Dramatic, Mushy, Complicated Love

by Leah Sharelle

  “Don’t be like that, my beautiful sunflower,” Jeff cooed, helping me out of the luxury BMW, “a quick visit with Springy then off to see when your bundle of love is due.”

  I swear, if he starts singing, I will rip his dick off and shove it down his sunny throat.

  Putting both feet on the footpath, I took a good look at the storefront and nodded my head. “I have to admit I have missed this place.”

  “See! A positive attitude is all we need,” Jeff chanted, earning an eye roll from his lover.

  “He is a little too cheery in the mornings,” Michael apologised ruefully, taking my hand in his and started to lead me to the door.

  “Meadow!”

  Oh no! Spinning around in the direction where the shout of my name came from, I saw Luca running at full speed across the road. My traitorous heart and pussy reacted immediately as I soaked up at the sight of Luca’s strong body running to me. He was dressed in tight distressed denim and a white shirt that hugged every plain and ridge of his muscular chest. His face was a mixture of relief and anger as he looked from me to Michael, or rather Michael’s hand holding mine.

  “Luca.” His name like a prayer from my lips.

  “Get your fucking hands off my girlfriend,” Luca dangerously growled when he reached where we were standing.

  “Girlfriend?”

  “Go to hell, arsehole.”

  “Touch her and die, snake.”

  Jeff and Michael adding their own comments at the same time as me.

  He thinks we are still a couple?

  Seriously?

  “Luca, what on earth are you doing here?”

  “Meadow, please let go of that man’s hand. Please,” Luca pleaded, staring at Michael’s and my joined hands with a pained expression.

  I couldn’t help myself; loosening my fingers, I let my hand drop instead, putting it up for Luca to see, my eyes not leaving his face.

  “Meadow, this isn’t a good idea, remember what he did,” Jeff reminded me, coming closer to stand beside me in a protective gesture.

  “You think I would hurt her?” Luca gasped, ripping his gaze from me to glare at Jeff, then Michael. “I would pull my own heart out before physically hurting her.”

  “I’m not worried about that, as Meadow would never be with someone abusive,” Jeff retorted, “what I am worried about is her fragile heart; you stomped on it butt-hole and left her friends to help pick up the pieces. While you did what? Pander to your mother, the person that caused all this in the first place.”

  I wanted to shout at Jeff to shut up, to not yell at Luca, but my retort died on my tongue when a look of utter shame passed over Luca’s face. Intrigued, I allowed Jeff and Michael to continue their verbal attack, curious to know what caused that look from Luca.

  “You fucked up, hulk, now you have to live with it. Meadow lives with us now, and together the three of us will raise her baby in a happy home where she will always know that she is our only priority.” I schooled my face as Michael bullshitted and sprouted his lie, but inside I was laughing. There was no such plan to live with the couple; in fact, I couldn’t wait to get away from their constant supervision. Fluffed pillows and foot rubs had been nice for a week, but now I wished they would go on the cruise they’d postponed in preference to pampering me.

  “Like fuck,” Luca growled, stepping forward. “Meadow is carrying my baby and the only person she will be raising it with is me.”

  Focusing back on me, Luca shocked me by dropping to his knees in front of me, his hands going to my belly.

  “You look tired, baby,” he whispered, looking at me. Even on his knees, he was still tall enough to look me in the eyes, his height one of the many things I loved about him. I always felt protected with him around. The simplest touch, like his hands covering where our child lay inside me. This sent those all too familiar sparks shooting through my bloodstream. Awakening my desire like only Luca could.

  “Of course she is tired, she doesn’t sleep. I have to cuddle her all night just to keep her from tossing and turning,” Jeff bragged, playing the part of my protector to the hilt. The lovers were painting a picture of a threesome situation, and while it was amusing, despite the severity of the moment, it was dangerous to poke Luca too hard. One thing Luca didn’t like was the idea of me with anyone other than him.

  “Jeff please, enough,” I chided gently, “Luca thinks you are serious.”

