Whisper Forever

by C. A. Harms

  “I need some independence and—”

  She lifted her hand. “And I know.” She waved it dismissively and shook her head. “You need privacy. It’s difficult bringing Maddy back here for a romp when your parents are right down the hall.”

  Did my mother just say romp? I was both shocked and a bit embarrassed.

  “What are you looking at me like that for?” she asked. “I may be older, but son, I’m not dead. I know what the sounds of squeaking springs and heavy panting indicate. Hell, I stood outside that door for over a minute knocking the other night and neither of you heard me.”

  Ah hell. I hung my head, feeling my cheeks heat. Now I knew exactly how Madelyn felt when Liam found us.

  “I decided to walk away and let you two finish your business,” she added and I gave her a confused glance. “But when you hollered out in pain, I had no choice but to check on you.”

  I probably shouldn’t mention that I didn’t cry out like that from any form of pain. I’d just let her think what she wanted to think here. But this was yet another reason I needed my own place.

  “Sorry about that, Ma.” I didn’t know what else to say.

  “You are young and you have needs—”

  “Nope,” I said in a hurry, waving my hand in her direction. “We don’t need to discuss my needs.” Hell no.

  “But, Lucas, I understand—”

  I couldn’t take it. I walked out of the room only for her to follow close behind. “I know men your age have an appetite for—”

  I spun around to face her and she halted only a few feet away.

  “I am not talking about my ‘appetite,’” I said with a stern look. “It’s all good, Ma. Really. We can stop right there.”

  The last thing I want to do was share information about my sexual “appetite” with my mother.

  “Okay,” she said, holding her hands up in surrender. “I just wanted you to know I understand your need for the occasional fornication,” she offered a wink, and my stomach rolled.

  Fornication? Oh my hell. I shivered as an image of her and my father rolled through my mind.

  “Did someone say fornication?” As if this situation wasn’t already bad enough, Liam just had to choose that moment to walk in. “Are we talking sex?”

  My family was fucking insane. That was the only possible explanation.

  “I was just telling Luke that I understand that he and Madelyn need their private time. But there’s no reason for him to move out. We can just move his bedroom into the den,” she said to Liam as she peered over my shoulder at him. I could not turn around and face my brother. Not now. I swear I’d woken up in the Twilight Zone and that at any moment, someone was going to grow tentacles and start spewing green slime or some shit. This couldn’t be my life.

  “I gotta side with Luke on this one, Ma,” Liam said, and I stepped sideways and turned so I could see both of them. “The last thing a guy wants to do is bring a hot girl back to his parents’ place. Sometimes things get interesting and you don’t always make it to the bedroom.”

  With a groan, I looked at my mother and her eyes grew wide. Liam was a clown. He said and did shit without a second thought, and he wasn’t fazed in the slightest about saying something like this to Ma.

  “Things get knocked off tables and pictures off walls,” he went on. “And let’s not forget when things go down in the kitchen. The kitchen table starts screeching against—”

  “Don’t you or Sierra ever ask me to eat on your kitchen table again.” My mother stormed past us and into the kitchen. “That’s where you eat, Liam!”

  I chuckled and Liam grinned. “Oh Sierra and I were eating all right,” he said with a gleam in his eyes. “It just didn’t involve any actual food.”

  I shook my head as he followed Ma, doing his best to calm her as she yelled that “romping” belonged in the bedroom and only the bedroom. She had more than once been subjected to Liam’s unnecessary stories, so something like this wasn’t even a surprise at this point.

  Chapter 24

  MADELYN

  I leaned over my desk and picked up my bag. I was more than ready to leave class now, because all I could focus on was everything I still had to do today. I was only a few months away from graduating, but after that, I still had to complete another three years in a DPT program before I could work as a physical therapist. It was grueling work, and sometimes I wondered why I chose this field, but the end result would be worth it.

