Pas de Deux

by M. J. Duncan

  Addison laughed. “Me too.”

  Mallory balanced the carrying tray that held hers and Addison’s coffees and celebratory pastries against her stomach as she slipped her sunglasses back into place. They had wrapped their final performance in Los Angeles the night before, and she was looking forward to surprising Addison with breakfast in bed before they set about enjoying a lazy day lounging around the hotel’s rooftop pool before their flight home tomorrow. She adjusted her grip on their morning treats as she eased the shop’s door open with her shoulder, and smiled when a hand reached in to hold the door for her. “Cheers, mate.”

  “Mallory.”

  Mallory’s heart stopped beating at the painfully familiar sound of that voice murmuring her name. But it didn’t make sense. Gwen couldn’t be in Los Angeles. She was supposed to be in Europe with the rest of LA Phil for the final leg of the summer tour. Hell, knowing that Gwen was thousands of miles away had been the only thing that had allowed her to breathe easy the whole time she’d been back in Los Angeles.

  There was a hesitant smile on Gwen’s lips as she met Mallory’s stunned gaze. “Um, surprise?” she said weakly. “I’m sorry for ambushing you like this. I just…can we maybe talk, you know, for a minute or something?” She tilted her head imploringly.

  Mallory grit her teeth as she stared disbelievingly at Gwen. Her first impulse was to brush past her with a curt, no fucking way, but there was something in the way Gwen’s shoulders bowed, as if preparing to be rebuffed, that made her relent with a terse nod. Even now, it seemed, she could not find it in herself to deny Gwen what she wanted.

  “Thank you,” Gwen breathed. She motioned toward an empty table just inside the door. “Would you like to sit, or…?”

  Mallory’s hands were starting to shake as the reality of the situation that should not have been happening began to sink in, and she didn’t trust herself to remain calm enough not to drop the coffees onto the sidewalk. She turned and abruptly made her way back inside the coffee shop. “What are you doing here?” Mallory asked brusquely as she set the cardboard carrying tray onto the nearest table. She was glad, at least, that her voice didn’t tremble. She pushed her sunglasses back up onto the top of her head as she sat down. “You should be in Brussels.”

  “I flew back into town last night,” Gwen explained as she took her seat across the table from Mallory. “Dana’s due any day now, so they gave me leave to come home so I’d be here when she goes into labor.”

  “That’s…” Quick, Mallory thought. Hell, it wasn’t even a full year ago that the video of Gwen’s symphony debut and proposal hit the internet, and they were already expecting a child? And, more than that… “I didn’t know you wanted children.”

  “I didn’t think I did, either,” Gwen agreed with a little shrug. “But last September we were at the beach with Luke and Jay, enjoying the last bit of summer. Dana pointed to this little girl digging near the water, and said something about how she couldn’t wait to bring our kids to the beach and teach them how to build sandcastles and surf. And I just… All of a sudden I realized that I wanted that.”

  “With her.”

  “Yes.” Gwen ducked her head. “It was supposed to take a few tries for the IVF to take, but it worked on the first try, so…yeah.”

  “And you chased me down to tell me this?”

  “No, I…” Gwen shook her head. Her eyes shone with remorse as she looked up through her lashes and added, “When I found out you were still here, I just felt like I needed to find you and apologize again for the way things ended between us. And I guess I wanted to see if you were okay. I handled everything so badly that night, and I’m so, so sorry—”

  “It’s fine, Gwen,” Mallory interrupted. Then, more softly, “Really, I’m fine. I wasn’t at first, but I am now.” She took a deep breath and held it for a moment before letting it go, using the time to consider whether or not it was worth wading back into these muddy waters. A couple of months ago she wouldn’t have, but now she realized that she had truly moved on. Besides, in the end, she knew that if she didn’t bring it up now that she’d always wonder, so she asked, “Do you know what hurt the most though? Aside from the cheating and the lying and everything else?”

  Gwen seemed to shrink in her seat as she asked in a quiet voice, “What?”

