Deep is the Heart

by A. V. Zeppa

  This is a work of fiction. The events and characters described herein are imaginary and are not intended to refer to specific places or living persons. The opinions expressed in this manuscript are solely the opinions of the author and do not represent the opinions or thoughts of the publisher. The author has represented and warranted full ownership and/or legal right to publish all the materials in this book.

  Author’s Disclaimer: This book is a work of fiction. It is a story written entirely from the author’s imagination. Any reference to historical events, real people, or real locations is used fictitiously. The characters and events in the story are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead is entirely coincidental.

  Deep Is The Heart

  All Rights Reserved.

  Copyright © 2015 A.V. Zeppa

  v4.0 r1.0

  Cover Photo © 2015 istockphoto.com. All rights reserved - used with permission.

  This book may not be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in whole or in part by any means, including graphic, electronic, or mechanical without the express written consent of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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  PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

  In the garden of dreams

  there is an awakening of spirit without compromise

  it is hidden between the heart and mind

  and the reality of the journey forward.

  Those perfect footsteps and youthful innocence

  are imperfections that make it human.

  Deep is the Heart

  CONTENTS

  CHAPTER 1: David

  CHAPTER 2: Marco

  CHAPTER 3: Tyler

  CHAPTER 4: David

  CHAPTER 5: Marco

  CHAPTER 6: David

  CHAPTER 7: Marco

  CHAPTER 8: David

  CHAPTER 9: Marco

  CHAPTER 10: David

  CHAPTER 11: Marco

  CHAPTER 12: David

  CHAPTER 13: Marco

  CHAPTER 14: Skyping

  CHAPTER 15: David

  CHAPTER 16: Marco

  CHAPTER 17

  CHAPTER 18

  Part Two

  CHAPTER 19

  CHAPTER 20

  CHAPTER 21

  CHAPTER 22

  CHAPTER 23

  CHAPTER 24

  CHAPTER 25

  CHAPTER 26

  CHAPTER 27

  CHAPTER 28

  CHAPTER 29

  CHAPTER 30

  CHAPTER 31

  CHAPTER 32

  CHAPTER 33

  CHAPTER 34

  CHAPTER 35

  CHAPTER 36

  CHAPTER 37

  CHAPTER 38

  CHAPTER 39

  CHAPTER 40

  CHAPTER 41

  CHAPTER 42

  CHAPTER 43

  CHAPTER 44

  Part Three

  CHAPTER 1

  David

  OCTOBER

  On a clear autumn evening near the shores of Lake Michigan the night sky welcomed billions of stars once again. David walked up the hill behind his house knowing it was going to be another perfect night for viewing. He had his backpack on and his telescope carefully cradled in both arms, holding it against his chest. He was carrying it to his favorite place in the whole world. This nightly ritual was David’s way of traveling to the stars, a place that truly felt like home.

  He put the telescope methodically in place when he got to the top, and then took his headphones out of the backpack and adjusted them over his beanie. His iPod contained every album made by Rush, a rock group he really liked. 2112 was his favorite. Listening to Rush while stargazing took him to places no one knew about. It was his own secret world. He cranked up the volume and then synced the telescope with earth’s orbit.

  David could always feel the harmony between music and the universe. The combination of those two entities reverberated through his thin pale body, making his neural wiring fly at the speed of light. He looked deep into the crystal darkness as the music summoned the universe to respond in its own solitary way. In an instant the Northern Lights made their first appearance of the year dancing hypnotically just for him. His smile grew wide because he knew it couldn’t get any better than that. He wished his friends could see the significance of it all, but they rarely hung out with him when he did his geeky science stuff.

  David spent his nights studying math, physics, and the universe while other people at school partied, got drunk, and smoked weed. His ultimate goal was to become a physicist like his heroes Albert Einstein, Carl Sagan, and Benjamin Eldridge.

  That goal was closer than he realized because of a letter he had received earlier in the day. David was usually the first one home so he always got the mail before heading inside. He opened the mailbox and a letter from Columbia University was staring back at him. He froze for a couple of seconds, afraid to touch it. But he quickly let go of the negative thoughts and reached in, hoping for the best. He stood in the driveway reading the simple measured words he had longed to hear.

  Dear Mr. Emerson,

  It is our pleasure to inform you that you have been selected for a personal interview with Columbia Universities’ Office of Admissions. You have been selected to the next level in the Early Decision process because of your SAT score, your personal essay, and your academic background. It is apparent that you are a hardworking, very responsible and dedicated young man. We are proud to extend this invitation to the next step of your academic career with a personal interview on Saturday, October 10th at 11:00 am. The interview will take place at Pupin Hall, room 514, located on Columbia’s Morningside Heights Campus. Once again, congratulations on being selected for a formal interview.

  Sincerely,

  Stacy M. Bergen

  Admissions Officer

  David must have read the letter at least ten times hoping the reality of it would finally sink into his brain. As his telescope moved with earth’s orbit, so did his thoughts. He sat there with headphones blaring, and that vast expanse above him applauding, while he tried to grasp how close he was to his perfect dream. He didn’t know whether to smile or cry.

