Volume 9 - The Dissociation of Suzumiya Haruhi

by Tanigawa Nagaru

  “Although I still find it unbelievable……”

  My head feels like there are many caterpillars crawling on its surface. (TL: As in the tingly feeling.)

  “You are saying after Haruhi is feeling uncomfortable after seeing Sasaki, and hearing her call me a very close friend? But must she throw a tantrum? Is it her subconscious at work again?”

  “Sealed Realities and Avatars, they are phenomena which you should know about, but the current situation is different when compared to the past. While the Sealed Realities have not undergone any significant change, the movement of the Avatars is strangely quiet. They used to cause major destruction. But now, they stand around doing nothing. In fact, only once in a while are they reminded of their own duty and knock lightly on a few buildings around them.”

  The greenish-white monster is starting to gain sense, isn’t it a good thing?

  “To the ‘Organization’, it is the same. Because if we do not destroy these Avatars, the Sealed Reality would not disappear.”

  Koizumi continued his explanation…

  “From a conclusive point of view, the Avatars are currently in a state of daze, or Suzumiya-san is. It is as if she does not know what she is thinking, or even make sense of what she is thinking about. And so she could only drift along this dreary state of hers, thinking about her problems subconsciously.”

  I think Mr. Sigmund Freud should be laughing in the other world. I am sure he did not expect the results of his research to be used so commonly to analyze Haruhi.

  “From my viewpoint, if we attribute everything to Suzumiya-san’s jealousy of Sasaki-san, everything will be much easier to understand.”

  I am afraid I have to rebut this statement. I did not say the following for anyone else, but for the good of Haruhi……

  “She was the one who mentioned that love relationships are a kind of mental illness!”

  “Then I shall ask you, do you think Suzumiya-san’s psychological skills would be able to see through all the different kinds of love between males and females?”

  Definitely not.

  “I thought so too. Suzumiya-san thinks she understands it very well even though she doesn’t. Her maturity does not vary much compared to girls of the same age as her. From here, you can see that she is actually a very normal teenage girl, except that she just isn’t frank enough with herself.”

  I don’t think you are qualified enough to say that. From my perspective, you are someone who isn’t very frank as well.

  “Really?”

  Koizumi stopped his smile that resembled that of an ancient mask, while he stroked his cheeks as if acting.

  “It seems my skills are still not enough, you actually saw through it so easily.”

  He spread out his two hands and shook his head.

  “If we are to analyze this, then we can say that after Suzumiya-san found out that you have a friend that she doesn’t know of from the past, and had an emotion that could not be described. Although she might have considered that such an incident may take place, she hadn’t really seen it happening till now. Such an emotion cannot be described as just jealousy, but an emotion that is more primitive and natural. I will put it another way if you still cannot comprehend. You ought to have at least a few old friends. This, Suzumiya-san can understand. Even if there are any female friends, there is nothing to be surprised about. But having Sasaki-san proclaim herself that you are a very close friend of hers is something that is unexpected. Even though I already knew of her existence, it still comes as quite a surprise to me as well.”

  “I understa……. no, I totally do not understand.”

  “Because Suzumiya-san had always been in a state of loneliness throughout middle school, the phrase ‘close friend’ may have been quite a shock to her.”

  “Didn’t she want it that way herself? Where she would be ‘aloof from worldly affairs’?”

  “There should still be a bit of shock. For example, if I have a friend of the opposite gender whom you do not know of suddenly appearing in front of you, how would you feel?”

  “Do you really have one?”

  I lifted my body outwards while asking that. Even if this guy has a girlfriend behind my back, it wouldn’t be surprising at all.

  Koizumi gave a bitter smile.

  “This example is not very good. I should not use myself as an example. So if Asahina-san had a very close male friend in the past, and they are still rather close even till now?”

  Perhaps I would not feel too good. But……

  “This can’t be quite possible. Asahina-san and Nagato are not here to play or sightsee.”

  I think that it would be better if they were able to unwind a bit more and have fun instead. And Asahina-san’s past is actually the future that is very far from us isn’t it?

  “This is only an assumption. What if it is true, what would you think? There should be a strange feeling that could not be described isn’t there? It isn’t jealousy, nor is it confusion. First, Asahina-san did not pay any special attention to the guy, and on the surface, it is as if there are no special feelings between them. Even you yourself cannot figure out what is happening. Thus, questioning yourself about that aimlessly would be pretty stupid. And so attempting to forget such an incident is the best way to go about it. And now, you can try applying the example of Asahina-san and yourself to you and Suzumiya-san.”

  Cheers from a small group could be heard from the opposite of the quadrangle. It seems a first-year has decided to join a particular society.

  Koizumi turned his head in that direction.

  “However, one’s subconscious mind isn’t so easily fooled. That is why as the subconscious mind tries to vent its feelings, Sealed Realities and incomplete Avatars are formed. Although the reason for this seems very clear, in actual fact it is not. And that is why there is no good strategy to counter it. Actually it is not really true that there are none……”

  Koizumi squinted harder with each passing second.

  “Kyon! Koizumi!”

