Dead Beat

by Remy Porter

  ‘I’m not staying with that boy. Lester can do that fine. I am going with you. This stupid plan will work better with two people anyway.’

  ‘I’d go with the flow if I was you, son,’ Lester piped in. ‘You’re not going to win with this one.’

  I waited for Summer to dig out her old PCSO uniform from a bottom drawer.

  ‘Never thought I’d be wearing this again.’

  On the way out of the door I stopped. ‘We need our hats. Full uniform will help us pull this off.’

  ‘Sure Johnny, hats will make all the difference,’ Summer smiled.

  The drive to the farm was a lot quicker than it used to be now there weren’t bodies cluttering up the roads. The drop down the valley gave a clear view of the fence that bisected the series of fields to the east of the village. From this distance, it looked like ants were gathering in their hundreds on the other side. Except they weren’t ants, they were the rotting, stinking, walking carcasses. A festering reminder of our bubble, and the fact that everywhere else belonged now to the dead. I wanted to get used to the way things were, but it just never happened.

  ‘More everyday,’ Summer said.

  Nodding, I steered the police vehicle down the gravel track towards the farm. They had some new building project underway; a crude breezeblock framework that appeared to be some new accommodation block being built next to the farmhouse. It was a total eyesore, but who cared about these things anymore, I told myself. Planning permission was just two redundant words.

  I parked and killed the engine. Curious faces of the villagers were coming out to have a look-see. Lester, Summer and I often talked over sambuca shots about how we felt like outsiders in the village. What made us not want to be part of this farm community? I liked Summer’s answer best, she hated the smell of shit in the morning and thought cows’ big, glassy eyes were pure evil.

  ‘I haven’t seen you two down here in over a month. What’s with the uniforms?’ Bob Sack said poking his fat face through the driver window.

  ‘Official business I’m afraid. How are those wind turbines?’

  ‘You know, still turning.’ He looked a little confused. Worry lines breaking out on his forehead.

  Summer and I stepped out of the vehicle and we started walking towards the farmhouse.

  ‘Where are you going? Jack and Griffin aren’t far away you know. Chasing down those two zombie poofters, no doubt.’

  ‘Anyone seen them yet?’ Summer asked.

  ‘No, nobody’s seen a thing. Maybe they just crawled off and died,’ Bob said with an awkward skip to get in front of us. ‘Look I really don’t think you should go inside. Just wait until Jack and Griffin get back okay.’

  ‘Can’t do that,’ I said in my best police tone. ‘Crime scene. Can’t lose any more evidence.’

  I pushed past, and Summer followed close behind. I saw the woman I knew as Alison tidying away washed pots and pans in the kitchen. I looked her straight in the eyes and gambled.

  ‘Can you show me the stairs where it happened? We need to see it straight away.’

  Alison hesitated a beat. ‘Of course, right this way.’

  Bob Sack was still protesting, but I could see Alison was on side and happy to play along. Summer and I knew there was an inherent ridiculousness in what we were doing, but we were going to play it straight for all it was worth.

  ‘It happened right there,’ Alison said pointing to a series of broken banister rails on the stairs.

  ‘I’m going to get Jack and Griffin right now. Jesus, you haven’t even asked how Griffin is yet. He’s the victim after all, isn’t he?’ Bob said, heading for the front door.

  ‘Of course he is,’ Summer said, giving her sweetest smile.

  Once he was out of the way, I turned to Alison.

  ‘Look, we haven’t got much time. We need to get Jean and Toby, and their son Phillip out of here and to the police station. Mark told us what they were doing to Toby, and unless you want to be implicit in a murder, you’ve got to help us. Where are they?’

  ‘Mrs Hanson and Phillip are locked in their room. Mr Hanson is out in the back yard. You need to help him quickly, before it’s too late.’ Alison replied.

  ‘Okay, Alison you go with Summer and help get Jean and Mark to our vehicle. I’ll get Toby.’