  He secretly wished he had that special someone to share the moment with, but knew he’d never find that person in a remote place like Harbor Springs. That was the harsh reality of being gay in the middle of nowhere. He also understood how hard it was going to be to leave home. But he knew he had to in order to achieve his dream, and maybe find that special guy who had to be out there somewhere.

  David often wondered what it felt like to have a boyfriend, but it was impossible to find out since he was the only openly gay guy at school. Most of the guys avoided him like the plague. And if they did acknowledge him, it was only to call him a faggot or queer. It had been that way ever since coming out in middle school.

  David came out to his parents at the age of twelve. It was one of the hardest things he had ever done because he was afraid they would hate him. He thought about staying in the closet until he got older, but knew he would end up hating himself. So he confidently let his mother and father know, hoping for the best. His mom took it pretty well, but his dad…he just got up and walked out of the room. He looked at his mom and the tears came. She kissed him on the cheek and left. He sat there waiting, hoping they would come back. It happened minutes later, but his dad wouldn’t look at him. He stared at the air and the walls and his hands while his mom asked questions.

  The two of them tried to logically work through what it was all going
to mean. She told him the truth. That being gay in a small conservative town would make his life extremely difficult. David understood her concerns, but he also understood that he couldn’t hide that part of his DNA for one second longer.

  There was the obvious adjustment period for his family, especially his dad. He was ashamed and embarrassed about having a gay son. But when David was severely beaten by four homophobic boys in middle school a few months later, he broke down and begged for his forgiveness. Now their relationship has never been stronger.

  David noticed a silhouette out of the corner of his eye slowly coming up the hill, jarring his mind out of the past. He hoped it was his father. They always had nice talks whenever they stargazed together. It was a way to see another side of the person who had brought him into the world. His father wasn’t some big fancy executive or a person of prominence in the community. He never even finished college because love got in the way. David knew how different they were in many respects, but they did share a philosophical bond that made both of them view the world with optimistic eyes.

  But as the silhouette got closer, he could tell it was Tyler, his best friend and secret crush. He took his headphones and beanie off and shook his shaggy blond hair to make himself look presentable. He watched Tyler stop a couple of times and look up. He smiled because it looked like the Northern Lights were coming right down on top of him.

  “Well, I see you have a front row seat again,” Tyler said, plopping down next to David.

  “This is fucking awesome. I have to come out here more often.”

  “Yeah, it’s unbelievable tonight.” David leaned back on his elbows to get a better view. Tyler leaned back too so they could be shoulder to shoulder. Neither one said a word for a minute or so. David eventually broke the silence. “What are you thinking about?”

  Tyler was thinking about one thing in particular but was petrified to talk about it. He asked something else instead. “Do you think there are other worlds out there with people like us? I mean, we can‘t be the only people in the whole fucking universe, right?”

  “With all of the exoplanets astronomers are now finding, I would think there are millions of planets that could support life as we know it. So yeah, I think there are intelligent beings out there like us.”

  “What the fuck is an exoplanet?”

  “They are planets orbiting around distant suns. Astronomers are finding them by the hundreds. It‘s very cool.”

  “Do we have telescopes that can see them?”

  “No, not yet, unfortunately.”

  “So how do they know the planets are really there?”

  “Astronomers use something called radial velocity. They also use microlensing to detect them as well. Extremely small velocity variations can be seen through the displacement in the star’s spectral lines….”

  “Hey Einstein, STOP! STOP! I don‘t know what the fuck you‘re talking about anymore..lol

  It just seems crazy to think about other worlds and stuff.”

  “I guess it does seem a little weird. But even though most of the exoplanets they‘ve found are gas giants like Jupiter and Saturn, they have found a few terrestrial planets similar to earth orbiting around the sweet spot of their suns.”

  “What do you mean by terrestrial, and sweet spot?”

  “Earth is a rocky planet with an active core and it‘s in the perfect position relative to our sun to support life.”

  “Oh. Cool. That‘s kind of amazing when you think about it.”

  David started pointing out some of the constellations and then they took turns looking through the eyepiece. At one point David re-calibrated the telescope to show Tyler something unique.

  “Take a look at this.” Tyler looked and saw a fuzzy ball of light about the size of the moon.

  “What is it?”

  “It‘s the Messier 4 Globular Cluster in the constellation Scorpius. It‘s about 7,200 light years from our solar system and has some of the oldest stars in the universe. Cool, isn’t it?”

  “Yeah, I’ve never seen anything like it. Is it in our galaxy?”

  “Yes. Basically everything we‘re looking at right now is in the Milky Way. Less than a hundred years ago scientists thought the Milky Way was the entire universe. That is until Dr. Hubble discovered other galaxies.”

  “I didn’t know that.”

