by Lane Martin
“I don't have any condoms in here." He groaned as I sat up behind him and put my arms around him from behind.
"You don't?" The surprise in my voice must have been apparent.
He moved so fast it caught me completely off guard. He pinned me below him and held my arms firmly above my head. "I don't just bring random girls home, Penny." He kissed the skin right below my ear. "I swear, you're sweeter than all forty-six flavors at McCain's." God, I needed him. Ask for what you want.
"Make love to me, Carson. You don't need a condom." He stared at me like I had lost my mind. I rushed to clarify. "I mean. I'm clean and I'm on birth control. I assume you're clean too."
"I'm clean. I can show you my last test. I haven't been with anyone since my—" I stopped him with a searing kiss. I had no desire to know who he had been with before me. It was time for our duet.
“Are you sure?"
He snickered as I practically tore his athletic shorts and briefs from his body and he landed on the mattress.
"I'm positive." I moved to his side, thinking he would roll over on top of me.
"Nope," he said as he grabbed me like I weighed nothing and pulled me on top of him. “I want my first of many music lessons while you ride me. Show me your favorite piece of music." Sex before had always been mechanical. It had been nothing like what I had already experienced with Carson, and we still hadn't even technically had sex. I’d never thought of it like music before, but now that I had an idea of what it could be like, I knew that was exactly what it should be like. Similar to different pieces of music, there were different kinds of lovemaking. Music I knew, but what piece would I play for him?
"I don't know how to do this," I admitted as I straddled him.
"Hey." He tipped up my downturned chin so I was forced to look into his eyes. "There's no wrong way to do this, my sweet Penny. Just kiss me." He gently nudged me forward and I brushed my lips softly against his as a song came to mind. Edward Elgar wrote “Salut d'Amour” for his wife as a gift after she wrote him a poem titled “Love's Grace.” The exchange captured the essence of that moment between us—me not only taking what I wanted but also giving so much more in return. I thought about how it would feel to share a love like the one between Elgar and his beloved wife and moved closer as I deepened the kiss. His hands moved to my waist as Carson guided me down his length to the rhythm he let me set until I felt that now familiar sense of cadenza coming over me. Carson flipped us and took over. He never changed the tempo I had set until we reached the coda of the piece.
"Con fuoco!" I demanded before remembering he didn't know what I was asking for. "With fire!" I clarified, and Carson didn't disappoint. "Allegro. Fast." He moved faster in and out as I clung to him until we both reached the crescendo.
"Bravo," I praised him as he held me in his arms. We were both still winded from our spectacular performance. I had never known sex could be so fabulous. Honestly, I’d thought something was wrong with me. Now I knew it hadn’t been me; it had been awful because I’d been duetting with the wrong person.
"Does that mean I get a repeat performance?" he asked in jest.
Heck, he could have season tickets if he wanted them.
Chapter Fourteen
CARSON
"What are you doing?" Penny asked as she climbed back into my trailer.
When Penny's stomach had grumbled loudly as we’d lain spent in each other's arms, I knew I needed to feed her. I’d told her she had ten minutes to get ready, and I loved that she didn't grumble or tell me she couldn't possibly get ready that quickly. Nope. My girl tossed my discarded t-shirt over her head and made a run for the house, giggling the whole way. I thought about the glorious sound of her laugh as I quickly got dressed. She still had four more minutes when she returned.
"I'm downloading an app of musical terms. I don't want you to have to translate when you're telling me con brio next time." I pocketed my phone and moved closer to the woman I’d plainly shocked. She was wearing an oversized sweater and those stretchy legging things with a pair of boots. Her hair was braided down her back and I had the urge to pull it while I fucked her con brio from behind. Her cheeks reddened as I imagined all the new terms I was going to learn and the fun we were going to have putting them into practice. She darted out her tongue while she took me in. Yeah, we were going to be having a lot of fun.
