Raw

by Simone Sowood

  The remote is on the coffee table and I’m tempted to turn it on and see what is happening, but I restrain myself. Mostly because it would mean leaning forward, away from Xander.

  A cell phone ring echoes down the hallway. It’s my phone and I move to get it but Xander grips my shoulders, preventing me from getting up.

  “Ignore it,” he says.

  “It might be my mother.”

  “Do you really want to talk to your mother right now and tell her what you’re doing?”

  “No,” I say. In fact, I don’t want to have to explain any of this to my mother ever. Maybe if some time passes she’ll forget the whole thing ever happened. She’s pretty old fashioned and I can’t imagine what she thinks of me now.

  Cradling my wine glass, I nuzzle my head into his neck and try not to think about that conversation.

  “What will you do after you leave the show?” I ask, my voice soft.

  “Who knows? I never really wanted to be on it in the first place, so I guess I’ll just go back to doing what I was doing before.”

  “What was that?”

  “Whatever I felt like doing when I got up that morning.”

  “Yeah, that sounds real normal,” I say, laughing.

  “What would you do if you can do anything you wanted?” he asks.

  “Easy, I’d open my own hotel.”

  “Has that always been a dream of yours?”

  “Absolutely. And it wouldn’t be a highway pit-stop type place. In my dreams it’s a luxury resort that people come from all over the world to stay in.” I’ve had it all planned out in my head for years as a fantasy that I get lost in when I need to escape reality.

  “Sounds like my kind of place. Where is it?”

  “In my mind, mostly. But I guess on the coast somewhere that’s isolated from the rest of the world. I want it to be somewhere people go to escape from their lives.” I have no delusions of it ever coming true. My reality dream is to become a manager at the Good Rest Inn.

  “Kind of like what we’re doing now.”

  “Exactly. Maybe I can make it a refuge from the media destination spot.”

  “Sounds like a good idea, I’d back it,” Xander says and squeezes my shoulder to emphasize his words.

  “But you don’t have any dreams? Nothing you’ve always wanted to do?”

  “I’ve already told you mine, to be away from the posers.” His voice drops, as if he is contemplating how to make it a reality.

  “Sounds like it will be hard, considering your parents and Luna.” I say, my voice is quiet but I’m no longer nervous about saying anything around him.

  “Considering they are the worst of the worst, yes. What do I do? Cut them from my life?”

  “You don’t have to cut them, you just don’t have to see them much. Can you handle Christmas and birthdays?”

  “I don’t know if I can do that to Luna.” He tips his head back and looks up at the ceiling.

  “Do I get to hear the Luna story now?” Why did he pose as her boyfriend and why did she turn on him with the kinky sex scandal? I can’t help him if I don’t know the reasons behind it.

  Xander exhales sharply and starts to talk. “I think it was a lot easier for me growing up, because I was a boy. In the world of my two sets of parents, boys are the ones who do stuff and become things. The women were just there to look good and get fucked. So, for Luna, she got really messed up about her body image.”

  “I can see that happening.”

  “Everything changed for her when she got her show. I was so happy to see her finally focusing on doing something positive but then…” Xander’s voice trails off and I’m filled with a mix of frustration and sympathy. I rest my hand on his abs and sink into him a little deeper.

  Chapter 22

  Xander

  It’s difficult to explain things to Elsie when I don’t fully understand them myself. It’s amazing that I’m even talking about any of this, but Elsie brings it out of me and I feel lighter for it. Like the tension I always carry around in my muscles is easing.

  “Are you going to finish that sentence?” Elsie asks, her finger tracing patterns on my stomach.

  But how do I explain the rest of it? I always hated the way Luna was treated when we were growing up. The little comments from my father about the way she was developing got to me the most. It was clear they expected her to follow the footsteps of our mothers.