  But I couldn’t keep up this kind of schedule for the next three years. Something had to go, and it was going to be my job at the diner. I’d always love helping my daddy at the farm, but I could definitely let go of the smell of greasy food.

  “Enjoy the rest of your day, class,” Professor Sims said as she dismissed us.

  One by one, we shuffled through the door and down the hall toward the entrance of the building. I paused at the bottom of the steps to get my keys from my bag and stepped to the side so I didn’t get trampled.

  “Hey, pretty girl.”

  I jumped in surprised and dropped my keys as a deep voice spoke next to my ear.

  When I turned around, Lucas chuckled and held up his good hand. “I didn’t mean to scare ya.”

  “Well you did, you fool,” I told him as I bent over to retrieve my keys. “What are you doing in Gainesville, anyway?” North Central Texas College was about thirty-five minutes from Alvord, and as far as I knew, Lucas didn’t have any business to handle here in town.

  “I came to see my girl,” he said, approaching me once again. He combed his fingers through my hair and rested his hand on the back of my neck. “It’s been too long.”

  “It’s been three days,” I corrected him.

  “Yeah”—he leaned in and kissed me—”too long,” he whispered against my lips.

  “Been busy,” I said and he gave me a puzzled look. “Work, school, and helping Dad leaves little time for much else. I gotta sleep too, ya know.”

  “You could sleep at my place with me,” he said, still holding my neck securely as he pressed his body to mine.

  “You mean your parents’ place?” I challenged him.

  “You aren’t the only one who’s been busy over the last few days.” He stepped back, dropped his hand from my neck, and walked toward the parking lot.

  “Oh really,” I hollered out, wondering what that was supposed to mean as he kept walking. I thought about letting him leave, but my curiosity got the best of me and I jogged after him. “What have you been up to? And don’t tell me ‘nothing’ or ‘you’ll see.’ You can’t just toss something like that out there and expect a girl’s mind not to come up with a hundred different possibilities.”

  He continued to walk, looking straight ahead and completely ignoring my question.

  “Lucas.” I pushed against his side and attempted to dodge his arm as he reached out for me. Only I wasn’t fast enough. He hooked it around my shoulders, pulled me in close to his side, and kissed the top of my head. Involuntarily my eyes fluttered shut for a moment. I loved when he did things like kissing my forehead or my temple, or skimming his fingers over my jaw. They were all gentle, sweet gestures I never thought I’d get the chance to experience. Every time he offered one now, another part of my heart became his.

  I won’t lie; that was a terrifying thought. I already knew that if he and I didn’t work out for some reason, I’d be crushed. That fear was the only thing that still made me a little hesitant regarding our relationship. If I gave in completely to my yearning for him and then he walked away, I’d fall apart, and I couldn’t do that. I wouldn’t.

  So this playful whatever it was we had going on would just have to do.

  “I may have found my own place.”

  Luke’s statement pulled me out of my thoughts. “Your own place, huh?”

  “Liam knew a guy that had an apartment for rent,” he continued. “It’s pretty small. Not as small as your elf hut, but small.” I poked at his side and he chuckled. “It’s just at
the edge of town, and I can start moving my things in whenever I want. Liam and Dad already took over the first load, and I was hoping that maybe I could get my girl to help me decorate.”

  As we stopped at my truck, I noticed the big red, shiny truck parked next to it. It had big meaty tires and was lifted maybe an inch or two higher than my own. Only mine was a 1500 and this was a half-ton.

  I wondered about it for a moment and then everything clicked. “You just had to go bigger, didn’t you?” I didn’t have to look at Luke to know he was smiling. “Couldn’t take it that I drove the biggest truck in town. It was a hit to your ego, wasn’t it?”

  “My girl can’t have a bigger truck than me. Shit ain’t right.”

  “Never took you for the kinda guy that felt he had to compensate for those areas he lacked in.”

  I knew the comment would surely gain a reaction. I just didn’t expect Lucas to pin me to the front end of my truck and hold me captive while pressing firmly against me.