  Turning, I walked swiftly through the house. Gathering voices were clearly audible at the front of the farmhouse. I weaved my way through the back rooms, and stepped through the glass-panelled door into the back yard. The walled garden was empty, nothing but clothes on a washing line and broken rabbit hutches. There were two sheds next to a high dry stone wall. Inside were a rusted lawnmower and other long ceased machinery. I waded deeper into the overgrown brambles and found a vague outline of a path.

  At the far end was a man hung by his hands from the outstretched branches of a willow tree. No boxer would’ve been allowed to take the punishment visible in his face. One eye was swollen as if a ripe plum was growing out of the socket. His gagged mouth was a bloodied mass of broken teeth and torn gums. Long strips of flesh had been flayed off his torso. One arm was dislocated and clearly broken. This was revenge to the power of ten.

  ‘Toby, can you hear me?’

  His head lolled back. In his good, eye a series of rapid blinks.

  He was alive.

  My knife came out of my back pocket, and I gently cut the bindings. He immediately slumped into my arms, heavy and wheezing.

  ‘You need to stand up, you’ve got to try. We need to walk out of here Toby, or neither of us will make it,’ I said pulling the gag out of his mouth.

  ‘My family ... you have to save them first. Please.’

  ‘They are fine,’ I said. ‘Alison is taking them to my police car right now. Jean and Phillip are fine. Mark is already at the station. He’s the one who told me what these bastards were up to. Come on Toby, we need to get going.’

  I half steered, half dragged him back into the farmhouse. In the kitchen, I saw some people from the village. They didn’t say anything, and wouldn’t meet my eyes. Ashamed, they didn’t offer any help either. We made it all the way to the front door and we staggered out into the farmyard.

  Shit!

  ‘Well officer, what have you got yourself there,’ Jack sneered.

  ‘Come into my Dad’s house without asking first will you. Tut! Tut!’ Griffin added. He had his left arm crudely splinted between two sticks of wood. A shotgun leaned against his leg.

  Jack and Griffin had positioned themselves in front of the Freelander. Alison, Jean and Phillip were stood with Summer to one side.

  ‘Jesus Christ,’ Jean cried, and ran over to where I was holding her husband upright. ‘What have they done to you?’

  ‘Can you hold him one minute?’ I whispered to her.

  Walking forward, all eyes fell on me. The other villagers hovered on the periphery of the yard. It was time to make my six years feet dragging through a police career finally count for something. There was more than one life to save now. I held my breath until I was within two feet of Jack, then spoke.

  ‘So Jack, I hear you’ve been having yourself a few issues lately.’

  ‘If you call that fucker cold cocking my son and breaking his arm issues, then yes you’re right. Got what was coming to you, didn’t you Toby. Not half finished yet neither.’

  ‘We’ve got a crime here Jack, there is no getting away from that,’ I spoke up, clear and loud.

  ‘Our officer here standing in his bright sparkling uniform seems to be failing to remember the world ain’t what it was. We got five hundred head of zombie behind that fence line. Ain’t no government paying you wages. World turned to shit, or didn’t you notice?’ Griffin spat at me. ‘We do our own justice now.’

  ‘The fuck you do Griffin,’ I said. ‘You think just because you built a bit of fence you are suddenly above the law. What do you think would happen if the army came into town tomorrow, and they found out you’d killed a man? Not a zombie, but an innocent man, G
riffin, what do you think they would do with you?’

  ‘Fucking army? Ain’t nobody here but us.’

  ‘You sure of that? You looked further than the end of your nose? When did you last take a ride out to the cities? And what about the other countries? Truth is we don’t know shit. So maybe you two should think on. Until we know any different, I think you might want to restrain yourself from killing every person that looks at you cross-eyed.’

  ‘Are you coming to a point somewhere in that horse shit?’ Jack snarled.

  ‘Now, there has been a crime committed here, and it’s my duty to investigate. That’s my fucking job, wages or no wages. So Mr Hanson here is coming to the station to answer some questions. And Phillip and Jean are coming too. They’re material witnesses, and I want their statements.’

  ‘No fucking way. They stay,’ Griffin shouted in my face.

  ‘You know how this ended last time,’ I reminded him.

