Blind Man's Bluff

by Gene Lembrick

  “Hurry up, bro, we got a surprise for you guys,” says Angel.

  Jesus takes the phone from his brother. He tries to control his laughter.

  “Y’all get here like five minutes ago, kid. Hurry up!”

  “Okay, we’ll be right there,” Brandon says. “The twins want us at the school a-sap,” Brandon tells Chris and Dominic. They begin to run toward the school to see what the hurry is with the twins.

  Angel and Jesus are the football team’s outside linebackers. If you see one, the other is near. You always have to keep your guard up with these two, because they are pranksters to the core. Jesus figured that nervous freshmen would be an easy target for the prank they came up with.

  Brandon, Chris, and Dominic arrive to see the twins waiting out front for them.

  “What’s going on?” asks Dominic.

  “Follow us,” says Angel.

  The twins lead the other three to the boys’ restroom that’s nearest the school’s main entrance. The restroom is typical: two urinals and two stalls. Jesus goes to one stall and opens the door for viewing; Angel opens the other for the same purpose.

  “Check it out!” Angel says.

  “Check what out?” asks Chris.

  “Look closer,” says Jesus.

  He and his brother giggle.

  The twins had brought some clear plastic wrap from home. They tightly and neatly wrapped up both of the toilets with it. If someone isn’t paying attention, they won’t notice the wrap on the toilet.

  “I don’t get it,” Brandon says.

  “You’ll see. Everyone look casual. Dominic and Brandon, act like you’re using those urinals. DJ, look pretty in the mirror as you always do,” says Angel.

  Jesus is peeking out of the bathroom for a victim.

  “Okay, guys, here someone comes,” he says.

  A new student goes to one of the open stalls, as the boys all act as if they are minding their own business. As the new student goes to urinate, his urine bounces off the tight wrap onto his pants.

  “DAMMIT”

  The boys are trying their darnedest to control their laughter. Another student walks in and goes to the other free stall. However, this student drops his pants. The boys notice that this student is sitting to defecate.

  “This is going to be ugly,” whispers Dominic to the guys. “Let’s go!”

  All the boys are cracking up with laughter as they head into the hallway, which is packed with students arriving for the new school year. Suddenly, the middle of the hallway the boys are in parts like the Red Sea. Without asking anyone to move, the pathway is opened up for Lucy Ramirez to walk through freely. Every eye in sight is looking at her from top to bottom. She seems to know that, at the present moment, the hallway is her stage, and that everyone’s attention is on her. She takes her time; she’s in no rush. Her long dark hair bounces behind her from side to side with every step she takes. The girls are envious of this Latina’s beauty; the guys are drooling like a thirsty dog in the desert. Among the boys, the twins speak first.

  “Damn!”

  “Yeah, that’s what’s up!” Chris says.

  “Nice!” says Dominic.

  Brandon doesn’t say a word, but just smiles.

  Lucy speeds up once she sees her target. She runs into Brandon’s arms as if there’s no one around.

  “Hey, Papi; te echo de menos! We have a lot of catching up to do,” says Lucy.

  “Yes, we do. Those recruiting trips took up most of my summer. What was the other thing you said?”

  “I missed you!”

  “I missed you, too!”

  Brandon and Lucy leave the other boys alone as they walk away together. The boys shake their heads in wonder at Lucy’s beauty.

  Walking up to the school is the clique of Brooklyn, Lauren, Vicki, and Ida.

  “We’re seniors now, ladies,” says Brooklyn. “This school is ours now!”

  “Thank God we don’t have that dress code yet,” says Vicki, and Lauren says, “Yes, it would’ve been a shame to have to wear a uniform. I’m so glad it takes effect next year.”

  “Here we go, and it’s the same old thing all the time. Do you guys think of anything else beside clothes?” Ida asks.

  Brooklyn, Lauren, and Vicki look at each other and then the three of them say, “YES! BOYS!”

  Ida shakes her head, and replies “Really?”

  “Where’s Riley?” asks Lauren.

  “She moved to Meriden over the summer,” says Ida. “Her dad got a new job.”

