Diaries of a Heartbroken Duchess: A Historical Regency Romance Collection

by Hamilton, Hanna

  “You played Robert so beautifully.”

  “Played him? Excuse me, but I have no idea what you are talking about. How, exactly, did I play him?”

  “Oh, the little innocent… Always playing so charming and naïve. But, in the meantime, manipulating Robert, the Earl of Donnelly, to find her so alluring that he just has to marry her.”

  Diana signed. “Oh, Amelia, I do not want our relationship as sisters to start out like this.

  “No. No. Brilliant.” Amelia threw her hands up in the air and paced as she spoke. “A simply brilliant stroke to convince Robert to accept the canal deal. Thinking by that you would win me over and insinuate yourself into this family and become the Countess of Donnelly. Just perfect.”

  Diana could not understand what was happening here but defended herself by saying, “Wait. Wait. I do not understand. Robert told me you encouraged him to ask me to marry him.”

  “Well, I have changed my mind.”

  “Why do you do this? Do you want to make him unhappy? Do you want to anger him? I cannot understand your motive.”

  “I do not trust you.”

  “And why not?” Diana said determined not to be intimidated.

  “I see me in you. Cunning, manipulative and ruthless. I see behind your façade of sweetness and innocence. As they say, ‘it takes one to know one.’”

  “I am truly sorry for you, Amelia. You totally misunderstand me. I have only Robert’s best interests at heart and I would never use falsehood to get my way. And I will do everything in my power to show you my real self and convince you otherwise.” Diana stood. “I will not tell Robert of our conversation. I do not want him to know how unkind you have been to me.”

  “And you say you never use falsehood. Is that not exactly what you are threatening to do now?”

  Diana shook her head, and then she realized what actually might be happening here. “Amelia, I believe you are playing a game with me. Is that not so? You are playacting with me. You mean absolutely nothing of what you just said, do you?”

  Amelia said nothing for a moment but smiled. “Brava. You are as astute as Robert says you are. Now we can be the very best of friends. And you must come shopping with me when you are staying with us in London. I know all the best shops and we will make sure you have an absolutely divine wedding gown.”

  As Diana left the room her head was spinning. She had absolutely no idea who Amelia was. Should she tell Robert what just happened or not? But she had to laugh because if she did not tell him, then Amelia would be right—she would be engaging in falsehood.

  Chapter 29

  Amelia had preceded Diana and Robert’s trip to London by several days and she greeted them warmly when they arrived at the London house. She was as charming and gracious as could be expected. Diana, however, had finally decided to engage in a small falsehood and had not told Robert of her strange encounter with Amelia the morning of the announcement of their engagement.

  But on this morning, Diana was very nervous. She had sent Adam a note saying she was in town and wanted to have tea with him this afternoon at Fortnum’s. She thought it best to meet in public in hopes of suppressing any embarrassing displays of emotion. Or was that cowardly? Might it not be best to break off the engagement in private where he could vent his grief? In any case, it had been decided, and she needed to prepare herself for the meeting.

  After breakfast, Diana found Robert in his study.

  “Robert, I shall be leaving at ten-thirty for my meeting with Adam.”

  Robert got up from his desk and went over to her and put his arms around her. “Do not be nervous.”

  “I cannot help it, Robert. I have to admit I feel horribly guilty.”

  “Engagements get broken all the time. Certainly, a little heartache now is better than a lifetime of misery in a miss-matched marriage.”

  Diana disengaged from his embrace. “Put like that, it does indeed make a great deal of sense. Thank you for letting me see that.”

  Robert returned to his desk and picked up an envelope. “I have here a bank draught for the amount of the loan plus a generous amount of interest. I have also included a document to be signed when Adam accepts the cheque. It will legally end the engagement and signify acceptance of the repayment of the loan.”

  Diana was troubled. “Oh, Robert, it all seems so cold and impersonal.”

  “And legal. You do not want any repercussions from ending the engagement.” He handed her the envelope and put his hands on her shoulders. “Use your sensitivity and charm to ease his disappointment and all will be well.”

  “I will do my best. Wish me well.”

  “More than that, I will send you with all my love.”

  * * *

  Diana was very nervous as she entered the Fortnum and Mason tea room. She immediately spotted Adam already seated at a table and went over as she took off her gloves.

  “Adam, thank you for meeting me,” she said as she took her place at the table? “Have you ordered yet?”

  Adam sat ramrod straight and frowning. “You want to break off the engagement.”

  Diana was stunned. “Oh, Adam…”

  “It is true, is it not?” he said leaning forward across the table and confronting her.

