“STOP!” She runs back over to me and throws her hand over my mouth. “Don’t Tucker.” The curls swing back and forth as she shakes her head violently. She’s not in love and the message she’s giving me is that’s not gonna change.
“Can we talk about this?” I reach my hand out but she doesn’t take it.
She shakes her head no and looks away.
The point she’s trying to make is painful and I’m not prolonging this any longer. “Tessa, we’re done? Just like that?”
“Yeah.” She nods then covers her mouth biting on a fingernail. Between the sunglasses and her hand I’m unable to see any of her face.
I look down at the ground struggling to find my voice for a second. “I’m sorry about that. Guess I should have followed the rules better.” I can’t stick around anymore. The tent, sleeping bags, I leave it all there. I need to get away from her. “Turns out you’re the one who doesn’t do relationships,” I state angrily as I walk away.
I’m shocked this is the way it ends for us, with me falling in love, giving my heart to someone for the first time only to have it handed back to me. For a brief second I think about contacting Ashley, but what would that do? Ashley can’t make her fall in love with me.
CHAPTER SIX
Text messages: None.
Inbox: Empty
Mark
“What happened? Where did you go last night?” I catch Cassie, in what I believe, is her escaping from her cabin extremely early to avoid me.
Her scared look at seeing me changes to a forced smile as she finishes walking down the stairs and greets me. “Bleh, yuck, let’s get this over with. Awkward. Friends who got drunk and had sex…embarrassing.”
I’m at a loss for a few seconds. “Excuse me?”
“Come on, Mark, don’t make this worse than it is. We need to shake it off and move on.” She covers her face and laughs. “Ah, we saw each other naked, good thing it was dark. But let’s not get all weird about it.”
“I have no idea why you’re acting this way Cassie but last night I told you I loved you. You told me you loved me.”
“Beer,” she says simply referring to the one partial beer she had.
I stand there wordless while she avoids any and all eye contact with me. A snicker escapes me from the ridiculousness that we’re back to this. After all we went through this summer we’re back where we started.
“Okay, I want to clarify something. I really do love you. And in case you’re wondering I’ve had no beer this morning.” I can tell by looking at her she isn’t prepared for my response.
Her foot drags lazily across the dirt. She stares at the ground and shrugs her shoulders. “I love you too. Just not like that. We’re friends.”
“Ahhh,” I let out the frustration building inside and run my hands over my head. “Cassie, everything between us that’s happened is more than friendship. From when we finally had our first kiss at the lake to the nights we’ve shared since then. God, Cassie. The whole year we spent together before we even came to this camp. Last night I thought we got there. Got to the point where we finally admitted once and for all the truth.”
“Mark, I’m sorry,” she says sadly shaking her head no, “but last night I was drunk, said some stupid things I shouldn’t have. You were my summer fling. And well, summer’s over.” She walks away leaving me stunned, hurt and speechless.
Tucker
Vinny hands me the necessary paper to sign myself out of camp. Another summer done.
“You think you’ll be back next year?” Vinny asks.
“No, this was my last year.” I extend my hand out and give him a firm handshake. “I’ll be back to visit though.”
“I didn’t see much of you this summer.”
I scratch my head. “It was a different summer. One I never saw coming. That’s for sure.”
“For you and me both. I think Julie and I are going to try and work things out. Being away from here should make things easier.”
“You’re probably right. I’m happy for you guys.” My chin dips and I ask the question I told myself I wasn’t gonna. “Was Tessa down here to sign out already, is she gone?”
“Yeah, she was here about twenty minutes ago. You two are the first ones. I think she was sad to go. She was a little teary eyed. Personally, I think she may have been too innocent for this place,” Vinny chuckles.
“She might have been.” No might about it. “Bye, Vin. Good luck with everything. I hope it works out for you and Julie.” I step out of the office. Before heading to my truck one last stop is required. I have a gut feeling.
There she sits. Up on the rock, the place I deemed “our spot” the first weekend here. Her eyes are once again hidden under sunglasses making them unreadable.
“I wasn’t sure if you were gone already.” I sit next down next to her dropping my duffel bag down at my feet.
“I couldn’t go without saying goodbye,” she says sadly.
“Tessa, this summer I opened my heart up. I’m sorry I couldn’t give you what you were looking for.”
She jumps up to her feet and stands in front of me, her arms wrap securely around my neck. “Tucker, you gave me more than I ever expected.” Her voice is still sad, her cheek presses against mine. I know she’s crying. I feel her tears on my face. “It’s not you, it’s me.”
She’s giving me the “It’s not you” speech. Hell, is this what it feels like to be on the other end of those words? I always thought that was a gentle way of letting someone down. It’s not. I reach up to her hands clasped tightly behind my neck and unlatch her fingers slipping them back down to her sides. “I gotta go. You take care. Be careful driving home. Don’t drive too fast.”
That’s it. I reach for my bag and walk away. It’s all I can handle.