  “And he would have continued to if you had not let the cat out of the bag sunshine,” Michael chimed in, shaking his head at me.

  “Oh Lord, save me,” I prayed, wishing that I’d gone to get ice cream instead of coming here to see Spring and help her with … she hadn’t actually told me why she asked for me to come to the shop, now that I thought about it. She babbled about stock and invoices, then shouted that she needed my help, and then hung up on me.

  Hmmm, I smell a rat.

  Michael and Jeff were on the same page, and that rarely happened; in fact, Michael hated it when Jeff lied, and he almost never instigated a confrontation. Especially with a man the size of Luca. A slight movement in the window of my shop caught my attention. Looking that way, I spied Spring and Ace, hiding behind the Venetian blind and the light bulb went off.

  No wonder Jeff found his masculine side, taunting Luca with tales of sleeping in the same bed with me, cuddling and such. With Ace nearby, Jeff didn’t have to worry about Luca pounding him into the ground.

  Suddenly, I felt bone tired. Tired of being played, tired of being alone … just tired.

  “I think we should go to my appointment now,” I told Michael, moving back a step, so Luca’s hands dropped from my belly. I couldn’t think with him touching me and looking at me like I hung the moon.

  “Baby, please.”

  “No, Luca, not now. I can’t get into what happened with you now.”

  “Then when Meadow? When the baby is born? Or should we wait until he or she finishes primary school?” His sarcasm was not lost on me, nor was it appreciated.

  “How about when your mum says it is okay? When she gives you permission to be an adult and make your own decisions,” I countered angrily, instantly regretting my outburst when Luca gaped at me.

  “Ha! Good one, sunflower,” Jeff crowed, poking his tongue out at Luca, showing the real Jeff.

  Covering my face with my hands, I took three deep breathes. I did not want to be like Luca’s family, always throwing insults around, nasty tones and cruel taunts. That wasn’t Luca and me. He still thought there was a chance for us, and maybe there was, and maybe there wasn’t. But the fact remained we were having a baby together and life would be much sweeter if we weren’t at each other’s throats tossing out blame.

  “Luca, if you want to come to my appointment, you are welcome to,” I offered, looking at the man I loved more than life.

  “Michael, can we just leave now please, I have a headache all of a sudden.” Turning around, I headed back to the car.

  “Meadow, let me drive you, I promise not to talk, just let me be the one to drive you.” Luca looked at me with pleading brown eyes.

  Slowly I shook my head, putting a hand on the door handle.

  “It’s the clinic on Eureka street, the new one.” Shaking off Jeff when he tried to open the door for me. “Don’t push it, buddy, I am not in the mood after your tall tale of our supposed love fest.” Yanking open the door, I plopped down into the soft leather, looking up when I heard the clatter of the Venetians moving.

  “You, I will deal with later!” I shouted at my sister. “Be afraid, Spring, be very afraid!”

  Closing the car door, I shut out Luca’s pleading as the tears I thought had all dried up flowed down my face.

  I sat on the arsehole hand holder’s bumper to make sure he didn’t try something stupid like lose me on the way to the clinic. In the back of the car, I could see Meadow sitting straight and not moving, her blonde hair like a beacon. I resented every intersection when I had to look away from her to watch for traf
fic, taking my focus off my stunner.

  I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw her get out of the back of the strange car. In the three weeks we have been apart, she’d lost weight too much weight. Her skin pale, her eyes normally so bright, were now tired and sad. I came close to falling to my knees when she looked at me, running towards her, seeing her so different and yet the same. The way she whispered my name like a prayer gave me hope that I had not completely lost her.

  I didn’t mean to jump down her throat or speak so sternly to her. I didn’t mean to accuse her of keeping our child from me, but she was pushing me away by not letting me drive her or talk to her and explain myself. Didn’t she know I needed her to breathe? The last few weeks proved that, day after lonely day without her.