  Haruhi, along with Asahina-san, was walking towards us with steps that seemed as if she was trying to break the ground of the quadrangle, her hands placed over Asahina-san’s shoulders.

  “Kyaa~! Ow, ow ow…..”

  Because the difference in distance covered in each step was probably about five times more for one than the other, Asahina-san’s legs simply could not handle it at all. Haruhi simply ignored this point and dragged her along as if she were prey she just caught and walked towards us.

  I originally thought she would at least bring a first-year along, but she actually returned empty-handed. Even cheongsams and maid costumes are not enough to catch a single fish? Seems the first-years of this year have common sense.

  Haruhi stood in front of the LCD monitor screening the trailer, still refusing to let go of Asahina-san.

  “Is there anybody interested in joining coming by? What about Yuki? Is there anyone?”

  I think that Nagato’s head seems to be shaking slightly side to side.

  “We went to many places, but they all don’t make the grade. No way. There are some who, after hearing that they would be able to drink Mikuru-chan’s self-brewed tea if they joined the brigade, had their saliva dripping all over the ground. Those who nodded their heads to that would have failed the first part of my admission test. As for the girls, as soon as we got near them, they started running away. Seems there isn’t much luck this year.”

  I am afraid that we are giving others the false impression that we are a Cosplay Research Society……

  “But I still think that there would at least be one person who can pass the test. Everything had only just begun! Just begun! Kyon, are there any interesting juniors from your middle school? I definitely don’t think there will be any from mine, so all those who came from East Junior High should be ignored. I forgot to inform you all about this until just now.”

  While Haruhi is talking loudly just now, her face……

  Showed a beautifu
l smile that radiated the glow of a nuclear fusion of multiple stars. I don’t think there are any words other than glitzy that can describe it better.

  A very intriguing smile.

  On that day, we failed to achieve anything in the end, and so we could only return to the clubroom in a dark mood.

  Asahina-san heaved a huge sigh of relief that seemed to have emerged from the bottom of her heart, before carrying the teapot to the stove and started heating them. On the other hand, both Koizumi and I buried our heads in the messy wires coiling all over the table.

  Nagato rolled the stickers that are labeled Literature Club into a ball and threw them into the rubbish bin, much like how one does with a tissue one just cleared his or her nose with, delicately placed the club magazine sample back onto the bookshelf, as if holding onto a gem, before mechanically moving back to a corner of the clubroom and opening up a hardcover book. Although she sat pretty far away from us just now, I don’t think she wouldn’t have overheard my conversation with Koizumi. But the emotionless face and lips in power-saving mode of the alien humanoid interface that haven’t changed in the past year brought me unlimited serenity and calmness.

  Haruhi sat on the seat reserved for the brigade chief and shook the pyramid-shaped sign with her fingers at the top part of the figure.

  “There doesn’t seem to be anyone remotely interesting among the first-years. Looks like we have to widen the search area after all. Maybe the ones with potential had entered the sports clubs. People will never appear by themselves if we keep waiting. It is always better when the sea is larger and we cast the net more often.”

  Haruhi crossed her slim legs that are emerging from the cheongsam, revealing an expression of a person popular with children thinking of the next game to play with them. No matter how you look at it, it shows excitement.

  As for my own opinion, instead of mindlessly casting nets, why not find a specific place and fish there with a fishing rod instead? It might be easier to catch large and quality fish this way. But I have no plans to share my thoughts with her and thus automatically participate in her plan to tempt and abduct members.

  “I am not thinking about letting go of big fishes either. In fact, I am thinking of surveying clubrooms one by one and getting hold of them before they decide to join the other clubs.. We have so many students here, there must be at least one that fits our appetite.”

  Fits your appetite? So what flavor of first-year would you like? It would be best if they could be eaten right after being roasted?

  “For example, those that are cuter than Mikuru-chan, more obedient than Yuki, more courteous than Koizumi, all these kinds would do.”

  You sure is setting a high standard. Plus, the only realistic option that Haruhi gave of the three would be for Asahina-san only. Let’s not say that the actual reason for having Nagato is “Wearing spectacles is so unique” kind of crap. It is only because the clubroom Haruhi wanted to occupy belonged to Nagato’s Literature Club that Nagato was accepted as a member. As for Koizumi, it is only because he was a “mysterious transfer student” in Haruhi’s terms that allowed him to enter. Will she get the next person who transfers over in May as well?

  “The spot for mysterious transfer student is already filled by Koizumi and so it is enough. And he has been quite an excellent assistant brigade leader. There is no longer a need for a similar role anymore. It must be someone interesting. The SOS Brigade only recruits the very best after all.”

  After turning on the computer, Haruhi supported her head with one hand and clicked the mouse with the other.

  “I am so careless.”

  You being extremely careless didn’t exactly start now.

  “I should have surveyed the middle schools in this region and taken note of all those with potential. Otherwise, if those who could have been our club members entered other high schools, it would be too much of a waste. Why don’t we set up branches of the SOS Brigade in other schools as well? Or should we set up a preparatory SOS Brigade in nearby middle schools instead?”

  Haruhi’s fantasies seems to be reaching intoxicating levels. I inevitably let out a sigh.

