by Pentabu
Sometimes I wish she would just come out and tell me what she wants without all the joking…
Merry Christmas, everyone.
Christmas.
2006/12/27 20:40
So.
This year’s Christmas.
As my girlfriend wished, she got her shoes.
On the other hand…
I went out and bought a suit Y-ko would like.
And remember, this is supposed to be my Christmas present we’re talking about.
Oh well, it’s not a big deal.
… A suit Y-ko would like.
This is a surprisingly difficult choice to make.
I’m a student, but I already own several suits.
I got most of them for the purpose of working part-time jobs, and Y-ko really seems to get a kick out of them, which is great, but…
Here comes another suit.
… Even Y-ko can’t wind up being completely thrilled when I end up bringing home another example of the same old thing.
So my plan is simple.
First, run through the items I already have.
Striped? Check.
Black? Check.
Gray? Check.
… I’ve got two buttons, three buttons, and even three buttons extending to the reverse of the flap.
… Huh?
Seems to me like I’ve got all the bases covered…
That means we have a problem.
No matter what I buy, I’ll have something resembling it in my closet already, which means any excitement Y-ko derives from the suit will be minimal.
That’s not a good thing.
That’s a very bad thing.
I even considered going the distance and buying a formal tuxedo.
But…
There’s hardly any call for a student to need a tuxedo.
Even if it does make Y-ko happy,
I have to admit that I hesitate at the thought of dropping a month’s worth of living expenses on an outfit simply for Y-ko’s sake.
So…
… What do I do?
As I wandered around the men’s garments area, mulling over my options,
I saw a term flash into the corner of my eye.
It was…
Three-piece suit.
… Yes.
The combination of a jacket and pants with…
… a vest added to the mix.
Yep.
Could this be the very thing that would capture Y-ko’s heart over any other option?
My choice was made…
December 24, Christmas eve.
At our prearranged meeting spot.
Y-KO: Thanks for waiting… not long, I hope?
ME: No, it’s fine.
… Oh, like I promised, I’m wearing the new suit.
Y-KO: Just what I’ve been waiting for… except for the coat that completely covers it!
ME: Sorry, you’ll just have to wait.
Y-KO: Take that thing off.
ME: It’s too cold!
Y-KO: I’m only kidding… but based on what I can see of your legs, it seems like a pretty normal outfit.
ME: I suppose.
Y-KO: It would have been funny to see you in an all-white suit or something.
ME: … You want me to make a significant investment for the sake of being funny?
Plus, this is a Christmas present, so it’s your money I’m talking about, you know?
Y-KO: You’ve got a point. Let me rephrase that.
It would have been moe to see you in an all-white suit.
ME: … A significant investment for the sake of being moe?
Y-KO: I’d be prepared to throw a few hundred thousand yen down for that.
ME: No hesitation with that answer, huh…
Okay, so I knew to expect that…
I mean, every time I try to work a figure out of her for how much she’s spent on manga and djinshi over the years, the most I can get is a smile and an “I don’t even want to think about it.”
Not that she’d regret even a bit of it, regardless of how big that number was.
… I’m almost a bit jealous of the way she lives.
There’s nothing in my life that I can feel that enthusiastic about…
Y-KO: Well, whatever. Let’s get going.
ME: … Okay.
As we went to the dessert shop for the Christmas cake I had ordered,
I made sure to liberally compliment her on her new shoes, and then we headed back to Y-ko’s house.
Thirty minutes later.
ME: Well, here we are.
Y-KO: … Now get that coat off, Sebas, and let me have a good look at the suit you picked out!
ME: … Well, all right…
I slowly unfastened the coat buttons.
Removed the article that had been covering the upper half of my suit all evening.
It’s showtime.
ME: … Ta-daa!
Y-KO: What? It looks just like any old——?!
She stopped moving.
There was silence.
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
ME: ……
Y-KO: Mr. Sebas.
ME: Yes?
Y-KO: What is that I can see peeking out from between your jacket and your shirt?
ME: Why, that is what we call a vest.
Y-KO: A vest, you say?
ME: Correct.
Y-KO: Meaning, beneath that jacket you are wearing another sleeveless suit.
… Sleeveless suit?
ME: Well… Yes, I suppose you could describe it that way.
Y-KO: … Sebas!
ME: Yes?
Y-KO: I will stomp you to your heart’s content tonight!
ME: What kind of punishment is that!?
Y-KO: It’s a reward, not a punishment!
ME: If you want to reward me, think of something else!
Y-KO: And I’m not going to skimp out on you with heels! I’ll go with full boots, my darling!
ME: That can only result in broken bones.
Y-KO: Oh, don’t worry! The boots are cushioned, so I’ll have plenty of support!
