The Grace In Darkness

by Melissa Andrea

  “Do you think your self can behave long enough to walk me to my room? I’m supposed to meet Makayla for lunch.”

  “That doesn’t sound like an invite.”

  “That’s because it wasn’t.”

  He laughed and we headed off in the direction of my room. It wasn’t far and it’s not like I couldn’t find my way without Pierce. He was a distraction from everything that was running through my head, and I welcomed it.

  When we reached my room, I’d forgotten about most of my conversation with Dr. Rise, except for one part.

  “Thank you for walking me,” I said, standing in front of my door.

  “I should be thanking you.”

  “Why?”

  “Listen,” he said without answering my question. He tapped twice on the wall. “Maybe after the recital, when we’re not killing ourselves over rehearsals, the three of us can get dinner?” It was his way of saying it would just be as friends.

  I thought about that one part of my conversation with Dr. Rise before I answered. If I thought I felt the butterflies before, they were full force now.

  “Or maybe the two of us can.”

  I knew I’d caught him off guard, and I smiled. I didn’t know if I was ready or could even handle this, but there was only one way to find out.

  “Did you see Pierce today? Oh. My. Word!” Makayla growled.

  “You remember this is a school for the blind, right?”

  Was everyone on a Pierce kick today? I wasn’t ready to tell Makayla anything that had happened with him yet. It would be the only thing we talked about for weeks to come.

  “Oh, blindness shmindness, Araya. Stare at Pierce Logan long enough and you will see again. He’s that gorgeous.”

  “You think every guy is that gorgeous.” I mocked her.

  “But I only drop panties for guys like Peirce.”

  “Don’t be slutty. Don’t be that girl.”

  She laughed and smacked her lips at me. “Too late!”

  “I refuse to believe that.”

  I rested my hands back on the bed, waiting for Makayla to finish getting ready so we could go eat.

  “You just refuse to notice anyone!” She complained. Her voice was muffled as she searched through her closet.

  I shifted to resting on one hand and waved my other hand back and forth across my face. “Again, I don’t think you’re grasping the whole blind-girl thing here.”

  I was hit in the face with a piece of clothing.

  “Yeah, that’s never going to get old.”

  Sarcasm had become a forte of mine within the past six months. I blamed Mak’s bad influence.

  Snatching the fabric off my face, I tossed it aside. “Doesn’t it go against some ethical code of yours to throw things at the seeing impaired?”

  “Hmm…” She pretended to think. “No. Besides, I think only doctors and lawyers have ethical codes.”

  “Only doctors and lawyers? That’s kind of sad.”

  “Yeah, well, humanity today is sad and a thing of the past. It’s the world we live in.”

  “Lawyers, though?” I questioned doubtfully.

  “Hey! Not all lawyers are bad!

  “Isn’t being slimy a requirement to become a lawyer?”

  “You bite your tongue, Araya Lynn Noelle. My uncle is a damn good lawyer.”

  “Did you just middle-name me? How do you even know my middle name? And is your uncle slimy?”

  “The slimiest, but that doesn’t distract from the fact that he’s still a damn good lawyer. And because you can’t see me, being blind and all, I’m winking at you.”

  I snorted. “Here I thought you didn’t listen to me.”

  “You know I have access to your file. I know all your dark little secrets. You’d be surprised about the things I know about you.”

  I crossed my arms and my eyes lifted in doubt. “Like what?” I challenged.

  She smashed my face between her hands. “I’m looking at you intensely right now.” I rolled my eyes. “I know you have a tramp stamp that says ‘Dirty Girl’ and, be still my beating heart, that’s when I knew you needed me as your best friend.”

  I broke into a fit of uncontrollable laughter, and she kissed my forehead with a loud smack.

  “Now get that dirty-girl ass up and let’s go eat. I’m famished.”

  “Yeah, well, you keep letting that imagination of yours run wild and unsupervised, you pay the price.”

