The Complex

by Courtney McPhail

  “I talked to Angela last night, we’re on the same page now. I have to talk to Veronica today.” He yanked up his jeans with more force than necessary, grumbling under his breath. “I’ve got no idea what to say to her. I get why she did what she did. If I had been in her place and one of the kids was missing, I’d lose it too.”

  Kim felt the same. She would go to the ends of the earth to protect her son. If she thought something bad had happened to him, she didn’t know what she would do.

  Yet, she was also felt a bit scared of Veronica. She might understand her but she also knew that Veronica had shown herself as a possible risk to the rest of them. There was nothing to say that Veronica wouldn’t turn on one of them if she thought there was a danger. Kim hated thinking that way. She had come to see Veronica as a good friend. They had been through a lot together but, still, she wasn’t sure she could fully trust her.

  “She knows she made a mistake and I don’t want her to be punished but I’m worried about her. Can we trust her to make the right decisions when things get bad?”

  Malcolm looked at her silently for a moment, the corner of his mouth turning up in a slight smile.

  “What?”

  “You remember back in the park, you told me you wanted me to teach you how to be a soldier?”

  “I remember.”

  He rubbed a hand over his chin. “Seems like it worked. You’re thinking like a soldier, it looks good on you.”

  He finished buttoning his shirt. “I’ll talk to her, feel her out to see what’s going on in her head. Right now we’ve got building that tower to keep us busy on the island. We aren’t going over to the mainland for a while so we don’t have to worry about her out there.”

  “It’s not strangers I’m worried about. Elaine told me what she was like,” Kim told him. “I’m worried about her going after one of us.”

  “She went after Harold. Angela was just a reaction. As much as I talk about all of us being a group, there is still that divide between their group and ours.” He shook his head ruefully. “See, even I see them separate.”

  Kim couldn’t blame him. She was willing to give Angela, Harold and the rest of the CIA group a chance and she was open to one day coming to see them as family, but they weren’t there yet.

  Not like the others, the ones who had stood by her on the road, who had felt her losses, it was different.

  Yet she was still afraid of Veronica.

  “I just worry that after the stress that she’s gone through, she might be cracking.” She felt a pang of guilt for voicing her fears, not wanting to think bad thoughts about her friend. “I wouldn’t blame her. Everything we’ve gone through, it’s a miracle none of us have lost it yet."

  Malcolm nodded in agreement. “We’ll keep an eye on her and I’ll talk to her about it. I’ve also got to talk to her brother. We’ve got to sort out this lying business with Harold. Not looking forward to that though, he might not take too kindly to talking to me after what happened with Janet.”

  She frowned. “What happened with Janet?”

  His eyebrows raised in surprise. “You didn’t hear? Janet ended things with Quinton. She really didn’t say anything to you?”

  “Nothing.”

  Thinking back on the night, she realized she hadn’t actually talked to Janet. She’d been occupied with working out the cabin arrangements with Elaine for their new arrivals and Janet had been looking after her kids. Now that she considered it, Janet had been quieter than usual last night. Normally, she’d have been involved in sorting out the arrangements, naturally inclined to pitch in and help.

  “Do you know why?” Kim asked.

  “Because he knew about Glen and didn’t tell her. She was pissed when she told me. I’m worried she did something out of anger that she might regret.”

  “I’ll check in with her,” Kim said. Of course, she wanted to make sure her friend was okay, but she also needed to make sure that Janet’s anger wouldn’t boil up into something worse. If yesterday had taught her anything, it was that managing relationships was an essential part of surviving here.

  “You know, you had a point before. I’d really rather stay here today,” she sighed and he laughed, pulling her into a kiss.

  “Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time to do that in the winter,” he told her. “I asked Darren what the winters are like up here. Lots of snow and way colder than we’re used to in Virginia. We’re gonna be sick of each other by the end of it.”

  She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him passionately, nipping at his bottom lip. “We could be locked up in here for a hundred years and I would never get tired of you.”

  His hands slid down her back and continued on to cup her ass as he pulled her against his solid chest. He kissed her until they were both panting for breath.

  “You know what?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. “It won’t matter if we get a late start. What do you say we figure out if we can both fit in that shower?”

  She reached down and grabbed his ass, giving the tight globes a squeeze. “Sounds good to me.”

  Subject File #749

  Administrator: I should probably tell you that I already know about the break up. So how are you doing?

  Subject: Fine.

  Administrator: You don’t sound fine and those daggers you’re glaring at me don’t give off a fine vibe either.

  Subject: It is what it is. I made the right call for my kids and they are the only ones who matter to me.

  As Janet sat on the back deck of the lodge, sipping her coffee, all she could think about was wanting a cigarette. She had quit a year before the twins were born and had only gone back to them when Eric died. The stress had had been too much and she had needed to relaxing feel of nicotine racing through her veins. It had only lasted a few months before she had given them up again, not needing the addiction to cope anymore.

  It was probably a good thing she couldn’t easily get her hands on them anymore, she’d already be through a pack today.