"Do you give extra credit to students who study really hard?" I pulled her into my arms and punctuated the last word of my sentence by grinding against her. I needed her to know what she did to me. She opened her mouth to respond—no doubt something naughty was about to come out of her sweet mouth—but I stopped her. "Don't answer that now or we'll never make it to Bertha's. If that happens, we will never get this remodel done." I took her hand in mine and led her out of the house before I could toss her over my shoulder to take her back to bed.
"Oh my God, these are the best pancakes I've ever had in my life! Henry has to taste them." Penny took out her phone and took a picture of her plate of food before sending off a text I could only assume was to this Henry. The thought angered me more than it should have.
"Who's Henry?" I put my fork down and tried to keep an open mind while I waited for an answer. We still didn't know so much about each other, but Penny didn't strike me as the type of woman who got around. And when we had been together earlier, it hadn’t seemed like she had a lot of experience with men. Good.
Penny lifted her phone and scrolled for a few seconds before placing it face down on the table and pushing it towards me while taking another bite of the pancakes that were almost as good as my mom's. Almost. I hesitated before picking it up. I didn't believe in secrets in a relationship, not that I had a definition for what exactly we were after this morning. But I knew firsthand what secrets in a relationship could do. I had nothing to hide from Penny. Except maybe the fact I was terrified of what I was already feeling for her.
Penny watched me as she finished her bite, then said, "I don't have anything to hide, Carson. Henry is my friend. He lives in San Francisco and is the conductor of the San Francisco Symphony. We met at a summer music program when we were ten. Before this morning, I had five other lovers. He has never been one of them and never will be. He's G-A-Y and I don't mean good at yoga. Hell, I'll need to be more worried about you than you are about me when he comes here to help me with my class." God, she was fun when she was fired up.
I whooped so hard I almost spit out my coffee. "Good at yoga? Where the hell did you come up with that?" I was trying to lighten the mood by deflecting. Penny didn't owe me an explanation. I was an ass. "Are you done eating?" I tried when she didn't answer me.
She sighed. "Yes, I'm done."
"Good. Now come here." Her phone still sat between us on the table and I put my hand out to her. I was grateful and relieved when she took it and joined me on my side of the table. "Show me, Penny. I want to know you." I held her phone while she scrolled through her pictures. Shots of Henry mixed in with beautiful views from around the world taken from hotel room windows were about the only things on her camera roll, aside from an occasional shot of food.
"Here, you showed me yours. I'll show you mine." I pulled out my phone and opened the photo gallery. It would have been the perfect time to tell her about Kara, but I didn't. I knew Penny wouldn't find a single picture of her on my phone. All photos of my ex had been erased the day she’d left after I’d polished off a bottle of Fireball, but I wasn't sorry they were gone. What I was sorry about was all the time I couldn't get back. Time I’d spent going to see her at school instead of going home to see my parents and grandparents. Time I’d missed with friends I’d distanced myself from because they had tried to warn me about her. But time never stood still, and it couldn't be rewound. All I could do now was choose to spend my time wisely. Kara didn't deserve another second of it wasted on her, even if it was only to tell Penny about her.
"Is that Rascal?" Penny covered her mouth and tears formed in her eyes as she stared at the pictur
es I had forgotten were on my phone. In them he looked nothing like the dog he was today. We still weren't sure how he survived the fire. It had been over three weeks since the fire had begun when I found him.
We thought we were prepared. The property my parents and I owned was cleared of vegetation and debris from around it, creating a defensible space. The clearing was meant to create a break and slow the spread of the fire. It didn’t. Nothing could have prepared us for what happened. In my head I knew it, but my heart was an entirely different organ. No matter how many times I reminded myself we had been among the lucky ones, I just couldn’t get past it. That was why I came to Sunnyville in the first place. I guess you could say I needed to create my own defensible space of sorts. A way to protect myself from being reminded I couldn’t stop the fire or the devastation it left in its wake.
"Carson?" Penny put her hand on my arm. Her voice was etched with concern. The simple action drew me out of my memories. No amount of years on the ladder could have prepared a person for that kind of devastation.