  “Darlin’, I think we both know already that in no way am I lacking,” he said, his voice taking on that deep huskiness I loved. “But if you need me to remind you, I can do that too.”

  Why was it so hard for me to hold myself together when he was like this? That confidence I’d worked so hard to find always flew right out the window. A flash of that gorgeous smile mixed with a few seductive words, and I was a horny, melting mess ready to jump up in the cab of my truck and let him have his way with me.

  “I have to go help my dad, and then I work tonight until six at the diner.” My words came out as a panting whisper.

  “Then after,” he said before he pressed a kiss along my jaw, making me lose it even more. “We can have dinner and you can just stay over.”

  “Luke, I—”

  His lips covered mine and my sentence was lost.

  “I haven’t been able to hold you in three days, and it’s been even longer since I felt your bare body pressed to mine.” He sounded almost desperate. “I just want a night with you without interruption.”

  “Okay,” I gave in.

  Luke gave me one more quick kiss before stepping back and leaving me sagging against my truck. “I’ll see ya before seven.” He offered me a wink and moved around the front of his own monstrous truck before climbing up inside. As I watched him back away and drive off, a feeling that had been nagging at me for days returned.

  It had been there since the night I stayed at Luke’s parents’ house and his mother came into the room. Things were going so well that I couldn’t help but think something was waiting to flip my happiness upside down. I’d tried to tuck the thought away and pretend I was overreacting, but it lingered in the back of my mind every day, making me sick with fear.

  ***

  Sylvia made her fried chicken tonight, so the dinner rush was crazy. I swear that shit is like crack. People didn’t mind waiting thirty minutes or longer for a table as long as they got a plate full of chicken and a pile of potatoes smothered in gravy on the side.

  My feet ached, I smelled of grease, and I honestly wanted nothing more than to go home, climb into bed, and stay there for a week. But Luke had messaged me about an hour ago with the address to his place, followed by a long list of the things he wanted to do once I got there. Not all of them involved us being naked, but a majority of them did. I guess I was feeling a bit needy because having him fawn over me and hold me close sounded like heaven, even after the day I’d had.

  As I pulled into the driveway and parked just behind his beast of a truck, I couldn’t help but smile and roll my eyes. I shouldn’t be surprised that he just had to go bigger, or that he’d finally bought one. After his truck was totaled in the accident, he’d talked a lot about getting a new one, and he’d been talking about different vehicles and the pros and cons of each all week, so I knew something was up. He always wore this crazy little smirk whenever he pretended he couldn’t decide what to get to replace his truck.

  Thank goodness the driver of the other vehicle walked away untouched, but the fact he was driving a large concrete mixing truck helped with that. He just happened to be a guy who also worked with Jeb and his father, which from a legal standpoint was a good thing for Luke. Though he was ticketed for running a stop sign, the police didn’t ticket him for using his phone while driving because there was no indication he actually was. But they definitely suspected it.

  I grabbed my bag out of the passenger seat and slid out of the cab. As I walked up the drive, I looked at the L-shaped building where he now lived. It wrapped around onto the other street and had at least four other units attached. Luke’s was on the far left and was the only apartment that was technically on Briar Street. It looked small, judging by what I could see from the outside, and I think every light inside was on. As I approached the front door, I heard Luke’s voice coming through the open window. For a moment, I thought he had company and scanned the street, looking for a car I’d recognize, but the only vehicles in sight were his and mine.

  Leaning in a little closer, I listened to his conversation.

  “Yeah, that sounds amazing,” he said, his voice filled with excitement. “Damn, I miss the game. So fucking bad.”

  My stomach tensed at the longing in his voice. He was clearly talking to one of his college friends.

  “Trev, nothing compares to that rush,” he said, his voice rising even more. “The roar of the crowd, the announcer rattling off highlights of the game. The way your heart races with each yard you gain.”

