by Pentabu
I wonder if other blog writers who have been published in book form feel the same way…
Sumomomo, Momomo.
2007/05/13 23:23
The other day at Y-ko’s house.
—Looks like dinner’s ready.
Better let Y-ko know.
When I headed into her room, she was facing her computer, back to the door.
She was in the same spot when I came over, too.
Must be busy with work…
Is she… humming?
Wait, now she’s singing…
Y-KO: Let’s make a baby .
ME: ………
Y-KO: Tra-la-la-la, lun-lun-lun.
ME: ………
Y-KO: Tra-la-la-la-la-la, loo-loo-loo-loo.
… What did she just say?
What did she sing in that rhythmical manner?
Still unsure whether or not I should comment on what I had just heard,
I reached out and tapped Y-ko’s shoulder from behind.
ME: Umm… Dinner’s ready…
Y-KO: La-la—huh? Oh, thanks.
She pulled the buds out of her ears and turned to me.
… Should I say something now?
…… I guess I probably should.
ME: What were you just singing?
Y-KO: Huh? What? I was singing?
She wasn’t even aware of it?
Well, thank goodness this didn’t happen in the workplace.
ME: … You seemed to be very upbeat about making babies, unless I misheard you…
Y-KO: Oh, that was an anime theme song. I was just watching it.
It’s the Sumomomo, Momomo song. It goes, “Let’s make a baby .
The song is really catchy. You’ll find yourself humming it unconsciously.
ME: Sumo… momomo…?
I don’t really get it.
The only thing I can say is that the lyrics are pretty outrageous.
Is it based on an eroge?
… And hey, I thought you were working
Y-KO: It’s pretty neat. Unfortunately, YouTube’s video quality isn’t that great, so it’s a good thing that Nico Nico Video’s is much better.
ME: Okay… So you were watching anime on a video site.
Y-KO: Yeah. I’ll regret it if I miss a series and it turns out to be a classic, no?
That’s why it’s so handy to have YouTube and Nico Nico Video.
And let me tell you, this Sumomomo, Momomo series is a hidden gem.
ME: A hidden gem, huh?
Y-KO: I only meant to take a little peek, and I ended up blowing through all twenty-two episodes.
ME: Through twenty-two episodes?! At a half hour each episode, that’s… eleven hours?!
Have you been up all night?!
Y-KO: Huh? Yeah, but I took a caffeine drink, so I’m good.
My eyes are wide open, see? So pumped.
ME: You used an all-night caffeinated drink so you could watch anime?!
Even though it takes you coffee just to make it through overtime at work?!
Yikes, your eyes are bloodshot!
Y-KO: Huh? Oh, they are?
Well, I cried a lot after the final episode…
ME: ……
So it has a ridiculous opening song, and it makes you cry?
Never doubt the power of Japanimation, I guess!
Y-KO: And I love opening themes that are insidiously catchy. Let’s make a baby .
ME: Okay, first of all?
Don’t sing that song when we’re eating. I mean, with those lyrics and all…
… So let’s dig in before it gets cold…
—Several days later.
Y-KO: Check it out! I bought Sumomomo, Momomo!
I got all the DVDs and the manga volumes that are out.
ME: I didn’t realize you liked Sumomomo, Momomomo that much!!
Y-KO: One too many mo’s.
ME: And the amount you spend on anime has one too many zeroes!
Y-KO: Touché… whatever. I love mail order, though.
It would be pretty hard to walk out of a store with all those DVDs and books.
ME: … Why? Because it’s embarrassing?
Y-KO: No, it’s heavy. Think of how bulky that would be to carry home.
ME: Oh, so that’s the issue…
Y-KO: What? You’d prefer if I bought them in person?
You’d be the one carrying it on the way home… Trust me, it’s heavy.
ME: What? You mean you were actually being considerate to me?!
Y-KO: Of course. That’s why I ordered them.
Plus, don’t you know that young boys in puberty just love this kind of manga?
ME: …… I’m not sure how I feel about the fact that the manga boys in puberty love happens to be the kind of manga you love… Plus, if you’ve seen the whole series, why do you need the DVDs?
Y-KO: Well, for one thing, the quality is really bad on those video sites.
And the DVD quality is amazing in comparison. Not that I’ve watched these ones yet.
ME: So you’re happy just by purchasing them…
Y-KO: It’s always well and good when you decide to just splurge on a DVD, but you end up watching it only two or three times…
Anyway, you wanna read it? It’s good!
ME: Right…
Y-KO: Look, there’s a pretty girl who pushes her way into the guy’s house and acts as his wife and does everything for him!
Isn’t that like every guy’s ultimate dream? Oh, and, Sebas, I want some hot cocoa.
ME: …… A girl who does everything for the guy… What a dream…
—Why am I always the one doing all the work…?
Of course, I’m still happy with where I am.
Dream.
2007/05/14 15:35
Once again, at Y-ko’s house.
As I lazily gazed at the titles of manga packed into her bookshelf,
I noticed a familiar title: Saikano.