  David gazed ardently at Tyler’s handsome profile while he looked through the eyepiece. He sighed. His crush was getting the best of him. He wanted to tell Tyler how he felt, and almost did, but chickened out once again. They ended up talking about music, the Northern Lights, and the Tigers until he decided to tell Tyler about the letter. “I received some good news in the mail today.” Tyler turned towards him. “Oh yeah?”

  “Yeah. I got a letter from Columbia University. They want to interview me. I’ve made it to the next level of their admissions process.”

  “Are you kidding me? That’s fucking awesome.” Tyler gave him a congratulatory hug, making David’s body instantly come alive. “I can’t believe that I might actually get in.

  The thing is, they only admit approximately eleven percent who apply, so the odds aren’t in my favor. But at least they want to interview me.”

  Tyler knew how important this was to David because it was all he had talked about since ninth grade. “They’d be fucking idiots not to accept you. You’re everything they’re looking for. I mean you got a perfect 2400 on your SAT. You’re a goddam genius in math and physics. What more could they want?”

  “Please quit saying the genius thing, ok?”

  “Sorry. I guess I’ll just keep the truth to myself then.” Tyler smiled. David smiled.

  “Well it’s probably not enough, but I guess I’ll find out in a week. My dad and I are flying to New York next Friday. I’m really excited and really scared.”

  “Man, I can’t believe my little David might become an Ivy Leaguer.”

  “I’m happy that I at least have a chance. I don’t care about the whole Ivy League thing. I want to go there because they have one of the best math and physics programs in the world.” Tyler gave him a knowing grin. “And let’s not forget about that Eldridge guy being a professor there.” David smiled at his keen perception. “That’s a big reason too. I want to take every class he teaches if I get in. He is one of the leading physicists in the field of String Theory.”

  David felt good about how everything was coming together, and that he got to share the news with his best friend. That meant the most.

  A few minutes later Tyler finally got to the reason why he stopped by. “Melissa’s having movie night tonight and she sent me here to make sure you come this time.”

  “I’m up for a movie. Sounds like fun. What are we going to see?”

  “The Signal. We have to be there by ten.”

  “I don’t like scary movies, you know that.”

  “Come on, they’re fun. And anyway, I heard this one isn’t gory. Please come.”

  “Honestly, those movies give me the creeps.”

  “I’ll protect you. I promise. I’ll put my arm around you and hold you and I won’t even try to cop a feel.” Tyler bumped his shoulder against David’s and grinned.

  “Yeah, and if you do that everyone will think you’re gay.”

  “I don’t care. You’re my best friend and if I wanna hold you then I’m gunna hold you. Ok?”

  “Ok. Thanks.”

  “Anytime.”

  Then David’s smile faded. “Is Brad going to be there?”

  “Probably. Is he bothering you again?”

  “Yeah. He’s been picking on me more than usual lately. He hates me and lets me know every chance he gets.”

  “I’m going to kick his fucking ass tonight.”

  “Please don’t. I don’t think Melissa would appreciate it. Thanks for offering though. He just spews his little gay jokes at me and I ignore him. I don’t think he would physically hurt me, although it looks like he wants to at times.”

  “He
picks on you because he’s insecure, and you scare him. He can’t compete with you, so giving you shit is the only way he can feel good about himself. I can’t figure out why Melissa even likes him. I mean his personality sucks and I’ve seen him in the showers. Believe me, it’s nothing to write home about,” Tyler said, trying to make David laugh.

  “Come on, be nice.” That visual made David giggle. “He’s jealous because Melissa and I are close and he doesn’t want anyone butting in on his boyfriend time. He’s even told her that he doesn’t want her hanging out with me anymore.”

  “What a pin dick. Fuck him. I’ll talk to Melissa and get this shit straightened out.”

  “Don’t worry. We’ve already talked and she isn’t going to let him control her life.”

  “Well, little old Brad and I are going to have some words very soon.”

  David looked up at Tyler’s shadowed face and smiled. “Let’s pack everything up so we can get scared out of our minds.” They stood next to each other, their fingertips just inches apart as they looked skyward one last time before making their descent back to earth.

  CHAPTER 2

  Marco

  OCTOBER

  The Upper East Side of New York City has always been an oasis of wealth, style, and creature comforts most teenagers only dream about. It is a Garden of Eden for the chosen few who are lucky enough to have been born into that alternate universe. Marco Valerio was one such teenager.

  Marco lived in a two-story Park Avenue penthouse and attended Pembrooke Academy, one of the finest private college preparatory high schools on the Upper East Side. It was located in a seven story 1920s Art Deco building on Madison Avenue. He had everything a senior in high school could ever imagine: wealth, good looks, intelligence, and an exceptional gift for writing.

  Marco wasn’t some stuck up rich kid like a lot of people at his school, but he was self-assured and driven by his passions. His priorities were really quite simple. He loved to write, he loved to hang out with friends, and he loved to have sex with the endless supply of hot guys who were constantly hitting on him. That was his one true weakness. But those attributes, and his sexual appetite, made him one of the most popular guys at school.