Blessed Trinity

by Vanessa Davis Griggs

  “Why should I worry about moving into a little dinky apartment or try to lease a house—?”

  “You could buy a house if you don’t want to rent or lease.”

  “Of course, you would say something like that. Newsflash, Johnnie. My FICO score is shot. Not everybody has A-1 credit to buy a house like you do. And those who do, still have a hard time getting approved for a loan. I’ll see what I can do when I get there, but I’m telling you upfront—I’m not really in a hurry. You have plenty of room in that big old house, and it makes sense for us to come and stay with you.”

  “You do remember I got married not long ago.”

  “I know it’s been two years—the honeymoon should be over by now.”

  “Well, I’m sorry to have to disappoint you, but it’s just gotten started,” Johnnie Mae said with a snap. “Our honeymoon is a long way from over.”

  “Ooh, did I push a button? Usually when someone is that defensive, it means something’s not right in paradise. That’s it, isn’t it? You aren’t excited about me coming to your house because you think I’ll find out you and the good pastor are having some marital problems?”

  “No, that’s not it at all.” Johnnie Mae paused. “But I do need to discuss this with him before I give you an answer.”

  “Discuss all you want. What are you going to do when we show up? Turn me and the children away? Now, I can go over to Mama’s and stay, but you know good and well these children are going to get on her nerves in a hurry. I’m trying to figure out the best solution for all concerned, and I think this is the best way. Regardless of what you decide, Johnnie, about me staying with you, I am packing my stuff, and I’ll be arriving in Birmingham in two weeks,” Rachel said. “Get back to me so I’ll know whose house, yours or Mama’s, to pull the moving truck up to once I’ve unloaded my other belongings to a storage unit.”

  “Okay, Rachel. I’ll let you know.”

  When Johnnie Mae hung up, she sat and stared at the phone. She knew Rachel was sincere about caring for their mother, but she also knew Rachel was making a point by deciding to move back now. Coming to live with her was just an additional dig. Johnnie Mae would gladly pay rent for her sister if she wanted a place to stay while she was here. Rachel’s plan was about being in her face, every day, to remind her of what a mistake it was for her to insist on allowing their mother to stay at home instead of putting her in a facility.

  Johnnie Mae couldn’t explain it. Whether it was a black thing, a southern thing, for some perhaps an economic thing, or just the way people cared about their loved ones; but she wasn’t the only one choosing to wait until the last moment to put a loved one in a nursing home. Physically, her mother was fine so a nursemaid wasn’t needed around the clock. At this point, her mother preferred staying in her own house. They merely needed to ensure while she was there that she didn’t wander off.

  Of course Johnnie Mae knew the struggles her mother was having; she couldn’t help but know. She had experienced them just like the rest of them had. And like them, it broke her heart, too.

  Chapter 21

  His seed shall be mighty upon earth: the generation of the upright shall be blessed.

  (Psalm 112: 2)

  Johnnie Mae planned to talk with Landris about her sister’s proposal after he came home later tonight. She was definitely not looking forward to this discussion. Landris already felt she allowed her family to run over her at times, although Johnnie Mae didn’t agree. She had always been a pretty strong personality, but being a Christian—and now the wife of a pastor—placed her under more scrutiny.

  It did hurt her a little when no one from her family chose to become a member of the church she and her husband started. Her family came to the initial meeting, but after that, not one—other than her mother—ever came for one of the services. Her former good friends, Honey and Sister, had also chosen not to visit, either.

  “I just feel like I’m supposed to stay where I am,” Johnnie’s Mae’s second-oldest sister Marie had said back in February when the two of them were over at their mother’s house. “I’m praying for you and George, though, Johnnie Mae. But my family and I have been members of our church for fifteen years.”

  “Yeah, but weren’t you the one complaining, just the other day,” Johnnie Mae said, “about how you’re not learning anything at your church?”