  Following the luxury European car driven by a dead man, I knew where we were heading to, but I didn’t trust whoever those two guys were not to pull a swiftie. Whoever they were to Meadow, I could tell she trusted them, and she wouldn’t let just any random blokes hold her hand or call her silly names of endearments. I thought at first one of them was her ex, Matt; jealousy reared its ugly head, and I was ready to take them both on–anything to get their hands off Meadow.

  Seeing that he was indicating to turn into a carpark, I copied swinging my car into the park directly beside them and quickly jumped out of the car, only barely taking time to cut the engine and shove the transmission into first. Getting to Meadow before one of the douche’s did what I was focused on doing.

  Darting around the car, I grabbed the handle and yanked open the door, my breath catching in my throat when Meadow looked up at me through her lashes.

  “Good driving, Spunk.” Her sass didn’t come with the bright smile or the spark in her green’s, but I would take anything as long as she kept calling me that name.

  “I didn’t trust them to try and lose me,” I admitted gruffly, “here, baby, let me help you.” Holding out my hand, Meadow placed hers in mine and allowed me to assist her out, thank fucking God! The stupid chatter from the morons continued from the footpath, and I did my best to ignore it. I hated that they had been looking after my girl and not me, but also grateful that she hadn’t been alone. My mother’s games had obviously taken their toll on Meadow, not helped by my less than stellar support.

  For the past two days, I had kicked my arse over and over after dealing with Mum. Finding out the truth of it, finally realising how blind I have been where my family was concerned really knocked the stuffing out of me. I had two days to come to terms with the fact that my mother may not ever be present in my life, spending all of yesterday at the cemetery sitting on the edge of my father’s marble grave talking it out with him.

  My main question is why? Why would Mum be so cruel, so conniving, and so hateful, going to the lengths she did? Was it forgivable? It took me hours to decide that only one person had the answer to that.

  Meadow.

  I was going to let her decide for the both of us, and no matter what she decided I vowed to accept and go along with it.

  “Something tells me they are in cahoots with Spring and Ace,” Meadow grumbled, easing to her feet, “they are just taking their roles in this play a little too seriously.”

  Wrapping an arm around her waist, I was shocked to feel the bones at her hip were much more noticeably prominent. And it didn’t escape me how she leaned against me for support, her tired sigh breaking my heart.

  Gently tightening my fingers at her hip, I growled under my breath, “Meadow, when was the last time you ate?”

  “I can’t keep too much down these days; just green tea and gummy bears seem to make the baby happy.”

  Biting my tongue, I refrained from voicing my disapproval. Meadow didn’t need me jumping down her throat again and not over something she really didn’t have any control over. Later, when we are back at my house … our house, I will have my say, but until then, I was here to support her and find out as much as possible about our unborn child and what I had to do to get Meadow physically healthy again.

  It didn’t take long to get signed in, then we took a seat in the waiting room, Meadow in my lap because I gave her no other option when I pulled her down on me, wrapping my arms around her while filling in her details. The whole time the two morons tossed out insults and pathetic attempts at scaring me. I ignored them and concentrated on the papers and Meadow. I lost count of how many times I asked her if she was okay, did she want something to eat, did she need to go to the toilet, remembering that was a common complaint for Ace’s sister when she was carrying her baby last year.

  Each question was answered with a soft no and a headshake against my shoulder. It worried me how much of her light was extinguished, and I missed her throwing her sass back at me, standing up against my overbearing need to protect her. The independent streak I loved the most about her, nowhere to be seen.

  “Meadow Tessler?” A nurse appeared at the entrance to the waiting room, calling out and looking around.

  “That’s me,” Meadow answered, smiling at the young nurse.

  I choked on my laugh when she gawked at Meadow sitting on my knee, appearing taken back by our display. Meadow giggled too, rolling her eyes at me, almost like her old self but, when the nurse sniffed and tilted her chin up in a snobbish display, Meadow tensed in my arms. I immediately knew that she was thinking about my mother, and until Meadow pointed it out to me, I never noticed just how much Irena sniffed and jutted out her chin. A gesture I was quickly coming to despise.

