Embracing Her Ever After: A Sweet Romantic Comedy (ABCs of Love Book 5)

by Brenna Jacobs

  There was no telling when Tessa would be free and clear, but she definitely wasn’t in the position for a fun and temporary entanglement right now, and he wouldn’t ask it of her. Not when he couldn’t be sure that he wasn’t just falling into it because she was here right now, and he’d been hurting ever since Sarah. He knew himself well enough to know that a big part of the temptation here, beyond Tessa’s curves and the tilt of her lips when she smiled, was the built-in expiration on the whole situation stamped on his Air Suisse ticket.

  That didn’t mean he couldn’t soak in this moment on the sofa for as long as it lasted. But he really was going to have to find a way to slide upright without waking Tessa or his back and knees would rebel. As carefully as if he were handling molten tungsten, he eased one foot from the coffee table and then the other. She slept on, and he breathed a sigh of relief, but when he inched his way upright, she stirred. He froze, waiting for her to settle. Instead, she bolted upright.

  “Wha . . .”

  She blinked, a panicked look in her eyes as she scanned the room, her posture only relaxing the tiniest fraction when she spotted Calvin in his stroller. “He’s okay.”

  “Yeah,” Ethan said softly, and she started as if she hadn’t even registered that he was there.

  “Ethan.”

  “Hi. He fell asleep on his walk. You were passed out on the sofa when we came back. I meant to go home, but I sat down for a minute, and I think I fell asleep in about two seconds.”

  She settled back against the sofa, not seeming to realize how close they were sitting, barely a foot between them. Then she turned toward him and leaned into his chest. “I’m so tired.”

  She had to be. She’d never sought such a direct, physical connection to him before, but this was exhaustion speaking. Every word out of her mouth dripped with it, and it rose off the drooping lines of her body almost like waves. He put his arms around her and let her rest, fine if it meant she fell asleep again and trapped him in another uncomfortable position while he waited for her to wake.

  After a minute or two, her hand slid up his chest and rested against his neck, her fingers brushing the hair at the nape of his neck. Goosebumps popped out from his hairline all the way down his arms, and he sent up a prayer that this would be the only way his body betrayed him even though he’d never been a praying man.

  “I’m so tired, Ethan,” she said in a small voice.

  “You’re not sleeping enough.”

  “It’s not just that.”

  He kept quiet, leaving her space to explain if she wanted to. But he also wasn’t sure he could have spoken as her fingers continued to softly tickle above his collar.

  “Thank you for being here,” she finally said, her voice almost dreamy.

  Did she realize what her fingers were doing? Her half-asleep state could mean that she wasn’t even aware that she was touching him, like the way he sometimes caught himself drumming his fingers idly. But then her hand stilled and slid up again, this time so that her thumb brushed against the corner of his lips, and she raised her head again, staring at his mouth before she leaned up, her lips clearly about to replace her fingers.

  Oh, man. He watched her carefully, stunned and grateful that the moment he’d just discounted ever experiencing with her had suddenly arrived. He’d ached for this for months back in college, and now that it was here, he wanted to absorb every second of it, from the soft, maddening rasp of her thumb against his lips to the look in her eyes—

  Wait. They had the glazed look of someone who wasn’t fully present, and whatever else Tessa might be, she was always, always present. Carefully, he captured the tip of her wandering thumb in his mouth, sucking on it the tiniest bit to test her awareness. Her eyes flew open and she let go, straightening again, and this time when she blinked, Tessa was all the way back, alert and now looking wary.

  “What was that?” she asked.

  “I was wondering the same thing,” he said. He should probably feel embarrassed that she looked so appalled but the sudden pinkening of her cheeks made him fight a smile instead. He decided to savor the taste of her while she gathered her wits. He quietly watched her, waiting.

  “You shouldn’t . . .” she started and then trailed off before trying again. “Why did you . . .” But she stopped there too. Then she heaved a heavy sigh. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I was out of it.”

  That too might have bothered him except now he knew that when her defenses were down, she wanted him. And he was going to savor that right along with the taste of her skin, and the warm weight of her against him as she slept.

  “No problem,” he said, proud of himself when his voice came out evenly.

  “I really shouldn’t have—”

  But he didn’t want to hear her regrets; it was his turn to make a move, so he did, knowing she was fully awake and aware enough to pull away if she wanted to. He leaned toward her, giving her room to retreat, keeping his eyes locked with hers so she could read his intent. Instead of pushing him away or scrambling from the couch, her eyes fluttered closed. He wondered if she could feel his satisfied smile against her lips when he brushed his mouth against hers in an invitation.

  She stayed completely still, and when he pulled away the tiniest bit in a silent communication meant to ask if this was what she wanted, she closed the gap again.

  This time his kiss asked no questions as hers insisted that the kiss deepen, and he obliged, nearly sunk by the wave of feeling that crashed over him as he tasted her. She answered with a tiny groan, and it was more than he could take, this confirmation that even if he’d completely misread her all those years ago, she very clearly wanted him now. She twisted and rose to her knees to face him more fully, and he wrapped his arms around her waist to make it easier, pulling her into his lap as she melted against him.