"Let's go home." Home. I liked the sound of that. I hadn't felt like I had one since I’d lost mine in the fire. Not until now.
We were heading back to the house after a trip to Penny's new favorite home improvement store with supplies to paint the now bare walls. "So, I'm lucky number six. I like six. It's a good number. Six is sexy."
"You're sexy. Are you going to tell me your number?" She bit her bottom lip.
"Sixty-nine," I offered as I continued to drive back to her house. I hoped she knew I was joking. It wasn't my number; it was what I wanted to do to Penny.
"Fuck," Penny cursed, out of character, as we pulled up to the house.
"I'm kidding, Penny." I glanced over at her, but her gaze was locked on the front of her house. I glanced back at the house. A black town car with dark tinted windows was parked out in front.
"Who is that?" I asked as I placed my hand on her thigh to calm her. Her breathing had changed and her legs bounced up and down like she was ready to bolt any second.
"My father," she said barely above a whisper as my truck came to a stop in the driveway. Penny didn't wait for me to open her door to get out. The driver's door of the sedan opened and a man in a suit walked toward the back of the car and opened the rear door. A tall man in a three-piece suit emerged. He straightened his tie and fastened his buttons before moving in Penny's direction.
"Penelope, I've been waiting here for hours." Hours? We hadn't been gone that long. Her phone hadn't rung in the time we were gone. I would have noticed since I had been holding it for a good chunk of time. I didn't like the way he said her name.
"I'm sorry, sir, I didn't realize you were coming." Yeah, I didn't like the way she cowered in his presence either. She was no longer the woman who hours ago had told me exactly how she wanted me to fuck her. I pulled her to my side. It didn't matter who he was. I didn't like the guy.
"Who's this? Is he the reason for this nonsense? We raised you better than that, Penelope," he tutted. Penny gazed up at me. I'm sure she could feel how rigid I was. It was taking every ounce of control I had not to give the man a piece of my mind. Her dad? Who called their father sir?
"Carson, this is my father, William Anderson." I liked the fact that she addressed me first. I think it was her way of trying to soothe me. I’d only met the man and I already didn't like him, but I would bite my tongue for her. For now.
"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Anderson." It wasn't. I lifted my hand to shake his, but he didn't take it. What an ass. My father taught me to give another man my respect until he had proven he didn't deserve it. I tried, but this man had shown his true colors. It didn’t matter who he was. I wanted to shield her from him. I couldn't imagine how her childhood had been with a father like him. I’d hit the jackpot when it came to parents. My dad was my biggest champion and my mom was the best of the best. The idea of Penny not having the support of her parents made me unhappy. She deserved parents like mine.
"If you'd excuse us, mister...?" Really? "I need to see this monstrosity my daughter has wasted her money on. The realtor will be arriving shortly. She's had enough playtime." He redirected his attention to his daughter. "It's time for you to stop being ridiculous and come to your senses." William glowered at his adult daughter as he scolded her. She wasn't being foolish at all in my mind. Seemed to me she was investing in her future by buying a home and working hard at the school to teach children all that music had to offer them. I admired her determination. She had told me that not all the children would play instruments but she hoped she could instill in them an appreciation for music in all its forms. I agreed with her that music was a great form of expression and should be enjoyed by all.
"St. James," I said, to answer his implied question, and dropped the hand I’d offered the rude-as-hell Anderson. I kept reminding myself he was Penny's father in the hope that I could muster a modicum of tolerance for him, if only for her sake. Penny squeezed the hand she was still holding. I'm not sure if it was for her or me, but I squeezed hers in return. I'm by your side.
"We had an agreement, Father. I committed to the school and have no intention to sell my house or leave with you. You can support me, perhaps come inside and see my plans for my house or leave. But I'm not going with you." Penny's words were firm, but the quake in her voice was evident.
