

  “Ready, Mom?”

  “Thank you, Carter,” I say. “This means so much to me.”

  He smiles. “You deserve this. You both do. I can only hope that someday I find this kind of love and I don’t have to wait a lifetime for it. You should’ve had each other all along, Mom.” After everything this young man has had to deal with in the last few months, I can’t believe he’s able to say that and mean it.

  When we turn to walk down the aisle, I listen to the lyrics. I don’t know who sings it, but the words about wanting you to be my wife resonate through my body. It’s like Blake is signing these words directly to me. I can’t make myself look at anyone else but Blake. I can’t believe I’m here. I thought I was going to have a romantic dinner, and here I am, getting married. To the love of my life, the man I never thought I’d get to have again. While Ronan had been the reason all those years ago that we didn’t get our chance, he was also the reason we were getting the chance today. The chance to be the family we should’ve been. I’m choosing not to think about the years that were stolen away from us, but to look forward. The beginning of our new lives is today.

  When I reach Blake, Carter wraps us both in a hug before we turn and grasp hands. And that’s when I hear it. He whispers ‘Dad’ to Blake for the first time. The moment isn’t lost on any of us, and we spend a moment linked together before he lets go.

  The minister says a few words and the guests sit, but all I can do is look into the dark eyes of my love; the man that’s going to get the rest of my forevers. I won’t ever have to worry about us again. I’m still not sure that my brain is completely working at capacity. I may still be in shock. I’m going to be Liane McIntyre. Finally.

  The minister must say something about vows, because Blake squeezes my hand and clears his throat. Oh God. He wrote his own vows. This is totally not fair. I had no warning!

  “Li,” he begins. “For as long as I can remember, you’ve been a part of my life. Every good memory I have has you in it. You started as my best friend and became so much more. We’ve lived our share of difficult, even impossible times. But yet, here we are, standing here together. Because love doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be exactly what you need. And I need you. I always have, and I always will. We both know what we went through without each other, and I take comfort in knowing that we never again have to be apart. Your soul and mine were always on the same path, it was just the rest of us that got lost. I’ll never stop being thankful to get this second chance at our forever. We’re not just us now; we’re a family. I promise to always cherish every second I get with you and Carter. I promise to love you more every single day, and to never take for granted the love that we have. I’ll be there for you, to support you. There will never be a day in your life that you question my love for you, Liane. I love you.” He slides a ring on my finger, but I can’t see it. I’m blinded by the tears that continue to spill over onto my cheeks.

  He reaches over and dabs my eyes with a tissue, his smile full of so much love and promise I find myself wondering what I ever did to deserve this man. The minister looks at me expectedly, and I sigh. How can I ever top that?

  “I’m a little unprepared,” I laugh, and I can hear the soft laughs behind me. “That’s so not fair,” I whisper loud enough for everyone to hear. Blake laughs, and my heart squeezes. I love every single thing about this man. “Blake McIntyre, you’ve always been there for me. From the time we were little kids and you would always make sure I was okay, to being teenagers and spending hours talking on the phone, you’ve always been one of the very few people I knew I could turn to. I’ve been in love with you for so long, I can’t even pinpoint when it happened for me. But life had other plans for us,” I stop, trying but failing to talk around the lump in my throat. “It isn’t fair, what happened to us. But like you said, our souls always knew where we belonged. It just took logistics and fate to figure out how to get us back together again. But when two people are meant to be, nothing can keep them apart. I think we’ve proven that. Despite everything, here we are. We could stand here and talk about all the bad things that happened and the time we’ve lost. Or we can focus on what we have and how to make the most of the second chance we’ve been given. That’s what I’m choosing to think about. We have a beautiful family and wonderful friends. And best of all, we get our happily-ever-after. I promise to always put you first and show you every day how grateful I am to have you in my life. I promise you’ll never go a day without me telling you and showing you how much I love you. I’m always and forever yours, Blake. I love you.”

  I take the ring (where did the ring come from?) and slip it on his finger, lifting my eyes to look into his. And that’s when I notice that tears are streaking down his face. I take my tissue and wipe at them softly. He pulls me to him and kisses me before the minister says anything, but I’m pretty sure this whole wedding has been rather unorthodox. The guests begin cheering, but all I can concentrate on is my new husband’s face.

  “Mrs. McIntyre,” he whispers against my lips. “My dream come true. My reason for living.”

  A flutter rolls through my stomach. “Our dream come true,” I echo. “My husband. And the father to my children.”

  He smiles before he catches what I said. His brow furrows as he processes what I mean. “Children?” I nod, and he looks down at my still flat stomach. It won’t be for too much longer, though. “Li,” he whispers. “Are you serious?”

  Tears shimmer in both of our eyes as we’re lost in the moment. “Yes. You’re going to be a Daddy. Again. We get to do this together, Blake. All of it.” If my timing is right, I got pregnant the night we got engaged. Our little miracle became part of us the night we recommitted ourselves to each other forever.

  He buries his head in my neck, and I feel his hot tears. When he pulls back, he puts his hands on my stomach. “Thank you,” he whispers. I’m not sure if he’s talking to me or our unborn baby, but I know we have so much to be thankful for. Our paths finally came together, and now we were going to be headed in the same direction. Forever.