ME: Not yours! I’m talking about my bones!
If you stomp on me with boots, you’re going to crack my bones right in two!
Y-KO: Oh, shut up about that already!
Look——
Just take it off.
ME: B-but what about the cake?
Y-KO: The cake doesn’t matter! Take that jacket off!
Once it’s off, I’d damn well better see an outfit that a real Sebastian would wear!
Hurry, hurry—take it off!
…!
Y-ko’s eyes are glinting with intent!
Y-KO: —Oh, never mind.
ME: … Huh?
…?
Wh-what?
Have I just been spared?
ME: Umm… I don’t have to take it off now?
Y-KO: Correct. I’ve got a better plan.
Y-KO: Ahh… Merry Christmas, me!!
ME: Well, I’m glad you’re happy…
Y-KO: I’m glad to be alive!!
ME: Uhh… cool…
Oh dear…
Her eyes are glittering and sparkling…
—She’s going to be so disappointed…
Once she learns that the back of this vest…
… is just plain lining.
That’s right.
The vest looks crisp and smart when viewed from the front.
But viewed from behind, it’s like this.
… Alas.
She’ll probably be furious… even though it’s not my fault.
If you have a problem with this, take it up with the gentlemen in England…
… I thought silently
as I pulled the jacket off.
Y-KO: Eh-heh-heh… That’s right… Let’s see that… vest…
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
ME: ……
Y-KO: What’s with the back�
��?
ME: … It’s sort of like lining… but that’s how they come.
Y-KO: Why?
ME: Because if the back was of the normal suit material, you’d get extremely muggy with the jacket on top like I just had.
Also, it’s not considered normal protocol to wear just the vest without the jacket.
After all, the gentlemen in England who developed the three-piece suit could never have guessed that there would be people in Japan who would find the vest itself to be “moe.”
Y-KO: … Yes, I see… So that’s why it’s plain lining…
ME: … Y-ko…
Her eyes… They’re dead inside…
Well, she was really excited over the whole thing…
ME: Please cheer up… If there’s anything I can do, just say the word.
Y-KO: ……… Anything…?
ME: Yes. Well, keeping in mind that there are things I can and cannot do…
Y-KO: … All right. Why don’t you get down on all fours over there?
ME: Down on all fours…?
Y-KO: And then wait. I’ll get the heels and boots.
ME: What? What are you going to do?!
Y-KO: Stomp on you.
ME: I thought that was supposed to be a reward!
Y-KO: Nope. I’ve changed my mind.
If I had to call it something, it’d be——misguided rage?
ME: Please, no!
And why am I getting in trouble for buying a three-piece suit just to make her happy?!
Silly Chat From a Silly Couple.
2006/12/29 21:10
So, I realize this story is full of flirting
(in fact, the entire thing may well consist of nothing but us flirting),
but on this update, likely the last for this calendar year, I will unleash a storm of frivolous chat the scale of which has never been seen here before.
So, for your reading pleasure,
a morning conversation between me and Y-ko on a day off.
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep…
I woke up with the usual alarm.
I slowly withdrew my arm from beneath Y-ko’s head and slipped out of the bed.
Y-KO: … Mmm… morning…?
ME: Yep, it’s morning.
Y-KO: Ugh, I’m still so sleepy…
… Doesn’t the old childhood friend usually wake up the protagonist in the morning?
She mumbled from the bed,
“… Kinda sudden, don’t you think?
The childhood friend coming over to wake you up in the morning…
True, it’s an all-too-common pattern in stories.”
ME: … Yeah, I guess that would be the cliché.
Y-KO: Want to try it out?
ME: Try it…?
As seen often in manga, the female friend comes over to wake up her male classmate and pal.
You want us to try out (?) this scene…
In what way would Y-ko wake me up that fits under this mold?
Could be interesting.
Y-KO: I’m going back to sleep, so come back in ten minutes and wake me up like a good friend would.
ME: I have to wake you up?!
Wouldn’t I normally be the protagonist under these circumstances?
Y-KO: Yeah, you got it. Thanks.
ME: … All right… Sure thing. Back in another ten minutes?
Y-KO: Thanks, old pal Sebas… yawn…
And she closed her eyes again.
… Damn! And I love going back to sleep…
… What if she just did this so she could have an excuse to fall back asleep?
Oh well.
Anyway, waking someone up as if you were their best friend…
How to go about doing this?
… Should I wear my school uniform…?
Well, it’s certainly cold enough to justify that.
Ten minutes later,
I was dressed in my button-up high school uniform.
Without any better ideas for how to make this more childhood friendish, I headed toward Y-ko in the bed.