  ‘Try it again. Make my damn year.’

  ‘Hold your fucking water Griffin,’ Jack snapped. ‘Anyways, I’m curious to see what the officer’s idea of justice is anyhow.’

  I took my chance and beckoned Summer and Jean to come forward. I looked at Alison, asking her with my eyes if she wanted to come too. She just slunk back in the shadows of the porchway. Too scared, I imagined.

  Pushing past Jack, I opened up the vehicle. All the time I was terrified Griffin might open up the shotgun and kill us where we stood. I gestured to Summer and got us and the Hansons into the vehicle as quickly as possible. Jack was gesturing for me to roll the window down.

  ‘Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing. I thought I’d give you a free pass this time, purely for my amusement,’ Jack said leaning in. ‘Next time you go in my house uninvited, I got a nice patch of honeysuckle bush I’m going to bury you under. We clear?’

  ‘Crystal,’ I said and drove away.

  ‘We’re going to have to watch our backs now,’ I said to Summer.

  She nodded.

  ‘We should leave this place soon. All of us.’

  CHAPTER 24

  ‘You know I remember you now,’ Jean Hanson said as we made the upstairs sergeant’s room back into a habitable living space.

  ‘I interviewed Phillip and Mark for burning all those rubbish bins in the village. Big case for me,’ I laughed.

  ‘You were pretty decent, I thought,’ Jean replied. ‘I take it you don’t really want to interview me for Griffin’s arm?’

  ‘Tape machine broke last year anyway, and they never replaced it. Seriously, I may have to think up something to keep those psychos happy. Community service maybe? Let me think on it, and I’ll come up with something.’

  ‘You’re a good man.’

  Toby Hanson slept on the mattress we’d put down on the floor of the office. He had been catatonic all the journey back, and was yet to say a word. I suspected we might lose him, that his injuries were far beyond recoverable with our primitive medical skills. It wasn’t hard to read Jean’s face. She must have been thinking the exact same thing. Every one of us knew how it was to lose people. This world was nothing but grief and loss and murder. I knew that even before the outbreak came.

  ‘I’m going to stay with him a while,’ Jean said. ‘Will you make sure Phillip and Mark don’t do anything stupid, like burn the place down?’

  ‘Not much to burn now, after Lester took his turn. You lost your child at the farm. Are you sure you are alright, that you don’t need anything?,’ I asked.

  ‘Got a time machine perhaps?’ Jean replied, turning her face away.

  I found Summer and Lester in the refreshment room. She was whipping up some powdered Angel Delight for the two young boys, who sat at the table with sporks in their hands. They couldn’t get enough of the stuff.

  ‘How are we all doing?’ I said trying to keep it upbeat. ‘Where’s that old bird Jefferson got to now? He was here a minute ago.’

  ‘Out for another walk,’ Lester said, looking up from one of the old newspapers he liked to collect. ‘Old buzzard walks more miles than a damn postman. Said he wanted to take another look around for Bill and Arthur.’

  ‘Hope he took his pistol,’ Summer added. ‘I’m sick of everyone dying around here.’

  ‘No-one’s dying,’ I said back to her and nodded at the boys. ‘Let’s keep it upbeat okay.’

  ‘Food’s getting a little on the low side. With our new guests it might be best if we get down that supermarket and do some digging,’ Summer said closing up the freezer.

  ‘Well, it’s something to do. Professor Lester, are you game to join me?’ I said.

  ‘Most certainly.’

  ‘I’ll look after these two mud scrappers,’ Summer said.

  I looked across and watched Phillip and Mark devouring their Angel Delight. Not a care in the world. It was good to see.

  I fired the Freelander down the hill to the main row of shops in the village. There was a spoken agreement with the farmers that only tinned or packet food that was needed would be taken. Stocks were low, but usually there was always stuff to be found on the shelves or the store rooms at the back. I parked in a space outside the old green grocers, a place that was nothing but rotten, pulped vegetables and awful odours. The Village Store was next door. It looked like we had the place to ourselves.

