Intentional
Page 19
“Cade, I have a lot to tell you about. It’s mostly about Sarah.” He looks a little relieved at the direction of our conversation. I don’t think he’ll feel that way for long. “Sarah was the cause of the breakup between Jeremy and me.”
He exhales. “I already know that, Mattie. She slept with your fiancé.” He looks irritable.
I respond, “Actually, Cade, that never happened. It was staged—by Sarah. She drugged him. Cade, Jeremy never betrayed me.”
Cade looks at me in shock. I can see the changes happening on his face as the information starts to register. He keeps staring hopefully at my face. I shake my head no, and the tears start to fall. Cade gets it. It’s like his whole body deflates. He lies down on the bed next to me. He picks up one of my hands and puts it up against his face. It’s like he’s cherishing our last moments together.
“I knew you still loved him, even after what you thought he did to you—even after all of that, you couldn’t stop yourself.”
I’m full-out crying now. “You know how hard I tried. On Saturday, I was going to tell you how I was feeling. Cade, I was falling for you, hard and fast.”
He replies softly, “Me too.”
I continue, “Even though I was successful at getting Jeremy out of my system, I discovered that I shoved out the cheater Jeremy. When I heard the truth about what really happened, it’s like the last nine months just went away. Sarah stole nine months from us—I won’t let her take any more.”
Cade is nodding his head. “I understand, Mattie. I really do.”
He gets up off the bed and walks over to the window. He stares out at nothing for what seems like hours. Finally, he says, “Can I say one last thing?”
“Of course,” I say.
He smiles at me. “That was the best damn kiss I’ve ever had!”
I have to laugh. Oh, Cade. I’m going to miss him so much. My eyes fill with tears. He leans over and whispers in my ear, “Remember that first day we met?” I nod. “Remember the question you asked me? You asked if I’d ever had my heart broken, and I told you no. I’d like to change my answer.” He takes my hands and kisses them both. I see tears in his eyes. As he’s leaving, I hear him say, “I’m going to miss you so much,” but he doesn’t look back. He goes out the door.
Wednesday
Jeremy
I’m in the waiting room, collecting my thoughts, when Cade walks out of Mattie’s room. He looks upset. He spots me, groans, and comes over to where I’m sitting. He sits down and pauses before he speaks. “I’ve never met anyone like Mattie before—ever. I doubt I ever meet anyone who comes close. Mattie was it for me. I guess you feel the same way.”
I nod, speechless. He continues, “Even with all the feelings I had for her, I knew something was holding her back. I knew it was you. I can’t tell you how many times I wanted to travel to Sedona, just to have the joy of punching you out. You hurt Mattie—okay, now we know it was Sarah, but that’s what we all thought. Did you know that on Saturday, that was our first kiss?” I shake my head. “She was emotionally holding on to you. She couldn’t help herself. I knew when she told me about Sarah, how she manipulated both of you, I didn’t have a chance. I knew that her love for you would come rushing back. I don’t think I need to tell you how I feel right now.”
Cade pauses, rubbing his face. “I do have to say this: If you do anything to hurt her, ever, I will hunt you down and make you pay. And I will do it with pleasure. You got that?”
I guess that’s as good as I can expect, coming from him. “Sure, you’ve got yourself a deal.” We shake hands. I never thought that would happen.
I wait a few minutes before entering Mattie’s room. She’s been crying. I know how much she hates hurting people. This must be so hard for her. I walk over and sit on the end of the bed. “I get to go home today.” She doesn’t look excited about it.
I ask, “And that’s good?” She laughs at my question. A thought occurs to me. What if she doesn’t pick anyone? Maybe this whole experience has made her decide to swear off all men.
She clears her throat. “Jeremy, first I want to tell you how sorry I am.” My eyebrows lift. “I blocked you out. I should have confronted you, asked you what happened. I couldn’t, though; I couldn’t see you. I was in too much pain.” She continues, “If we had talked it out in person, maybe we would have been able to put it together—that Sarah had set the stage and we were her pawns.”
I’m adamant in my response. “No, Mattie, I don’t think we would have seen it back then. No one knew how twisted, devious, and sick Sarah was until last Saturday.” I hesitate before I continue, “I found out that Sarah lied about Evan back in college. He was telling the truth—he never cheated on you, Mattie.”
She gives me a knowing look. “Yes, after everything I’ve learned about Sarah, I figured that out. It doesn’t make a difference, Jeremy.”
I feel relieved for a moment, but there is something else I need to say. “Mattie, do you remember when Evan came to my office that night?” She nods once. “All I cared about was having him gone, no matter what. I was only thinking about myself and what I needed. I knew I couldn’t lose you. I was so desperately in love with you that I was blind to what you needed or wanted.” I grab for the extra water bottle that’s on the table and take a few sips. “Even though I wouldn’t wish these past nine months on my worst enemy, I can tell you that I have learned a lot.” I pick up her hand and kiss it gently. “I’ve been forced to take a good long look at myself, especially these past few days. Mattie, I’ve discovered what love really is. My journey back to you has made me realize that I love you so much, so completely, that I am willing to do anything for your happiness. If that doesn’t include me, then I will do whatever you need to move on from all of this.”