  My fathers were the ones believing the men made the money and the women were expected to be their powerless playthings. But Luna is an only child whose inheritance is almost as big as mine. She has no need to be anyone’s plaything. Men should be hers. Somehow that doesn’t compute in their brains.

  As a boy, I got questions like when do I want to start learning the business. Never was my answer then and never is my answer now.

  I have no interest in participating in my family business because that would mean dealing with my father all the fucking time, and if I had to do that I’d end up beating in his head.

  By the time we were in our early twenties, Luna was pretty messed up. I was still young and stupid and hadn’t figured out all the ways our parents contributed to her problems, or mine.

  But I did know that it was very wrong when my father started bringing his friend around for obvious reasons. I wasn’t about to let that happen.

  I did whatever it took to warn him off, even when it meant threatening him. All my nicer attempts failed. I had no choice but to get physical with him.

  “I’m trying to figure out how to explain it. Luna changed when she got her show, finally she had some self-worth and confidence and realized she was more than a sex toy. She even met a guy who seemed to treat her with respect. Until I went out drinking with him and learned that it was all an act to get on her show and that he was secretly already in a serious relationship.”

  “The poor thing,” Elsie says quietly.

  I sigh and say, “I may have broken his nose that night.” I half expect Elsie to recoil or cry out in horror, but she doesn’t react.

  “Sounds like you’re very protective of Luna.”

  I’m silent for a few breaths. I’ve never consciously thought about it before, but I suppose I am. “Someone has to be.”

  “She’s lucky to have you as her sort-of brother.”

  “Yeah, I never expected to be playing her boyfriend on her TV show but after I broke the guy’s nose, she freaked out, believing stuff like her show would be canceled. It was bad. She had already announced that her boyfriend would be introduced on the next episode.”

  Elsie chuckles and says, “And so you stepped in to be the boyfriend.”

  “It made her happy and I figured it would be fun.”

  “Fun until she decided to unleash accusations of your kinkiness to the world.”

  “You’re good at this,” I say and sit up straighter. I cup her cheek and tilt her head to mine. Her eyes trace over my face and I brush my lips against hers. A gentle shudder rolls down my back, urging me to deepen the kiss but I pull back and examine her face.

  No one has ever made me feel the way Elsie does. No one has ever listened to me before, let alone understood what I’m saying. With her I’m myself, with nothing held back. And there is no hint of her judging me. It’s just the two of us, connecting.

  “But why did she do it?” Elsie asks.

  I’ve already talked so much, I’m done. At least for now. It’s too draining.

  “Let’s do something,” I say, flashing her my broadest smile.

  “Like what?” Elsie asks with a coy glance.

  “I’ve been thinking about throwing you in the pool and seeing what you look like wet.”

  “That pool looks amazing, I would love to go swimming in it. Especially the waterfall.”

  “Good. You can find some towels, I have to get something from the suitcase,” I say, and pull her off the sofa.

  “You’d better not be checking your phone,” she says with a raised brow.

&nbs
p; I laugh and say, “Wouldn’t dream of it. There might be some towels in the downstairs powder room.”

  “I’ll go check,” she says and walks away, her ass swaying.

  I stride down the hall to the front door where I abandoned my suitcase. Opening the pouch on the front, I pull out a strip of condoms and head to the back of the house. I tear one condom off and toss the others on the kitchen counter before stripping off my boxers and leaving them on the kitchen floor.

  There’s a splash and I hurry out the back door, condom in hand. Elsie’s swimming around underwater and I’m once again struck by how she didn’t give any thought to getting her hair wet or messing up her makeup. She doesn’t think twice about showing me her real self.

  And her real self is amazing. She isn’t hung up on looks or lacking in confidence about who she is. She is simply Elsie. And I could get lost in her forever.

  The towels and thong lay by the edge of the pool and I drop the condom beside them and dive in. Elsie surfaces right as I reach her, and I’m torn between wrapping her around me or splashing her. I choose to splash her.