  She’d been on breakfast duty this morning so she had no choice but to come to the lodge. Had she been off rotation, she might have been able to snag some food and convince the children to eat in their cabin. It was weak, she knew, but she didn’t care. She wasn’t ready to face Quinton yet. Thankfully last night he had avoided the lodge but she wasn’t sure she’d be so lucky today.

  She’d been quick about making breakfast, getting plates for the kids and then fleeing out back. Maybe if she stayed out here long enough, she’d miss him.

  Someone appeared behind the screen door and her heart jumped into her throat, thinking it was Quinton. She only relaxed when the door swung open and Kim stood there. She had a cup of coffee in her hand and a curious look on her face.

  “Morning,” she said as she joined her on the deck. “What are you doing out here?”

  “Just needed a break,” she replied. “I didn’t sleep so well last night.”

  “You want to talk about it?”

  “It’s nothing.”

  She knew that eventually everyone would know. It was too small of a place for people not to notice and figure it out, but she wasn’t sure she was ready to talk about it.

  “Janet, it’s not good to keep these things bottled up, you know that.”

  She had a point. It was like a bandaid, just rip it off quick and be done with it.

  “I ended things with Quinton yesterday.”

  Kim’s dark eyes didn’t show any surprise and Janet realized her friend had already heard. She should have known it would get out quickly.

  “Did he already tell everyone?”

  Kim shook her head. “At least I don’t think. Malcolm told me. Are you okay?”

  “He lied to me,” Janet replied, tears pricking at her eyes. She fought them back, swallowing the lump in her throat. She was sick and tired of crying. “He knew that Harold was keeping that freak and he didn’t tell me.”

  Kim set her mug down on the railing and put a hand on Janet’s
arm, rubbing soothingly.

  “I know what happened was upsetting. I’m still skeeved out when I think about it being down there but are you sure you want to finish with Quinton over it?”

  “If my brother had kept that secret from you, would you forgive him?” Janet asked.

  Kim took a moment to consider her question before she nodded. “I can’t say for certain. It would hurt if he had kept that secret from me but if he had a good reason...”

  Janet shook her head and clucked her tongue in annoyance. “There’s no good reason to lie. I want total honesty--I need it--and Quinton knew that. This wasn’t some white lie, this was something that could have affected my children’s lives. I can’t have that in my life...in their lives.”

  Kim nodded, the understanding of a fellow mother in her eyes. “If this is what you want, then I’ve got your back. He’s already been through for breakfast then grabbed Travis and took him to the clinic to look at his arm.”

  She let out a sigh of relief. She had managed to avoid him...for now.

  “I’ve told him to stay away from the kids,” she said. “Did he do that?”

  “I didn’t see him talk to them,” Kim said, frowning, “But are you sure you can manage to keep him away? It’s a small island. I can help you run interference but we can’t keep it up forever. Plus, your kids like him.”

  That was a problem. The kids did like Quinton. They liked spending time with him and she was taking that away from them. She hated herself for it and she had nobody to blame but herself. She had been the one stupid enough to bring him into their lives. She should have known better. She had let lust and her own selfish needs come before the wellbeing of her children and now they would get hurt.

  “God, I was so stupid,” she berated herself. “I never should have let him get this close.”

  Kim frowned at her. “You aren’t stupid. You can’t help your feelings. Look at where we are, what we’ve been through. It makes sense that you would want to find comfort with someone. You were happy and you wanted him to be a part of your life and that included your children. It was completely natural for you to want that.”

  “But look at what it turned out to be,” she said. “I didn’t think things through. If I did, I would have realized this could happen and I would have stayed far away.”

  “Even if you had realized it, you might have still taken the chance.”

  Janet wanted to tell her she was wrong but the truth was she had felt a pull towards Quinton from the moment she met him. Even with her anger fresh and at the surface, there was still a part of her that wanted to be with him. But she had to fight that part of her, let her anger take over and fuel her. She had her children to think about.

  “It doesn’t matter. It is what it is. He’s out of our lives.”

  Kim gave her a look.

  “Okay, I know that it’s not realistic,” she admitted. “They are going to be around each other but I don’t want him going out of his way to spend time with them. I don’t trust him with them and he knows it.

  Kim took a moment to sip her coffee in silence, her eyes darting to Janet a few times, as if she was trying to decide whether or not to believe her.

  “Well, if that’s your decision, I will support you.”

  “It is,” Janet replied, firm in her choice.

  “Then we might as well go back in. The kids will be done now and eager to go to the garden.”

  Banks and Trey were already on dish duty in the kitchen, which meant breakfast was wrapping up. Sure enough, when they entered the dining room, Malcolm was already going over the day’s plans.

  “I want to get the concrete poured today for the foundations,” he said as Janet and Kim slid into seats at the children’s table, “So we’re going to need as many people as we can get out there digging today.”

  Matthew turned his attention from his uncle to his mother. “Me and Mark can help, right Mom? We’re strong enough to dig.”

  For a moment, she was ready to spit out a no, knowing that Quinton would be out there working with them, but she fought it back as the boys grinned at her hopefully. They wanted to help their uncle, who they adored, and she would be a bitch if she refused.