She pauses for a moment. “I’ve learned a lot about myself as well, Jeremy.” Her eyes fill with tears. “I will tell you what happened to me, why I moved here, everything. But first I want you to know something.” She looks at me tenderly. “In all the time we’ve been apart, I never once stopped loving you.”
Before I get too excited, I have to ask, “Does that mean that we can be together? Because God, Mattie, I want that more than life itself.” I’m feeling my eyes start to water. This is it—her next words will decide whether I live a happy life or a life filled with loneliness and regrets.
She looks at me with clarity. “Jeremy, you are mine. Remember? Do you remember our promises? I thought you had broken your promise. You didn’t, Jeremy. I’ve never stopped wanting you, missing you. I need you too. I want to build a life with you. What did you do with my ring, anyway?” She’s smiling over at me. I feel the relief surge through my body. I don’t have to let her go.
Mattie
Wednesday
I see Jeremy put his hands over his face. He’s shaking—his whole body is shaking. Is he laughing? He looks up at me; tears are streaming down his face. He’s crying! I try to get up to go to him; I want to comfort him. He says, “No, no, you lie back down. It’s okay. I’m okay. It’s just that I didn’t know what you were going to say. I’ve been so worried.”
He takes me gently in his arms. I can feel his tears as he holds me close against his face. “I’m never letting you of my sight, ever again.” I know Jeremy; he’ll back off—eventually. I ask, “Stalker much?”
He answers, “You have no idea.”
We lie in bed and laugh together for the first time in nine months. It feels right. I look over at him. “Can we stay here? In Seattle? Well, I like Mercer Island best—as long as they don’t put those stupid tolls on the bridges.” Jeremy is looking at me with a what the heck are you talking about? look. I laugh at his expression. “It’s a long story.”
I ask hopefully, “Do you think you could be happy living here? I love it here so much.”
Jeremy looks at me. “Anything. I’ll do anything for you.”
We stayed in bed lying together for hours before my release, talking, laughing, and making plans for o
ur future. Jeremy is going to move his practice to Mercer Island or Seattle—with or without his partner. He’s going to sell his house so we can buy a house together here. We start to plan our wedding again. I can’t believe everything is clicking back in place so smoothly. I’m holding him, feeling him against me. The feeling of love washes over me as I look into his beautiful eyes again. I am so excited to start our new life together.
I can’t help thinking about Cade. I know he’s hurting. We’ve become so close in the past few months. Once I found out the truth about Jeremy, I could feel my developing feelings for Cade take a shift. It is impossible for me to love two men at the same time. That’s what was holding back Cade and me all this time. I think we both knew that I still loved Jeremy. Hopefully, this hasn’t been too big of a shock for him. I will always care about Cade. He’s such a great guy. I know he’ll find someone that is perfect for him.
Epilogue
Two Years, Two Months Later
Mattie
I’m so excited! I’ve planned this birthday party for Colton for months. I’ve invited all of our friends. I’ve been baking for two days straight! I want everyone to have fun; this is a happy occasion. I double-check everything—napkins out, check. Bar stocked, check. Food out, almost check (I have some warming hors d’oeuvres in the oven). I have to remind myself to get them out after everyone arrives. I’m feeling a little nervous. This is my first time hosting a birthday party. I want it to be just right.
I hear a voice call out to me, “You need anything, honey? Can I help?”
I answer, “No, I got this. I’ll just need to you get the door once the guests arrive.”
He says, “I love you! Thanks for doing this—you’ve been working so hard!”
I walk over to kiss him. He’s not ready yet! He’s shirtless, and his hair is wet and mussed up. I can’t resist. I rub my hands over his chest. “Maybe we can be a little late?” He throws his head back and laughs. At that moment I hear the door chime. “Drat!” I say. He grabs me, holds me close, and gives me a lusty kiss. I love him so much.
“Later, baby.” He gives me a swat and sends me to the door. Oh, I’ll get him later!
I answer the door. Our first official guests are Julianne and Sam. She rushes in and gives me a hug. “Thanks for inviting us!”
“Of course! You were my first friends when I moved here, remember? This wouldn’t be a party without you!” I invite them into the living room and ask them to make themselves at home.
I go back to the kitchen to finish up my prep work. I need my doorman—and now! I walk back to the bedroom. I stop in my tracks. The sweetest scene is unfolding right before my eyes. It’s Colton—he’s on the bed, laughing hysterically. Jeremy is tickling him. Oh, those two! They are forever goofing around. “Please get the birthday boy dressed! People are starting to arrive. I need my doorman!”
Jeremy smiles back to me, gives me a salute “Yes, ma’am!” Colton looks at our exchange and giggles even more. He is the most beautiful child I have ever seen. I can’t believe he’s already a year old!
The door chimes again. I skip back to the door and see that it’s Jeremy’s partner, Don Schweet, and his wife, Jeannie. They are standing outside, smiling, with the biggest box they could possibly hold. I exclaim, “Oh my goodness! Whatever you brought is huge!”