  “I had no idea you wrote music.” Mallory shook her head. “You wrote a fucking beautiful symphony, and I had no bloody idea…” Her voice trailed off as emotion tightened her throat, and she swallowed thickly to clear it so she could ask, “Was I truly that awful? That you felt you had to hide that part of yourself from me?”

  “No!” Gwen’s hands shot across the table to cover hers, and it took Mallory everything she had to not pull away. “No, Mal. It wasn’t anything like that.”

  “Then why?” Mallory hated the way her voice cracked, but was glad that the tears she could feel welling up stayed put.

  “I didn’t…” Gwen sighed. “It was just something I messed around with when my head was too full and I needed to relax. It wasn’t just you—I didn’t tell anyone about it.”

  “And yet…”

  “And yet,” Gwen agreed. “Dana came over to the house unexpectedly one day, and I’d had my papers spread over the coffee table. She asked what it was, so I had to tell her because it was right the hell there, and then she just randomly kept asking about it. You know, asking how it was going, if I’d play a bit for her, stuff like that. I never expected to actually finish the damn thing, but eventually I did, and then she said something to Luke about it, and he mentioned it to Rhode, and it just snowballed. I honestly hadn’t planned on it being a thing, but all of a sudden it was and I just kind of buckled in for the ride.”

  Mallory bit her lip as she looked at the woman she had once loved with her whole, imperfect heart. Maybe it was the rambling explanation, or the way Gwen’s eyes were open and honest and begging to be believed, but Mallory found that she did believe her. And, more than that, she felt she could forgive her now. In the end, the only thing that mattered was that they were both where they belonged. She let her lip slip from her teeth as she turned her hands to return Gwen’s hold. “It is a beautiful piece of music. I’m glad you found the courage to share it with the world.”

  “Thank you.” Gwen squeezed her hands. “I haven’t seen it yet, of course, but rumor has it that your ballet is incredible, too. I was so surprised when I heard you were collaborating with the Royal Ballet.”

  “It was too good of an opportunity to pass up,” Mallory confessed. “To work with Nina Devereaux, who kept drilling me on it until I got it right, and with Addy, who’s the perfect partner…”

  Gwen smiled. “She’s a beautiful dancer.”

  “She is. And she’s an even more wonderful human being. She’s…she’s everything I never knew I needed.”

  “She makes you happy?”

  Mallory nodded. “Very happy.”

  “I’m glad.”

  Mallory smiled. “Me too.” Making peace with her past was nice, but she had left her future back at the hotel and her heart was suddenly racing with the need to hurry back to it. She murmured apologetically, “I’m sorry, but I should be getting back. I left a note, but Addy is going to worry that something’s happened to me if I linger much longer.”

  “Of course.” Gwen pulled her hands away as she got to her feet. “Thank you for talking to me.”

  “Thank you for searching me out.”

  “You mean ambushing you? Yeah, totally,” Gwen laughed. She smoothed her hands over her thighs and tilted her head as she added, “May I…hug you goodbye?”

  Mallory nodded and opened her arms, and her eyes fluttered shut as Gwen sank into her. They held each other for a long moment, and Mallory couldn’t resist brushing a kiss over the soft spot in front of Gwen’s ear as she pulled away. “Goodbye, Gwen.”

  “Goodbye, Mal,” Gwen whispered, her eyes gentle and warm with the peace they had finally won.

  With nothing left to s
ay, Mal smiled at Gwen as she picked up the cardboard tray with hers and Addy’s coffees. They would probably need to be reheated by the time she walked the two blocks to their hotel. Hang on, there were dozens of hotels in downtown Los Angeles, so how… “Wait a second. How did you find me?”

  Gwen chuckled sheepishly and shoved her hands into the back pockets of her shorts. “I had someone in the front office at Phil look into it for me. When they gave me the name of the hotel where the LSO was staying, and I didn’t find you there, I remembered how much you liked the coffee here. I almost turned around when I saw you coming out… I didn’t know if you’d want to even see me, but I needed to try. For both of us.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Any time, Mal. Be happy.”

  Mallory smiled and lifted her tray of coffee in farewell. “You too.”

