Hidden Voices (Tess Schafer-Medium)

by Deborah Hughes

  “Yes, do. I’d like to hear more of that myself.” Rid’s gray brow lifted curiously. He glanced at me and then Kade. Judging by the look in his eyes, I’d say he was somewhat surprised that Kade would participate in something like that. Little did he know.

  “As I said, there isn’t much to tell I’m afraid.” And when Barbara was about to protest, I raised a hand to staunch the flow. “Yes, yes, the chairs moved and some sort of strange shadow dance appeared on the floor but other than a few theatrics, I really didn’t get much in the way of a message.”

  “Much? Then you got something?” Rid asked.

  He was a shrewd one. That he was. “As I mentioned, I do know it was a male who came through. He was a big guy and I surmise that he was a relative of Night Rowan’s. I felt…I sensed frustration coming from him. He wants to communicate but for some reason, he’s having a hard time doing it. I really think that there’s a lot of concern for the Rowans because they are about to lose their home.” This statement put a pall on our mood and we went silent for a moment.

  “Is there no way for them to avert the foreclosure?” Rid asked.

  “Sure. If they can come up with the money, they could stop it. Otherwise, it’s gone too far in the process at this point. They’ve already received notice of an auction date. Unless they can come up with the money by then, someone else is going to snatch up that house.” I did want it to be me but at the same time, I knew I couldn’t go around buying properties for people. At this point in my life, I had no intention of looking for a job. Why should I when I had a tidy sum to support myself? I didn’t dare jeopardize the security that offered me.

  Rid shook his head. “It’s a sorry state of affairs. Such a shame when that house has been in the family since before Bucksport’s inception.”

  Again we went silent. I thought about all the information Rid had imparted and I knew, I just KNEW there was a connection to everything I’d been exposed to the past few days.

  Kade glanced at his watch and tapped my arm to get my attention. “You want to head on over to the fort while it’s still relatively early? I know you probably have another destination in mind before we head back here and I do want to get moving on the painting for Barbara. I imagine you will be itching to write some more on your story, too. Besides, Dawn and Mary will be here this afternoon and you’ll want some time to visit with them.”

  Barbara stood up and began to gather the dishes. “You two go on and enjoy your day.”

  I stood as well and began to gather up our dishes when Barbara gently swatted my hand. “No you don’t. This is my job. Yours is to be the guest.”

  Smiling, I relinquished hold of my plate and walked around the table to give Rid a hug. “Thanks for sharing so much great information, Rid.”

  Rid patted my hand. “It’s my pleasure. I don’t get to talk about my favorite subject often enough these days.” With a twinkle in his faded blue eyes, he held my hand for added emphasis. “If you ever want to know about my peppered family history, just let me know. I’ve lots of skeletons in the family closet.”

  Laughing at his expression and intrigued, I gave him a decisive nod. “Count on it.”

  “Do you need directions anywhere?” Barbara asked.

  Kade shook his head. “I think we can find our way around okay. Thanks. You two have a nice day.”

  It wasn’t until we were crossing the bridge from Bucksport to the island of Verona that Kade, who had taken over the driving duties, reached for my hand and brought it to his mouth for a kiss. “This mystery of yours gets more interesting as we go along. I wonder if we’ll be bombarded by spirits at this fort?”

  I was admiring the view of the fort from the bridge and taking in the river walk along Bucksport’s shores but I pulled my gaze away to meet his enquiring one. “Do you think the fort is haunted? Did a lot of people die there?”

  Kade let our entwined hands fall to the gear shift, letting his hand rest atop mine in a firm hold. “Not sure. It was never used for the purpose for which it was built.”

  “To keep the British at bay? I think that’s what I read.”

  Kade nodded. “Exactly. Ever since the disaster in Castine, the locals didn’t quite trust the British. Since this was a strategic area and control of it was vital, they built the fort. Which, by the way, was never even completed. Nor was it ever needed for its intended purpose.”