Don laughs. “I needed something huge for that big ego of your husband’s! He never stops bragging about you and Colton. Enough already!”
Jeannie smiles warmly at me and rubs my arm. “Try to ignore him—he’s just jealous!”
I’m so grateful that Don was okay about moving their law firm to Seattle. When Jeremy asked him (probably more like pleaded), Don shrugged his shoulders and said, “Aw, heck, a city is just a city, Seattle, Sedona…they even sound alike!” I laugh to myself when I remember that conversation—the two cities couldn’t be more different.
The party is in full swing. I’m looking around for Cade. Where is he, anyway? I am so happy that we were able to salvage our relationship. It was uncomfortable and a little rocky for a while, but we got through it. Cade and Jeremy even get along! That was the most interesting friendship to develop. Once Cade understood that Jeremy was innocent of all wrongdoing, they forged a slow, cautious friendship. Of course, Jeremy is very careful to never leave me alone in the same room when Cade visits, or when we go to watch Hard Reign perform. Jeremy keeps a watchful eye on Cade. Especially since Cade hasn’t found a girlfriend yet. I don’t think he’s even dating. I keep reassuring Jeremy that Cade’s feelings for me are now platonic, but he always shakes his head. “No, Mattie, I don’t believe that, not for one second. I would never get over you. Ever.”
I smile. “That’s because we were meant for each other. Soul mates. He’ll find his—hopefully soon.”
I look down the driveway. Finally! Cade has arrived. He’s brought someone—a girl! Oh, I hope she’s nice. I look closer. It looks like he’s scowling over at her. Are they fighting? He comes to the door. I pull it open quickly. “Cade! I’m so glad you made it!”
Of course Jeremy appears out of nowhere. He says, “Hi, Cade. Who’s the girl? Did you go out and get yourself a girlfriend?”
Cade and his mystery girl both say in unison, “No!” They look at each other. I see the side of Cade’s mouth tilt up; he’s trying not to smile.
He says, “Please meet my agent, Laurel Lawson.” She smiles up at us. “So pleased to meet you. Cade and I were just discussing the launch of his music career.” Oh, that was the conflict in the driveway. I look at Laurel; she is absolutely stunning. She has beautiful, long golden-brown hair. She’s tall, around five feet nine. Her face is round and a little exotic.
I put out my hand and say, “Hi, I’m Mattie.” I see her eyes widen slightly. She recovers and looks over at Cade. I wonder if she’s looking to see if there’s a reaction from him. He’s ignoring her and asking where the big boy is.
Jeremy answers, “Right here!”
“Ha ha!” We all laugh.
We have a packed house within an hour. I’m so glad all the guys from the band could make it. Of course I get my big hug and kiss from Scott, as usual. Jeremy always laughs when this happens. Scott and Jeremy get along really well. They like to joke and laugh together. Scott always gets away with his constant flirting with me. Jeremy just goes along with it. He’ll say, “Bastard, she’s mine!”
Scott will respond, “Not if I have any say in it!” Scott has been known to toss me over his shoulder and shout out to whoever will listen, “She’s mine! All mine!” Boys!
If Cade were to do the same thing? There would be fur flying. I don’t think Jeremy will ever be totally comfortable with Cade. I try to reassure him, and he listens, but I don’t think he will ever get over seeing us kiss like that. I guess I can’t blame him—I never even saw him kiss Sarah—just the thought of it put me over the edge.
I can’t help but to watch the interactions unfold between Cade and Laurel. There is tension between them. I’m trying to decipher what type of tension it is. Is it angry tension or sexual tension? They stand apart for most of the party. I can tell that they are trying not to look at each other, but as I watch, I see them both glance at each other ever so subtly throughout the party. I see their unguarded looks come and go swiftly across their faces. I smile to myself. Oh yes. Definitely sexual tension.
The End
Coming Soon—Unintentional
Cade’s story
Acknowledgments
To Tiny Doran for buying me my Kindle. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have read hundreds of romance novels. Also, I’m sorry for referring to your character in the book as a “slug.” I didn’t mean it.
To my own Mattie. Thanks for working so hard on the cover. When you’re old enough, I promise you can read all about Mattie, Jeremy, and Cade.
To Jean, Becca, and Julianne. I took a little from all of you for this book (Jean – your determination. Becca – your independence. Julianne – your vulnerability) Thank
s for being great daughters.
To Big Doran: Thanks for all of your support. You have endured countless frozen meals with grace. You have persevered through challenges in life that would have toppled the strongest of people. If everyone had just a tiny bit of your faith, this world would be a better place.
To Elore (Laurel) – Your sage advice throughout the years has been invaluable. You are an inspiration to me.
To Weiners (Jeannie) – You have never betrayed me! Haha. The times in my life I have laughed the hardest was with you. Thanks for that!
I would also like to thank Lindsay from CreateSpace for her insightful editorial evaluation. I loved your ideas, and if they weren’t implemented properly, I take full responsibility!
I want to thank anyone who reads this book! I had a great time writing it—I hope you had fun reading it!
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40