  The Store was larger and better stocked than Tomlinson’s on the hill, and after my bad experience on the first day of the outbreak I much preferred going to this place. It was brighter, and the aisles were much wider. It just felt an all-round safer bet.

  Lester and I entered cautiously, my hands gripping the sawn-off tight enough to turn my knuckles white. We knew short, fast response weapons were by far the best idea in these confined spaces. Going up the aisle Lester grabbed a basket. There were a lot of bare spaces on the shelves now. I found some corned beef, pasta, powdered milk and cereal.

  ‘I’m starting the vegetable garden up in the summer. Some rich guy’s lawn is going to get turned into an allotment. I’m telling you, Johnny, either we go Good Life or we perish.’

  ‘Does that make you Felicity Kendall then, Lester?’

  ‘Always cracking the wise, aren’t you.’

  ‘I’m sorry Lester. You’re right of course. You’ve come a long way from those streets, do you know that?’ I picked up a jar of olives, and then sat them back down again.

  ‘Yeah, and you’ve come a long way from being a fascist with a tit hat too,’ he smiled.

  ‘You know Lester, I’ve remember picking up a swab of something chemical back on the first day this happened. It was the strangest thing, the water was almost sparkling around this dead seal. If I can find it, perhaps we could take a look at it together.’

  Lester smiled again. He no longer looked anything like the drunken tramp with a chip on his shoulder. There was a deep scholarly feel about him now. He’d even taken to wearing a casual suit and tie. Only in a certain light could you see the wear and tear on his skin, from the cold nights sleeping rough with only a bottle of the cheap stuff for company.

  ‘You’ve done well, you know that. What’s your secret?’

  ‘I don’t know. I guess this new world has given me a second chance. Back in the day, I burnt too many bridges to ever get back into society. Here, I feel I might be able to save the whole world. It feels better than drinking somehow,’ he said.

  ‘Does that make me your sponsor?’

  We drove away with our meagre rations, enough food for another week at least. At the station I saw Summer standing outside, looking up at the building. There was worry on her face.

  ‘Somebody broke our window. They threw this,’ she said holding up a half brick.

  CHAPTER 25

  We should have felt safe with a fence cutting us off from the dead. There should have been a feeling of community, of massive collective gratitude that we’d all survived against the odds. But it wasn’t like that now, and it probably never was. Jack and Griffin ran the farm, and the village
rs were their new livestock. People bent to their will as if the trauma of the outbreak had robbed them of their own free will. It appeared that only a few villagers, such as the Hansons could see past the dictatorship and try to break away. For the rest, the need to survive the apocalypse by whatever means overrode their moral codes and value systems. At least the dead were honest, they just wanted to eat you every time.

  ‘PIGS END’

  As I looked up at red painted graffiti scrawled over my beloved Freelander it felt as rotten in this so-called bubble as beyond the fence line. That morning I’d seen things that had been human stood reaching through metal links, with rats living in the empty cavities where their stomachs should be. Vermin as parasitic house guests in people’s own bodies. I wished I could feed Jack and Griffin to them.

  ‘What do you want to do?’ Summer asked me.

  ‘If we go there and confront them with no evidence, we’ll get nowhere fast. Short term it would be better to catch them at it. Take turns on look out, maybe rig up a camera.’

  ‘And long term?’

  ‘Get the hell out of here.’

  It had been weeks since the first window had been broken. Since then other small things had been broken or gone missing. It was subtle, and it was not every day, but beneath it I suspected something of a campaign against us. We’d see Griffin drive past and wave far more regularly then before with some minion or other. We would have to be blind not to see he was sending us a message. Whispers came that he was bitter. His broken arm had healed badly. Griffin hated that we had taken Toby Hanson out of his reach. It was clear he wasn’t ready for anything approaching bygones or forgiveness.

  I’d mentioned the words ‘community service’ to Jack in the days after taking the Hansons away from the farm, aiming to placate him somehow. Jack had dismissed me with the words, ‘Justice will be here soon enough.’ He told me not to worry about that, ‘That a time was coming.’ Looking into his cold, glassy eyes that day I realised we were all basically fucked.