  My heart ached as he spoke. Of course I felt horrible that his dream had been ripped from him. Luke was the guy everyone in town believed would go all the way to the pros one day. One hit took that dream away. That uneasy nagging settled deep in my stomach again as I wondered if he’d ever truly be happy here.

  “I’d appreciate that, man,” he added, and I leaned back from the window when I realized just how close his voice sounded. “Yeah, stay in touch, all right?”

  I stepped up to the door and knocked quickly, hoping he hadn’t realized I was out here eavesdropping.

  “All right, I gotta go,” he added right before the door swung open. The phone was still pressed to his ear as he held the door open, allowing me to enter. I tried my best to ignore what I’d just heard and instead focus on the apartment. It was bigger than my loft and had actual rooms instead of one big open space. The living room and kitchen were separated by an island with two barstools on one side. It must serve as his eating area since there was no room for an actual table.

  “Yeah, we’ll talk soon.” I jumped at the sound of Luke’s voice, realizing just how tightly wound I was. “I’ll try, man, but I can’t guarantee it.”

  I placed my bag on the couch and slipped my shoes off before moving farther into the apartment. A hallway led to what I assumed was the bedroom and a small bathroom was at the end of it.

  Lucas stepped up behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders and chest, pulling me back against him. “It’s small, but it’s mine,” he said. Maybe it was my imagination, because I was lost in my worries, but his statement lacked enthusiasm. But instead of questioning him, I tucked away my insecurities and decided not to mention it.

  “It’s bigger than mine,” I said as I rested my hands on his forearm as he continued to hold me firmly against his chest.

  “Of course. Not many places in town are that tiny,” he teased, and my smile grew wider.

  “So, uh,” I said, hesitating because I’d just promised myself to let it go. “Old friend on the phone calling to reminisce?”

  Luke let go and stepped around me. He walked to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of beer out of the fridge. As he opened it, I wondered if him drinking while on his pain meds was a good idea.

  “Trevor Lipton,” he finally said before taking a sip. “We played ball together at UA.” He looked up and our stares connected. “He got picked up by the Arizona Cardinals and wanted to invite me to a game.” I couldn’t miss the anguish in his words, and that ache in my ch
est returned with a vengeance. “A few of the guys are flying in to watch him play next week, and he has an extra ticket for me to join them.”

  “You should go,” I insisted, forcing a smile. “It’d be good for you to catch up with your friends.” He looked over at me and I did my best to hide my feelings. Part of me hoped he’d say that he’d rather stay here with me. But the more logical part knew that football was and would always be a huge part of who Lucas was. I couldn’t expect to compete.

  “Why are you trying to get rid of me?” he asked. For a second I thought he was teasing me, but his eyes lacked humor.

  “I’m not trying to get rid of you,” I insisted. “I just thought this might be good for you. You can’t work, you’re laid up in bed most of the time and bored the rest. Taking a trip like that might clear the fog.”

  He arched his brow at me.

  “Go, don’t go, it’s up to you.”

  I should have just kept my mouth shut. The happy guy from earlier today, the one who’d showed up at my school just to insist I spend the evening with him, was gone. In his place was this cranky, easily offended man who was looking at me as if I’d said the worst possible thing.

  “Maybe I should, since I apparently have some fog to clear.” He lifted his bottle to his lips and I bit back the words I wanted to throw at him. Poking the irritable bear would only make things worse.

  The uncomfortable feeling grew inside me as I tried to ignore his broody behavior. Over the next hour we talked very little. Instead we emptied boxes and put their contents away. When he hollered out that the pizza was here, I tried not to get angry that he didn’t even offer me a choice on what we’d eat. Had I known tonight would have been like this, I would’ve stayed home.

  We spoke less than ten words as we ate, and with the way my stomach rolled and flipped, I wasn’t sure how I managed to consume anything. I wanted to ask him where his mood came from, but I thought I’d better let it ride. It didn’t stop me from worrying, though.

  Chapter 25

  LUCAS