  The walk from the coffee shop to the hotel was a blur of cars and sunshine and more people than should have been walking around downtown Los Angeles. She tapped her foot anxiously as she waited for the lift that would take her up to their floor. She could hear the television through the door as she tapped her key to the lock, and her heart lodged itself in her throat as she stepped inside. “Sorry, darling,” she apologized as she set the tray with their drinks onto the small desk beside the dresser that held the television. “I had every intention of getting back before you woke up.”

  “It’s fine,” Addison hummed as she stretched beneath the downy white comforter. Her skin was bronzed from days spent soaking up the sun both in Australia and here, and something inside Mallory settled as she stared at her. “Your note said you’d be right back.”

  Mallory smiled as she left their drinks on the desk and crawled onto the bed. “I love you,” she swore as she dipped her head to capture Addison’s lips in a slow, sweet kiss. “So much.”

  “Love you, too,” Addison murmured as her hands worked beneath the hem of Mallory’s tee and began pulling it off. “But you have way too many clothes on if you’re going to be in bed with me.”

  Mallory laughed and continued to lavish Addison’s lips with as many kisses as she could while she undressed her, and she sighed happily as she kicked the comforter off the foot of the bed and stretched out on top of her. “Better?”

  “So much better,” Addison confirmed, her voice deliciously rough as she tangled a hand in Mallory’s hair and guided their lips together.

  Kissing Addison was wonderful, but Mallory forced herself to pull away so she could tell her, “I saw Gwen just now. At the coffee shop.” She hated the way Addison stilled beneath her, but she had promised herself that she would never keep anything important from her and, well, running into her ex certainly fell into that category. She started to pull away because this seemed like more of a sitting up type of conversation, but a firm hand on the small of her back held her in place.

  Addison slid her hand from Mallory’s hair to gently cradle her face as she asked, “Are you okay?”

  “I am.” Mallory smiled and brushed her lips over Addison’s. “It was unexpected, of course, but, at the same time…it was nice.” She kissed her again. “Loving you helped me get to a point where I didn’t particularly need that closure anymore, but I feel like it’s all properly settled now, if that makes sense.”

  “You feel free.”

  Mallory nodded. “And blessed to have you in my life. You are everything in the world to me, Addison. I love you so very, very much.”

  “Love you more,” Addison teased as she lifted her head to capture Mallory’s lips in a sweet kiss.

  “That’s just not possible, darling,” Mallory countered as she pinned Addison back against the bed and endeavored to do her very best to show her with soft touches and reverent kisses just how much she cherished her

  The phone on the bedside table exploding to life just as she bit Addison’s hipbone was a most unwelcome distraction, but the hand in her hair urging her downward was all the encouragement she needed to ignore it. They both sighed with relief when the ringing finally stopped, but when the phone started up again, Mallory swore, “I’m going to kill him.”

  “Not if I beat you to it,” Addison replied as she rolled to grab the handset that would undoubtedly keep ringing until they answered. “Really bad timing Will.”

  Mallory was debating continuing with what she was doing despite Addison holding the phone to her ear, when Addison sat up and held the phone out to her with a half-strained, half-amused, “He says it’s important.”

  Mallory rolled her eyes as she relented and reached for the phone. “What do you want, Will?” she demanded as she pushed Addison back down onto the bed. She was not finished ravishing her yet, and she’d be damned if even her best friend’s impeccably awful timing ruined this for her.

  “Well, a merry good morning to you, too, darling!” Will replied in an annoyingly chipper, sing-song voice.

  “Sod off.”

  He laughed. “Are you always this cheerful in the morning? How does Addison put up with you?”

  “Addison wakes me up a hell of a lot more nicely than ringing my bloody phone off the hook,” Mallory told him as she dipped her head to tease Addison’s nipple with the tip of her tongue.

  “I bet she does,” he drawled.

  Mallory nuzzled Addison’s breast and hummed at the feeling of long, long fingers tugging at her hair. “Seriously, mate, what do you want?”