I read it in high school because I heard it was incredibly sad…
But all I really remember was that it was surprisingly sexy.
… Well, er.
I was at that kind of age.
Being unfamiliar with manga of that category, I found this experience very shocking.
Y-KO: Hmm? What’s up?
ME: I’ve read this manga. This one here. That takes me back.
Y-KO: Really? You’ve got good taste, sir.
How was it? Did you cry?
ME: … Well, it was definitely moving.
Y-KO: Hmph. You didn’t cry?
ME: Unfortunately, it didn’t move me to tears.
Y-KO: … You coldhearted brute.
ME: So I’m coldhearted because I didn’t cry over a comic book?
Y-KO: If you don’t cry over this manga, there is something wrong with you as a person!
I’ve read it dozens of times, and I still bawl my eyes out!
ME: I’m just saying, I don’t know if that makes much sense…
Y-KO: In fact, just reading the first chapter now reminds of the finale, and I cry!!
ME: Okay, now I’m positive there’s something wrong with you…
Y-KO: I’ve made up my mind! I’m going to give you a crash course in human emotions!
Soon you’ll be as passionate, heartfelt, and hot-blooded as anyone!
ME: Hot-blooded…?
She makes it sound like my attack power is about to be doubled.
ME: Anyway, how do you decide if a person is passionate or frigid based on their reaction to a manga?
Y-KO: Well, how else are you going to judge?
ME: Actually, I think there are plenty of better ways to determine that…
Y-KO: Like whether or not you give your school lunch to an abandoned puppy on a rainy day?
ME: Uh, wow… That is the corniest, most cliché idea I’ve ever heard…
Y-KO: The problem is, sadly enough, I’ve never run across one of those mangalike situations in real life.
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ME: Can’t say I have, either.
Plus, I thought they forbade taking home school food as a measure against food poisoning.
Y-KO: Also, in my experience, I’ve never run into a pretty girl carrying toast at a blind corner and later found out that she was a transfer student about to start at my school.
… In fact, I’ve never ever seen anyone running with toast in their mouth.
ME: Oh, I’ve run with toast in my mouth before.
Y-KO: Really? While shouting, “I’ll be late, I’ll be late”?
ME: No, it was in a bread-eating race at a school competition.
Y-KO: That’s completely different…
ME: You know, there are lots of things that happen often in manga but never in real life.
Y-KO: True… I’ve never been summoned to an alternate dimension to be a hero.
I’ve never snuck into a military lab and ridden on a secret weapon vehicle to escape.
Even though it was my childhood dream…
If it doesn’t happen soon, then I’m afraid that when it does happen,
I’ll be too late to be the main character age-wise.
I’d have to be the sexy support member.
Heroes and top secret vehicles.
Honestly, if those are the most realistic examples you can come up with…
Doesn’t she have any fantasies that are even remotely plausible?
ME: To be picky, your weight might even exclude you from sexy support staff.
Y-KO: …… Heh-heh-heh.
ME: Ouch, ouch, ouch! Not my ear; that hurts! I’m sorry!
She had dug her nails into my ear.
… It’s kind of a weird sensation…
Oh no. What if I get a taste for it?
Y-KO: But why does the pilot end up being an ordinary, innocent civilian?
And of course, the rival ends up being the main character’s childhood friend.
ME: I’m sure they just used that to make the story exciting.
Y-KO: By coincidence, the civilian protagonist’s colony is attacked.
By coincidence, the attacker is his friend; by coincidence, he gets in a combat vehicle; and by coincidence, he happens to have a special power—
ME: Gundam SEED, right?
Y-KO: —It’s an amazing setup.
The love that blossomed between the two enemies, Kira and Athrun, was so passionate.
ME: Kira and Athrun…?
I thought the romances were between Kira and Lacus and Athrun and Cagalli.
… Isn’t that right, Y-ko?
ME: You seem to have accepted the coincidences fairly readily…
Y-KO: Well, it was coincidence that brought us together, too.
It’s a wonderful thing!
ME: ……
I wish she would have used the word fate…
Oh well, not that it matters.
Y-KO: Man, I wish I could ride a Gundam, even if it has to be by coincidence.
ME: Your fantasies seem to have a very masculine edge to them.
Heroes, Gundam pilots, and so on. Don’t you have any feminine desires?
I doubt she imagines herself working in a bakery or a patisserie.
… But if she does have them… what would they be?
Y-KO: Hmm? What, you want girlish ideas?
Of course, I’m like any girl. I’ve imagined that I was a princess in a past life.
ME: A princess, huh? Well, it’s definitely more girly than Gundam.
Y-KO: And in that past life, the hero came into my life.
ME: And you lived happily ever after?
Y-KO: No. That hero in the past life (male) and the evil sorcerer (male) experienced a burning, forbidden love… which I spied upon from the shadows.
ME: Wow, that’s some epic BL! But if that was the case, where’s the necessity for you to be a princess in your past life?
Y-KO: Silence, Sebas. There’s no point to having a past life if I’m not the main character.
But then again, speaking of heroes…
ME: …? What is it?