  Marie smiled. “Yes, I was. But that’s even more of a reason why I need to stay there. Those people need me. I study the Word and many of them wouldn’t know anything if I wasn’t there to teach them. I listen to George’s tapes over and over again, and pass on what I learn to them.”

  “All you teach is a Sunday school class. How many people are usually in your class?” Johnnie Mae asked.

  “That’s beside the point.”

  “No, I’m making a point. How many…roughly?”

  “Three,” Marie said smugly. “Give or take a few. But they’re faithful. You never know who your words are reaching, Johnnie Mae. Those two or three folks could end up going out and saving the world one day.”

  “Okay,” Johnnie Mae said. “I’m not trying to get you to come. I was merely pointing out how you complain, but you’re not doing anything to change the situation. Landris serves an all-you-can-eat spiritual feast, and my own family won’t even come and taste anything. But you’ll order carryout…listen to his tapes religiously.”

  “Don’t take it personally, Johnnie Mae. Let’s change the subject. Are you pregnant yet?”

  “No.”

  Marie looked disappointed. “I was thinking for certain you would be pregnant by now. How long have you been trying? Six months?”

  Johnnie Mae counted quickly in her head. It had indeed been six whole months. “Yeah, six.”

  “It’s all this pressure. I keep telling you—you’re probably worrying too much. You need to learn to relax more. And I’m sure this church stuff is not helping matters any.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You have to set up the chairs and do other things every week for Sunday services. I’m sure you’re the one who’s doing all that. Didn’t you tell me you drape a purple-and-gold cloth over that mammoth entertainment center in the den so it looks like a curtain behind the lectern? That’s got to be work, putting all that up and taking it down every single week.”

  “Landris puts out the chairs and helps drape the cloth. It’s not that much on me.”

  Marie hunched her shoulders. “If you say so. I know the situation with Mama has got to be weighing heavily on your mind, too.”

  “We’re all doing what we can. I’m sure you’re just as concerned as I am about her. You’ve been great, doing your part for her. I appreciate that.”

  “Well, it’s a lot of work for all of us. This can’t be helping when you’re trying to get pregnant. I could be wrong, but George probably couldn’t care less whether you get pregnant or not anyway. He’s likely praying that you don’t.”

  Johnnie Mae frowned at Marie. “Why would you say something like that?”

  Marie cocked her head to one side. “Johnnie Mae, if I were you and George, a baby would be the last thing on my mind. I would be working to get Princess Rose all grown and gone, and then enjoy my time to myself.”

  “Landris and I both have had plenty of time to ourselves. I think having a baby would be perfect. At our age, we’re more settled. Some things, I’ve noticed, don’t bother me the way they did or would have when I was younger.”

  Marie finished softening the last lemon she was rolling on the kitchen table. She took out a knife and sliced off the top, then started squeezing it into the glass pitcher. “Running after young children, at your and George’s age is going to be a challenge. Maybe you should leave well enough alone. You and George are able to travel without having to worry about a child. Maybe God has plans for the two of you, like missionary work, that doesn’t include a newborn.”

  Johnnie Mae got up and stirred the pot of pinto beans, her mother’s favorite. “And maybe this
is the devil trying to deter us from a blessing God has ordained for us.”

  “Yeah, okay. If it’s ordained, then no devil in hell will be able to stop it. If I were you, though, I would pray to God about a lot of things. Mama being tops on your list. Johnnie Mae, she’s not getting better, and you and I both know she’s not going to. At some point, you’re going to have to let go.”

  “When that time comes, I’ll know.”

  Marie looked at her watch. “Well, it’s time for me to go.” She leaned over and kissed her sister on the cheek. “Just as a heads up—Mama’s having a bad day today.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. I ran her bath water and she went in and undressed as usual. The next thing I know, she was yelling my name. I ran to the door and answered her. She said, ‘Marie, was I getting in the tub or out of the tub?’ It just hurts to see her this way now.”