  Diana took a deep breath. “Yes, Adam, it is true. I cannot marry you. It has become clear over time, that as much as I honor and respect you, I do not love you.”

  “I thought as much,” he said dejectedly as he collapsed back into his chair, deflated.

  “Certainly you must see it too, Adam. We disagree on so much. And our interests are vastly different.”

  “But it is really the Earl who has won your heart, is it not? I have known for some time.”

  “He has asked me to marry him and I have accepted. Yes.”

  “Of course, how could I possibly compete with an Earl? That will make you… what? A countess or something?”

  Diana could see the hurt little boy lashing out. “But it is not just that, Adam. I have struggled for some time…”

  He cut her off. “You just agreed to marry me because you wanted to borrow the money for the leasehold.”

  Diana could not refute that. It was true. “Oh, Adam, I am so sorry.”

  It was then the waiter appeared with menus. “Sir, Madam, I will return to take your order shortly.”

  Diana looked at Adam to see if he really wanted to stay here and order tea. He shook his head.

  Diana turned to the waiter. “Excuse me. I am very sorry, but we will not be needing service this morning. Something has come up and we must leave.”

  The waiter had obviously seen everything in his career and he nodded nonchalantly. “As you wish.”

  Diana took out a pound note and left it on the table, and said to Adam, “Let us go. The park is nearby. Would you feel more comfortable if we strolled? I feel we need more time to discuss this.”

  Adam stood up. “I checked my coat. I will meet you at the entrance,” he said and left the tea room.

  This was not going as she had expected. She had hoped to control the conversation, but instead, Adam had taken the lead and she had ended up needing to defend herself.

  She met Adam in the lobby and they headed silently toward Green Park. When they finally reached the park, they found a bench under a tree that was dropping its golden leaves. The location mirrored a melancholy feeling that seemed to fit their current mood.

  After they sat, Diana took Adam’s hand in her gloved hands and said, “Adam, I know this is terribly unsettling for you. But I truly hope you can see why our marriage would not work.”

  “Does it matter? You have made up your mind.”

  Diana was, once again, faced with the stubborn and hurt little boy. She sighed, and let go of his hand. She reached into her bag and pulled out Robert’s envelope.

  She opened it and took out the document that needed signing.

  “Adam, I wish we could discuss this more fully, but you do not seem interested. But we must conclude this
fairly. I have a bank draught for you for the full amount of your father’s loan plus interest. And if you would be so kind as to sign this document we can conclude our engagement.

  “What is this?” he asked as he took the document.

  “It stipulates that the loan has been repaid and the engagement ended. It is simple and straightforward.”

  Adam read through the paper and Diana handed him a fountain pen. He signed the paper and gave it back to her as she handed him the cheque.

  “Now I must cancel all the honeymoon arrangements,” he said glumly.

  “Why not find someone to go with you? Why waste all the work you did organizing the trip?”

  Adam smiled. “What a splendid idea. I like that. There is this really capital young lady who works in my department at work. We chat all the time and she tells me how much she wants to travel and see the world. What a jolly good idea.”

  Diana was shocked that he could be considering such a thing right after they broke up, but she also understood that she had been right about Adam. He was too immature to be ready for marriage. But she smiled, and also understood Adam would land on his feet and be just fine.

  * * *

  “I do not understand. What kind of a surprise is this? Where are we? This seems a rather dubious place,” Diana said as she and Robert took the stairs to the third floor of a shabby old building in a less than savory part of London.

  When they reached the top floor, Robert knocked at a door which was shortly answered by a rather dapper older gentleman in a painting smock and a rakish cloth hat.

  “Ah, Milord. Exactly on time. Please come inside.”

  Diana and Robert entered a large room that revealed itself to be an artist’s studio. There was a large north-facing window that was part of the roof but also continued down the side of the wall to give ample light for painting. The light flooded a dais with two throne-like chairs and a fabric backdrop.

  “Diana, this is Sir William Sargent, perhaps our finest British portrait painter.”

  “Miss Diana…” he said offering his hand.

  “Sir William.”

  “We are to have our wedding portrait painted,” Robert said, then turned to Diana. “Do you remember the dinner where we discussed your portrait?”

  Diana laughed. “And that is why you requested I wear this gown?”

  “It is. And you still look stunning in it. Perfect for your portrait—with no thought of scaring away the foxes.”

  That set them both laughing.

  Sir William led them to the dais where he sat them down and arranged their positions. Then he stood back and studied them.

  “Excellent. Now, let us begin.”

  * * *

  “How could yo-o-o-u?” Geoffrey growled at Diana. “Not a word. Not a hint. Nothing.”