  I walked to the door and took my scarf and jacket from the coat hanger.

  “Hey, nobody puts Baby in the corner. Besides, what do I always say?”

  “Limitations are life’s way of calling you its bitch,” we said in unison.

  “You do me proud, dirty girl,” she mimicked in a soft, sultry voice.

  I groaned and wrapped the scarf around my neck. “Please tell me you’re not really going to call me that.”

  “You wear that tramp stamp proudly,” she said sternly.

  “You realize I don’t really have a tramp stamp, right?”

  “Why do you always have to spoil my fun?” She pouted.

  “Because sometimes I don’t think you remember what you invent and what’s real.”

  “Does that scare you?”

  “Actually, yes. Yes, it does.”

  She grabbed my shoulders, pushing me out the door, and slapped my butt.

  “Good! Oh, by the way…” she said and then nudged me and placed something in my hands. “This came for you.” When I frowned, she said, “Go ahead, you can read it.”

  I frowned and opened the folded notecard and my fingers moved slowly over the raised words. It took me a few minutes to finally figure out what it said.

  “Araya?” Makayla said, all teasing gone from her voice. She touched my arm. “You’ve gone completely, pale. What’s wrong? What did the note say?”

  I shook my head and shoved it into my pocket. “Nothing. I don’t know what it said.” I pushed her through the door, hoping her resistance would only be minimal.

  As we walked toward the lunch hall, I tried to push the words I always get what I want out of my head.

  “So what else does my file say? Anything interesting?”

  I pulled out one of the wooden chairs at the round table Mak and I usually ate at and sat down.

  “As badly as I wanted there to be something scandalous in that file of yours, I was sadly disappointed.”

  I threw a fry at her. “If that’s what you were looking for, you didn’t have to go searching through my file for it. According to Violet, the halls know it all.”

  “Blah! I don’t listen to hallway gossip. You know that.”

  “Were you planning on telling me what was being said?”

  “Nope and I still don’t plan to.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because there was nothing worth repeating. Except your tattoo. That I did tell to a couple of people.”

  I laughed. “Thank you. You’re a good friend.”

  “That doesn’t count when I’m your only friend.”

  Makayla wasn’t one for mushy moments so I didn’t think anything about her comment. Makayla was unlike anyone I’d ever known before. She was sassy and funny and smart. She spoke her mind, never biting her tongue for anyone, and it was one of the biggest things I admired her for.

  She was so confident in everything she did without being in your face about it. She could have any guy she wanted and she knew it, but she didn’t want just anyone. She wanted the one, so until he came along, she had fun flirting and dating.

  She was assigned to me the first week I was here to show me around the campus and help me find my classes. We were only given one week. After that, we had to figure everything out on our own. There were braille signs posted outside each classroom and service polls lined around every wall so we didn’t get hurt. It made it easier to move around on your own.

  However, when our week was up, I seemed to be stuck with Makayla, and that was just fine with me. She said she didn’t k
now what it was about me, but I wasn’t like the rest of the yuppie rich kids around here. I didn’t tell her at the time it was because I wasn’t, and now I didn’t need to.

  “So if I could read your file, what would it tell me?”

  I realized that I didn’t know much about Makayla’s background. She never talked about her family or if she had a big one. I didn’t even know how she ended up at Madison Academy. She was my age, so she was also considered a student here too.

  “If I told you, I’d have to kill you, and I don’t want to go through that again.”

  “Is it bad that you don’t even say things that scare me anymore?”

  “Hey, Mak. Araya.”

  There was his warm voice again, and it seemed low and intimate when he said my name. I blushed and stared down into my plate, feeling Mak’s eyes on me. I wanted to dissolve into the floor right about then.

  “Got you something, Araya,” Pierce said, placing something on my tray. I could smell the gooey sweetness and almost licked my lips. Then I frowned.

  “How did you get this? There was no more up there when Mak and I went through the line.”

  “I have my ways. Plus, I know it’s your favorite. Enjoy.”