  “Still, I imagine the undertaking to build something like that was dangerous. There are probably a few lost souls there.” A shiver raced through me as I spoke and I knew I was right. Should I put up shields and try to keep them at bay or remain open to possible contact? Given that I was hoping to make sense of the cryptic messages coming from the spirit world the past few days, it would probably be best to take my chances and stay open to them.

  That decision made me a little uneasy as we pulled into the fort’s visitor parking lot. Oh yes, lots of paranormal activity going on here. Great.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  As Kade and I stepped out of the car, I could almost feel the spirits beginning to gather and look our way, their radar for people who could detect them on full alert. A cool breeze picked up and blew gently. A wild thought went through my mind that it was them, their curiosity and excitement stirred, brushing by for a closer look. Opportunity to interact with our world was rare for them and when it suddenly presented itself, they could be very persistent. I took a quiet moment to say a prayer for protection and envisioned my security blanket…my imaginary light…cocooning me in a tight, unbreakable circle.

  I took Kade’s hand and silently invited Sheila to join us. When her tickle of cobwebs brushed my face, my anxiety melted away. If she was near, I had extra protection. Not that I was really worried about that because I didn’t get any uneasy feelings of negative energy. No, it was excitement that buzzed in the air and although it could get annoying, it was certainly not dangerous.

  Kade and I walked at a leisurely pace down past the visitor's center, which we decided to check out later before leaving the park, and continued on around the fort’s outer wall which, of course, faced the Penobscot River. The view across to Bucksport was spectacular. The quaint town spread out along the gently sloping shores of the river’s opposite bank was quite picture worthy and Kade stopped to snap some photos. The retaining wall leading up to where we were standing was an impressive show of workmanship. I couldn’t even imagine all the work that had gone into building it. Mid-sized blocks were layered in a style that reminded me of the outer walls of the great pyramids (something I hadn’t seen personally but hope to remedy in the not-too-distant-future). After admiring the view a little longer, we entered the fort’s interior through the arched granite entryway Kade told me was called the Sally Port (he was reading the brochure we were given when we paid the entrance fee). We came out into the fort’s interior open space.

  “Oh, it’s a bailey. Isn’t that what they called these open courtyards within the fort boundaries?” I hadn’t ever seen a castle in person either but the historical romance books I used to read so much when I was a teenager always made me feel as if I had.

  Kade grinned and shook his head. “This area is called the parade grounds but if you want to call it a bailey, go right ahead.”

  I gave him a playful swat. “Same difference, Kade. I’m sure the architects of the day were operating on knowledge garnered from the fortifications of castle structures.”

  Kade draped an arm about my shoulders and steered me toward a row of vaulted rooms. Though they stood open to the parade grounds, their outer wall faced the river and was made of huge granite stones. For that matter, so were the dividing walls and arched ceilings. I saw narrow slotted openings in the wall facing the river and wondered if they were windows.

  “Those vaulted rooms are called casements. The cannons were housed there." He pointed to the highest casement in the row and I saw it still housed a single cannon. It faced the narrow slotted opening and I realized it wasn't a window. It was where the cann
on balls were shot from. "They never used it so don’t be thinking of its murder rate.” Kade dropped a kiss on my brow and let his arm fall down until our hands met and held. “Let’s go look at the spiral staircase. This fort has two of them. There are only five such staircases in our humble country.”

  The stonework involved to create the spiral staircase leading to the upper levels of the fort was quite impressive and Kade took more pictures. The entire fort was such a feat of workmanship and skill that we marveled over and over everywhere we went. I could well imagine the blood and sweat suffered by the workers as they labored day in and out, shaping and placing the massive granite blocks.

  The inner walls of the officers’ quarters were mostly constructed of brick. How tiring it had to have been to place each one. The task must have loomed before them in a never-ending cycle of repetition. What did they think about as they layered all these bricks and stacked those massive stones? Were they too tired to think? Did any of them die during this massive undertaking?

