Key to Redemption

by Talia Gryphon

  Now with her in his arms, her eyes moist with joy as she looked at his improved but masked face, he spoke softly to her in French. “Ne pleure pas, ma bien-aimée, s’il vous plaît . . .” “Do not cry, sweetheart, please.”

  Seeing her feelings exposed brought every protective male instinct clamoring to life. Tough, commanding, honorable, intelligent and gentle of heart, she was all woman, the best there was of her gender, in his opinion.

  “Okay,” Gillian choked out, trying to laugh and keep things lighter. The tears did not quite spill over. She was so proud of him. Now he truly had a chance at a possible normal life and she knew he intended to be strong and take it.

  “I’m just so proud of you, is all, Perrin. You’ve come so remarkably far. I just wish you every wonderful thing imaginable.”

  A gentle, elegant hand rose as Perrin caught a tear shimmering on her lashes with his knuckle, smiling affectionately down at his little therapist. “Merci, Gillian.” He inclined his head to her. “Tu as toujours besoin qu’on prenne soin de toi, ma bien-aimée,” he murmured in his lovely deep, musical voice, cupping her chin in his hand.

  “What?” Gillian said, wiping her eyes and smiling.

  “I said, ‘You still need looking after, sweetheart.’ ” He chuckled as she went from vulnerable to affronted in the blink of an eye.

  “Do not start that shit again, Perrin. Just go have a good life. Worry about yourself for a change.”

  Gillian reached around and swatted his butt, winking at him as she turned and went out the door. That single sexy ebony eyebrow arched and he shook his finger at her, his rich laughter following. “Tu es une petite peste, mon ange. Until tomorrow, ma chérie.”

  That brought an inelegant snort from Aleksei. Perrin watched as the Vampire Lord linked hands with Gillian and walked off into the darkness.

  “Do you think I might have you to myself this evening, cara?” Aleksei asked, pulling her under the shelter of his shoulder.

  “Maybe,” Gillian said happily, “if you tell me what he just called me.” She was fairly skipping over Perrin’s triumph.

  “He said you were a ‘little brat’ . . . ‘angel.’ ” He emphasized the last word, looking at her skeptically as she laughed, unsure if she really was all right. He decided to change the subject.

  “Tomorrow you see him off, then you will bring back your mentor?” Aleksei slowed his pace, wanting just to spend time with her in the moonlight.

  “Yes.” She altered her stride to match his. “Cassiopeia is coming in as Perrin is leaving. Wait till you meet her, she’s a hoot.”

  “I cannot wait. If she is a friend of yours and taught you all she knows, we are in for a few days of excitement,” he said dryly, earning him a poke in the ribs.

  “Hey, you don’t seem to complain too much about my knowledge and skill level.” Gill gave him a sidelong glance. “In fact, I think you’ve benefited more than once.”

  “Indeed I have, piccola.” Aleksei laughed. It felt good just to be with her with nothing pressing at the moment. He was still charged with energy after the miracle of the evening and wanted to expend it doing pleasant things.

  Suddenly he stopped and turned to pull her more tightly to him. “Fly with me tonight, Gillian.”

  “Um . . . I’m not quite equipped, if you haven’t noticed.”

  Smiling, he stepped back from her. His outline wavered, then expanded. Before her was his dragon form—sleek black scales glittering with iridescent color in the moonlight. The massive head dipped and turned toward its back, ice gray eyes shining against the dark scales. The leathery wing folded farther against the lustrous back muscles, the forelimb and shoulder lowered in invitation.

  Gillian laughed and clambered on board. As soon as she was seated and had a firm hold on the silky hair that grew along the heavily plated neck, the great beast moved. It took two galloping, undulating leaps then the immense wings pumped once, launching into flight. She suppressed a shriek and held on. Aleksei wouldn’t drop her; she trusted him, felt safe with him.

  As soon as the thought crossed her mind, she frowned. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Consorting with fanged friends of all sorts, sex therapist to the preternatural.

  She remembered a less than flattering news article or two when she’d first started out as a Paramortal psychologist. The IPPA had picked her as sort of their unofficial poster girl for the up-and-coming field and all that it implied.