  “Hey,” Elsie shouts and splashes me back. It’s a simple game but not one I’ve played like this before.

  Her splashing is relentless, and I sink under the water with a new tactic. I grab her legs and pull her under before springing us both up and throwing her into the air. Laughing, she lands on the water and immediately starts kicking in order to splash me as much as she can.

  I use my forearm to shield my eyes and grab one of her feet. She sets the other on the bottom of the pool and hops around, trying to free her foot. Yanking her to me, I let go of her foot and scoop her up in my arms.

  Laughing, Elsie holds on to me. “What are you doing with me?”

  “You’ll see.” I move to the edge of the pool where the landscaped boulders form a waterfall. I dunk her head under it just to turn her into a live Sports Illustrated photo shoot.

  I set her feet down and position her under the waterfall. On instinct, she reaches her hands up to her head. Even though it’s warm, her nipples are hardened nubs.

  “That’s it, supermodel, work that waterfall,” I say with a smirk.

  “Is that what I’m doing?” she says and laughs. She throws her head back and runs her hands through her drenched hair. Looking at me with a coy smile, she flicks her hair, encircling herself with water droplets and cups her breasts. She holds her nipples between her fingers and plays with them, making me instantly hard.

  Chapter 23

  Elsie

  I can’t believe how much fun I’m having. It’s difficult to remember the last time I let loose like this. My entire body is humming and I feel like a sex goddess. At least that’s how Xander makes me feel, and the core of heat blazing between my legs proves it. He makes me want to do crazy things for him. Hell, right now I’d even wear that strappy outfit Isabel wore for her photos. For the first time in my life, Xander makes me want to be nasty.

  He makes me want to be everything.

  With him, all my fears and worries have vanished and I’m filled with nothing but amazement, for both him and the way he makes me feel.

  And I think I make him feel the same way. When he talks about his family, the tension in his jaw seems to get less and less with each passing moment.

  I can completely see why he didn’t ever talk about his childhood before. Who would he talk to? It sounds like Luna is still hung up on appearances and the fake life he hates so much and there doesn’t seem to be anybody else.

  Two days ago I would’ve assumed the world’s sexiest man had a perfect life and was happy but now I know better. Looks, money and fame don’t guarantee anything. Even if they do make life easier.

  Maybe a good childhood is the key, I don’t know. His parents were never able to teach him to appreciate anything. From what he says they only made him worry about what he didn’t have and not what he had.

  Not that any of it matters now, he sees all of this and if you can see it you can change it.

  I carry on my show for him in the waterfall, flicking my hair and running my hands over my body. Xander stands back, giving me room to move around. I do a twirl and when I face him again he plants his hands on my waist and pulls me tight against him.

  His erection digs into me and I instinctively reach down and wrap my fingers around it.

  Xander’s mouth drops and he says, “It’s like that, is it?”

  “Oh, it’s going to get better than this,” I say, close my eyes and propel myself down under the water, amazing myself at my actions.

  Opening my eyes, I grip his shaft. Heat traces over my skin as I admire his dick. It’s as beautiful as the rest of him. Closing off the back of my throat, I dart out my tongue and lick around the head. I wonder how long I can hold my breath.

  Cupping his balls, I slide my lips and tongue up and down his shaft. The taste of chlorine mixes with him, fueling an urgency and I work faster. Out of breath, I kick the bottom of the pool and resurface.

  Xander instantly grabs me and asks, “How long can you hold your breath?”

  “Let’s find out,” I say and inhale as deeply as I can then sink back beneath the surface.

  This time I don’t waste any air and grip his shaft as I take his tip into my mouth. I pulse my tongue against his dick and he seems to grow even bigger. Xander rests his hands on my shoulders, the contact sending shivers over my skin, all the way to my feet. My eyes roll back and I accidentally release my breath.

  Kicking my feet against the pool floor again, I resurface, gasping.

  “Are you okay?” Xander asks and pulls me into his arms.

