The Wind in His Heart

by Charles de Lint

  Jerry gives me a look like he wants to punch me in the face.

  “You know,” Calico says, “I’m beginning to understand why her father dumped her in the desert.”

  I nod. “Yeah, this just gets better and better.”

  “Just shut up, you sick freak,” Jerry says.

  I hold up my hands. “Hey, she’s all yours.” I look from Reuben to Calico. “Anyone volunteering to take them back?”

  “No!” Sadie cries. “I’m not going back to him.”

  Jerry pats her shoulder. “Don’t worry. I won’t let your father or anybody else hurt you again. You’ll be under police protection until we get all this straightened out.”

  “Yeah, good luck with that,” I say.

  Calico steps up. “I’ll take them back.”

  I nod. “And then we need to get going.”

  “You won’t get away with this,” Jerry tells me, like repeating it is going to make it happen. “Don’t think you won’t pay for what you did.”

  “Somebody’s going to pay,” I agree.

  The long day and night are catching up to me and I feel exhausted. All I want to do is get back to the trailer and shut the world away.

  Possum was right. I should have turned away when I saw this girl dumped on the side of the road and never gotten myself involved. Except who am I kidding? I had to do what I could, no matter how it played out. I just hope to hell my good turn doesn’t mess it up for anybody else.

  “Do yourself a favour,” I tell Jerry. “Don’t let her take you down with her.”

  Reuben nods in agreement. “You’re going to regret playing the big hero, Jerry.”

  “What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”

  “You’ll find out,” I say. “My advice? Try not to be alone with her because that’s going to come back and bite you on the ass.”

  Calico steps forward, offering a hand to each of them. Jerry reaches out to take her hand with a resigned look in his eyes, but Sadie backs away. I realize she’s going to take off and I give a mental shrug. I’m beyond caring about that kid anymore. Let her run. But then we hear a dog bark and Sadie freezes.

  Aggie’s red dog appears, running out of the heat haze that makes the desert scrub to the west look all wavy. Behind Ruby we see Aggie approaching with a pair of white women that I don’t recognize, one blond, the other dark-haired.

  The fair-haired woman is very pale, her palm on her belly, looking like she’s about to throw up, but as they get closer she seems to recover. I twig to what she was feeling. It’s a good thing it doesn’t last long.

  Sadie shrinks away from Ruby when the dog pads over to her.

  “Get away,” Jerry says to the dog. He’s still in protector mode.

  The dog sits on her haunches and looks at him with a cocked head. She gives a bark and Calico laughs. “Yeah,” she says to the dog. “He is wound pretty tight.”

  Aggie and her companions reach us.

  “Who’s wound tight?” Aggie asks.

  Ruby barks again.

  “Oh, he’s been like that ever since he went off to the police academy,” Aggie says. “He’s just never been able to get himself grounded again.”

  “Standing right here,” Jerry says.

  Aggie smiles. “So you are. Ohla, Jerry Five Hawks. How’s your mother?”

  “She’s fine.”

  “And your sister? Is she still working at that gallery in Phoenix?”

  “She’s fine too. Aunt Aggie, what are you doing here?”

  Aggie looks at Sadie. “Well, somebody used my computer to send an image of one of my paintings to Leah here.” She nods to the dark-haired woman. “I wanted to find out if it was Sadie.”

  “How would she be using your computer?”

  “She was staying with me.”

  “Hold on, now,” Jerry says.

  While they’re talking, the blonde has been studying Sadie with interest, but the dark-haired woman doesn’t even look at the girl. Instead, she seems weirdly transfixed on me.

  “What do you mean, she was staying with you?” Jerry asks.

  “I was not,” Sadie says. “I don’t even know any of these women.”

  “I’m Marisa,” the blonde says cheerfully, lifting a hand.

  Nobody pays her any attention.

  Aggie’s eyebrows go up. “Of course she does—well, she knows me at least, and my hospitality.” She gives Sadie a pointed look then returns her attention to Jerry. “What are you doing here, Jerry?”