  “For you and your beautiful girlfriend to roll your arses out of bed and get down here. Since Max and Clara are playing nice with the Phil higher-ups building international professional goodwill or whatever, we’ve decided we’re going to spend our last day in California enjoying this ridiculously warm weather and amazing sunshine. So grab your bathing suit and sunscreen, fearless leader. It’s family day, and you and Addy are coming with us whether you want to or not.”

  “Oh really?” Now it was her turn to laugh. She winked at Addison as she added, “What if we have something else planned?”

  She could practically hear his smirk in the silence that crackled over the line before he replied, “I’ve got twenty musicians down here with me, and we will absolutely storm the corridor outside your room with our instruments and play the loudest, most annoying music we can think of until you come out.” His laugh was positively demonic as he added, “Todd is really liking the idea of that, by the way.”

  Mallory pursed her lips to keep from smiling in spite of her annoyance. Of course the tuba player would be looking forward to making an insane amount of noise. “And then everyone in the rooms around us will complain to the front desk, and you lot will be forced to stop.”

  “In a normal situation, yes,” he conceded. “But as I’m calling from the hotel manager’s phone and she’s trying very hard to not laugh her arse off at all of this, I think we’ll win this round. Up and at ‘em, Collingswood. The bus we hired will be here in thirty minutes, so that means you have exactly that much time and not a minute longer to get down to the lobby before we force you out.”

  “I hate you.”

  “You love me,” he countered, complete with a smackeroo kiss to the phone. “See you soon!”

  “I need a new best friend,” Mallory grumbled as she hung up the phone.

  “I’ll be your best friend,” Addison murmured as she arched her chest toward Mallory’s mouth.

  Mallory smiled and gave her nipple a playful bite. “You are my everything, darling.”

  “Ditto,” Addison moaned. “What did Will want?”

  “To inform us that we are going to the beach, apparently. And that the bus he arranged will be downstairs in thirty minutes.”

  “And I’m guessing from your half of the conversation that he doesn’t care if we have other plans?”

  “Not one whit,” Mallory confirmed as she smoothed her hands over Addison’s sides. It was a touch designed more to soothe than arouse because there was no denying that the mood had been most effectively killed.

  “And the bit about complaining to the front desk?” />
  Mallory pressed a kiss to the hollow of Addison’s throat. “He threatened to assemble a group of musicians to play outside our door until we relent and come out.”

  Addison laughed. “Sorry, but that’s kind of genius.”

  “It’s annoying.” Mallory smiled as she brushed Addison’s hair from her eyes. “I would much rather spend the day right here with you,” she breathed as she dipped her head to capture Addison’s lips in a sweet kiss. “Just like this.” She kissed her again. “I am so looking forward to being able to wake up like this every day.”

  “Me too,” Addison hummed, wrapping a hand around the back of Mallory’s neck to guide their lips together again.

  Despite Will’s threat of musical eviction, they lingered in the moment, trading slow, adoring kisses as they welcomed-in the day on their terms. Their days over the last month had been hectic and gratifying, but the open and the close of each one had been theirs and theirs alone. “I love you.”

  “I love—” Addison’s response was interrupted by a foghorn-esque honk from a tuba. She laughed and shook her head. “Has it really been half an hour?”

  Mallory glanced at the clock. “It hasn’t even been ten minutes.”

  “Sure doesn’t sound like it.”

  “No, it certainly doesn’t,” Mallory agreed. She held her breath as an ominous silence descended on the floor for a long moment, and let it go with a huff as the group assembled outside their door launched themselves into the final piece from Evolution with a ridiculous amount of enthusiasm. She shook her head as she rolled off Addison to sit up and stare at the door. “Wow…”

  Addison sat up beside her and cocked her head as she listened. “Is the tuba covering your part?”

  Mallory nodded. “He’s trying, anyway.” Honestly, she was rather impressed at how successful as he was with it. “I think we should probably get out there before they get themselves arrested.”

  “Good thing we showered after the show last night,” Addison noted as she gracefully rolled out of bed. “And that it doesn’t exactly require any effort to be presentable for the beach.”