  “We’ll find another doctor for the rest of the pregnancy, baby, so let’s just let them check you over this one time, okay?”

  “Thank you, Spunk,” Meadow sighed gratefully. My heart skipping a beat, that was twice now she’d used my nickname, and that was a good enough sign for me.

  Meadow and I were meant to be together, and we were meant to be parents to this miracle, and mark my words, Meadow was going to be my wife.

  I would bet my life on it.

  ***

  The doctor’s stern warning echoed in my mind as I raced around the kitchen preparing a meal of leafy greens, protein and complex carbohydrates.

  To my utter shock and disbelief, Meadow had lost six kilos. She insisted that it had been longer than the three weeks since we … parted. That surprised me; I had been so stuck in my own problems and pity party that I had not even noticed her silent suffering or the consequent weight loss.

  The best the doctor could ascertain, Meadow was in her fifth week and still very much in the danger zone of miscarrying. When he casually told us that Meadow was under a healthy weight and her nutrition needed to be improved. He put her on some heavy-duty vitamins and suggested she sleep only at night, rest during the day, and take on twenty minutes of light exercise a day. Nothing more than a short walk, and no working for at least a month or ideally until she reached the twelve-week mark.

  I planned on making all of that happen, and on the drive home I formulated a plan on how I could take some time off from the company. Ace was easily capable of taking over the office, and Boofa was showing signs of running the crew without my help. Whatever it was going to take, I was stepping down until the foreseeable future.

  Soft footsteps behind me and the scent of flowers and musk invaded my senses. Since we’d returned from the doctors, Meadow had been subdued, not talking but not shrinking away from my touch. She allowed me to carry her from the car, settle her on the couch and even let me fuss, tucking a blanket around her. When she let me kiss her lightly on the lips, I nearly fucking started to cry in relief.

  “Hey baby, I’m making a Caesar Salad with homemade croutons and a boiled egg,” I told her my back to her.

  “Umm, Luca?” Meadow hedged, her tone bewildered.

  “Yeah, baby?” Turning around, I stilled when I saw my mobile phone in her hand. And I knew without looking that my mother had messaged me.

  Shit.

  “You got a message from your mum. What does she mean when she asked you to forgive her and recons
ider her being part of our baby’s life?” Meadow held up the phone and I could see the message app was open.

  Shit.

  Luca said nothing while he stared at his phone in my hand. I knew he wasn’t angry with me for looking at his messages. Early on in our relationship, we agreed not to have secrets, to always be honest, and we both had the freedom to use each other’s phones whenever needed.

  And seeing as my phone was back at the bungalow along with all my other belongings, I didn’t hesitate to pick up Luca’s phone lying there on the coffee table to ring Trish and let her and Lennie know how my appointment went and that I was with Luca. Of course, they had to know already as I suspected they were in on today’s pantomime, along with Michael and Jeff. My sister and her boyfriend were still on my shit list and I would be dealing with them in due time. I wasn’t pissed that they wanted Luca and me to work out our issues, just that they decided now was the time.

  I wasn’t ready to confront Mrs Donatella and her daughters being too stressed about other things to get stuck into that can of worms. I wasn’t sure if I was ever going to be ready, and the last three weeks showed me living without Luca was not plausible for my heart to cope with, but her? I could easily live the rest of my life without speaking to her or even seeing her again, and going by this text, I might not have to worry.

  Did Luca confront his mother? Did he find out what I suspected? That she faked her frailness and the fainting episode? How? When?

  Reading the text, I could only surmise that Luca had walked away from his family for our baby and me. The joy I should be experiencing now that god awful woman was out was non-existent; instead, I was overwhelmed with sorrow for Luca. The promise he’d made to his father drove him to be a good man, and he was. Loyal and fierce when it came to those he loves, gentle and kind and thoughtful enough to put up with his sister’s constant nagging and uselessness. Hardworking and proud, continuing his father’s legacy without complaint, taking last-minute trips to see panicked clients.