  “If you two want to, of course,” Janet said.

  “What about me?” Ruthie asked, always eager to tag along with her older brothers, but she was a bit too small for the work.

  “You and me have to help Jenny with the garden,” Janet told her. Ruthie was happy with that and turned her attention back to the last of her breakfast.

  “We’ll keep to the regular watch schedule for the three other watch points,” Malcolm continued. “If the rest of us work together, we can get the foundations done before dinner. We’ve just got to work together.”

  He sighed, rubbing his hand over his chin before he spoke. “Look, I know yesterday was a hell of a rollercoaster. We had some great things happen. We welcomed back an old friend and some new friends. We found new allies out there, people like us who are surviving. We also had some bad things happen yesterday.”

  Janet glanced over to Veronica, who was seated with Jackson and the girls, her head down as she stared at her lap. Her gaze shifted to Angela, sitting between Mendez and Nas, her eyes on Malcolm.

  “But we’ve got to put that bad stuff aside,” Malcolm continued. “The one thing all of us have in common is that we want to make this place safe. We’ve all seen what’s out there, that’s the real threat to us. Today we’re gonna come together and get that tower up so we can protect ourselves.”

  As the others nodded, Janet watched Angela’s gaze slide over to Veronica, her expression unreadable as she stared at the woman. Veronica’s eyes were still downcast, making her oblivious to Angela’s stare. Mendez whispered in Angela's ear and she nodded, finally turning away from Veronica.

  The room filled with the sound of chairs being pushed back as everyone got up, ready to get to work. Janet watched over the children as they gathered up their dirty dishes and ran them to the kitchen, glad to see that their manners hadn’t been lost. As she waited on them to come back, Malcolm came up beside her.

  “The boys are going to help you at the tower,” she told him. “I know you want everybody on the digging but Jenny will need someone to do the water run for the garden. Plus, Ruthie can’t help at the tower and I don’t want her to be in the way or foist her off on Jenny all day.”

  All her excuses were completely legit but she still felt a pang of guilt as she listed them off. She knew the truth was she just wanted an excuse to keep far away from Quinton today.

  “It’s all good,” he told her. “Raquel is going to help you guys today. She worked at a nursery and has experience with plants and greenhouses. She’s going to look over our setup.”

  “I can come by later if you need help at the tower,” she offered but he shook his head.

  “Don’t worry about it. I get it.”

  He pulled her into a hug and she settled into the familiar security of her older brother’s arms. Of course he would understand and he wouldn’t make her feel a lick of guilt about it.

  “You want me to beat him up?” he asked her and she laughed, pulling back to smile up at him. Yep, that was her big brother.

  “No, he’s our only doctor, we can’t risk him,” she said, “But it’s sweet of you to offer.”

  “If you change your mind, you let me know,” Malcolm said, squeezing her one last time, “And if you need anything else, you let me know. I’ve always got your back.”

  “I never doubt it.”

  When the kids came out of the kitchen, Janet picked up Ruthie as Malcolm herded off the boys. They were already wondering if they’d find buried pirate treasure out on cliffs and asking about who got to keep it if they did.

  “You ready to garden baby?”

  Ruthie grinned at her. “Let’s do it, Mama.”

  The cloud of sadness that had been hanging around her broke as she looked at her daughter, the echoes of her sons’ excited laught
er still in her ears. It was hard to be sad when her children were happy. She wasn’t alone in this and that felt good. It made her broken heart just a little more bearable.

  Subject File #750

  Administrator: Though subject seven- five-zero has continued to refuse to meet, I am reopening the file to make note of observations I have made. My initial assessment that she would continue to prove to be a threat was incorrect. According to subject seven-four-one, she has chosen to make amends for her actions. The file will remain open for any further observations this Administrator might witness.

  Veronica took a moment to prepare herself before she knocked on the door. She could hear the muted voices of Quinton and Travis down the hall in the exam room. She felt a little better knowing she wasn’t all alone here. Not that she felt she was in any real danger. She just liked the idea that her brother was in the other room for emotional back up if she needed it.

  Her hands tightened around the tray she was holding, her stomach turning at the smell that drifted up from the fried meat. It was silly really, she had eaten the same breakfast only twenty minutes before but now it was sitting like a lead ball in her stomach.

  Elaine had been preparing the tray to bring to Harold in the lab but Veronica had caught her before she left with it. She had explained herself and Elaine had happily handed over the tray with a nod of approval. She needed to apologize and make things right with him. Best to get it done with now.

  The electronic lock beeped and she stepped back as the door swung open. Harold stood there, hands out, anticipating the tray but she saw the moment he realized she was holding it instead of Elaine. His eyes grew wide behind his thick lens and his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat. He took a step back on the stairs as if he was going to flee back down to the lab.

  “Wait,” she said. “I’m not here to hurt you. I’m here to apologize.”

  He blinked and pushed his glasses up his nose.

  “What I did to you was wrong. I am sorry for all of it and I promise it will never happen again. I understand if you can’t forgive me and you have every right to tell me to screw off. I just want you to feel safe here.”