  Miriam came screaming to the door and threw her arms around Diana. “YOU ARE GOING TO BE A COUNTESS!” And she began to cry. “Where have you been? We went looking for you and it was your mother who had to tell us. You are very naughty going away to London and not letting us know you are marrying Robert.”

  They pulled her inside the house and sat her down on the sofa and sat opposite to grill her eye to eye.

  “I know. I was naughty not to tell you, but I had to break off my engagement with Adam first. I am sure you can understand. I was very nervous and wanted to get it over with.”

  “And did you?” Miriam asked.

  “Yes. It is all done. And now I am going to marry Robert.”

  “When is the wedding?” Geoffrey asked.

  “On Christmas day.”

  “Aw-w-w. That is perfect.”

  “And his sister is getting married at the same time,” Diana added.

  The twins looked at each other and said, “Well then…

  “We need to get married too?”

  Diana laughed. “To each other?”

  “Might as well be…”

  “No one else will have us.”

  “I doubt that.” Then Diana addressed Miriam, “Adam is available now.”

  Miriam scrunched up her nose. “No, thank you. He is a bit too… pallid for me.”

  “Yes, I understand.”

  “Not that he was not perfect for you… but well, he is a bit dry for my particular taste.”

  Geoffrey reached over and took Diana’s hand. “We are going to miss you. You are going to ride off on Robert’s white horse and then you will forget about us peons living on a subsistence existence of grasses and roots.”

  Diana was having none of his nonsense. “Stop. Right now. You know absolutely that I would never not see you again. But, if you misbehave, I will tell Robert and have him chop off your heads.”

  Miriam turned to Geoffrey, “She is going to be a monster, is she not? Cruel, cunning, and ruthlessly suppressing the masses. I just know it.”

  “But if you are very good I will invite you to the wedding.”

  “What are the eats? Will it be worth our while to attend?” Geoffrey asked.

  “It will be a scrumptious feast, I do believe.”

  “Very well, then. We will be there.”

  “How gracious of you.”

  Miriam asked, “Tell us how he asked you. Was it very romantic?”

  Diana told the tale of his proposal in the meadow.

  Geoffrey whispered to Miriam aside, loud enough that Diana could hear, “We need to get them a wedding present.”

  “Not necessary. He has everything already. In fact, we have discussed having presents for the guests.”

  “Oh, then we definitely will be there,” they said in unison.

  * * *

  Diana was getting absolutely no writing done, and probably would not until after the wedding. She was spending more and more time at Balfour Hall working with Amelia on planning the weddings. She actually spent more time with Amelia than she did with Robert, so he finally asked her if she wanted to have her own room at Balfour until the wedding, but she declined, saying she still needed to be with her parents, as it was particularly difficult for her mother to accept she would be gone.

  One morning soon after Diana arrived to work with Amelia, Robert asked her into the library where she was surprised to see Sir Cecil seated by the fire with a number of documents spread out on a table before him.

  “Good morning, Miss Diana, or, as I shall soon need to say, Your Ladyship.”

  Diana laughed. “I shall always be Diana to you.”

  Robert took Diana by the arm and led her to the table.

  “I asked Sir Cecil here today because I have an issue I would like to discuss with both of you.”

  Sir Cecil leaned back in the chair. “I am listening.”

  Diana sat down opposite him.

  Robert, as he was wont to do while thinking, began to pace. “Diana, I have been giving a lot of thought to our current arrangement regarding the publishing of my book.”

  “I have wondered about that since we are soon to be married. I considered we might have to make some changes.”

  “Yes, and what neither of you knows is that, even though he is soon to become my brother-in-law, The Viscount of Berwick still holds a threat over me. He has not agreed to never reveal that I am the author of my book. He seems to relish holding that power over me.”

  “But you agreed to the canal,” Diana said.

  “I did, but although he has agreed not to use that information right now, he could in the future, and I am no longer willing to offer him that power.”

  “And how do you plan to deal with that?” Sir Cecil asked.

  “By announcing publically that I am the proud author of my book. And after that, he can no longer threaten me.”

  “Robert… I… is that wise?” Sir Cecil sputtered. “Your reputation… my reputation…”

  “I know. I know. And that is why I have asked you both here today. You see, I have been thinking about this a great deal. We all know how ridiculous the idea is that a nobleman may not publish a work of fiction. The idea is
outdated, outworn, and ready to be discarded. It just needs a courageous individual to take the risk and be out in the open. And that is exactly what I intend to do.”

  “Oh, Robert…” Diana gasped. “What a stunning idea. Why have you not done this before?”

  “To be honest, I knew I would soon need to find a wife and I thought it might ruin any chance I had for happiness by driving all suitable prospects away. But now I have you.”