Mark
My car is packed. I’m ready to leave this camp and the crazy, amazing, back to crazy summer that came with it. Cassie’s words still sting, but now that camp’s over, we’ll be able to think more clearly. I make one last trek up her steps to help carry her stuff to my car. A long car ride home with nowhere to run off to will give us a few hours to straighten everything out.
The door opens. “Mark, hey honey, you look great. How was your summer?” Mrs. Demarco stands before me smiling. Why is Cassie’s mom here?
“I’m surprised to see you here. Cassie didn’t tell me you were coming.”
“She didn’t? Hmm, that’s strange. She called me last weekend and asked if I would come down and pick her up. She said she had a lot of stuff to bring home and it wouldn’t all fit in your car.”
“Oh, you’re here to bring her home?” My mouth drops open, stunned that she would call her mom and not even tell me.
“Sweetheart, are you okay? Cassie didn’t mention any of this to you? I’m sorry.”
“Where is she now?”
“She ran down to the office to sign out.”
I don’t even say goodbye to Mrs. Demarco. I run down the hill to confront Cassie. I need to know why she’s doing this.
I spot her walking towards me. I can tell by looking at her she was planning on leaving without even saying goodbye to me.
“Why?” One word, it’s all that’s needed.
Cassie growls. She throws her hands in the air. “Because Mark, if we end it this way. There’s no heartbreak.”
“Why would there be heartbreak? ’Cause I’m leaving for school? That’s crazy. You come see me, I come see you. Simple.”
“I’ll be working. All the time. It’s not simple.”
“You’re making it hard.”
“Mark, trust me. It’s better this way.”
“You’re wrong, Cass.”
“Let’s just go back to the way it was. We’ll be friends like we were. You go to school. Have fun. Be crazy.”
“You can’t keep playing these games and expect to win. We both know how we feel. It’s out there. We said stuff. We did stuff. And we both meant it. But if this is the way you really want it. Fine.
Go ahead. Go home with your mom. Thanks for the summer fling.”
“How is this supposed to work, Mark? Huh? Tell me. We see each other at the holidays? A few weekend visits home hanging out in my family room. Oh yeah, and don’t forget all those sexy visits we’re going to have in your dorm,” she hollers sarcastically. “I don’t even have a car. How would I even get there?”
“Cassie, you’re being ridiculous. It would work. You think we’re the first couple to ever have a relationship while in two different places? It’s not like I’m gonna be gone forever.”
“Fine. Then we’ll wait. In four years when you graduate, if you still feel the same way maybe we can date then.” She backs away. “I gotta go. Have a safe trip home, Mark.”
“So now we’re back to waiting? Waiting for something to happen? Newsflash Cassie. It already did.”
“That’s just it. I don’t want you to wait. It’s time to move on, move forward. Don’t waste your college years waiting on some high school romance. Go have a good time. Have fun.”
“Okay.” I give up. I can see her mind is made up. “So what now? You go home with your mom. I go home and leave for school. When do I get to see you again?”
“I’m sure we’ll see each other.”
“When?”
She runs a hand through her hair and lets out a long sigh. “Goodbye, Mark.”
I watch her walk away, frozen in place until she disappears out of sight. I take one last look at the green grounds surrounding me.
“Goodbye, Cassie.”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Three months later.
Tucker
“This is from the blonde across the bar.” The bartender puts down a coaster and places a fresh bottle of beer in front of me.
I let myself be hopeful that the blonde he’s referring to is the one I’m still in love with. My eyes gaze across the bar and a blonde lifts up a beer bottle toasting me. Pretty. But she’s doesn’t interest me. I dip my head down in a curt nod thanking her for the drink.
All this time at school and I’ve only seen Tessa a few times from a distance. She’s done a good job avoiding me and I’ve done my own share of avoiding her. Too painful.
The blonde has not picked up on my disinterest and slides onto the stool next to mine. “Hey handsome, you here all by yourself?”
“My girlfriend is in the bathroom,” I say politely, hoping to brush her off gently.
“Maybe you should go check on her. I’ve seen you sitting here for the last hour all by your lonesome,” she challenges.
What’s the matter with this girl? Can’t she take a hint? Does she want her feelings hurt? “Listen, I’m not interested. But I’m sure if you keep searching there are plenty of guys here that are.”
“What’s the matter? My hair isn’t curly enough for you?” She cocks her head to the side and waits for my answer.
My head whips around to look at this girl more closely. Tanned, blonde, with a strong air of confidence. Oh hell, I should’ve known. “What are you doing here?”
“I was here visiting my friend. I think maybe you should too.”
“I think she made herself clear. That’s not what she wants.”
“I don’t think she made herself clear at all. I think you need to go over there and make sure this time she tells you what you want to hear.”
“What do you think I want to hear? Those feelings I had changed.” I take a swig of beer and try to remain collected.
She narrows her eyes and doesn’t do well hiding her smirk. I don’t know who I’m trying to kid. This girl isn’t fooled for a second. She knows too damn much.
“Tucker, please. If your feelings had changed, you would have been all over me.” She smacks my arm playfully, tosses a paper down on the bar and struts away.