  “Oh, really?” says Lauren. “A few years back, Karen and Korey Moore moved to that same town. They sure move a lot. At least Riley knows someone already there.”

  Dominic walks past the ladies with a hello, and gives Ida a strange stare.

  The girls say together, “Hi, Dom.”

  Dominic heads off to his first class.

  “Why does he always look at you in a strange way, Ida?” asks Vicki.

  “Good question! One day, I’m going to find out why. He’s been doing that since he moved here a few years back.”

  Vicki laughs and says, “He wants you, girl.”

  “No, thanks,” says Ida. “He’s all about his weed. Plus, the boys here are just too immature. Everything’s a joke. If you hang around the twins then you’re also a little boy mentally. However, Dom’s different. If he cleaned himself up, who knows…?”

  • • •

  The twins are in their biology class, teasing the school’s brown-noser, Caroll Rodgers. Caroll is the geeky obese kid that enjoys kissing up to teachers whenever he has a chance. He has a habit of wearing clothes a size too small for him. It seems like every few seconds; Caroll is pushing his glasses up his nose as if they’re about to slide off his face. Caroll is straightening up some papers on the Mr. Galligan’s desk.

  “Get away from the teacher’s desk, Caroll!” says Angel.

  “Call me C-Rod, Angel,” Caroll replies.

  “You have to be cool and have a backbone to get that kind of name, Caroll,” says Jesus, then asks his brother.

  “Enough with the teasing, Angel,” says Mr. Galligan.

  “I’m Angel. That’s Jesus, sir.”

  “Oh, okay. Whatever, I still can’t figure out who’s who with you two sometimes.”

  Jesus laughs at his brother for getting scolded for his comment.

  “How could a guy’s mom name a male that? Caroll, Caroll?” asks Jesus.

  “Exactly,” a snickering Angel replies. “She must have wanted a girl.”

  Caroll goes back to his desk; he sits directly in front of Jesus. As Caroll is about to sit, Jesus notices his underwear is exposed since Caroll’s tight shirt is rolled slightly up his back. Jesus grabs the back of Caroll’s briefs tightly as he begins to sit down. This gives Caroll Rodgers the ultimate wedgie.

  “Ahh!” Caroll yells out.

  The classroom bursts out in laughter at him.

  Mr. Galligan asks an embarrassed Caroll, “Do we have an issue, Mr. Rodgers?”

  “You okay, C-Rod?” asks Angel with a wink.

  “I’m okay sir. Nothing that I can’t handle.”

  Caroll looks back at Angel and says, “Oh, to avoid trouble, suddenly I’m C-Rod now?”

  Caroll is doing his best to dig his underwear out from his ass through his khakis with little success.

  “Caroll, when you get out of the shower, do you wrap your hair up instead of wrapping a towel around your waist?” asks Angel.

  The classroom laughs at Angel’s silly joke.

  “Settle down, everyone,” says Mr. Galligan as he continues to write on the blackboard.

  Jesus leans up toward the back of Caroll’s neck.

  “I can smell your dad’s 20-year-old cologne again, phew,” says Jesus. “Hey, are you the type of guy that
sprays the cologne into the air and runs under it to shimmy while the drops of the mist sprinkles over your body?”

  Once again the classroom laughs at Caroll’s expense. Even Mr. Galligan turns around to face the class with a laugh of his own.

  “That’s an odd imagination you have, Jesus,” says Mr. Galligan. “Okay, it’s time to get serious, the Def Comedy Jam moment is over for the morning.”

  Caroll asks, “May I be excused to use the restroom?”

  “Go right ahead; and hurry back.”

  “Be careful of the toilets, C-Rod,” Angel says, “I’ve been hearing stories.” Angel adds his sneaky grin.

  The twins give each other a fist-dap, as if for a job well-done.

  • • •

  That Afternoon

  It’s lunch time and the cafeteria is filling up. Brandon brings his tray over to where the twins are sitting. Brandon starts to open his milk for a sip, but realizes he’s forgotten his dessert. He gets up to walk over to the line for it.