  “Sadie was kidnapped by Steve and Reuben, and I’m trying to get her back. She also says that Steve raped her.”

  The dark-haired woman—I think Aggie called her Leah—draws her head back in a puzzled frown.

  “That’s ridiculous,” Aggie says. “Steve found her out on Zahra Road after her father threw her out of his car. He brought her to me while we waited to see if Morago could find her a spot in the school.”

  “It’s a serious accusation, so I still have to investigate,” Jerry says.

  “Of course you do,” Aggie says.

  She turns to Sadie, her face softening. “Child, I’m sorry it had to come to this. You must be so ungrounded, to repay the good turn that was done to you with these lies.”

  “I’m not lying. You’re lying.”

  Aggie nods. “Have you shown him the bruises from when your father hit you, and the scars of your self-inflicted cuts?”

  Sadie points to Jerry. “He’s going to protect me—from all of you.”

  “That’s good to hear. Perhaps he’ll also be able to protect you from yourself.”

  “Can you take them back?” I ask Aggie.

  “Of course.”

  “Then we’ll be going,” I say.

  Except before we can leave, Leah steps up to me, her eyes still filled with wonder. “You’re really you. Jackson Cole. I can’t believe it.”

  I find a smile. “Now, I haven’t heard that in a while. I used to get it all the time, forty years or so ago, back when I was a lot younger and Jackson was still alive. ’Course, having the same surname as my famous cousin didn’t help. Personally, I never saw the resemblance like others did.”

  She turns to her friend Marisa. “It’s really him.”

  “Nice to meet you, ma’am,” I say, letting my drawl deepen. “Good luck, Jerry.”

  Then I’m walking away with Calico on one side, Reuben on the other.

  “Are you just going to let them walk away?” I hear Sadie ask.

  “Don’t worry,” Jerry says. “This isn’t finished.”

  33

  Leah

  There was no question in Leah’s mind that it had really been Jackson Cole. Older, sure, but not nearly as much as one would expect. For one thing, there was no grey in his light brown hair. He was slightly grizzled and his skin leather-browned from the sun, but he was aging gracefully—still as handsome as ever, and very much alive. And it wasn’t only his features that gave him away. She’d listened to hundreds of interviews and rehearsal tapes. That was definitely his voice.

  And now—after all these years of having a head full of questions to ask him, after the impossibility of his still being alive right in front of her—he was simply walking away.

  She gave Marisa a helpless look.

  And what was this drama they’d walked into? None of Sadie’s accusations jibed with her own mental picture of Cole, formed from listening to his music and interviewing people who’d known him. Aggie’s version of what had happened was far more in line with what she supposed Cole was really like. But could she really trust those suppositions? Leah had never actually met the man. She’d never been inside his head. Everything she knew was secondhand from talking to those who’d known him, and poring over lyrics and interviews.

  “We need to get back, Aunt Aggie.” Jerry said. “Will you take us now?”

  “Of course,” the old woman said.

  She offered her hands to them. Marisa and Leah joined hands, then Leah took Aggie’s, but suddenly Sa
die bolted. The red dog went charging after her, nipping at her heels and herding her back to where they waited.

  “Get that thing away from me,” Sadie pleaded. “You don’t understand. Reggie’s going to kill me.”

  “Nobody’s killing anybody,” Jerry said. “And we’ll have a better chance of figuring things out once we get out of this place.”

  He grabbed Sadie’s hand, then reached for Aggie’s outstretched left palm.

  “It won’t be as bad this time,” Aggie told Marisa.

  Leah hadn’t felt anything when they’d crossed over before, but the nausea had hit Marisa hard. This time, Leah stayed close to Marisa in case she needed support. Marisa’s features were white as they arrived in the glaring light of the parking lot of the tribal police station, but she waved off Leah’s hovering.

  “I’m okay,” she said. “Just a little queasy again.”

  “Aunt Aggie,” Jerry said. “I have another favour to ask of you. Will you stay with us until someone from Children’s Services can get here?”