  “GO GET YOUR brother!” I yell, running through the water so she won’t get me with the slimy seaweed. She finds this even funnier, though, just like I expected. I’m not getting out of this one. Her blonde curls bounce as her little legs run as fast as they can to get to me. Her brother follows, picking up his own seaweed and following her. That kid will do anything that his sister does.

  “Daddy!” she calls. “You want some seaweed for lunch! I know you do!” I zigzag through the sand, not trying to get far. I know she’s going to catch me, and I’m going to get slimed. I fall, holding up my hands in mock surrender. “Don’t get me, Gretchen! Don’t do it! Please! I’ll do anything!”

  She stops, dangling the seaweed over my bare stomach, and Jackson stops behind her, waiting to see what she’s going to do. “Anything? Like extra dessert or going to bed late?” She has me, and she knows it. Then again, she has since the day she was born. Jackson cheers, waiting to see what his sister is going to do for them. Gretchen Liane McIntyre was born seven months after we got married, and she’s been the apple of my eye ever since. She’s now five years old and starting kindergarten in a few weeks. Jackson Philip McIntyre is three years old and my little sidekick. When he isn’t foll
owing his big sister around, that is.

  “Gretchen Liane,” a voice comes from behind me. I smile, knowing I just got saved. Gretchen turns, flinging the seaweed behind her so her mom doesn’t see it. “Are you being a good little girl?” Jackson runs and attaches himself to her legs, probably trying to pretend he wasn’t in on the debauchery. Typical little brother.

  She beams at her mom. Gretchen is a spitting image of her, except for her dark eyes like me, while Jackson looks just like me but has Liane’s light green eyes. “Daddy said he was going to give me and Jackson extra dessert and let us stay up late tonight. Isn’t that awesome?” Liane’s gaze slides over to me, and I laugh, standing up and brushing off the sand.

  “I did not,” I say, stepping up and kissing her gently. “How’s he doing?” I lean down and press my lips against my newborn son’s forehead. Blake Logan McIntryre Jr. (also known as Logan) is just three weeks old and making his debut at our time share. He’s our last one, our family now complete with three boys and a girl. Liane looks just as beautiful as the day I first kissed her out on this beach, if not more so.

  “He’s good,” she says, lowering him into my arms. He squirms then resettles, his mouth pursing back and forth like he was still nursing. Gretchen and Jackson stop what they’re doing and walk gently up to their brother, each of them kissing him on the head. Gretchen is a natural and a little mother hen. Jackson, on the other hand, still has to be reminded what gentle means. I sit down in the beach chair, and Li sits next to me, her hand naturally resting on my leg. Gretchen and Jackson go back to running through the water and chasing each other.

  “If only I had that much energy,” Li jokes. “Hopefully they’ll sleep well tonight.” I don’t answer, my gaze stuck on looking at her. Her blonde hair is pulled into a haphazard ponytail and she has on no makeup, but it’s when she looks like this that I love her the most. When she’s just her. She’s always worried about losing baby weight or not looking the same as she gets older, but I don’t see any of that. She doesn’t believe me, but it’s true.

  Looking at her, I remember the day I stood in the house she shared with Ronan, helping her pack. I remember looking at their family picture and wishing it had been me there with her. Now it is me with her. Our family now complete, we’re having family pictures taken while we’re out here this week. Our whole house is full of pictures of all the kids, but I know this one is going to be even more special. In our picture, I’ll have the love of my life, my hand protectively around her waist like I’d dreamt, and we’ll be surrounded by our four kids.

  We’ve been married over five years, and there are still some days that I look at her and can’t believe it finally happened. She’s mine. We have a grown son that just graduated from college and three little rugrats that keep our lives busy but blessed. Carter has been a big part of his siblings’ life, even though he’s been away at school. He’d transferred to another school a year after he was here, after he was all healed from his accident. He comes home as often as he can to spend time with them, and they absolutely adore him. When he’s around, it’s like we don’t exist at all. I’d been worried when we first had Gretchen how Carter would take it, after everything he’d gone through finding out I was his dad. I know that he still talks to Ronan sometimes, and that’s fine with me. As much as I detest the guy, I can’t take away the Dad that had raised him. But Carter and I are as close as father and son. I make a point to call or text him every day. He might think it’s overkill, but I want him to know I’m there. He’s at an important interview for an internship he really wants, and then he’ll come to visit us for a few days. I’ll miss him if he moves out of state, but he’s an adult now and has to follow his own dreams.

  Our wedding had been the best day of my life. I not only married my best friend, but I found out that we were expecting Gretchen, and Carter blessed me by calling me Dad for the first time. When Gretchen was born, I helped deliver her. After missing so much for so long, there wasn’t a thing that I didn’t want to do. I cut her umbilical cord and gave her to Li. Just when I thought I had cried enough at our wedding, my daughter came along. She was like the icing on the cake for us. I think she made it real for both of us, that we really were here doing this together. When Jackson and now Logan came, I did the same. I never wanted her or my children to think I wasn’t 100% in with them at all times.