  Gillian had found herself at the center of an ever-widening gulf. Humans in general were divided sharply in the recognition of the Paramortals as beings. She’d gone public with rousing support for the affirmative side and had helped bring about some swift, positive changes in everyone’s thinking. Anyone with emotional pain was entitled to her undivided attention and skill; it didn’t matter if they used to be alive or not, or if they’d recently gained the ability to grow fur. She even opened her doors to the Sidhe, the Elves and most of the dwellers of Faerie. All notoriously resistive to the idea of a Human having the skills necessary to help them out of their respective funks.

  Gill reminded everyone very publicly that her crack unit in the USMC was made up of only three Humans. The rest were Paramortals who performed heroic acts daily in order to protect the very people who were bitching about them. That was when she’d stopped seeing Human clients altogether. The decision had cut into her income, but it was the principle of the matter.

  Because of her bold moves, more therapists, counselors, psychologists and psychiatrists came out of the proverbial closet and admitted to having been treating “the others” all along, since before legalization and recognition. It had been a crowning victory for the IPPA, its fellows, the Marines and Gillian.

  It was also what brought her to the attention of Aleksei Rachlav in the first place. Now, good grief, she was like his . . . his girlfriend or something.

  “You are not my girlfriend. You broke up with me,” Aleksei reminded her in her mind.

  “We. Are. On. A. Break. And get the hell out of my thoughts.” Gillian seethed right back. Chuckling to himself, Aleksei dipped a shoulder midflight, making her wobble and clutch more tightly to him.

  “I am taking my ex-girlfriend on a moonlight flight so that we may enjoy the stars and the moon together.”

  She kicked him in the ribs for being a wiseass, and he rewarded her by swirling lazily around, then nose-diving for a large, ruined castle. Gillian gritted her teeth and held on, knowing he was playing with her. At the last moment, the medieval beast backwinged and brought them lightly to the ground. Aleksei waited until she climbed down and was far enough away before shifting back to his tall, dark and stunning self.

  “Now what?” Gillian was looking at him, half provocatively, half challengingly. He took a moment to admire her.

  “You are quite lovely, bellissima.” The voice held both humor and heat. Icy gray eyes raked her up and down as he circled her like a shark, his intentions obvious from the smoldering gaze to the thickening outline down his thigh.

  “Haven’t you had enough tonight?” She folded her arms and stood at parade rest, refusing to take the bait.

  He didn’t give her a chance to breathe before he moved with blurring speed, capturing her in his arms and crowding her up against the wall of the derelict structure. Pinning her against the stone gently, he plied his fingers through her silky hair. Leaning over her, he brushed his lips across hers, a butterfly’s touch. “There is never enough of you, dolcezza .”

  Eyes flashing, she shoved at his shoulders. “Down, boy!”

  Aleksei heard the laughter bubbling beneath her words. “As you wish, my lady.”

  Using one of her own fighting tricks, he hooked a boot behind her ankle and yanked. Catching her deftly, he rolled as she fell so that he took the brunt of the impact. Gillian wound up on top, looking into bemused silvery eyes.

  “One of these days I am going to shoot you just on principle,” she said, laughing.

  “I doubt that, piccola.” He captured her f
ace in his hands and brought her down to kiss her. His hands ran down her back to cup her butt and pull her tighter against him.

  “You do not want to damage your favorite plaything.”

  He meant it as a joke, but Gillian’s eyes clouded briefly. “Aleksei, you have never been a plaything.”

  Realizing his mistake, Aleksei backtracked. “Please, innamorata , let us not be so sensitive with each other. We have never had a problem communicating before, Gillian. Tonight was a very special, extraordinary experience. I do not want to fight with you. I was joking as you so often do but I do not appear to have your strategic timing.”

  She looked down at him. He hadn’t moved. His arms were still tightly around her, one hand cupping her butt, his keen eyes watching for any shift in her face. He looked beautiful lying there on the ground, his black hair blending with the grass on the mountainside. Shit, she was being overly sensitive.

  “Sorry, I’m a little touchy, I guess.”