So, that’s the infamous Ashley Simons. Pretty much what I pictured, she’s as cool as Tessa always made her out to be. Not sure how she found me but something tells me the girl is resourceful. I open the paper and see Ashley has written down Tessa’s dorm information.
Ashley must know something if she made it a point to see me.
On my way over to Tessa’s dorm I pass by the convenience store on campus. In a bucket next to the register they have individual roses wrapped in cellophane for three bucks. I run in, picking out the pinkest rose they have and pay for it. Outside the store I slip the pink rose out and toss it into the garbage, one sprig of baby’s breath remaining in the cellophane. I’m keeping it romantic.
I’m buzzed into the building and hurry down the hall to find Tessa’s room.
She opens the door and the sight of her standing there in my worn out t-shirt knocks the breath right out of me. In true Tessa style she takes a few seconds to look me up and down. Taking the cheap bouquet from my hand she jumps up and throws her arms around me. “Tucker!” she cries, before desperately pressing her lips to mine.
The overeager kisser I’ve missed so much is wrapped in my arms. I’m too lost in her to think straight. To get the words I want to say out. There is so much want in these kisses, but not the kind of want I’m used to. It’s more of a need. I need this girl. The way she’s kissing me, I know she needs me too.
“Tessa,” I say my mouth still up against hers. “What went wrong? Why didn’t you want to be with me?”
“I do want to be with you, Tucker. Please, don’t stop kissing me.”
We move into her dorm room and close the door behind us. We’re together again. I spend the rest of the night making up for all the kisses we’ve missed.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Mark
I place an expensive detailed order over the phone, paying in full with my credit card. A pricey pink treat it would take all day to make. Fortunately my request happens to be the specialty of one of the people who works there. I arranged for it to be ready for pickup by six p.m., but walk into the bakery at six a.m.
“Hey Mark, what are you doing here? You home already? I thought you wouldn’t be home until next week for Thanksgiving.” Mr. DeMarco greets me from behind the counter.
“I’m just home for a little bit, was hoping I could talk to Cassie if she’s got a minute.”
“Yeah, sure thing.” Mr. DeMarco swings open the door to the kitchen. “Cass,” he yells, “Come in the front. You got a visitor.”
She comes walking through the door wiping her hands on the front of her apron, startled when she sees me standing there. “Mark, hey, why are you here at,” she looks over at the clock, “six o’clock in the morning?”
“I wanted to see if you were able to hang out today.”
“Today? I can’t. I’m working.”
“You can’t even get away for a little while?”
“No, I have a big order for a cake. It’s going to take me all day.”
“Or you would hang out with me? You know if you didn’t have to make that cake? The only reason I ask is because every time I’ve called you or stop by you’re too busy to talk or see me. I’m starting to wonder if you’re avoiding me.”
Cassie glances over at her father who’s leaning on the counter watching us. “No, I’m not avoiding you. Really, you can ask my dad, I have a special order today or I would definitely hang out.”
“I hoped you’d say that, because the cake, it’s for me, I ordered it. Now that I think about it, I think I’d rather have that one.” I point to a chocolate frosted cake on the top shelf behind the glass.
“The cake you ordered and paid for was much more expensive than that one. I’m afraid we don’t give refunds,” she huffs, annoyed by my scheme.
“We’ll call it even.” I shrug. “Looks like you’re not that busy now. We can hang out.”
“I can’t, my dad still needs me here to work.”
“No, you can go.” Her father’s still leaning on the counter, taking us in, a bit amused. “Besides I’ve been begging you take some time off to go out and have some fun.”
“Great,” I grin at Cassie. “Let’s go have some fun.”
“Why are you so mad?” I ask her once we’re in my car. “Is it that bad I want to see you and hang out and talk?”
“We talk all the time.”
“No, I call you all the time, but we never talk. On the rare occasion you answer your phone or bother to return a text message it’s usually just to tell me how busy you are. I haven’t really seen or talked to you since the last day at camp. We need to talk.”
No reply. She pulls the clip from her hair still lightened with streaks of blonde. The sweet-smelling scent from the damp hair fills the car.
“So where are we going?” she finally says.
“Nowhere that great I just spent four hundred dollars on a cake.” I grin at her and she actually smiles and lets out a little laugh, lifting some of the tension.
“So tell me all about school. Are you having fun?” she asks.
“School is good. Not that much fun.”
“Why not? I thought you’d be having so much fun.”
“All that fun you wanted me to have, that you thought you’d be blocking. I’m not having it. Because the fun I want to be having at school, I want you to be a part of it. Without you in my life there’s no way I’m able to have fun. Fun is when I’m with you.”
“Mark.” She starts with the squirming and ringing her hands. “How could it work? We’re both busy, and you’re so far away. I’ll probably never be able to visit you at school. I mean, really, how would I even get there?”
“Where do you think we’re going right now? I imagined when I merged on the turnpike that would have tipped you off.”
“We’re going to your school?” Her back goes straight and she looks out the car window as if she’s just noticing where we are. “That’s so far away, how long will we be gone?”
Wait (The Fast Series) Page 17