… No really, how should I do this?
I started by sitting at the edge of the bed.
Y-ko always sleeps facing to her right, so of course I sat down facing her directly.
… And she looked so blissfully happy, sleeping there…
I tried caressing her hair.
… No response.
I leaned over and kissed her cheek.
… No response.
ME: Y-ko—
No response.
Y-ko just lay there, eyes closed, breathing slowly.
I continued talking, unperturbed.
ME: —I love you.
…… Silence.
… For an instant, she stopped breathing.
… She’s awake, isn’t she?
You don’t just drop dead asleep like that, ten minutes after being awake.
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
ME: …… Should I say it again?
Y-KO: … No, I heard you.
ME: I love you, Y-ko.
Y-KO: … I know that.
ME: Good morning.
Y-KO: Morning.
ME: … Was that properly in character?
Y-KO: What kind of childhood friend strokes your hair, kisses you, and says he loves you?!
ME: Well, I am wearing my uniform.
Y-KO: That’s not the point!
ME: Okay, I’ll make a note of it.
Y-KO: Start over from elementary school!
And make sure you read a lot more manga back then!
ME: Actually, I wore this style of uniform in elementary school, too.
Y-KO: Wha—?! I don’t know why that’s supposed to be a comeback, but it sounds really cute!
… Anyway.
She’s up and awake now.
ME: You’ll probably want to get into your clothes before you catch a fever.
Those pajamas are pretty sheer.
Y-KO: Hmm, good idea.
She plodded out of bed.
Even with the heater warming up the room, it felt cold.
She shivered visibly.
Y-KO: Brr, it’s so cold… What’s for breakfast?
ME: Laputa toast and boob-growing juice.
* Laputa toast: Toast topped with an egg sunny-side up, as eaten by Pazu and Sheeta in a scene in Laputa: Castle in the Sky. Gobbling up the egg first and eating the toast second is also highly recommended!
Y-KO: Okay, I’ll take a shower first.
Just be ready; don’t cook it yet. I want it as fresh as possible.
ME: Got it.
She headed for the bathroom.
I headed for the kitchen.
But for some reason, she stopped and turned around.
Y-KO: … Hey.
ME: Yes?
Y-KO: …… I love you, too.
ME: … I know.
Y-KO: Oh. Fine, then.
ME: Yep.
I stood in the kitchen still in my uniform.
… So.
Where to go on today’s date…?
As I mulled it over,
I got out the soy milk and started cutting fruit, making preparations for the breast-augmenting elixir.
Thirty minutes later…
Clack went the door of the bathroom.
Y-KO: Heh-heh-heh…
ME: Are you finally… done…?
I turned around,
took in what Y-ko was wearing—and froze.
No, no, no.
Why?
Why—
Why are you wearing your school uniform?!
Okay, yeah, I realize I’m wearing mine, but still—!
What makes you think I want to go out on a date in my high school uniform at this age?!
Y-KO: Oh, come on! You’re wearing yours!
ME: Then I’m taking it off…
Y-KO: No, I want to take it off you!
ME: … Then I want to take yours off you.
Y-KO: Go r
ight ahead.
ME: How shameless! That’s the part where you act modestly!
… Sigh.
Get ready for another long year of being manipulated…
… Am I going to put up with this forever?
Sometimes I wish I could have the upper hand with her.
After all, as soon as the New Year starts—
I’m taking her to meet my parents.
Taking My Girlfriend to Meet My Parents.
2007/01/02 18:40
Happy New Year’s everyone.
So.
Let’s get started with the first update of the year.
It’ll be shorter than usual, but such is life.
My parents are currently living in America due to their work situation.
The transfer came out of the blue last summer,
but they’ve grown used to life over there in the meantime,
and it sounds like they’re quite enjoying themselves.
Last fall,
I received an e-mail from my father.
SUBJECT: Re:
BODY: I’d like to meet your girlfriend sometime. You should bring her here over the holidays. We’ll put up the travel expenses, of course.
Dad
ME: ……
I froze, message open.
… Well, all right, I did have an inkling that this might happen sooner or later.
… But this is a little too far on the “sooner” side, Dad.
I turned around and called out to Y-ko, who was organizing materials on her laptop.
ME: Can I ask you something, Y-ko?
Y-KO: Sure. What’s up?
ME: My parents are asking me to introduce you to them over the New Year.
Y-KO: … Me? Meet them?
ME: That’s right.
Y-KO: … Aren’t your parents in America right now?
ME: Well, yes.
Y-KO: …… Umm.
ME: ……?
Y-KO: There’s one big problem.
ME: Yes?
Y-KO: I don’t know if I can introduce myself in English!
ME: ……… Huh?