  He walked away before I could say anything and I knew I had a lot of explaining to do. My chair was yanked roughly in Mak’s direction, and I nearly fell out of it.

  “A little warning for the blind girl next time, please.”

  “Quit it and spill it, Araya Noelle!” I groaned. “Stop stalling. What. The. Hell. Was. That? Pierce Montgomery was just flirting with you!”

  “He wasn’t flirting. You know Pierce. He’s always nice.”

  “Oh my God! Something happened between the two of you! I can see it all over your face. Did he kiss you?”

  “Shh!” I hissed. “No, he didn’t kiss me!”

  “What happened? Why are you torturing your best friend? I can’t believe I wasn’t the first to know-” She stopped suddenly, and it gave me a chance to slow my dizziness. “You told her, didn’t you?”

  “Who?”

  “You know who! The wench!” I could hear the narrowing in her voice.

  The wench she referred to was Dr. Rise. Makayla didn’t know why, but she swore Dr. Rise wasn’t a nice person. Actually, she put it a lot differently than that. It was a feeling she had and she said she could always trust her gut.

  “No, I didn’t tell Dr. Rise. There’s nothing to tell.”

  “Yes, there is. If you don’t tell me, I’ll ask him myself.”

  Her hands moved to the edge of the table and I heard her chair skid against the floor. Makayla wasn’t one to bluff. I grabbed at her wrist.

  “Okay! It was the other night after rehearsal. He walked me outside and he asked me out.”

  “Are you serious right now?”

  “What?”

  “You can go on and on in full-blown details on how dancing makes you feel, but this you’re vague on?”

  “I don’t know what you want me to say! That’s all that happened.”

  “What did he say? What did you say? I’m dying here!”

  “Okay, but you have to swear you won’t freak out. AND...” I said, raising my voice as I heard her start to protest, “and you won’t interrupt me until I’m finished.”

  “Fine,” she grumbled and her head dropped against the desk in a full-on pout.

  I could feel my face heating up. “He said... he said he wanted to take me out even if that meant having you there too. I told him I wasn’t ready to date yet.” She let out a loud dramatic whimper but didn’t add to it. “He made me promise when I was ready, he would be the first to know, and then he walked me back to our room.”

  She waited a few seconds before she mumbled into the table. “Are you finished? Can I talk now?”

  “If you must.”

  “Are you crazy?” she asked, popping up from the table. “Pierce is a great guy! What’s stopping you? Ryland?”

  “No. Yes. I love him, Mak. I only left him because I didn’t want to ruin his life. I would have if I stayed. I just wish I knew if he still feels the same way about me.”

  “Would it change anything if he did? Would you leave Madison to be with him?”

  “I... I don’t know.”

  “If I tell you something, do you promise not to get mad at me?”

  My curiosity was piqued. “Okay, I promise. What?”

  “He was here… Ryland.”

  I frowned. “What do you mean he was here? When? How?”

  “It was a few months after you started. He was in the hall, looking for you. I found him. Mind you, I didn’t know who he was at the time, but I brought him to you. You were dancing and he looked... he looked like a guy still in love with you.”

  I was shocked. Stunned. I didn’t know what to say as my mind spun. Ryland had been here? Looking for me? Why hadn’t he said anything? Why hadn’t he tried to talk to me? If he was still in love with me like Makayla said, why had he left me here?

  “I didn’t know... I wish I had known.”

  “I’m just saying maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to assume it’s over between the two of you.”

  “But he didn’t try to talk to me... Why?”

  “Maybe you should ask him.”

  She was right. Maybe I should.

  “Have we talked about the possibility of regaining your sight, Araya?” Dr. Peterson asked, shining his little flashlight from one eye to the other. I pulled back. His sudden question held my complete attention.

  “What?”

  The light was gone with a click and his clothes rustled as he walked away from me. My air went with him. I waited for him to respond, but he was busy flipping through papers. I wanted to scream at him, but I didn’t want to give him a heart attack before he had a chance to tell me.