  “Do you have any of those small packages of salt?” Angel says to his brother.

  Jesus nods. He knows exactly what his brother is thinking. Angel begins to pour the salt into Brandon’s opened milk container. Anyone can be the victim of one of their pranks, even the All-American quarterback. Brandon comes back to the table and sits down. He begins to chow down on his meal. The twins are finished with their lunch and get up from the table.

  “Later, Brandon,” they say.

  “Peace, guys.”

  They wait by the entrance of the cafeteria for Brandon’s reaction.

  Caroll sits down with his meal across from Brandon. Brandon begins to gulp down his milk and then spits it all out into Caroll’s face. The cafeteria roars with laughter. Brandon begins to look around for the twins. He sees them cracking up by the exit.

  “I’m sorry, Caroll,” says Brandon.

  “Today just isn’t my day,” Caroll replies.

  With a slight laugh, Brandon says, “I heard about the wedgie.”

  “Don’t worry,” says Caroll. “I’ll think of something special for those twin juveniles one day.”

  In another area of the cafeteria, the girls all sit at a table they feel belongs to them. Underclassmen aren’t welcome. As Lucy walks by Brooklyn, Ida, Vicki, and Lauren, they call her over to their table and she joins them. Lucy considers them snobby girls at times, but feels compelled to join their table. All of them are jealous of her having the star quarterback as a boyfriend. When Lucy isn’t paying attention, they look at her with annoyance, especially Ida. She’s very aware of those looks.

  Brooklyn asks, “What’s up, girl? You look cute today, Lucy.”

  “No disrespect,” says Vicki, “but, damn, Brandon is fine!”

  “Watch yourself, Vicki Lynn. All that fineness is mine! Thanks, Brook.”

  “I’m just saying, girl. Wow.”

  “Where have you been shopping, Lucy?” says Lauren, looking at Lucy’s outfit.

  “Yeah, you’re giving me a run for best-dressed,” says Brooklyn.

  “Excuse me, both of ya’ll heifers are fighting for second place with me around,” says Vicki.

  The other girls can’t help but laugh at Vicki’s confidence.

  “I went to New York early in the summer to shop,” says Lucy.

  “I wish I knew; I would have hitched a ride,” says Vicki.

  “Maybe we should plan a trip to the city soon,” says Brooklyn.

  “Yes, I’m all for it. Count me in,” says Lauren.

  “I’m down,” says Vicki.

  “Sure,” says Lucy.

  The girls turn their attention to the last one left to reply, Ida.

  “I may as well go to keep ya’ll out of trouble.”

  “Yeah, whatever, Debbie Downer,” says Vicki.

  Lucy, Lauren, Vicki, and Brooklyn all begin to talk about their outfits with each other. Ida is sitting with them but doesn’t engage with their discussion. She rolls her eyes and heaves a deep sigh. When she takes her eyes off them, she sees someone approaching them whom she doesn’t care for, Chris.

  “What’s going on, baby?” he asks.

  Christopher and Brooklyn have been a couple for nearly a year, but from the way Chris acts, you would think he’s single. They hug, and he takes a seat to her left.

  “Hey, baby, I haven’t seen you all day,” says Brooklyn. “Where have you been? Avoiding me?” She smiles.

  “Of course not, just hanging with the guys in between classes.”

  Behind Brooklyn’s back, Chris rubs his fingers on Lauren’s hand. Vicki and Lucy are talking together. When he doesn’t think anyone notices, Chris winks at Vicki. Little does he know that Ida sees the wink and that he is touching Lauren’s hand behind Brooklyn’s back. Chris thinks that since there’s a wall behind them, no one will notice. He doesn’t know Ida very well, it seems. It crosses her mind to bust his game, but he’d only deny it, and everyone would buy the crap he’s giving. Ida thinks to herself that eventually he’ll get in a jam that will open the eyes of her boy crazy friends. Ida decides to get up and head to her next class.

  “I’m suddenly sick. There’s a foul smell around here,” she says, glancing at Chris as she leaves.