  “Nothing to worry about, piccola. Now kiss me.”

  Smiling, she figured he was right—there was no reason to debate the issue further so she kissed him. The sudden heat that had lingered in her pelvis since the healing intensified and she squirmed against him, straddling him and locking his hips between her knees.

  Aleksei responded to her instantly, his own groin still full and heavy. Tongues dueled as he enjoyed being able to kiss her unhurriedly, running his hands up to tangle in her hair then sending one down her back, feeling the solid muscle of her form. The heat between them rose and their bodies pressed tight, needing to find solace in each other.

  Moving her hands around his shoulders, Gillian pulled his upper body tightly to hers and sat him up with her on his lap. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and they pressed together, grinding against the clothing that separated them. Aleksei groaned, rolling them so they were head and shoulders upward on the incline of the slope and Gillian was beneath him.

  She shifted her hips as his large warm hands unfastened her pants, pulling them away. Her own hands were busy unlacing his velvet ties, freeing him from the tight confines of the soft black material. Aleksei shuddered as she caressed his length, and he tucked a hand under her hip, tilting her to receive him.

  “Guide me inside, piccola.” His voice was magical, pure silky sex, and she felt her body respond with a fresh wetness as she positioned him at her opening. Reaching up, she took his head, drawing him into a kiss.

  He started to enter her, then froze as she gasped in pain, lifting his head from the kiss to stare at her, silvery eyes wide in surprise.

  “Gillian . . . ?”

  Frustrated, she frowned and tried to push upward onto his shaft. “Ow!”

  That hurt. What the hell?! It never hurt.

  “Easy, tesora.” Aleksei was frowning too, but a niggling idea was clawing at the back of his thoughts. “Relax, and let me see what the problem is.”

  Experimentally, he withdrew completely from her, then lightly flexed his hips forward again. Gillian gasped, “Ow! Damn! Why would this hurt all of a sudden?”

  Confusion was plainly on her face. Gently, he pulled back, resting on his hip, and softly probed her with a long finger. Gillian watched him carefully, feeling his examination of her. He was being extremely tentative and gentle, but she felt the same pressure as she had when he’d tried to enter her.

  “Aleksei? What is it?”

  He knew then. He’d felt a resistance when she’d yelped. His fingers confirmed it. He knew what the problem was and it suddenly made sense.

  “I do not know if this is good news or bad news, but it seems our healing affected all of us more than we realized.”

  Now he was looking at her again, part amusement, part something else in his eyes. He pulled away from her and tucked himself back inside his velvet pants.

  “Goddammit, what is it?” Gillian was thoroughly confused and getting pissed off. She wanted to boink Aleksei’s brains out, and having sex that hurt was not on her agenda.

  “You seem to have regained what you lost a long time ago.” Aleksei leaned over and retrieved her pants, handing them to her as he rose and lifted her from the ground.

  “What the fuck are you talking about? What did I lose?”

  “Your virginity, dolcezza.” The smile he gave her wasn’t mocking; it was sweet and tender.

  He wasn’t making fun of her, but it took a moment for what he said to sink in. “My virgini—You mean . . . ?”

  “Indeed I do. You are intact once more.”

  Her eyes went wide as she made the same connection he had. “Oh shit! That is not funny!”

  “No, it is not, but it is a fact.” Aleksei took her pants away from her and held them out for her to step into.

  “Wait, what are you doing? Don’t you want to finish what we started?” Gillian looked at him, realizing that the Little Transylvanian Train that she wanted to ride was locked up behind Aleksei’s relaced pants.

  Aleksei’s eyebrow rose and he scolded her lightly, “Cara mia, you are a virgin. I realize that until a few hours ago you were not, but now you are. I will not have sex with you out here, in the grass. It is not right.”

  “Have you lost your mind?” She stared at him, more than a little annoyed. “What difference does that make? We’ve been having sex for months now, just do it and get it over with!”

  “Gillian Key, I am astonished!” he reprimanded her. “I do not know what your first experience was like, but I do not take a virgin out into such an unromantic place for her deflowering. This is something that deserves courting and the proper atmosphere. Now please put your pants back on so I may take you home.”