  He could barely think over the rush of heat in his brain, across his cheekbones, and through his chest. Whatever he thought had simmered between them, he couldn’t haven’t imagined this, a fire that flashed white hot and burned all the way through, growing hotter when she whimpered against his mouth again and pulled away to kiss her way down his jawline and taste him where his neck met his jaw.

  He bit back a curse at suddenly discovering it was one of the most sensitive parts of his body. How had he not known that after twenty-eight years of living, and how had she found it in thirty seconds flat? He was angling to return the favor as her breaths came deep and fast, but a cry erupted from Calvin. They both froze.

  Then Tessa scrambled off him and nearly flung herself at the baby, fumbling to loosen his seat harness like both their lives depended on it, though his cry seemed to only have been a warning shot, and he subsided.

  “Tessa.”

  “Hang on.” She fussed with the harness longer than necessary and finally lifted Calvin to rest him against her shoulder, bouncing and shushing him though he still hadn’t cried again.

  Ethan slid to the edge of the cushion and rested his arms on his knees as he watched her, which he could safely do without her catching him since she wouldn’t look his way.

  “Tessa,” he finally repeated.

  “Yeah?” Still no eye contact.

  “Do I owe you an apology?” That got her attention.

  “No,” she said, almost sharply as her eyes flew to his. She took a deep breath. “No, of course not. I think it’s the other way around.”

  “You definitely don’t owe me an apology for anything.”

  “I owe you at least a dozen by my count.”

  “That kiss better not be one of them.” His eyes narrowed despite himself.

  “It’s the top of the list.”

  He was surprised by how much that stung. “Forget it. Seriously. I started it.”

  Her eyes fell. “I wish that were true. It would make this easier. But that was on me. I shouldn’t have . . .”

  What did she think she shouldn’t have done? Burrowed against him, sleep-flushed and irresistible? “I had no objec
tions.”

  “I wasn’t thinking,” she said.

  He smiled to know that he’d overloaded her circuitry enough to shut off her brain for once. He guessed it didn’t happen often.

  “It’s not funny,” she said, catching his smile. “I’ve dragged you out of the mountains to the desert, thrown you into a huge project with a do-or-die deadline, abandoned you the day you show up only to haul you out of bed in the middle of the night to babysit, and now I’m mauling you.”

  It all read so differently to him that he would have laughed if she didn’t look close to tears. Instead he said, “I volunteered for every one of those things. I was sick of Standard Labs and Helios is a much better way to pass time until my contract at Klieber starts, I know my way around a machine lab and Mary answered any questions I had, I offered to take a middle-of-the-night shift with the kid, and I kissed you first.”

  Somehow that last point was the most important to him. He’d learned to let women make the first move so he could be sure of what they wanted, but he had initiated that kiss, and he was taking full credit for one of the greatest ideas he’d ever had.

  “It was wrong.” She said it to the baby.

  “It felt very right.”

  She closed her eyes and bounced Calvin a little faster. “He’s hungry. Do you mind making him a bottle? Sorry.”

  He rolled his eyes, knowing she wouldn’t see him. If she apologized to him one more time, he was going to kiss the word right out of her mouth. “Sure,” he said. He guessed she wanted time to pull herself together, so he made the bottle, checking the formula’s temperature against his wrist before bringing it to her.

  “I’m sorry I kept you here so long,” she said, accepting it and cradling Calvin so he could drink more easily. “Thanks for helping out. You should go get ready for work, and I’ll see you there.”

  “I’ll swing by and get you.”

  “It’s fine. I told you yesterday that I’d drive myself.”

  It felt like the least efficient way possible for her to handle the situation, but her voice was tight, so he didn’t push the carpool issue. “Why don’t you at least let me feed him while you take a shower or something?”

  She met his eyes now, studying him for a few seconds. “Why are you doing this?”

  “Because it’s what I grew up with. When a baby needs help, you help. That hasn’t changed even though I haven’t lived around one since high school.”

  She shook her head. “Thanks, but you should go take care of yourself. You look like you slept in a pile of dirty laundry.” She softened the insult with a smile, and he let her get away with it. Not the insult, which was more like an accurate statement, but with her change of subject.

  “All right,” he said, heading for the door. “But we’re going to talk about this later.”

  “Can’t wait,” she muttered, and it sounded not a little sarcastic as he closed the door behind him.

  Chapter Nine

  Oh no, oh no, oh no.

  How could she have been so stupid?

  Tessa dropped her head against the shower tile and let the water beat on the back of her neck for a minute before she realized that she only had until the baby finished his bottle to get clean.

  She only shampooed her hair, not bothering with conditioner, did a quick wash of the rest of her, and did her best not to think about Ethan and her stupidity as she scrubbed at dry spots like they had personally offended her. When she was done, she poked her dripping head out of the shower door to peek at the baby in his carrier. He was still working on his bottle, which she had propped up on a folded towel at exactly the right angle for him to eat. She could have conditioned after all, but she didn’t bother, stepping out to give herself a vigorous toweling and change into work clothes.