Y-KO: I get the feeling that in your past life, you were more of a Sebas than a hero.
In fact, I’m positive that you served my noble household.
ME: … So I’ve been stuck in the same position since my previous life…?
Should I be pleased that I at least haven’t been paired with the evil sorcerer (male)?
… But I digress. I see now that it’s been my fate to serve this person since my prior life.
Past life, present life, and I’d put good money down that in my future life I will be Sebas as well.
…… Huh? Strange, I feel happy about that?
Y-KO: But enough about me. What about you?
Don’t you think about that stuff? Outside of being a superhero.
ME: Would you please just drop that topic, already? Please…
But of course, I have thought about that stuff before.
Y-KO: I see. Please, elaborate.
ME: … For example… Let’s see, like going out with an older lady and being cooked some delicious food.
Y-KO: …… Ack.
ME: Maybe going out with a mature lady and doing this… and that?
… Of course, that wasn’t all that long ago. In fact, I think of it often these days…
Y-KO: …… Wh-what?
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
—I was so young in those days…
Y-KO: What? Excuse me… What’s the deal?! Are you saying this is my fault?!
Trouble Descends.
2007/05/16 21:20
I finished buying the groceries for dinner and returned to Y-ko’s place.
After opening the door with the spare key, I was met with the sight of Y-ko
frozen in the Kamehameha position.
—Awkward.
This really feels awkward.
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……
ME: … What are you doing?
Y-KO: Ha… ha-ha-ha. You caught me in an embarrassing situation.
And laughing shyly, she pulled the earphones out.
… Watching anime on her computer again, I see.
ME: … Dragon Ball this time?
Y-KO: Grr, how can you tell?!
ME: Well, it was pretty obvious from the pose.
Y-KO: … I was watching the scene where Gohan shows Videl how to float, and I thought I might be able to do it, too.
ME: Well, I can understand the intention…
Y-KO: So I was just making a “wouldn’t it be nice to fly” kind of pose… see?
ME: See? See what…?
Plus, that was clearly the Kamehameha pose.
I think you’d be dismayed at the results of pulling off one of those in your room.
Y-KO: Oh, come on. Of course I can’t shoot a Kamehameha. Are you that dumb?
ME: ……
Y-KO: ……?
She called me dumb.
Someone who was just making the Kamehameha pose in her room called me dumb.
… If I had Saiyan blood running in my veins,
I would have gone Super Saiyan after that comment.
Y-KO: Videl is really quite the tsundere, by the way.
ME: Oh.
Y-KO: To think, a character that fits my aesthetic vision perfectly, made over a decade ago!
Never underestimate the power of Akira Toriyama. I’ve made up my mind!
From now on, I want to be just like Videl.
ME: … As long as it doesn’t cause me grief, I’m all for it.
Y-KO: Of course it won’t cause you grief. It’ll be fine.
But all of that aside, Sebas…
ME: Yes?
Y-KO: I want you to strike the Great Saiyaman pose.
ME: What kind of harassment is this?!
Look at that, a whole wheelbarrow full of grief!
Y-KO: Uh, you can do his f… foo… hyoo…
hyoojon form.
ME: Wrong! It’s pronounced “fusion,” not “hyoojon.”
Y-KO: That’s what I said, fusion. Do it.
ME: No. Plus, I don’t want to bother the people downstairs.
Y-KO: Okay, fine. Do it in midair.
ME: I can’t! Only anime people can fly!
And what the hell is with this obsession today?!
Y-KO: I got an e-mail from your mother today.
ME: ……… And?
Y-KO: I hear that at the elementary school talent festival, you and a friend struck the fusion pose.
ME: Ah… ah…
Mom……
You are ruining my life……
How could you tell her about that?
It’s so embarrassing, I’d managed to forget the whole thing, but you just had to go and tell her, of all people…
Y-KO: Fusion in front of the entire student body. What a gutsy move.
ME: Well, what else should I have done? Dragon Ball was all the rage back then…
We put lots of Shnen Jump jokes into our script for laughs…
And I was also the only person who was the right height compared to the other person.
Y-KO: Wow, you even had the heights figured out…
I bet I could get along great with the person who wrote your script.
… Oh, but that’s not all I heard about.
Apparently, when you were in kindergarten, you practiced in front of the mirror, trying to move faster than your reflection.
ME: ……
… Mom…
Have I done something to make you hate me?
Y-KO: And when dinner came around, you told your dad,
“I moved faster than the mirror! Will I be a superhero now?”
ME: ……
Y-KO: Oh, would you stop slumping on all fours on the floor?
That’s not the pose I was asking for. Great Saiyaman or fusion pose only, please.
Sigh…
I haven’t seen Y-ko having this much fun in ages!
Dammit!
Why do I feel such despair?!
Y-KO: Man… This is all much too cute.
Why didn’t you tell me about your adorable past?
ME: Why would anyone willingly drudge up their embarrassing past?
Y-KO: Oh, you rascal. Big sister’s very proud of you.
You were such a little sweetheart!