  Li had been staying home with our kids since Gretchen was born, helping me with my books at the shop when she needs to get out. She says she doesn’t miss teaching at all, but I continue to ask her. I don’t want her to ever think she’s stuck into doing something. I know she felt like that for most of her life, and I don’t ever want to do that to her. I’ve scaled back on my work quite a bit. The first few months I closed at six o’clock and told my guys to go home, they would look at me like I had three heads. For years, I’d stayed open from seven in the morning until sometimes nine or ten at night, working my life away. The only exception had been the week a year I closed the shop completely when I went to brood at Sanibel. But now, as much as I loved my shop and it was my first dream come true, it wasn’t my priority anymore. I needed and wanted to be with my family. My kids were growing so fast, and I never wanted to look back on my life and realize I didn’t help them grow up.

  I’d made one of my best guys a manager, and I no longer worked weekends. Guess what? The shop was running just fine. My business was booming. Now I shut down the shop for two weeks a summer, and gave them all a vacation. We’d bought a time share here, just like we’d always planned, right after Gretchen was born. We started bringing her here when she was just a few months old. We live just forty five minutes away, but that doesn’t matter. This is our place, and we love being here. We now have friends that we see here every year, and every time I see Gretchen and now Jackson running around with their kids, Li and I exchange a look, wondering if our kids will find what we found here someday. If I could rewind back and talk to my eighteen year old self, I would tell him to hang on, that it’s all worth it. Every moment of pain, sadness, and regret will turn into the happiest, most fulfilled life he can imagine. Because sometimes we have to go through the storms to see the rainbow. I’d continued to go to my meetings and keep in touch with my sponsor, but it wasn’t necessary anymore. Even in stressful times, I had no inkling to turn to alcohol. I did enjoy mentoring others and helping them on their journey, though.

  She leans over, and I think she’s checking on Logan. But she’s presses her lips against my neck instead. “I love you,” she whispers. “We have everything, Blake. There’s not a day that goes by that I’m not thankful.”

  “Me too,” I whisper back, using my free hand to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear. Gretchen and Jackson take that opportunity to run up and plop in her lap, hugging us tightly. My whole world is in our arms, right here, right now. “We sure do have everything.”

  I SIT, TAPPING my foot nervously against the floor as I wait to be called back for my interview. This is it. I’m really here. My phone buzzes, and I see it’s a text from my dad. Good luck today, son. I love you. I smile. He always remembers every single detail about me. Over the last five years, we’d become so close that I could almost forget he hadn’t raised me. Almost. It had taken me quite a while to come to terms with what my other dad, Ronan, had done, but I’d come to terms with it. I didn’t like it, or agree with the way he handled mine and my mom’s life, but I had to forgive him and move on. My mom had actually been instrumental in that. Seeing her, and the happiness she allowed herself to have, helped me see that the forgiveness wasn’t for him, it was for me. We talked every once and a while, and I’d seen him a handful of times over the years, most recently being my college graduation, but it felt awkward and stilted to me. I’m not sure how to handle our relationship or what we are anymore. I know he isn’t married and doesn’t plan to be, and works even more than he used to. Sometimes it’s mind boggling to see the difference between him and my real dad. It’s then that I realize, the ideals that Ro
nan taught me aren’t the same ones Blake would’ve taught me, had I gotten the chance to know him earlier in life. And I know that I probably would be a different man if that were the case.

  “Mr. McIntyre? Mr. Gibbons will see you now,” the assistant interrupts my thoughts, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she turns. She’s pretty, but she’s trying too hard to get my attention. I’m not here for that, anyway. I’ve had my fair share of girls over the years who have wanted to date me, but none that made me have that ‘feeling’, the one my dad had told me about. I’m waiting for that, but honestly, I don’t hold out much hope. After everything that the man that said he was my father had done to my actual parents, I’d lost faith that love was in the cards for me. And yes, I know that is ridiculous since my parents are more in love than any two people I’ve ever seen. But seeing it and having it happen to you are two different things. I’m twenty three years old and have about as much desire to have a relationship as I do to step on gum in my brand new dress shoes. I have a goal in mind, and I’m not letting anything derail it.

  I just graduated from college and had applied for this internship months ago, knowing it was a long shot. Everyone wants to work for this firm. Gibbons, Sandes, and Jacobs Design Associates is the most prestigious firm in the nation, with satellite offices in all major cities. But this internship is working with Mr. Gibbons himself in their home office in Denver, Colorado.

  I stand up, smoothing my hands down my crisp grey suit. I’d just talked to my mom and dad on the way in, and their uplifting words float around in my brain. In true parent fashion, they of course said I was the only one good enough for this internship. I’d also gotten to talk to my little sister and brother. I loved those two so much, and now I had a new baby brother as well. We’ve been through a lot in the last five years, but we’re all in a better place now. I have no lasting effects from my near death accident, and I’d used the semester I’d had to forfeit to gear myself up to be the best student I could be. That’s why I’d graduated at the top of my program and gotten my masters. My professors all bet money on me getting this internship, but I don’t count on anything. I know hundreds if not thousands applied for this one coveted position. I’m one talented guy out of many.