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Kitty Time Travel

Page 16

by Horia Hulea


  Chapter 16

  "Who's right now, Mom? Who's right now?" Arthur the Chosen One is talking to himself while rummaging around the alchemist table—a table that has in the center the baffled kitty all tied up in a very undignified posture.

  One by one, all kinds of strange and ancient alchemist devices start to line up around him, each creepier then the last, making him question their source or their purpose.

  "Where did I put it? WHERE? Where is the stupid shit when you need it?"

  The ensuing hysterical laugh makes the kitty's hair stand up.

  Arthur the Master of the Occult has found it! The water sprinkler for diluting the alchemist solutions!

  "Go get a job, this! Go get a life, that! 'Why can't you do something with your future?' I'll show you what I can do with my future! Everyone thinks I'm a loser! They will see who the loser is when I will fly on thundering clouds and I will walk on water! Who will be the loser then, huh?!"

  With one grip on the cat and the other on the sinister device, Arthur the Grand Mystic rages.

  "Talk! Talk, you stupid cat! TALK! The codex says you can talk! Why don't you talk? I need the prophecies for the next years! I need the powers of creation! All, all, I need it ALL!"

  But the kitty doesn't seem to be doing anything of what a Holy Spirit Cat usually does.

  And for one moment, just a tiny-winy moment, Arthur thinks that this is ridiculous and he is going crazy.

  But just for one moment!

  Because the next moment, the hysterical laugh bursts forth in a flood.

  "Oh, I know what I will do! I will sublime you in the oven together with the aqua regia, and I will have your essence! Then I will drink it, and I will be the Holy Spirit myself!"

  As he resumes his hysterical laugh that constantly cuts in between his sentences, a strange thing happens out of nowhere: a shuffle of tiny little feet whooshes across the room, followed by a

  Waash! and a Bang! and a Crack!

  And what do you know?

  The last thing Arthur the Fallen remembers is falling down like a log with a big, cheese-smelling rat on top of him.

  Then blackout follows.

 

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