  “My first experience was at three o’clock in the morning on a deserted construction site when I was eighteen,” she snapped, still coming to terms with where this had degenerated to. “I can’t believe you are stopping in the middle of sex because I grew back an insignificant piece of flesh thanks to Perrin and his musical mojo!”

  She grabbed her pants and put them on herself. When she straightened, he was looking at her. “What? What did I say now?”

  Aleksei was nearly speechless, hands on hips, glaring down at her. “Il Perrin aveva ragione, lei potrebbe usare del raddrizzare fuori, piccola,” he said under his breath in Italian. In English he snapped, “Are you ready?”

  “Not until you tell me what the hell is bothering you and what you just said about Perrin.” She stared back at him, just as stubborn.

  “Il damn di dio esso!” he swore, raking his hand through his hair. “I said, ‘Perrin is correct, you need to be straightened out on a number of things, piccola.’ ”

  “Such as?”

  “Gillian, being the first man to be with a young woman is a special thing for them both. I want to treat you as I would have treated you if I truly had been your first lover. Why is that so hard for you to understand? Will you not allow me to treat you with the respect this situation deserves? Like the woman I love?

  “Must you always be the brash Marine and make light of something that could be so exceptional for us both? This is a miracle for you, cuore dolce, your own sort of rebirth. Do you want to just give it away to a Vampire you have already broken up with on a mountainside or would you like it to be a beautiful, special event?”

  Gillian had stopped listening when he’d dropped the L word again, her insides tightening with nervousness. Dammit, dammit! Did she want that? Did she want to have this “special” moment with him? How far and deep would that tie them together in his eyes? Would she be betraying him if she just found someone to have sex with if he wouldn’t? No, she couldn’t do that. She was fine with her sexuality but she wasn’t just going to pick up someone to get laid. Shit and double shit.

  What had he just said? Broken up . . . oh yeah. “We are on a break! Just like Ross and Rachel!” she retorted. “And isn’t it up to me where I lose my cherry and to whom?”

  The moment she said it, she realized her mistake. Something dark and heartbreaking fl
ickered across his perfect features. The silvery eyes dulled for a moment, then lightened to nearly white ice. He straightened to his full height, invisible walls almost audibly clanging down.

  Whoa, she felt that, even without her empathy switched on. She had hurt him, deeply. Great. This was just getting better and better. Vaguely she wondered how badly it would hurt to cut out her tongue before she did any more damage.

  Amazingly, Aleksei spoke first. “My apologies, Gillian. I presumed too much. Of course it is your choice as to who will be the honored man, and when it will happen.”

  He turned away from her. “Perhaps Perrin would oblige if you are in a hurry to get on with it.”

  Ouch. That hurt, but she really couldn’t blame him. “Perrin has nothing to do with this.”

  “Neither do I, apparently,” he said softly, still with his back to her.

  Gillian had half a dozen smart-assed remarks ready to fire, but his last comment completely disarmed her. Shit, all they’d done was argue for the past couple of months. No, scratch that. All she’d done was argue. Aleksei had been pretty decent, after he’d redeemed himself for his negative interpretation of her job as a sex therapist. Hell, he’d even taken Perrin under his wing, literally. And she really did lo . . . lov . . . um, like him a lot. Not going to go there, dammit.

  Swearing under her breath, she kicked a clump of grass, then moved closer and put her hand on his arm. “Look, I’m sorry and I’m not trying to pick a fight. I would be honored if you could be my . . . first.”

  Aleksei looked down at her, his eyes boring into her, but he could feel no duplicity, no reservations. Sincere feeling was in her lovely green eyes, and it moved him. She was trying. She was just unbelievably blunt and said what was on her mind. Maybe working on the filter from her brain to her mouth would be in order.

  “I do not want to pressure you nor fight with you either. I was only trying to think of your feelings, cara. To give you a lovely romantic evening as you should have had in the first place rather than just ‘doing it’ as you said. That was my reasoning for refusing you right now, nothing more,” he said earnestly, taking her hands as he turned back to face her.