  Even as I thought the question, a shiver crawled along my spine until it reached my scalp and made my head tingle to the point that I wanted to run my hands though my hair to rid it of the feeling. I let go of Kade’s hand and slowly circled about. “Someone’s here.”

  Remaining respectfully silent, Kade moved away to give me space and pulled his sketch pad from his knapsack. He nodded toward an outside wall. “I’ll just go and make some sketches while you, ah…do what you do.”

  Smiling at his quick understanding, I blew him a kiss and turned away to concentrate. Now that I was focused on the energy around me, I realized there was more than one. Several men from the feel of it. Not sure why they were here, wandering the fort in their bodiless world, I silently told them they should look for the light and move into it. Whether they took my advice or even heard me, I couldn’t say.

  What did I really know of the afterlife? Maybe they liked hanging out in this drafty old fort of brick and stone. How or why it happened, I couldn’t say, but it did seem that some people, once in spirit, became confused about where they were or what they should do. Some of them were afraid to move on and so lingered in what I considered “limbo”. Though I was pretty sure my idea of limbo wasn't quite the same as what they actually experienced. I came to understand through my interactions with spirit that those lingering in the Tri-State do not have any sense of time. For them there is only awareness of being. To my mind, it was the quality of that being that mattered. Spend it hanging around this world, or spend it on other adventures. I did hope I would pick other adventures when I finally crossed over.

  The room’s temperature began to steadily drop causing me to shiver slightly and wish I’d remembered to grab my sweater from the car. The interior of the fort was considerably cooler than the outside because the thick granite blocks were quite effective in holding off the sun’s warmth. The structure was designed, after all, to sustain direct hits from cannon balls. The steadily dropping temperature was getting uncomfortably frigid. I mentally invited the spirits surrounding me to come along as I moved out of the officers’ quarters and headed across the parade grounds (personally I preferred to call it a bailey) for the fort’s kitchen. I felt like a teacher shepherding her herd as I entered the large vaulted room.

  Not feeling as cold as I was moments earlier, I decided to give the fort some attention before I gave it all to the spirits crowding the room around me. A plaque told me that the deep square holes built into the wall were the kitchen’s ovens. I took a moment to peer into them. They were nearly big enough to crawl into. Were they ever used? (Kade had the brochure so I couldn’t check to see). It was hard to imagine anyone actually cooking something in there.

  My back literally began to twitch with the feeling of someone standing close. I could almost imagine them breathing which was a silly thought because of course spirits didn’t breathe. Still, many of them mimicked habits long held while alive. I turned and faced the room, glad as I did so that none of them appeared before me as solid as Big Red had done a couple nights back.

  Straight ahead was a long tiered corridor where the Enlisted Quarters was located. Each open vaulted room was built slightly higher than the one before it. Kade mentioned earlier that the idea was for the heat of the kitchen ovens to float up along the open corridor and fill each of the rooms with heat. The room at the end, from what I could tell, was a considerable distance away. I couldn’t imagine any heat generated from the kitchen making it that far. Good thing none of these quarters were ever used. The poor souls assigned to the rooms farthest away would have frozen in their beds during Maine’s bitter cold winters. My understanding was that most of the troops who stayed here (some regiments were actually assigned here for a time) all slept in tents. Supposedly there were other buildings around the fort at one time but they were all gone now.

  I walked up to the next vaulted room which was the first of the Enlisted Quarters and stopped in a spot of sunlight coming through the windows facing the parade grounds. It felt quite lovely to bask in some warmth. Luckily there were few people about so I could make the attempt to communicate.

  “Who are you? What do you want from me? How can I help you?” I spoke each question quietly and at some space apart, alert for any mental or emotional response. Often when conversing with spirits, their voices filtered through my mind as sudden foreign thoughts, all of which were spoken in a tone different from my own internal voice. I knew the difference.