  Aggie nodded, then turned to the women. “Can you find your own way back to your car?”

  “If we have to,” Marisa said. “But if it’s okay, we’ll stick around. We might be able to help since we work with kids back home in Newford.”

  Leah was too distracted to respond. She was looking in the direction that Jackson Cole and his companions had walked, except instead of empty desert, she saw a road leading up to the rez and the ranches and farms that lay between the station and the foothills.

  Jackson and the others were nowhere in sight. Not in this world.

  The dog came up beside her and leaned against her leg. Absently, Leah stroked its red fur.

  “Or perhaps I should say,” Marisa went on, “I’ll stay on. I think Leah’s got somewhere else to be.”

  Leah lifted her head, brought back to the present moment. “What?” she said.

  Marisa smiled. “I’m thinking you need to go after Jackson Cole—or whatever he calls himself here.”

  “It’s too late for that now,” Leah said, her shoulders slumped. “I’d never find him again.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Oh, come on,” Leah said. “It’d be bad enough if he’d just walked off into the desert, but now he’s in some whole other world.” She shook her head. “I can’t believe it. He was standing right in front of me and I just let him walk away.”

  “It’s frustrating,” Marisa agreed. “That’s why you should go after him.”

  Aggie nodded. “And contrary to what little miss here has been saying, you’ll be perfectly safe. Steve keeps to himself, but he’s got a big heart. You’d be hard pressed to find someone on the rez he hasn’t helped—” she looked pointedly at the police officer, “—including your uncle, Jerry.”

  The cop flushed and looked away.

  “But I wouldn’t know where to begin.” Leah said. “Crossing over and figuring out where he’s gone.”

  “Ruby can take you and track him down.”

  Leah gave the dog a dubious look.

  “We flew all the way here,” Marisa said. “You wanted a story. This is a story.”

  Leah sighed. “Except I’m not sure I want to write it anymore,” she said.

  Marisa nodded. “Maybe you only feel that way now. The one thing I do know is that you need to have an actual conversation with him. If you don’t deal with this while you can, it’s going to nag at you forever.”

  “You’re right, I know. It’s just…” Leah looked over at Aggie. “Is he or isn’t he Jackson Cole? And what did he mean about his famous cousin?”

  Now that she thought on it, she recalled that Jackson did have a cousin who’d been part of the band’s extensive entourage. She couldn’t remember his name or what he’d looked like. When she tried to picture him, a beard and a ball cap were all that came to mind. She was pretty sure he’d been a roadie or a guitar tech, and she remembered trying to track him down for an interview because supposedly, he’d been the one who first taught Jackson how to play guitar. But she’d never been able to connect with him.

  Could the man from Aggie’s painting be Jackson’s cousin?

  “I only know Steve as Steve,” Aggie said. “He’s never talked to me about family. Who knows who he was before he came to the Painted Lands?”

  “Aunt Aggie?” Jerry said. “I really need to get things rolling here.”

  The old woman nodded, but her attention remained fixed on Leah.

  “Okay,” Leah said. “I’ll give it a shot.” Her gaze went to the dog, then back to Aggie. “What do I do?” she added. “Hold her paw?”

  Aggie laughed. “No. Just rest your hand on her shoulders and let her walk you back across. Her name’s Ruby.”

  “And she knows where to go?”

  “She will, once she crosses over.” The older woman stepped closer and tapped Leah lightly on the forehead. “Don’t think so much.”

  That was easy for her to say—this was all old hat for her. Even Marisa seemed nonplussed. Leah felt she was more in the cop’s camp on this aspect of it. From his eyes she could tell he was quietly freaking out on the inside, the same as she was.

  But all she said was, “Okay.”

  Marisa came over and gave her a hug. “Chance of a lifetime, kiddo,” she whispered in her ear. “No matter what happens, have you got a story.”

  There was that.

  Leah gave Marisa a quick smile then laid her hand on the red fur between Ruby’s shoulders. “Here goes nothing,” she said as she let the dog walk her back into the otherworld.