  “I am fine, I just got carried away I think, maybe. I was enjoying that.”

  “I bet you weren’t enjoying it as much as I was.” He grinds himself against me and spins us around in the water.

  Instinctively, I wrap my legs around his waist and he grips my ass. Our lips meet in a wet, deep kiss and I pull against his strong shoulders to get as close to him as possible. Our bodies press tight against each other, squeezing out any drop of water between us.

  I’ve never felt like this before. The sex earlier was amazing, but this is different. I’ve seen the true Xander now and this time being in his arms is like there is no barrier left.

  It’s real.

  A soft moan escapes my throat at the realization of what is happening. Xander has made me lose my inhibitions and I’ve made him lose his pain. A tear trickles down my cheek, mixing with the pool water.

  Xander breaks the kiss and with a growl says, “You are the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen.”

  His words send an electric shock right between my legs and I try to press myself even closer against him, even though it’s impossible.

  He moves us to the edge of the pool near where I left the towels and pries me away from him. It’s almost physically painful to lose the skin-to-skin contact.

  “What did you go and do that for?” I ask. Xander smirks and scoops me into his arms.

  “So, I can do this.” He slides his hand up the inside of my thigh and pushes his finger straight into my aching pussy. My walls immediately tighten around it and I clutch on to him to allow myself to widen my legs, their weight buoyed by the water.

  Adding a second finger, he presses against my most sensitive spot, more gentle than he’s been before but just as intense. A whirling ball of tingles forms deep within me and spreads out through my chest and down my limbs. I throw my head back and simply enjoy the moment.

  “That’s it, baby, keep making those noises,” Xander says and I realize I’ve been moaning. “I want to make you feel so good that you can’t stop screaming.”

  He takes his fingers away and I sigh in protest. Silencing me with his lips, he gives me a quick kiss before spinning me around and pinning me against the edge of the pool, my back to him. My heart flutters at his action and I wait for his next move.

  “Don’t move,” he orders. So I don’t.

  A condom lays on the
towel, and I realize that he’s planned this, which makes my heart flutter faster and I try to calm my breath. Pushing himself up on the edge of the pool, he rolls the condom on in record speed then drops back into the water.

  He presses his body tight behind me and bites the delicate skin of my neck, and a massive tingle runs down my back. I can’t help but moan again.

  Shuffling us along the edge of the pool, we stop in front of one of the water jets. Xander lifts my legs and presses his cock into me, forcing me to gasp as I adjust to his sudden entrance. He reaches around and pulls back the lips around my clit and adjusts our position until the water from the jet is shooting straight onto my clit.

  “Holy shit,” I scream. Everything in the world vanishes except for my pussy. My clit feels like it’s the size of a boulder, and floods me with heat and tingles so intense that I cannot see. I cannot think. I cannot breathe.

  Xander drives his cock into me and I dissolve around it. Waves crash through me and I dissolve into a puddle against him. I’m half laying on the edge of the pool, my lungs heaving for air and tears streaming down my face.

  Chapter 24

  Xander

  The muscles in my back coil and I drive into Elsie again. My eyes trace down her wet hair, over her soft shoulders and down her back to her ass, distorted by the water. Memories of her laugh flashes through my mind, and I can’t stop myself from feeling something more for her. She listened to me, she understood and now she’s writhing against me.

  A vision of her in my arms overtakes everything and my body releases into her. I groan as the tension in my back springs free in the most earth-shattering orgasm I’ve ever experienced.

  I never thought I’d find anyone who had this effect on me, but I’m going to hold on to her no matter what.

  It doesn’t matter that we are from different cities or different worlds, I will make this work.

  Elsie collapses against the edge of the pool, her body as drained as my own. I reach up and run my fingers through her wet hair, smoothing it back from her face. My gaze runs over the fullness of her lips and the gentle curve of her nose to her beautiful green eyes.