I couldn't have been prouder of her. William Anderson was menacing, and seeing my woman stand up to him was inspiring. Her determination made me think about the space I had created to protect myself from being hurt again. Penny’s resolve made me realize something. We did what we could to protect ourselves. Sometimes it wasn’t enough. You did it anyway. Were we ever fully protected? Nothing was ever guaranteed. What other choice was there? You could let your fear consume you or you could fight it. Penny was a warrior. It was time for me to join her in the battle.
“I think it’s time for you to go.” I told him firmly.
"I see." William's abrupt answer and immediate departure made his feelings on the matter clear. I wrapped my arms around Penny as he climbed into the waiting car and left without a second glance. What kind of father turned his back on his child? A child he should be impressed with.
I tightened my hold on her as we watched the car drive out of sight. "I'm proud of you, Penny." I kissed the top of her head and held her as she sobbed. Moments went by as I held her, then I lifted her in my arms.
"Where are we going?" she asked into my shoulder as I walked back toward the trailer while peppering her with tender kisses.
"I need to show you exactly how dazzled I am by you, pretty Penny." Did she have any idea how amazing she was?
"Oh, really?" she asked. She sounded unsure of herself, which nearly gutted me.
"Yeah, I have a feeling not many people can stand up to William Anderson like that. Do you have any idea how strong you are?" I didn't tell her that I already thought she had the power to break me completely. I was defenseless when it came to Penelope Anderson.
Chapter Fifteen
PENNY
I t was Valentine's Day and I couldn't remember ever feeling so... out of sorts. It was a Friday, and the kids were all so excited. It probably had a lot to do with the candygrams that were being delivered all day. Everywhere I looked I saw the school staff with gorgeous bouquets of red roses and helium balloons. I saw multiple heart-shaped boxes of candy being delivered throughout the day. It wasn't depression I was feeling. I was happier than I could ever remember. My students always put a smile on my face. I loved sharing my passion for music with them because it reminded me how much I loved it.
Things at the house were coming along. Okay, the interior had been demolished, but we had to tear it apart so we could put it back together. We. Carson and me. I loved spending time with him and working on the house together. When we weren't working, we were together, and I loved every minute of it. But I wasn't sure where we stood or where we were going.
"Hey, girl." Cathy looked ridiculous in her themed outfit.
On her feet she wore red boots. White leggings covered with bright red hearts were topped with a matching long-sleeved red shirt with one large white heart in the center and her hair was tied with a red bow at the top of her head. It looked like something one of the kids in her class should have been wearing. Then again, maybe that made it the perfect outfit. Her students loved her and she was an excellent teacher.
"Hi, Cathy." She often stopped by my class at the end of the day to see what I was doing. As much as the woman drove me crazy, I also looked forward to her tales. She seemed to know something about everyone and I looked forward to hearing all the best tidbits.
"You look cute," Cathy said. I knew everyone would be in red for the holiday, so I’d worn a blue dress covered in red flowers. My style had changed a lot since my arrival and I liked it. I owned several pairs of jeans at that point and couldn't even recall the last time I’d worn a pencil skirt.
"Thank you. Do you have big plans for tonight?" It wouldn't surprise me if she didn't try to wrangle me into a trip to Hooligan's.
"God, no. The last thing I want to do on Valentine's Day is to be surrounded by couples making googly eyes at each other." Cathy made a look of disgust. I couldn't help but laugh at my talkative friend.
"What about you and the fire hottie?” she inquired. “Are you crazy kids knocking down walls or installing baseboards tonight?" She made the tasks sound lascivious and finished with an obscene looking wink. If only she knew. My cheeks reddened thinking about Carson. He had been hammering last night, but it wasn't a nail into a wall. Wink, wink.
"Do tell, you naughty little vixen!" I continued to flush. Cathy sank into my chair like I was about to divulge all the juicy details. I had to turn away from her. I really needed to work on my poker face.
"Carson is on duty tonight. I wanted to bake something for him, but the kitchen is torn apart and...." I fiddled with a basket of maracas.