  “Or here comes everything,” she heard Marisa say as she left the police station behind and was back in the magical desert.

  34

  Jerry Five Hawks

  This was officially the worst day of Deputy Jerry Five Hawks’ life, and he’d had more than his share of bad days. What really bugged him was he should be feeling good. He’d rescued the girl. Bottom line, her safety had come first. So that was a win. A big win. For himself as well as for the police department. Except right now, he wasn’t sure she’d ever needed rescuing.

  All he wanted to do was go home and put this day behind him. He’d been on duty for almost eighteen hours with no end in sight, and the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach hadn’t come only from the nausea he’d experienced during the impossible passage between the worlds. He stuffed that in a corner of his mind to deal with later, because the reality of the otherworld was the tip of a whole other iceberg that he wasn’t ready to face. Right now, he was trying to deal with the idea he was pretty sure he was on the wrong side of all of this, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.

  Thinking that, looking at the girl, made him feel a whole other side of bad. Here on the rez, he’d seen too many cases of abuse dismissed, and he didn’t want to be guilty of not acting on her behalf. But considering the way the girl kept embellishing her story, how it didn’t quite fit with Sammy’s version, and what he knew of the men she was accusing, he wasn’t sure that you could pin these atrocities on Reuben and Steve. Reuben was the tribe’s War Leader, for Christ’s sake, chosen by the Women’s Council, and Steve… Well, Steve had been a fixture on the rez for as long as he could remember. Kept to himself a lot, but was always ready to lend a helping hand. Easygoing, mild-spoken.

  It was hard to see either of them through the girl’s eyes. But if they were guilty, how was he supposed to deal with criminals when they could just walk away into another world and there was nothing he could do to stop them?

  In the end, he could only do what he always did in uncertain situations: follow protocol.

  “Aunt Aggie?” he said. “We need to get things rolling here.”

  He waited until the old woman finished talking to the two white women, then tried to quell the uneasy roll in his stomach when the dark-haired one and Aggie’s dog vanished back into the otherworld.

  Don’t try to figure it out, he told himself as he led Sadie into the station.
Aggie and the blond woman—her name was Marisa, he remembered—followed behind. Ralph Long Ridge was on duty and looked up in surprise to see them coming through the door. His gaze went toward the room where Jerry had been taking statements from Reuben and Steve a few minutes ago, then back to Jerry coming in the front door.

  “Where’d you come from?” Ralph asked. “I never even saw you leave.”

  “I went out the back. I need you to call Child Services and ask them to send somebody down here.” He glanced to see where Sadie was, then added in a lower voice, “Tell them to send a nurse, too, and have her bring a rape kit.”

  “Why—”

  Jerry didn’t let him finish. “I also need you to put out an all points on Reuben Little Tree and Steve Cole, AKA…”

  His voice trailed off. Did he really want to go there? To give credence to the idea of Jackson Cole being still alive, alias Steve Cole, was going to take this investigation into the crazy world of supermarket tabloids. Although what he’d already experienced this morning was worse than any Elvis sighting.

  Ralph was waiting for him to finish, pen in hand.

  “Just the two of them,” Jerry said. “I need to call the chief.”

  Ralph nodded. “Roger that.”

  But first, Jerry had to get Sadie settled until the people from Child Services could get here. After that he’d call the chief.

  He had Aggie lead the girl into the next room. Marisa came along, looking around herself with interest. He wanted to ask her what she knew about all of this, but reminded himself: follow protocol.

  “I don’t want to be in here,” Sadie said. “Not with her.” She pointed at Aggie.

  “It’s just for a few minutes,” he told her. “You’ll be perfectly safe.”

  “Am I under arrest?”

  Jerry blinked. “What for?”

  “So you can’t keep me here? I can just leave?”

  He shook his head. “I need you to stay here until somebody from Child Services shows up. They’ll explain all your options.”

  He waited until she took a seat, her body stiff with reluctance. Aggie pulled a chair back from the table and set it so that she was facing the girl. Marisa was studying the topographical map on the wall.