  “What are we recruiting so many members for? Are you planning to set up an American football team?”

  “My SOS Brigade must go global as fast as possible. Isn’t hard drive space increasing all the time as well? My target is the entire world. If we do not globalize, how can we survive in this globalizing world?”

  So globalization comes after the information age? I still like my current humble life more. My current status is a high school student without any proper credentials anyway. I am not so oblivious to my own limits as to globalize a simple brigade like this.

  Why don’t you find a place and set up a private school next time and become its principal and name it the SOS School instead? You can then force everyone to become SOS Brigade members at that time. Hmm…… now that I think about it, such a thought is rather scary.

  “Haha, that is so stupid, I don’t want to set up a business.” Haruhi exclaimed with laughter. “We are not profit-driven!”

  This could be considered an improvement. Although she spewed a whole lot of unrealistic things, but if it was the Haruhi of last year, she would have insisted on attending the clubs and societies briefing and printed large volumes of SOS Brigade fliers and distributing a piece to any random person. I don’t know if it is because of that strict student council president with his shining eyes, but Haruhi has gone underground instead.

  It seems that while she still plans to have multiple SOS Brigade branches, she isn’t yet willing to accept anyone that comes by the brigade headquarters. I guess she hopes that every member who joined the brigade would bring her a strange surprise. For example, victims of alien abductions, time travelers waking up and finding themselves in the past, espers fighting bad guys in alternate dimensions, people like that. These would be the types she definitely wanted to hear from.

  Those things used to be what I wanted to hear too.

  But, at this moment, I no longer find them a necessity.

  I am playing chess with Koizumi, sipping on the tea prepared by Asahina-san to moisten my throat, using the corner of my eye to monitor Nagato, who is sitting in a corner in the correct sitting posture, reading a book, all the while thinking about…

  The official members of SOS Brigade shouldn’t be increasing anymore, right?

  Even though we have people like Tsuruya as our Honorary Advisor, Sakanaka a non-member supporter, or when we take over clubs like what we did with the Computer Research Society, it is very unlikely that there would be new members who can join us five, who already have our roots deeply embedded in the brigade, and stay for long. That is what I predict would happen.

  12 A Swiss psychiatrist who was on very good terms with Sigmund Freud till they experienced a theoretical divergence, when they stopped working together. This is just my prediction after all, and there isn’t any reason that justifies this. I only subconsciously felt so, and the reason for this would best be explained by Carl Gustav Jung[12].

  In the end, my prediction was half-correct and half-wrong. But, I must add a classic sentence here…… the current me is obviously unable to predict what would happen in the future.

  I guess no one would have expected such a troublesome thing to happen, no matter if the person was Koizumi, Nagato, or perhaps even Asahina-san (big) as well.

  As for the source of all these troubles, it can be no one else other than Suzumiya Haruhi.

  Chapter 1

  It happened the next day, a Friday.

  That habit of Haruhi’s from the first year, leaving class for most of the break time, is still conducted daily even though it’s a new year. So it was no surprise that when the bell rang, signifying the end of fourth period, our brigade leader immediately vanished. I, also in my second year, still ate lunch with Taniguchi and Kunikida at the same table.

  I don’t care about Taniguchi, but once I see Kunikida’s harmless face, I can’
t help but think of Sasaki, whom I’d met several days earlier. I tried not to make it obvious so that he wouldn’t notice, but he saw me looking at him.

  “What’s the matter? Do you really like omelettes so much?”

  Kunikida acted exactly like Sasaki said he would and replied ‘lightly’.

  “No, nothing.”

  I immediately replied.

  “I’m just surprised we still managed to get put in the same class.”

  “That’s true.”

  Stopping those hands of his that had been continuously separating and scattering the okazu (side dishes), Kunikida lifted his head.

  “I’m very happy. When I first saw the class listings, I almost couldn’t believe my eyes.”

  I had certainly been sure that you were going to be in the sciences class.

  “That’s what I was going to do at first. But I’m not very good at humanities, so I want to use this year to get better at them. I’ll prioritize the sciences when we get to our third year. Also, in the second year, they start to categorize both the Humanities and the Sciences. That means there are a lot more choices for classes, and running around to get to them all becomes very tiring, especially by the second semester.” (!)

  As for Taniguchi… Meh, I don’t really care what happened here.

  “Hey, that’s cruel, Kyon,” Taniguchi protested. “I originally wanted to get into a class with prettier girls. My goal was something along the lines of Class six……”

  With that, his gaze started to slide towards the girls in our class.

  “Look, absolutely nothing has changed. And I’m still with you guys……”

  He’s still such a vulgar rascal, that much hasn’t changed. I guess that’s good. We’ll do the same thing as last year, and ‘Help please!’ on the tests. (!)

  “This I can promise you: I will not let that piece of paper change my life(!). Leave it to me.”

  The way you pound your chest and assert that does make me feel a bit better, but I wonder if you could live up to such exaggerated claims. I would have no complaints if Taniguchi had some latent abilities or special talents to back that statement up. If that was the case, I might have a chance at convincing my mother that grades are just meaningless numbers.