  “It says here in your chart that your last physician talked to you and your aunt about the full extent of your condition, but I don’t think we’ve discussed it yet.

  Nina. Somehow I managed to be surprised. What else had she kept from me?

  “No, we haven’t. Is that a possibility? Regaining my sight?

  “I can’t guarantee you’ll ever regain your sight one hundred percent, but the tests we ran on you your first week here show some slight improvement since the accident. It is a possibility your vision could become a little clearer. You may even start to see some color. I don’t want you to get your hopes up, though.” He was quick to cover his tracks. “The progress was minimal and probably not even noticeable to you.”

  I swallowed hard. “The accident... was so long ago. I was so overwhelmed by everything that happened. Could you remind me of what my condition is exactly?”

  “Of course.” He cleared his throat. “In your case, where the infection obstructed your eyes, they weren’t able to do anything on their end. However, eyes are very resilient, and they had high hopes that yours would repair themselves in the long run. It looks like they might have been right. But like I said, there is no way to know how much repair your eyes will achieve.”

  “So there is a possibility I could see again?”

  “I don’t want you to get your hopes up, Araya.”

  “But that’s what you’re telling me, right?”

  “Yes. That’s what I am telling you.”

  “Jack and Coke,” I told the bartender, leaning against the counter and waiting.

  “Right away, Mr. Dare,” he said and started fixing my drink.

  I frowned and he laughed. “Don’t look so surprised. We’re required to know the big guys’ names,” he said, finishing off my drink and passing it to me.

  I nodded and brought it to my lips. “I’m not one of the big guys.”

  “If you say so, Mr. Dare. Enjoy.”

  He was already helping the person next to me and I picked up my drink, moving farther into the banquet room. I hadn’t been here five minutes and I was already bored out of my damn mind. I took another drink and thanked God there was alcohol here.
If that bartender thought he knew me now, we’d be real close by the end of the night.

  I found an empty table and placed my drink on it. I stretched my neck, using my fingers to loosen my collar. I couldn’t remember the last time I had to wear a tuxedo, but this one felt like a damn noose around my neck.

  I surveyed the room. It looked like Christmas had thrown up. Red and green everything smothered the decor. Christmas trees were expensively decorated in every corner with one huge one as the main focus. Enough twinkling lights to give someone a seizure were strung up all around.

  Everyone here was one of J.D.’s stuffy, boring business acquaintances. I had no interest in spending the rest of my night with these people, and I planned on ducking out as soon as I could.

  “You sure are looking sexy in that tux, Ryland Dare,” a cool voice purred behind me.

  Fuck me.

  I turned to find Roxy McCain behind me. I hadn’t seen her since Coraline threw that ridiculous party to pimp me out. It was also the first time I’d asked Araya out. I hadn’t cared to see Roxy again and nothing had changed since then.

  “You bad boy, you never called me.” She pouted, walking past me while brushing up against me at the same time.

  “I didn’t have your number.” I took another drink, paying zero attention to her.

  “You could have gotten it from your mother.”

  “Well, now that would have been putting in more effort than I was willing to.”

  “That’s not very nice, Ryland.” I felt her finger trailing down the front of my chest.

  I looked down at her hot-pink fingernail and then at her.

  “I’m not very nice.”

  “I like that you’re not nice. It’s no fun when it’s easy.”

  I took another drink and averted my attention. She wasn’t getting the hint. The ice clattered together as I finished off the drink. Apparently I was going to be visiting the bar again real soon.

  “Your drink is empty,” she said, glancing down at my glass.

  She took a step closer, trapping her hand between our bodies. It didn’t deter her movements like I thought it was going to. It just shielded them from prying eyes. I made a startled sound and my body jerked in surprise as her hand brushed against the front of my pants once and then twice. She mistook my reaction for one of interest and she pushed herself closer against me.