  “I know. The other day she was at my house and started playing with Princess Rose. She grew tired and decided to retire to the room I fixed up for her. Just like with you, she started calling me. I didn’t know what was wrong, but when I got there, she stood…paralyzed, halfway up the stairs.”

  “What happened?” Marie asked.

  “She said, ‘Johnnie Mae, was I going up the stairs or down the stairs?’ I’m not being naïve about what’s happening with her, Marie. But honestly, how many of us have gone to do something and found ourselves looking around, trying to remember what we went in to do? It’s part of getting older. But there are days when her mind is sharp, and she really is back to being her normal self. She can tell me things I did when I was a little girl, recalling some things I only remember after she starts reminding me about it.”

  Johnnie Mae was thinking about these things as she sat with her mother. They were having a nice conversation, and Johnnie Mae debated whether she should mention the call she’d gotten from Rachel earlier that morning. Her mother suddenly became quiet, which typically was an indication that her mind was shifting to another time or place. The doctor had told them to try and keep her current whenever she started having her episodes.

  “Mama, what’s wrong?” Johnnie Mae asked calmly.

  “Nothing,” she said as she began looking around the room.

  Johnnie Mae watched her mother fidget and continue to lean forward as though she was looking for someone to come through the door.

  Johnnie Mae’s eyes traveled from her mother to the doorway. “Mama, are you expecting someone?”

  “Sort of.”

  “Who are you looking for?”

  Her mother smiled. “I’m sure she’ll be here any minute. She’s usually always on time. You can almost set your watch by her.”

  “Who? Who’s usually always on time?”

  “My daughter.”

  “You mean Marie?” Johnnie Mae was baffled because her mother knew Marie had just left a little while ago. Marie had kissed her good-bye.

  “Not Marie. Marie was here earlier. I’m talking about my other daughter.”

  Johnnie Mae wondered if Rachel had called and told her she was moving back. If so, she wished Rachel hadn’t done that. Mrs. Gates had difficulty gauging time, especially during episodes.

  “Are you looking for Rachel, Mama? Did Rachel call and tell you she’s coming to visit you?”

  “Rachel?” Her mother looked at her like she was crazy. “No, not Rachel. Rachel lives in…in…well, I can’t remember right now exactly where, but she lives somewhere out of town. I’m talking about my daughter the author. Do you know my Johnnie Mae? She was supposed to be here by now.” Mrs. Gates started looking toward the door again, then stood and looked out the window. “I pray nothing’s happened to her. Johnnie Mae is never late. She’s dependable like that. Did you know she’s famous?”

  “Mama, I’m Johnnie Mae.”

  Her mother looked at her. “Oh,” she said. She then became silent and sat back down.

  “Mama, you okay? Do you need anything?”

  Mrs. Gates smiled, shook her head, and once again, started looking toward the door.

  Johnnie Mae went over and hugged her as she wiped away a tear.

  “Are you all right?” Mrs. Gates asked. “You’re crying. Why are you crying?”

  “Yeah,” Johnnie Mae whispered, “I’m all right.”

  “Did you know I have a daughter who’s an author? She’s famous. Did you know that? She’ll be here any minute. I don’t know what’s keeping her. Maybe you’ll tell her why you’re crying when she gets here.”

  Johnnie Mae managed a smile and wiped another rolling tear off her face. “She’s famous, huh? Wow, that must be something,” she said.

  “Oh, it is. It really is. I’m so proud of her. Proud of all my children, if I can be so bold as to say that to you.” Mrs. Gates nodded her head and rocked back and forth a few times. “All of them. Bertha will be by later. She’s such a dear. I just love her so much. Only, she’s gotten a bit old-looking of late. I don’t know what happened. She went downhill mighty fast. We have so much fun, though. We play a game of concentration. I’m not too good at it anymore. Not too good. She claims it’s my memory. I just think Bertha cheats. What did you say your name was again, dearest?”

  “Johnnie Mae.”

  “Wow, what are the odds of that? I have a daughter named Johnnie Mae. She’s an author. She’ll be here any minute.” She started looking at the door again. “Any minute now.”