  Maybe she’d eventually figure out the rhythm on this stuff and find time to condition her hair again, but for now, she’d have to make do with a French braid. It made her feel like a teenager again, but she’d be working with the CNC router today, and it was the easiest way to keep her hair completely out of her way.

  Calvin finished his bottle before she finished her braid, and she kept a wary eye on him as she raced through the plaiting and secured it with an elastic, ready to tie it off early and pick up the crying baby. But he merely watched her, and she scooped him up to burp him.

  He wiggled against her a few times, nestling into the crook of her neck before he gave a loud burp. She sighed that it was so easy until she felt a warm splash against her skin, and she whirled to examine her reflection in the mirror. It showed an impressive amount of spit-up dripping down her neck, into and over her blouse. But the baby looked happy.

  “At least you’re smiling,” she said. “I should have put a towel on my shoulder. That was my fault. Hang out on my bed for a second while I change.”

  She laid him in the middle of her queen-sized bed, which dwarfed him, but when he didn’t complain, she hurried to her closet to switch out her white button-down for the first blouse she came to, a plain turquoise one that looked better with necklaces or something to make it interesting, but what did she care? It’s not like anyone noticed in the lab.

  Although Ethan might . . . her hand drifted toward a purple one that always got her compliments from strangers, but she snatched her hand back and changed into the turquoise one. Thinking about Ethan is exactly how she’d landed in trouble this morning. Delicious trouble.

  Knock it off.

  She fetched the baby from the bed and discovered that he needed a new diaper, a new onesie, and her bedspread would need a thorough washing.

  She groaned and moved him to the floor. He kicked and protested so she fished a clean pair of balled socks from her drawer and handed it to him to play with. He gummed it happily, and she quickly stripped the blanket from the bed, ran downstairs for new pajamas and a diaper, and got him ready to go again.

  “I’m going to have to wash all your clothes again tonight. You’ve only got one set of clean clothes after this. Don’t poop on them, okay?” He kicked like he agreed with this plan.

  By the time she hauled all his gear out to the car and got to work, she was wishing she’d just endured the mortification of dealing with Ethan and accepted his offer to carpool again. She pulled into the parking lot more than twenty minutes late and had to text Mary.

  Can you come play Sherpa and help me get baby and gear inside?

  The answer was quick. Yep.

  But it wasn’t Mary who came out. It was Ethan, and before he could even rest his hand on her car trunk she said, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  The look he gave her suggested that he thought this was a very dumb thing to say. “Mary asked me to come and help, so I came to help. I wasn’t planning on a conversation.”

  “Good.”

  “Yet.”

  She scowled at him, but he ignored her and hefted the swing and the stroller onto the concrete.

  She set up the stroller then transferred the baby into it. He’d been relatively quiet this morning, and she’d noticed that other than wanting to be fed or needing a diaper change, it was usually his quietest part of the day.

  “He does okay in the mornings,” she told Ethan.

  He glanced at her as he scooped the swing over his shoulder. “That’s great?” He sounded unsure of why she might be telling him this.

  “I think it means we might get a lot of work done before he gets fussy again if we’re efficient.”

  She thought he mumbled something about “efficiency” under his breath, but when she glanced over her shoulder, he was only maneuvering the portable crib into place beneath his other arm so he could carry them both at once.

  “Where did that bounce seat thing go?” he asked. “He seemed to like that.”

  She winced. “I forgot it. It’s still in my garage. But that’s okay because I forgot to wash it, and it kinda, sorta really needs to be washed.”

  He wrinkled his nose and it made him unreasonably adorable. “I remember.�
��

  “I have to wash a lot of stuff tonight.” It was her turn to mutter as she pictured the growing pile of soiled linens and clothes in her bathroom.

  “What was that?”

  “Nothing.”

  They shuffled toward the building with their hodgepodge of stuff in tow. The receptionist and security guard both glanced their way but said nothing, leading Tessa to believe that Mary must have already set them straight about their new infant co-worker.

  It was a quiet, awkward elevator ride down, but Tessa was thankful for it, because it was better than Ethan making good on his threat to bring up her throwing herself at him in the throes of her exhaustion.

  Although she’d been pretty awake once he’d nipped her thumb. That had shot like electricity straight down to her toes.

  The second the elevator doors slid open, she pushed out ahead of Ethan and parked the stroller against the far wall. “Sorry I’m late,” she said to Mary. “There were some . . . incidents trying to get out of the house this morning.”

  “It’s fine.”

  Tessa was grateful once again that Mary wasn’t a micromanager. So long as the work got done, Mary didn’t worry overmuch about the details.

  “Can you set up the swing by my desk?” she asked Ethan as he set the crib down beside the stroller.

  “Sure.” He didn’t even look offended by the barely disguised order. It was one of the reasons she’d been so comfortable with him compared to other guys in their program. Her tendency to take charge not only didn’t faze him, but he seemed to respect it.

  That had worked well, because the more stressful her life got, the more she tended to take charge of things. She’d been the worst right around mid-terms and finals, and an absolute nightmare by the time their senior project was due, but even at her worst, when he’d finally had to intervene, he’d talked to her diplomatically, as if her constant barking at him hadn’t offended him in the least.