  He frowns as if to say, whatever. The rest of the girls and Chris also leave the table. They all head out to their remaining classes for the day.

  The Locker Room

  It’s 6:00 p.m., and football practice has just ended. The guys are in the locker room taking off their equipment, preparing to head home.

  “So, Brandon, how were those recruiting visits you had?” Chris asks.

  “Yeah, Mr. All-American quarterback, what’s good?” says Jesus.

  Jesus notices that Coach Milford is leaving his office, so he gives his brother a soft elbow to the arm and nods his head in the direction of the empty office with its door wide open. Angel knows exactly what his brother is thinking and they smile at each other. The other boys are in such heavy conversation that they never notice the twins. Angel grabs his toothpaste out of his locker and slips away from the others toward the coach’s office. Angel loads up the listening end of the phone with toothpaste, and then sits it back down onto the base. Angel slides back in with the boys’ conversation.

  “All the driving was draining,” Brandon says. “Staying in hotels city to city had my dad and me beat!”

  “Man, we don’t give a rat’s ass about that!” says Jesus. “What’s up with the colleges?”

  “I know, just messing with ya’. Every college made me feel like royalty. I felt like a movie star or something. They let me know that their school needs a player like me for them to go to the next level. Also, with hard work, they’re confident that eventually I’ll be playing somewhere on Sundays in the pros.”

  “That’s what’s up! What schools have you been to so far?” Angel asks.

  “USC, Florida, University of Texas and Michigan. My last trip will be right here, UConn.”

  “Nice,” Angel says.

  “How about the honeys?” Chris asks.

  “Wow!” Brandon says.

  Brandon and Chris give each other five.

  Brandon says, “The women at every college were beautiful. Thousands and thousands.”

  “Get the hell out of here!” says Chris

  “No joke, D.J. All you guys are sweating my Lucy.”

  The other boys gave a nonchalant look as if they don’t check her out. They wouldn’t want the best quarterback in the country to feel disrespected. However, Brandon knows that every boy in school likes Lucy. It actually turns him on that others like her; it makes him appreciate her even more.

  “C’mon, son, don’t even front. Well, when you’re in college it’s not like high school where the whole school is sweating three girls. Beautiful women are like a dime a dozen.”r />
  “No shit?” Dominic says.

  “If you’re an athlete, women flock to you. I remember this one football player was showing me around with his girl. Fellas, she looked like a model. What I found odd is that she was walking slightly behind him with two of her fingers in his back pocket as they walked or stood. It was like she was attached to his back pocket.”

  All of the boys together said, “GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!”

  “True story.”

  “Man, I got to step my grades up; I want to further my education,” Chris says, laughing.

  “It’s funny that when I tell people that I’m from Connecticut, they’ll say, There’s Black people in Connecticut?”

  All the boys find that hilarious.

  “If I had a dime every time I’ve heard that,” Brandon says as he shakes his head.

  “Do you have an idea which school you’re going to choose?” asks Dominic.

  “Not yet. All that was fun and all, but I’m not going to base my decision on women or what someone promises me. The bottom line is to get my degree; football on Sundays isn’t a guarantee. If the pros come knocking, great; however, that degree is a permanent achievement.”

  “That’s real talk, son!” says Angel.

  “My parents have been good to me; I want to make them proud,” says Brandon.

  “I’m sure you’ve already done that,” says Dominic.

  “Thanks, dude. How about you guys? Do you have any idea where you’re going to play at yet?”

  “We have an idea, but we’re waiting for national signing day in February to decide. Either way, it’s a two for-one because we’re staying together,” says Jesus.

  Angel gives his brother a fist dap.

  “Brandon, I’ve always wondered, why do you call Chris D.J.?” asks Jesus.

  Dominic, Chris, and Brandon all laugh. They are the only ones in on the private joke. After he stops laughing, Brandon walks over to Chris. He stands behind him with both of his hands on Christopher’s shoulders; Chris has a huge smile on his face. Brandon’s six-foot-three frame slightly towers over Christopher’s six-foot-two.