  “I’m sure she will,” Johnnie Mae said. She touched a strand of her own graying hair.

  Chapter 22

  Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.

  (Proverbs 11:14)

  Johnnie Mae and Pastor Landris discussed Rachel’s plans to come and stay with them.

  “Did she say for how long?” Pastor Landris asked.

  “Not exactly.”

  “Bad idea, Johnnie Mae.”

  “What? That my sister is coming, or that she wants to live with us?” Johnnie Mae looked up at him as she continued to chop an onion, causing tears to sting her eyes.

  “Listen, I would never tell you your sister or any other family member or even a friend couldn’t stay here. In truth, this is your house.”

  “Landris, don’t do that. You and I agreed we weren’t ever going to go into the ‘my and your’ thing.”

  “I know. But I’m just being realistic here.”

  “If I didn’t respect your feelings about this, I wouldn’t have asked. I told Rachel I needed to talk with you before I gave her an answer.”

  “Great,” he said. “Make me out to be the bad guy. That’s okay. If you decide to tell her she can’t come here, I don’t mind if she thinks I’m the reason.”

  “I wouldn’t do something like that, and you know it.”

  He touched her hand to halt her chopping, took the knife, and laid it down on the butcher block. “Johnnie Mae, wash your hands and let’s you and I talk about this without any distractions.”

  “I’m fine. I need to finish making dinner.”

  “Dinner can wait. I’ll help when we’re finished talking, but this is important.”

  Johnnie Mae washed her hands and she and Landris sat side by side. He took her hand and held it softly but firmly.

  “Johnnie Mae, if you want your sister and the children…”

  “We’re talking about two teenagers—one sixteen, the other seventeen—and three grandchildren all under the age of seven,” she said.

  “If you want all six of them to come here and live, that’s fine with me. Am I crazy about the idea? No. But then again, I’ll be all right. I’m not going to lie. I love having the house to ourselves—just me, you, and Princess Rose. Of course, we were working on that baby project, but I guess we’ll just have to keep things quiet around here while we work.”

  Johnnie Mae slapped his hand. “Stop that,” she said, smiling. “You’re just being mannish.”

  “I’m keeping it real. You’re my wife, and what we have is beautiful.
I refuse to act like it’s anything other than that. Now here’s what I suggest. If they’re coming to live with us, you need to establish, up front, for how long.”

  “But she doesn’t know, Landris. And honestly, I’m not sure I even want her to come here. I just know she and I are going to get into it over Mama. I know it.”

  “Johnnie Mae, listen to what I’m saying. Rachel might not know now, but you still need to set a time frame up front. If you tell her three months, then both of you will know what’s expected. If you don’t set a time limit, she could be here forever. You’ll want her to leave, and she’ll feel like you’re throwing her out.”

  “You’re right, Landris. I know what you’re saying is right. But I feel guilty because we do have this house with plenty of room, and it seems selfish if I tell her she can’t come, especially since she’s coming to help with Mama. They’re already upset with me because they think I’m being contrary.”

  “Diligently pray about what you should do. If you want Rachel here, I’ll be fine with it for as long as I have to be. If you decide you don’t want her to stay, that’s fine, too. But—”

  She rolled her head around in a half-circle and sighed. “I know—if I say yes, I need to set a general, agreed-upon, time period.”

  “Exactly. And if you want to extend it later, you can always do that. There’s no rule that says you’ll have to put her out by the time you’ve set if you don’t want to.”

  “She probably won’t leave regardless. Landris, you don’t know my sister.”

  “Oh,” he smiled, “I think I got a pretty good idea the last time she was here.”

  “She was pretty hard on you that day. But you handled yourself in a very gentlemanly manner. I’ll give you that much.”

  Johnnie Mae called Rachel back that night. They talked for over an hour. Rachel would stay with them for six weeks while she looked for a place of her own.

  “So we agree, then?” Johnnie Mae asked her.