  It took a moment for me to quiet my own thoughts and as soon as I did, I sensed concern and confusion. These poor lost souls. What to do? Could they even hear me?

  Eyes closed, I lifted my head until I was nearly facing the ceiling. I envisioned myself as an open channel, allowing energy from spirit to flow down through me even as I filtered some of my own outward. Mentally I cast a psychic line and tried to locate the spirits hovering near. They maintained a respectful distance, their curiosity about me drawing them like the proverbial moths to flame. And in truth, the cliché fit for I was indeed like a lighted beacon to them. Their world was shrouded with darkness and confusion. I invited them into my light and felt a couple of them draw near.

  “You understand you are dead? Your body has died and now you must move on. Go without fear. Accept that you are in spirit and fear not. The light will encompass you and peace will come. I promise.” It was a typical speech for me to make when conversing with spirits. Oddly enough, many of them did not realize they were dead. A strange thought, I know, but a fact nonetheless. Another thing that held spirits back from moving on was fear. Perhaps they had it in their ‘head’ they were destined for hell. I could only imagine the life of a soul trapped in this limbo world I called the Tri-state. It had to be so confusing for them.

  Someone tapped me on the shoulder and I swung around, startled. No one was there, of course. Clever. “Yes, I know you are here. I am aware of you. You are real.” I sensed sometimes that these disembodied spirits wondered if they were ‘real’ anymore. It had to be a frightening state to be in when stuck between worlds…not of this one and yet not integrated into the next either.

  I tried to bring the restless spirit seeking my attention into mental focus, expanding my energy to encompass him and inviting him to enter my light. I could feel his essence as he drew closer and then our spirits, for a brief moment, intermingled and I was at once part of his memories and his confusion. Communications with the spirit world are often done entirely through emotions rather than words. Words are restrictive, emotions are not.

  I ‘talked’ with the spirit of a young man for only a few seconds and yet I shared all I knew in that brief moment of time, and he shared all of himself with me. It’s a strange feeling to be two people at the same time. And then he was gone. Hopefully, he had moved on in his spiritual journey. I could only hope this was so since I felt nothing more of him. Perhaps the other spirits hovering near witnessed our exchange and learned something from it. None of them, however, came near though I waited to see if the
y would. After a short while, I sensed the charged energy in the room dissipating.

  I spent a few more quiet moments sending loving energy to the confused and frightened spirits still hovering near then turned and headed for the parade grounds, the sunshine, warm air, and Kade. I found him perched on a parapet wall in the upper most tier of the fort sketching a cannon located on the grounds far below. It faced the river like an old forgotten dog gazing with forlorn sadness at the world passing by. Once a proud member of an impressive Battery, it now was the sole remainder of a bygone era.

  Kade glanced up and gave me a questioning look and when I nodded that I was fine, he bent his head and continued with his sketch. These silent communications spoke volumes to me. We were bonding, growing close and understanding each other. I had that with Mike to a degree. But not in the same way I shared it with Kade. I headed for the area above the bastion. It was such a great view. Bucksport was a nice location. I liked it here. Perhaps I’d stay longer.

  Kade eventually joined me and we made a leisurely stroll back to the car, stopping briefly to check out the visitor’s center before continuing on our way.

  Once we were belted in our seats and the car was started, Kade looked at me. “Where to now?”

  “I’d like to find the cemetery where the Rowan family is buried. Do you know how to get to Silver Lake?”

  Kade nodded. “I think so. I have a map of the area and studied it last night. Besides,” he pointed to his car’s GPS system. “This thing can get us just about anywhere.”

  “The convenience of modern invention.” We shared a smile, a look that quickly heated, and then I turned away to gaze out my window because I was afraid. Afraid of this amazing relationship building between Kade and myself. Really, what was there to be afraid of? What were the chances of having two men snatched from your life? It wasn’t a fair question and I couldn’t go through life thinking that way…but there it was. Feeling a little down at the thought, I let out a sigh loud enough that Kade heard.